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PeterPan last won the day on November 22 2013

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About PeterPan

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  1. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    Yup, he's actually trying really hard to be good, but she's not engaging him. She isn't addressing the cognitive and is sort of emotionally distant. She doesn't give feedback or instructions during sensory, slouches during the handwriting, and is just sort of losing control. She was too demanding before, so I think maybe she swung the other way. So he went from refusing to go to being ok with going (as it's no longer dreadful) but leaving yellow zone and dysregulated. And that sorta defeats the purpose if they leave worse than when they came. No good carryover, total, total flop. But it kills me, because I wanted it to go well and gave it a long time trying. And they frame it like I should give feedback that makes it better, and I'm like hello train your people.
  2. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    That may be what I'm seeing, a lack of experience with AUTISM. Her work was focused on visual processing previously and that's what her phd is in. I think she worked with a lot of more typical kids and isn't connecting with autism. She doesn't seem to engage, even when she tries.
  3. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    Actually, that's a total aside, but I've been trying to decide if I have some kind of bias against young therapists. A lot of these OTs are young, and if they're young and unmarried, they don't have gravitas. They also don't have that experience with kids and don't get that a parent is gonna be like a bengal tiger fighting for the best. But they also don't have that confidence of I'm gonna say it and I mean it and it's gonna go that way. The kid picks up on that. And it's not bossiness either, just sort of congenial authority. So anyways, it makes it sticky, because young therapists want to be employed too, lol.
  4. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    It is the hardest profession to pin down and feel confident like you're using evidence-based practices and on a sensible path, that's for sure. I've got an OT trying to do handwriting worksheets and compliance drills and calling it therapy. She makes him dizzy and headachy and yellow zone, so he goes into his next therapy person THROWING things, and they're like oh it will come with time. I mean, total buffoonery and idiots. And when I confront it, they're like well did you tell her what you want? I'm thinking, hello, actually be trained to do your job. Know Zones, know how to work with autism. It was novel to her that she might even use a visual schedule!!!!!!!!! But I'm a terrible parent if I fire her. That's in a school btw. You want lowest common denominator therapy, demotivated therapists, oh my. I mean, some are fine, but I'm about to get SO CYNICAL that it's mind-boggling. They don't lose their jobs if they're incompetent. They're used to kids showing up and leaving and the parents having NO CLUE if real progress is being made. Everything is hidden and kids just check time and people get paid, irrespective of results. School has some really good things it does!!! It totally does a disservice to my ds if I hide my head in the sand about that. And that's something the op will think about with time. I wasn't doing that initially. That was like after a year I went ok, what would school do better? If I admit that, then I admit our holes and can do better. And sometimes I go ok those skills were good and I want him to hit them other ways. There's a lot of suboptimal, shove them through, in the school system. There are people trying to treat, but the cut-offs, the amount of therapy they can get, the lack of customization, there are significant issues. My ds is, I think, moving out of the try hard with therapy window and into the oh well it wasn't gonna come anyway stage. And that kinda sucks, because as a parent we might feel a bit more aggressively about some things. The best innovations right now, like in OT with the new Interoception stuff, are CUTTING EDGE! These people aren't even trained to do it yet!!! It will take years upon years to trickle this through the system, and I need it for my ds NOW and it's pivotal for him NOW. So me, I'm thinking this weekend about what the value was of one provider, one set-up, and whether I need that *in addition* to xyz other good thing. It's hard stuff. But I think put your energy into productive stuff, real questions.
  5. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    It's ok to feel snarky and angry!! You went to them for help and they're not giving it. PS. Sounds like the shower was a success, because now you know how you feel. You're gonna feel a lot of things. It's how you're developing your shoe leather thick hide. You're gonna be a tiger.
