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Storygirl

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Storygirl last won the day on April 11 2019

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  1. The 100 Year Old Man..... I had a little family book club with my sister, aunt, cousin, etc., and I suggested that book without reading it, because I had seen so many posts of people who loved it. And I hated it. A giant slog, and I only made it halfway through before giving up. We ended up never meeting for that session, so I didn't have to confess that I hadn't finished it. Just my opinion, but I would pick something different. Note -- there are very few books that I've read in my life that I have not been able to make myself finish, even if I didn't care much for them. Maybe two o
  2. My grandmother had five grandchildren. She opened a CD with $5000 and designated it "payable upon death" with each of the five of us receiving $1,000. The bank simply wrote checks to the beneficiaries after she died, and then closed the account. My grandmother lived very simply on a fixed income, and we didn't expect any inheritance, and this was a big surprise. The rest of her estate would have been minimal, and I expect she left a similar token amount to my dad and my aunt. In the situation you describe, you could suggest that your mom talk to her bank about the possibility of putting f
  3. I am no expert. But we attended Alistair Begg's church for 20 years, and he is a prominent teacher who aligns with Reformed theology (mentioned by another poster earlier in this thread). Believer baptism is that church's position. In fact, I was baptized in the Methodist church as an infant, and to become a member, I had to choose to be baptized again (I was willing and in fact eager). As far as I can remember, Alistair never categorized himself to the congregation as a Calvinist or Reformed, etc., but would just teach doctrine through exegetical preaching. The congregation would recite a
  4. I admit that I will read cleaning and decluttering books and will watch shows, and I will feel inspired but still not do any of the work in my own home, because I find it overwhelming. But I will mention that the Clutterbug lady has a show on HGTV that is running new episodes now, called Hot Mess House. This is the second season. The first season ran during the time when she couldn't enter anyone's home, due to Covid, so she was giving advice online. Now she is going to people's houses. I will just say that the first episode of the second season is inspiring. If those families could clean
  5. I struggle a lot with clutter, too. I obviously can't see the whole room in your photo, but I would not get rid of the coffee table (I realize that you won't and am just giving you some agreement on that). Buy a plant -- artificial, if you will kill a real one -- and put it on the table. Yes, some things will still collect there, but not as many. Clean the table off religiously once or twice a day and enjoy having that one spot clean. Then move on to another area and improve that. I'll be honest and say that I try this technique, and still things pile up. And I think that the solution is
  6. It may be easier and less expensive to put carpet in that one bedroom and just cover up the wood floor. I'm assuming you are okay with carpet, in general, since you have it in the hallway.
  7. One of my kids is regularly snippy with me and always has been. Eye rolling, interrupting, saying, "I KNOW," before I finish speaking, muttering angry things under the breath. She definitely is not on the spectrum but does have a new ADHD diagnosis. I attribute much of it to impulsivity, which can be part of ADHD for some. It's definitely not an age related thing for her, because she was like this always, though it has intensified some during the teen years. It never helps things when I ask her to repeat herself in a nicer tone -- she can't do it and will get more irritated, instead. The
  8. The oral surgeon should give advice, as well. DD19 had hers out at 16, and it took longer than we expected for her to fully recover. She had them out on a Thursday, I think (maybe Friday), and she didn't go back to school until the next Wednesday. I had to insist that she try to go, and she called and had me bring her back home that day. It was about a week until she felt back to normal. We were surprised by that. The oral surgeon said to expect about four days -- with the procedure on Thursday, most people can go back to school or work on Monday. But it just took DD longer. Some people b
  9. We adopted our first when I was 32, but I never made a decision to wait until that age for children. I married at 29, and then we had a time of figuring out what to do about infertility, and then a lengthy adoption process. It's just how life unfolded for me. I actually hoped to get married right out of college, and have kids earlier, but my college boyfriend and I broke up, so plan A went by the wayside. My siblings both became grandparents in their mid to late 40s, and I am a little envious of that, because they get to spend loads of time with grandchildren while they are still young an
  10. You probably know, but dementia has phases. She will change. In fact, if she lives long enough with this, she will likely lose her feeling of connection to her husband and not recognize who he is. So the clingy behavior or need to control will not last. Oh, it may last for a good amount of time. But it will change. In some ways, dropping to a lower level of cognitive ability offers some relief from challenges, though new challenges arise. So what is not possible now may be possible in the time to come. Hugs
  11. I don't think you gain anything by not keeping your husband informed. So I would tell him your concerns. It's going to be extremely hard, but your father in law is going to have to come around to accepting that his wife is not capable of making many decisions for herself any more. He will have to do many things that displease her, and accept that the displeasure can't be avoided, but that safety must be assured. I know that you realize this, and that you can't control your father in law's thoughts. You will just need to gently keep repeating what is true -- MIL is no longer capable o
  12. We lost both Mom and MIL over this winter, and both had dementia. Mom, as I mentioned before, was an Alzheimer's long hauler, as her mother was, before her (we cared for my grandmother in our home for years when I was a teen). MIL declined over the past five years after a few health issues, and she declined particularly in the last year and a half of her life. This happened to correspond with the pandemic, so DH and I were not able to help FIL much. We also live hours away. DH's sister did help her parents a lot, and FIL's sister came over once a week, I think, to cook for them and give F
  13. I'm sorry. I know it's not easy. At all. I think you are so good hearted to offer to sit with your MIL so often, but I agree that getting help sooner, rather than later, is a better option. If you make yourself endlessly available, you risk being unable to meet your own immediate family's needs, and it makes it easier for FIL to put off the decision to hire help. No matter how much help he brings in, there will always be ways for you to help, too, and I am not saying that you should back away. Just that they need more help than you can reasonably offer, since you are the only non-working adult
  14. We have a window shaped like that in DD's bedroom. The top has a half moon shaped shade, and then a regular set of wooden plantation blinds on the bottom. The top shade can be opened or closed, so the light is not blocked, unless you want it to be. The window coverings were in place when we bought the house, so I don't know where they got them. But you can call a window blind company, and they can figure it out for you. Because the window is in a niche, I personally would not add curtains but would just put blinds on both windows.
  15. I hope you figure out a plan that will work well for you. To work as a counselor with either a psychology or social work degree, you would need to do years of graduate work after the bachelor's degree. If you are ready for that kind of commitment to academic training, it is something that you could pursue. If you wanted to have your own independent office, you would also need some background in business. You seem to have a heart for wanting to help others. Maybe look at what kind of jobs are available in your local medical community, to give you more ideas about what you might train
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