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About Innisfree

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  1. First, mom and dad are both idiots, and while ianal, I'd think guilty of negligent homicide, coupled with something related to improper use of their medical licenses. Both should absolutely lose those licenses and be prosecuted for this. Second, now that the daughter I'm sure they loved in spite of their idiocy has died, I imagine they have an enormous amount of psychological capital invested in the idea that they were right. The more they hurt, the harder they have to defend their ideas and actions. I mean, other than extraordinary self-deception, how could anyone live with themselves at this point? So, I'd expect a lot of this framing from the parents.
  2. I'm so very sorry. That is rotten beyond words.
  3. I do have a significant reservation about traveling this year, even the way we're doing it. This didn't occur to me until after we made our reservation, though, so we're committed at this point. And that's the problem. Everyone in the family wants to go *so much.* And the reservation is made, so we'll lose money if we cancel. But: what if someone came down with a low-grade, niggling sort of symptom or two, before the trip? Nothing major, nothing that would even spur us to get tested ordinarily, just the stuff that lets Covid get mistaken for allergies and fly under the radar. I'm concerned that fear of missing the trip creates an incentive to unconsciously ignore small symptoms and go ahead, when we should be staying home. Not that I'm aware of anyone doing that; it just creates the incentive. We've talked about it. All the other families traveling will be subject to the same, totally unconscious incentive. So, more motivation not to relax my guard while we're away. And, I mean, that stinks, because relaxing is the whole idea.
  4. This is pretty much how it's worked for us. My mother had basically helped raise my (older) cousins, who developed their own special name for her. It was a variant of her first name. She decided she wanted our kids to call her that: it was what young extended family members had called her for decades. So, it was easy for dh to call her that too, without using either her actual first name or "Mom". Like Maize, I ended up mostly calling her that also. The same pattern existed in my own childhood. All the grandkids used a special, individual name for each of my mother's parents. So, my father used the same names for his MIL and FIL that the kids did, and so did their other SIL. I never had to call my MIL or FIL anything in particular, since one died before dh and I were married and the other shortly after. Neither had ever expressed a preference, and we didn't see them very often or for very long, so that just never got resolved. I'll be fine having SILs call me anything that makes them feel comfortable.
  5. I can tell you what we're doing. Throughout this pandemic, I've been extremely cautious. Our plans will introduce a small element of risk, but I think they're pretty safe. Like you, we need decent mattresses and air conditioning. We're going to a state park where we've been many times over the years, which has comfortable, though not luxurious, cabins. The park is two hours from our home, so no stops along the way. We're taking our food, sheets, and towels. The cabins are being left empty for a day between visitors, in order to protect both the cleaning staff and the next visitors. So, if the Jones family departs Saturday at 10 am, cleaners don't enter until Sunday at 10 am. We're planning to arrive as late as possible that day to check in, to maximize the time between the cleaners and us. We'll go in, open up to let air through, and wipe surfaces first, and we're taking an air filter with a UV light to run. I've never seen these beaches crowded. I hope that's still true this year, but if they get too busy, we'll hike instead. Numbers on the beach are supposed to be restricted in any case. We always tend to return to our own cabin for the restroom. We can read, play games, eat tasty food. At some point we'll probably get takeout at a local restaurant. I'm planning to take some drives to check out some historic buildings, but we won't be going in museums this trip. Just outside, distanced walking, beaches and a drive or two. Putting this together is a pain. I'm tired of planning and organizing and cooking. But we'll have fun there, and it'll be worthwhile. We're all looking forward to a change of scenery.
  6. Ohh! Yes, almonds. I forgot we do often add almonds to ours too. Going back to edit.
  7. Shredded chicken (I use a 2 1/2lb -3lb bag of frozen chicken breasts, thawed and cooked) Halved or quartered seedless grapes, preferably red (raisins also work in a pinch): I dunno, a few big handfuls? Maybe 2 cups chopped? Maybe 3? Slivered almonds Mayonnaise 2 to 2 1/2 tsp curry powder (or to taste) Salt to taste Our family demolishes this rapidly.
  8. 😮😕?!??? Guess I should be grateful not to have heard some of these ideas. This is disturbing. Editing to add the quote below was from MissLemon's post. The Glitch got me. These seem like very...defensive...postures. In isolation, some seem reasonable and healthy, like growing your own food. But together, you're right, they suggest people are defining themselves in opposition to mainstream society. Increasingly, I do not like this moment in history. It feels like the center is not holding.
  9. So, I think a big part of this (and I think you know this, but the general public may not) is that we're watching science as it happens. It isn't all clear and settled yet, but because of the urgency, we're seeing bits and pieces of the process which ordinarily play out slowly through time, and lots of journal articles, and conferences, before the public is really aware of the issue at all. Consensus doesn't happen right away. Studies from different places contribute to an understanding which slowly emerges, but that's just how the process works. There's often contradictory information along the way. The CDC is another issue. I think politics are entering into its pronouncements in a way which is extremely destructive, precisely because the trust people place in institutions is limited and fragile. It's bad enough having science emerge slowly and contradictorily (and normally, but at a time of importance and high visibility), without having the governmental body responsible for public health pronouncements having to trim their sails to the political winds.
  10. The degree of "maturity" might make a difference , as well as the details of the surgery. I wish my memory were clearer.
  11. Agreeing. It sounds like a distrust, not just of politicians, but of established authority in general. Not sure what we do about that. ETA that the "certain politician" seems to have gained credibility with that crowd partly because he set himself up as the one confronting and rebelling against the establishment.
  12. For my father, the whole tube came out. I don't remember exactly how urgent getting it back in was: not a "call the ambulance" scenario, but certainly a "do it today" scenario. Probably the sooner the better: I can't remember if there's a way to prevent the formula from leaking into the abdominal cavity if the tube comes out. I'd check with your ds's doctors about the degree of urgency.
  13. Yeah, you're right!😄 I was thinking more that the article starts out with the Justinian code, and goes through 9/11; but it's still actually short.
  14. No, he only had the j tube. Having a way to vent the acid and bile would be a huge quality of life improvement. I'm so glad you have that option.
  15. J tube was all I ever heard. Radiology was certainly supposed to be involved, but he was convinced he could do it. I had serious concerns, but was not in a position to override his actions. Editing to add I just looked up gj tubes, and his was a j tube.
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