  6. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    Bingo. And it can be kind of helpful to dig in and figure out why you aren't doing that. Like me, I let people target me with their comments because I WISH, so wish, that I could just hand him over and go boom that got done by professionals and it's right. Well sorry, not reality for ds. But I sort of nurse that quiet dream and open myself up to their comments. So polite assertiveness is also your armor of I may not be perfect but we're fine for now. And I agree that right after you get a diagnosis is NOT the time to make sweeping, major changes. You would spend untold hours fighting in an IEP process. You start by building a team, finding your major issues, then deciding what would be pivotal and who should tackle what. I keep people for my inner circle that I trust to say things straight. Like I have a behaviorist who's a social worker, and if she thinks we're not on track, she's gonna SAY so. So I run things by her, use her as a scapegoat, let her be backup for my brain. Our behaviorist says to remember that school is there for seasons. Is this a season when it's a good choice? It's ok to make that choice! But if this is not a season when you need that choice (things are going fine, the household's needs are all being met, etc.), then what gives? Then it's just opinions and people will have opinions out the wazoo. The most valuable opinions will be from your team members who are with him a significant amount who also know the long-term progression of autism at his IQ and support level to know where this is going and whether you're on track.
  7. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    No there is legit stuff like PANDAS, etc. that is connected to autism behaviors after an illness. It's a totally legit question. Then don't do the blood draw. You could meet the practitioner first and decide whether you even want what she's offering. It doesn't sound like your doc office gets autism. It's not as easy as just oh let's go draw blood. It's getting them in the car, will they ever do it again, on and on. There better be some STRONG REASON to go through that, because you're gonna use a lot of capital getting there.
  8. Have you seen the amazon STEM club? Another way to suck your money.
  9. PeterPan

    and the asd saga continues...

    That's pretty non-traditional to start with. Who is this person?? I mean, I did chelation, had my amalgams out, all that, so I'm kind of on board with people doing things differently. I'm kind of unclear on the timeline here, but it's not "curing autism" to want to have medical problems explained and to connect dots. It's a legit question why he had those symptoms and whether they're connected to current symptoms. You could have both things going on, but there's no way to say autism caused the bells palsy, right? Therefore he AT LEAST has a medical problem. Was that medical problem considered dealt with and cured/resolved when you went for the psych eval?? And was the psych aware of the medical history? I think at least take a deep breath. Any doc who says to put him in the ps every time you walk in the door is at least not being helpful. She has clearly riled you up. Sometimes these people are seeing things they aren't explaining, and sometimes they're just related to donkeys. Personally, I'd suggest you put everything she said aside and take a LONG WALK this weekend and steam and shower, drive somewhere nice, eat out by yourself or with someone you like, indulge in three pieces of cheesecake... When I can't get back to my peaceful self and hear my own mind and voice for the answers, that's sometimes what I need to do, long walks, hot showers... This actually seems like a really sensible referral!! There's a lot of data about good results with np's who specialize in psychiatric. That's not all bad. Now what IS crummy is if she isn't an autism specialist and she's seeing just this one angle, like just the anxiety or just the psychiatric. Honestly, if you think it's autism, it makes a lot more sense to look for answers in the autism community. They already know the ropes on how things connect and what to look for. It's not like you have to invent things here. Like I have my ds in for counseling right now, and where *I* thought they would work on xyz, the actual big thing they work on every week is self-advocacy, go figure. Like why reinvent the wheel here. Go to the autism community for autism-related problems. But this bells-palsy and whether it's fully treated or whether it needs a referral, I don't know. Lyme is a tricky, controversial thing. You can go to the CHAT board and post about Lyme and get the scoop from ladies. I'd be asking other questions (just me, not knowing much), like why not a referral to a neurologist, why not genetics, etc. That seems like a really significant thing that happened and it needs to be explained and completely treated. The other question to ask about this np is whether she's trying to do counseling or meds. Do you want meds? You want genetics? For blood tests, they're wanting liver? What are they looking for, kwim? They can test lithium levels and some b-vitamins. Or they've got something else they're looking at? What I find, and this is just my word of peace to you, is that EVERY PRACTITIONER I call has some kind of answer. I was on the phone with an OT today, and she's like oh man you would not BELIEVE the miracle cure that is Neurovascular Integration Therapy!! She's like oh I never work with anyone without doing it, so foundational, so amazing. I'm looking into this, and I'm like woman you're an idiot. And whether it's behaviorists or SLPs or the social thinking people or the biomedical docs or OTs or whatever, they all have their gig and how valuable they think their stuff is. You could approach this SO MANY ways. The trick then is to TRIAGE and decide what is most important and what YOU think is pivotal. Sometimes you might find someone to help you, like maybe a behaviorist, but ultimately YOU as the PARENT are going to decide the triage order on these options. So don't let anyone screw with your head. Stop, get quiet in yourself, and think about how to triage and what needs to be triaged first. Is it language or interceptive awareness or some medical issues or food allergies or that ABA level behavior or... What would make the BIGGEST difference right now or be pivotal and unlock other areas to make other areas work better? And then, if you have someone you trust, you could ask them what THEY think is pivotal. They might have a different take, which can be interesting to challenge yourself with. Like maybe others look at my ds and think compliance is a pivotal issue. The psych thinks self-advocacy is pivotal. Everyone has an opinion. You can pick what is important and pivotal and pick what to de-emphasize or wait on. And usually what happens, when parents do that, is it's just different paths, different journeys. It's not usually wrong or ruinous. It's usually more like someone has to drive the plan and this is my plan and I'm the driver of it and I'm not gonna be confused about it. You drive. Your kid is your wingman. Everybody else just has opinions.
