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Corraleno last won the day on July 16

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About Corraleno

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  1. That alone would make it a big fat NOPE for me. You will spend weeks with a toothbrush getting the poly out of the arches... and then comes sanding. Have you ever tried sanding anything with curved moldings? You'll need those sponge-type sanding blocks to get most of it, and then you'll be folding sandpaper and using the edge to try to get into the curved grooves. Times 34 doors.
  2. It's not about doing (or even helping with) the actual work, it's about helping someone with significant EF issues figure out how to manage the work. Example: DS texted me this afternoon saying he has 9 assignments due this week, and even though some aren't due until Fri/Sat/Sun, his team is traveling to a competition this weekend and they leave at 8:00 AM Friday, so all nine assignments have to be in by Thursday night. He has practices all morning every day, and classes in the afternoon. He completed two assignments yesterday (Monday), two still haven't been posted yet, two were supposed to be up yesterday but didn't get posted until this afternoon (Tues), and one of those is a very time-consuming project that requires use of a data set the prof accidentally deleted. He has severe ADHD and was totally overwhelmed trying to figure out how to get everything done when the only time he has available is between 4:00 PM and midnight for the next three days. So I helped him prioritize things and make a list of what to do 1st/2nd/3rd, etc., and what to leave till last because in a pinch he could probably do it in the hotel Friday night. If your student asked for help because he was feeling overwhelmed by a task his brain is not wired to handle well, would you really say "tough luck, figure it out yourself, and if you flunk a couple of assignments because you didn't know what to do, maybe you'll learn a lesson"? What lesson — don't be so ADHD? Drop out of college because clearly you're not cut out for it if you can't prioritize getting 9 assignments done in 3 evenings, when some of them have missing pieces and/or haven't even been posted yet? Deciding that there is some arbitrary age or grade cut-off, beyond which people with EF issues no longer deserve help, basically sets the upper limit of their education, career, and life, to the limits of their disability. Even though, with a little support, they may be capable of so much more. I really don't understand that.
  3. IMO struggling with EF issues due to ADHD is very different from someone who just procrastinates a lot because they can't be bothered or they'd rather play video games or whatever. Some kids with ADHD genuinely have no sense of time and really struggle to not only accurately estimate how long something will take, but also schedule their time in order to meet an upcoming deadline while also juggling lots of other tasks. Heck, there are millions of adults with ADHD who still struggle with that, no way would I expect a 6th grader with severe ADHD to be able to do that without a LOT of help. You really can't "tough love" the ADHD out of someone. IMO, letting kids fail because of ADHD just teaches them that their brains are broken and they'll always be failures. 😥 I'm honestly ok with providing help and scaffolding as long as necessary. DS is a sophomore in college and I still help him with things like scheduling and pacing and reminders. He's incredibly smart and gets high As on every assignment — as long as sees it's on his schedule and remembers to do it. Letting him get Cs, that do not remotely reflect what he's capable of, to punish him for the way his brain works, would not do anything but demoralize and destroy him.
  4. Yeah, they're... something else. When DS was born, they happened to be at a party in the same city as the hospital (which was about 2 hours from their home) so they showed up at the hospital at the crack of dawn, having been up all night partying, dressed to the nines but totally disheveled, and reeking so much of alcohol and cigarettes I nearly gagged. And they were still half drunk and very loud so they made a major scene in the maternity ward (UK hospital, so open ward not private rooms), waking up DS and most of the other moms and babies. Luckily DS screamed as soon as MIL got near him so she decided she'd "wait to hold him some other time." I have so many crazy stories about them, and people rarely believe the stories until they meet them and then they're like "holy sh*t you weren't kidding!" 😂 I grew up in a pretty dysfunctional family, but my in-laws are on a whole other level!
