Jenny in Florida Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 (edited) My beloved Matilda ("Tilda," to all who knew her) was diagnosed with kidney insufficiency in May, but we were under the impression that she likely had several years left, as long as we took good care of her. We switched her to a different medication for her joint pain that was supposed to be less stress on her kidneys and tried five different prescriptive kidney care foods until we found one she would tolerate. Nonetheless, over the last few weeks, she had gotten pickier and pickier about food, eventually refusing to eat the prescriptive stuff at all. I was concerned that she was losing weight and seemed miserable, so I gave in and bought a bag of her old favorite. We also started offering her treats such as watermelon and cantaloupe just to tempt her to eat until I could get her to the vet to discuss a plan. It worked for a few days, and then she basically quit eating again. On Thursday morning, I called the vet and said we needed to move up her appointment, that she needed to be seen that day, immediately. Honestly, I thought the problem was likely dental. She has had issues before and had a couple of teeth removed. However, they ran blood work and urinalysis and found that her numbers were drastically elevated and that she was likely in end-stage kidney failure. They also discovered a couple of ulcers in her mouth, which are typical of kidney problems. They admitted her immediately and put her on IV fluids, antibiotics (just in case there was an infection causing the acute problem). They did a medicated mouthwash to alleviate the pain of the ulcers. For the last two days, I have shuttled her back and forth between the regular vet (during the day) and the emergency vet (at night) so she could be kept on IV fluids and under observation. As of this morning, her lab work was no better, and it was clear she was declining. My husband and I went to visit her this morning and made the heart-wrenching decision to let her go. I held her in my arms and on my lap for 30 minutes petting her and telling her how much I loved her. We did a quick video call with my daughter, who had been very close with Tilda until she moved out on her own a few years ago. Then I continued to cuddle her and love on her while the vet did the injections and I felt her last heartbeat. Tilda has been my best friend and near-constant companion for almost 14 years. Many days, she has been the only reason I can find to get out of bed in the morning. I cannot describe how much I will miss her. Edited October 15, 2022 by Jenny in Florida 67 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikslo Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 Your post made me cry. Sending hugs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyoffive Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 Oh I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You gave her such a happy life. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I’m so sorry for your loss. Crying with you. What a beautiful, sweet soul. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porque? Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 So sorry for your loss. From reading your posts over the last few years it was evident what a light Matilda was in your life. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mominco Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 Oh Jenny I am so sorry for your loss.(((hugs))) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innisfree Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I’m so very sorry. She was a lucky dog to be loved so much. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I'm so sorry. She was so beautiful and I know you have always posted about what a great companion she was to you. Your post made me cry. I'm just so very sorry. 😞 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EKS Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I am so sorry, Jenny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I'm so sorry, too. I know you've been going through a hard time and I hate that you lost your precious Matilda. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I am so sorry Jenny. I know she has been a great dog for you. ((((Jenny)))) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditto Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 Oh Jenny, I am heartbroken for you. My deepest sympathy on the loss of your sweet Tilda. Many many hugs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoVanGogh Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I am so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
history-fan Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 So sorry 😢 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stephanier.1765 Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I am so incredibly sorry! That kind of loss leaves such a hole in our lives. I did this just a few years ago and not having her by my side or at my feet feels wrong. Not having her to cuddle up with in bed feels wrong. Her not being here is wrong. I so wish they lived longer. ❤️ 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSmomof2 Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I’m so sorry for your loss. 😢 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grace Hopper Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 So sorry, Jenny. What a sweet companion. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kfamily Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I'm so very sorry. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I'm so sorry. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cintinative Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I'm so sorry for your loss. They really are family. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corraleno Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I'm so very sorry, Jenny. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I am so sorry 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 What a beauty and a true friend. Deepest sympathy to you and your family, Jenny. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whitestavern Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 What a sweet pup. So sorry for your loss. Sending you a virtual hug. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I’m so sorry Jenny 😞 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 It's heartrending to say goodbye. I'm so sorry. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spy Car Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 (edited) I'm really sorry Jenny. Losing a beloved dog is very hard. There is a poem I'm going to share by one of my favorite poets, Robinson Jeffers, in the hope it that touches you: The House Dog's Grave (Haig, an English bulldog) I've changed my ways a little; I cannot now Run with you in the evenings along the shore, Except in a kind of dream; and you, if you dream a moment, You see me there. So leave awhile the paw-marks on the front door Where I used to scratch to go out or in, And you'd soon open; leave on the kitchen floor The marks of my drinking-pan. I cannot lie by your fire as I used to do On the warm stone, Nor at the foot of your bed; no, all the night through I lie alone. But your kind thought has laid me less than six feet Outside your window where firelight so often plays, And where you sit to read--and I fear often grieving for me-- Every night your lamplight lies on my place. You, man and woman, live so long, it is hard To think of you ever dying A little dog would get tired, living so long. I hope than when you are lying Under the ground like me your lives will appear As good and joyful as mine. No, dear, that's too much hope: you are not so well cared for As I have been. And never have known the passionate undivided Fidelities that I knew. Your minds are perhaps too active, too many-sided. . . . But to me you were true. You were never masters, but friends. I was your friend. I loved you well, and was loved. Deep love endures To the end and far past the end. If this is my end, I am not lonely. I am not afraid. I am still yours. Robinson Jeffers, 1941 Haig, was buried outside the window (screen right) of Tor House, Jeffers' home in Carmel CA. I've visited the site and seen Haig's grave. I hope Tilda's memory is a blessing to you always. Hugs Bill Edited October 15, 2022 by Spy Car 8 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frances Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I’m so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted October 15, 2022 Share Posted October 15, 2022 I am so very very sorry. She has that sweet, intelligent look in her eyes, I can tell she was an amazing friend to you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toocrazy!! Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 My heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I'm so sorry. She was beautiful. ❤️ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loowit Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I am so sorry for your loss. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScoutTN Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 Oh, I am so sorry! She was so cute. I am glad you had such a great dog snd she had such a loving home. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bibiche Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I’m so sorry, Jenny. She was a beautiful dog. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I’m so sorry 😢 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Selkie Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 Hugs. I'm glad you had so many years together, but so sorry for your pain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ting Tang Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I'm so, so very sorry. Tilda was beautiful. My heart knows the hurt you are feeling right now, which never completely goes away, but it is clear she was so dearly loved and will always be. I wish we could have our pets forever. I hope your memories will be a blessing until you are able to meet again. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kristin0713 Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I'm so sorry. 😢 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vintage81 Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 So sorry for your loss 😔 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corbster98 Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 What a sweet relationship with your Matilda. I am so so sorry for your loss. My heart hurts just reading your post. Losing our best friends is one of life's hardest grievances. Hugs Jenny. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartlikealion Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 Oh @Jenny in Florida I'm so sorry to hear this. I know you were so stressed about her. I'm so happy that you stayed with her til the end. I know that the animals look for their person at the vet so I think that was the kindest thing you could for her. Hang in there. (hugs) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I'm so sorry for your loss. She was beautiful. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I am so sorry for your loss. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I’m so sorry. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
easypeasy Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 Oof. We went through this fairly recently and I'm still waiting for the hole in my heart to heal over. I'm so, so sorry. Some doggos just wriggle their way into our very DNA. They're hard to shake. ♥ I console myself with the knowledge that we cared for him and he managed to be happy up until close to the end, despite his illness. But, he was so loved and so cuddled and so adored by all of us in this house and remembering his happy doggo life puts a smile on my face when I'm feeling lonely without him. We also stayed with him and I am so, SO glad we did even though it was THE hardest thing we've ever done together as a family. {{Hugs}} to you. She was a beautiful girl. ♥ 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I'm so sorry @Jenny in Florida. Many hugs for you and yours 🤗🤗🤗 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
popmom Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I’m so, so sorry for your loss. She was clearly very much loved. It’s so painful though. My heart goes out to you and your family. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 Oh, I am so sorry! What a lucky pup to have had such a long life with you! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted October 16, 2022 Share Posted October 16, 2022 I am so, so sorry to hear this sad news. She has been your faithful and loving companion through so much. Sad day. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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