  10. PeterPan

    Bible: WTM Style Binder

    What you might do is try reading and notebooking for yourself this way for a week so you can work out the kinks and see what you find edifying. I think it will really depend on the ages of the kids. I know over the years with my dd we would have focuses, like maybe for a time going through a book on the names of God or through a book on doctrines, etc. So if you had the intention to read through the Bible multiple times over the years, then you might like to have a theme for the year. That would be in the definitely gets done camp, lol. I definitely don't want to say this can't get done, but it would take a lot of time and might be more than 8/6 yos are wanting to do. I've done some reading from the Bible straight with my ds, who admittedly has language issues but is also quite bright. We read the NIrV when we do that to make sure he *understands* it. If you're coming from Egermeier, maybe you'll have an inbetween stage like that? Or consider reading the Vos children's story Bible next. It's a step up, both in language complexity and with the cause/effect and making connections. Does TMTM have you doing catechism? I couldn't remember. Right now I find myself doing a lot with maps with ds, so I'm with you that this is a great age to start bringing those in! It's sort of concrete, something they're ready to understand, and it makes a lot of connections. If you had say just a mapping focus for the year, you could print out blank maps or pretty colored maps or put maps on the walls for your reference. I LOVE reference maps like them and like to just look at them and ponder. Then you could make headings for cities under the mapping tab in your notebooks and with each new major place make a heading and what happened there. Then you'd start to see the overlap! Like you realize I've read the Bible how many times and I never connected that where Lazarus was raised was the same place as where the walls fell, Jericho! Or that Jericho was close to the Jordan? I had forgotten! So how fascinating and how much better a mental picture. And I think that's why I've been doing mapping with ds, because he's ready to ponder what that really meant, what that life was like, what it means when it says they WALKED somewhere. I think culture is really fair game at this age too, and I'm not sure if that's a notebooking thing or a read a cultural handbook or what. I've been using the Illustrated Family Bible Stories that TOG used to recommend (do they still?), and it's surprisingly wonderful. It has just enough cultural and geographical information in the sidebars to intrigue ds and pull him in, and then you have a straight but fresh telling of the story. My ds is really in the "I've heard this before and I'm bored" camp, because he has this crazy propensity to MEMORIZE everything he hears. He's been enjoying it and finding it fresh. Are you going to have them listen to you read aloud or are they going to read for themselves? The reading level of most translations is pretty high.Bible Translation Reading Levels - Christianbook.com There are kids who do this and kids who don't. My super high ACT, always 4-6 grade levels above reading level kid I think was still reading an NIrV in 3rd grade. The jump is HUGE. And I can tell you that when *I* read aloud to my ds, one chapter of Scripture usually takes us 20+ minutes. Or at least it feels that long, lol. By the time we read, pause, discuss, pause, it usually is quite a while. And that's reading an NIrV that is pretty accessible! So to get through 3 chapters a day (what it takes to read in a year) isn't accessible for him. It just isn't. It would take us an hour, let alone the notebooking. For my dd, I think I tried plans like that, having her read for herself, and then she just had her own preferences. They also start to have those opinions, lol. Have you looked at the Greenleaf Guides? They might give you a streamlined way to get where you're going. Or have you looked at the VP Bible curriculum? It might give you some structure to get where you're going without getting stuck in the weeds of great intentions. You could cover it at a faster clip if you wanted. They're going to pull out a lot of those basics like lists, etc. and have snazzy worksheets you could throw in a notebook. I'm looking through some of the things y'all are highlighting. For vocabulary, we're hitting that as we read the Illustrated Family Bible Stories. For us, having less reading lets us focus more on the culture and vocabulary. We're probably spending our time half and half right now. Not really, but seemingly. We're giving a lot of time to that culture, the vocab, the visual picture. It's really very engaging, and