  5. Took DS shoe shopping after a growth spurt when he was 9 or 10 and discovered his feet had grown THREE full sizes. I asked if his old shoes had been hurting his feet, and he said yes they hurt a lot. I asked why he didn't tell me, and he said it just never occurred to him to ask for new shoes. DD still calls me every time she fills out a form to ask what her middle name is. She was also shocked to discover (at the age of 11) that tuna is a fish and (at 13) that not all pigs are pink, and that even "pink" pigs actually have white hair not pink hair. She's seen real pigs in person at the state fair so I'm not sure how that misconception lasted so long! I once took DS to an expensive out-of-state sports camp, and when I dropped him off on Monday they asked why he'd missed Sunday. Apparently I had the dates wrong and he missed an entire day of a 1-week camp we'd paid a lot of money for. ☹️ When DS was a college freshman, he once woke me up at 4:30 AM asking how to get ice cubes out of a plastic ice cube tray. (Double fail since he apparently doesn't understand time zones either!) For serious parenting fails, though, no one beats my ex-inlaws: In the UK kindergarten starts at 4, and it apparently never occurred to either of them to tell a 4 yr old that he would be starting school soon, or even explain what "school" was or how it worked. So one day FIL just dropped him off at school with no explanation, and the poor kid assumed he must have done something terribly wrong and that's where he would be living from now on. 😥 He was shocked when his dad showed up at the end of the day, and also surprised when the whole routine was repeated the next day. He still thought for a long time that "school" was where kids were sent if they were bad and their parents didn't want to deal with them during the day. When I mentioned to MIL that DS was a very colicky baby who rarely slept more than 1-2 hours at a time, she told me to just add a little vodka to his formula and he'd be sure to sleep through the night. She said she did that with both of her kids and it worked great. FIL told me that the whole concept of "child proofing" a house was BS and kids needed to just learn what was off limits and what wasn't. Then he laughingly told me about the time MIL left her wine glass within reach of BIL's crib when he was a toddler and how he broke the glass and cut his hand and smeared blood all over the wall and nearly gave MIL a heart attack (har har har). And there was that hilarious time XH drank cleaning fluid as a toddler and that time BIL came downstairs after a party when he was 4 or 5 and went around drinking the dregs of everyone's drinks and chewing on cigarette butts. And they were fine, so that proves that this "child-proofing" crap is just stupid!
  6. YMMV, but in my experience, removing multiple layers of poly is a serious PITA. Brush on thick (gel) stripper, wait, scrape off as much as you can with a putty knife, reapply stripper and try to work the rest off with steel wool, and then if you have trim/moulding with nooks and crannies, repeat a third time with a toothbrush to get it all out, wash it off, sand it all down, then restain the color you want. Repeat for every cabinet door and drawer front and then the frames and then replace all the hardware. I stripped some large oak bookcases that had a lot of panels and moulding and it was a nightmare. And TBH I finally gave up on one of the bookcases after the 4th or 5th round of stripper and decided to just go with a distressed/shabby chic look on that one. I may eventually paint it. IMO doing an entire kitchen would a huge, exhausting job. Do you have a heated garage or workshop where you can work during the winter? Can you live with the kitchen looking a mess if it takes you several months? Personally I would just order new doors and start over. You'll have a much better result in the end, and you'll save yourself a huge amount of hassle and misery.
  7. DD has black hair and I've bleached & dyed it for her multiple times. I stay away from the roots, and either just do streaks or the last few inches (she has long hair). Usually she goes for pink/red/burgundy colors so I only have to strip it back to a light orange rather than almost white, but I have also occasionally taken it down to pale yellow (I will only do the ends if we go that light, because it does fry the hair). Bleaching to a light orangey color is not that damaging if you use a good after-color conditioner, and if you only do the tips you can cut it all off in a few months before it looks too damaged and the color is too faded (if you're also dying it). Personally I would not pay a salon to just bleach the tips on a teen boy's hair. To DIY it, if you have a Sally's near you, you can just ask the salesperson what they recommend. If not, you can usually get basic bleaching kits (brands like Splat or Manic Panic) from Walmart or Target. A really easy way to do the tips on short spiky hair is to blow dry the hair so it sticks straight up all over (use hairspray at the roots if you need to). Then mix up the bleach, put gloves on your hands, scoop some bleach paste in your hands and pat them together, then lightly pat/rub the bleach on the ends of the hair. Let it sit the suggested amount of time, and wash out. If you're adding another color, after the bleach is washed out, blow dry again and repeat the process with the color. Here's a photo of streaks I did in DD's hair a couple of years ago — the effect is called "oil slick" and it looks great (almost iridescent in sunlight) on black hair. It's basically streaks bleached and then dyed various shades of green, blue, purple, and pink. The dyes I used are Pravana ChromaSilk Vivids.
  8. I think the taxes & fees must be included in the price, because I just placed the order and it was a flat $300 for the service plus $5 for the SIM card, with no additional fees or monthly charges. I just hope AT&T's coverage is better than Sprint's — I only had 1 bar this morning and couldn't even make a phone call!
  9. I currently use Ting, but it's on the Sprint network and coverage sucks here, plus their pricing is no longer competitive. AT&T Prepaid (which used to be GoPhone) has a current offer for $300/yr ($25/mo) for unlimited T&T plus 8 gb data per month, which is a way better deal than Ting. Before I order a new sim, though, I wanted to ask if anyone else uses them/likes them/hates them/etc.? TIA!