having *less* material at this age sometimes lets you do that. For things like themes, outlines, etc., have you ever taken a survey course? I went to a Christian college and my dd is now at one, and it's a really valuable thing! Like I'm not dissuading you at all and saying no don't do that. I'm just connecting your hunger for this and saying wow it's very good and did you know there are resources for this? Like instead of assembling their own (or you going through it inductively), maybe you'd like a reference like that? This isn't the only book like that, but here's one to get you started. Survey of the Old Testament and then here's a grad level text of a similar type An Introduction to the Old Testament: Second Edition I think the ESV has a youth study Bible with notes now. The fonts are probably crazy small, but maybe it doesn't bother kids? They're also making these notebooking Bibles. Have you seen them? They have thicker paper and lines to write in the margins. They're very affordable. I think your notebooking idea is sharp too. I'm just suggesting maybe some structure or ways to focus so that it definitely gets done. Have you seen Big Book of Bible Facts and Fun (Big Books) ? Our library had it along with a ton of other Gospel Light reproducible books. Actually, not to blow your mind, but it has the pages like you're wanting, so they could just read the fact page on animals or clothing or occupations or whatever and then color. It includes a timeline, fact cards for each book of the Bible, etc. That would be crazy age-appropriate. They have a really amazing glossary in the back too. Like I don't know how you want to use it, but it has a lot of potential. It could be *your* reference, or you could use the content to create games, etc. You could play hangman with the Bible vocabulary, etc. They have another book The Big Book of Bible Skills (Big Books) That I'm crazy for right now. It has those same Bible book cards and tons of games, worksheets for mapping, etc. Again, our library had it. Ok, I was going to try to find you one of the books on the names of Christ like we used with dd. That was more like maybe junior high. By high school I had her reading commentaries. I think I picked Warren Wiersbe at that early high school stage, because they were positive, uplifting, cheap, easy to get through. Anyways, I was trying to find that other book and came across this!! Frances Havergal was of course a famous hymnwriter, and her stuff is profoundly beautiful. What a gem! So here's a book that has all these names compiled as little devotionals for young ones. I don't know if my ds could understand it, so I'll have to look. I'm reading to him from Joni Erickson Tada's hymns series, and he enjoys them. He doesn't sing btw, so it's kind of a funny thing for me to be teaching him hymns. So the notebooking is good, but I tend to roll with the idiot-proof, open it and it gets done resources. And I think they could combine well with notebooking for a dc who can do that! Like they could draw/notebook while you read to them. It could be really nice! And the resources would combine to help you get more done.
  11. I find myself a lot less idealistic and a lot more "good enough" this time around (kids 10 years apart). I will say I think the answer for seemesew could be a cruise. Like seriously, sometimes that's the real problem, that we need some "take care of Mom" focus for a while. I had to do that recently. I went to the doctor and did what he said (thyroid meds), went to the optometrist and did what he said (two pairs of progressives, hey I'm 42!), scrounged some money and went to Florida and tromped Disney and sat on the beach a while... I got my spunk back and we're getting things done again. But if the cruise doesn't do it for you, then yeah go pick some get 'er done stuff and be at peace. Maybe just don't over-buy, especially in anything you know won't be a good fit. I dearly love the joyful components of the Timberdoodle cores, and I don't think I could live life without their inspiration. Well not really, but still. I would need those components, and then I'dd probably have to sub out anything that REALLY wasn't gonna work for LA and math. But for everything else, yeah Timberdoodle straight would be fine. For the math and LA, I'm skewed because I'm now dealing with a kid with 3 SLDs and have lost touch of reality, lol. But even then, I think I could probably get MUS to work if I HAD to. I like Texas's path with a box plus a part box. It will be more expensive, but it will solve that LA/math problem probably for you. Like me, I'd probably get a BJU half box (math, reading, science) and tag that on most of a Timberdoodle box and live a happy life.