  10. About 100 people, traveling in a caravan of 18 cars, have left Mexico and are now in Arizona, heading for Phoenix and Tucson. Apparently more are planning to leave soon. Story here.
  11. WOW, that is quite a story! So it was clearly a targeted hit and not mistaken identity. I wonder if a lot of the families in the various colonies down there will decide to move back to the US after this. Obviously it would be hard to leave behind the homes and schools and farms they've built there over the last century, but I can't imagine trying to live like that, knowing your entire family could be massacred at any random moment. 😥
  12. DS is also at a huge state university, but with the exception of long waits to use the health center, he has not had any of the other issues you describe. His classes are not that large — I think his largest has been ~40 and his smallest (so far) is 5. His professors all know his name and, with the exception of one (who I think was a TA or PostDoc), they have been very helpful and responsive, even replying to emails late at night and on weekends. His advisor knows him pretty well and has been really flexible about meeting him whenever he needs to see her, because the athletic department requires her to sign off on extra paperwork but his schedule makes it impossible for him to see her during her regular office hours. DS is not a STEM major though — I think that's where size may make a bigger difference. No weed-out classes, and he was able to jump into 300 & 400 level courses in his major even as a freshman. I think for majors where the degree requirements are pretty standard everywhere (like engineering or nursing), then a small school may have advantages, especially if the student can be admitted directly to the major and skip the weed-outs. But for a regular Arts & Sciences kid, a large university with lots of professors and a wide choice of courses in the chosen major (or a wide choice of majors for undecided kids) may be a better deal. I attended a small LAC as an undergrad, with only 2 profs in my major, so my course choices were pretty much limited to whichever 1 or 2 courses they were teaching that semester that I hadn't already taken, which was definitely less than ideal. Then I went to UCLA for grad school and had so many choices of courses to take, professors to work with, relevant research projects to get involved with, etc. On the one hand I was thinking how amazing it would have been to have access to all of that as an undergrad, but in reality I was a super flakey 17 yr old when I started college, so I think a small LAC with minimal bureaucracy (because I changed my major umpteen times and was always dropping and adding courses, forgetting to sign scholarship paperwork, etc.) was probably better for me. :P
  13. There should be arrows in the upper right corner of each entry that you can use to move the activities up or down on your list. Are those arrows missing? Or is the app reordering your activities even after you move them? I'll see if I can get back into DS's old application and take a picture. ETA: See the up & down arrows in the upper right? Those still work for me to change the order.
  14. The lower percentages in math and science are partly an artifact of the way ACT calculates the "college readiness" benchmarks. Their benchmark score for English is only 18, and since the average score is 20, it's not surprising that more than 50% of students meet that benchmark. The benchmark for math and reading is set at 22, and for science it's 23, so fewer students meet those. The sections that require higher scores for "readiness" are also the ones where intensive prep and knowing specific test-taking strategies make the most difference, so a student who takes the ACT cold with no prep could score below the benchmarks, and then after a few months of intensive prep could score well above them — even though test prep does not in any way make a student "better prepared" for college. What those benchmarks may really be measuring is whether the student had parents who could afford to pay for a prep class and multiple test dates, not whether the student is actually capable of doing college level work. The first time DS took the ACT, he was super nervous and had zero prep. He did really well in English and reasonably well in math, but only scored 24 in Reading (barely above the 22 benchmark) and 23 in Science (the bare minimum). They are the last two sections, he was totally exhausted, he didn't pace himself, and he didn't know any test-taking strategies. After a few months with Prep Scholar he raised his Reading score from 24 to 36 and his Science score from 23 to 33. The idea that a few months of a paid prep service made him far more "prepared" for college is beyond absurd — it's insulting.
  15. The SpEd coordinator for our district said the same thing to me. She also said to just get DS an electronic spell checker ("dyslexics never learn to spell right so don't waste your time teaching spelling"), that he could just turn in "mind map diagrams" instead of writing essays and papers, and that he would be exempt from foreign language requirements because foreign language is "impossible" for dyslexics. This is a kid who went on to excel in Greek and Latin, with gold medals and perfect scores on the NLE & NGE, scored perfect 36s in English & Reading on the ACT, and is now a linguistics major who's gotten high As on every college paper he's written. It breaks my heart to think about what happens to kids whose parents believe the bullshit the idiot SpEd coordinator tells them and who leave their kids in PS with those absurdly low expectations.
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