  12. Temps for thyroid are not accurate, as body temp is affected by other things like parathyroid function. Did that years ago and it can really screw you up. For the hormone stuff, you might look into the Creighton method. This doc I'm seeing now has me doing it, and it's so obvious I'm flabbergasted nobody ever talks about it.
  13. Well we did the first lesson from the Exploding Dots and it was fun!! Definitely excited to see what connections he makes with this.
  14. Yes, there's a lot there! Your point on the terms is well-taken. I'm not sure I've noticed what RB calls them. I lost (mislaid, put somewhere, see my head hanging in shame) by coming of Overcoming Dyscalculia. That's what would have RB's take on the more advanced stuff, so it's killing me. I did some looking and I just need to find it, sigh. Yeah, one video I watched showed a girl at a whiteboard and she kept her dots pretty tidy. I don't know if it's so much that learning via patterns makes it hard or that the dyscalculia makes it easier to count by 1s than groups. Either way, it will be interesting. I prepped the first portion of the Tanton doc to play with him today, so we'll see. I think he may take to it. It's really just a stage though, definitely, not a long-term place to stay. I think if it makes it click super solidly WHY we're doing the dots at the top that would be good. And yeah, I'm gonna need to think about changing that term to group or something. You're right that trade means very little to him and that language matters in this. You're right he doesn't stay at blocks long for anything. The Lakeshore kits I got have blocks, and I thought he'd stay there longer. Oh no, the kits were coins. We did blocks a different way. Anyway, I was surprised how briefly he stayed there. And you're right that even though it seems very physical, they're abstract. Tanton suggests having them do the dots with buttons, etc., which would be sort of an in-between. But it's still a representation of a different concept, inherently abstract, good point. And I think that's why it's good, as an in-between step, just like the Lakeshore addition it is in-between blocks and solely written. I have no clue where I left my Overcoming, sigh. I have some piles (more shame, more head down) to deal with from when I've moved things around, changed things up. I don't know. I must be more diligent. In my slight defense, my thyroid has been giving me fits. I'm getting my spunk back, so I need to tell myself to get stuff done.
  15. Here, I'll try to attach some things, don't know if they'll interest you. Some of what I did is lost because it was so far back it was on my old computer (pc). The swankiest one that says January is from 8th grade I think, but looking through my files I seem to have rotated formats even with seasons. Definitely by junior high like that we were using the most complex forms, but you could bring them in younger. Sometimes I'd decorate them for the seasons, like changing the font colors to be eastery, etc. I just copied over them each week, editing the file and saving them, so I don't have them. One of those was from the dark days, so that was cracking me up. It's a paired schedule I had made with ds' plan (as he really needed a plan!!) and dd's. I needed to see that for MYSELF to realize ok this is where I'm going to be, this is what's humanly realistic. Then I had to tell her ok we'll meet at these times, set your alarms. It kinda sucked to reduce her education to that, sigh. She survived. Might need counseling, haha, but they survive. My point is look at what the tech can do for you and then work backwards. If there's ADHD (60% comorbid with dyslexia, common on its own anyway), then they need structure to get more done. So I changed the style of the lists around to fit our season, but we always needed that high structure. Not high rigidity, just high structure, clear expectations, a plan, a way to know what to do if we wanted to change things. A loop is structure but kind of different, because the expectation is different. I was saying the expectation is get these things done, and the loop says the expectation is be here working. So you can think through your expectations. And maybe that's why I'm not hyper about lists with ds, because I'm more about him working with me enough hours per day than I am what we're working on. He's not developmentally ready to be tied to a list, because he's not that flexible. Maybe a little, maybe with babysteps. But by 10/11, a more typical dc probably is ready. You'll also see I tried to use my lists to maybe encapsulate choices and grand ideas. Like sometimes I just wanted to improve how she was using free time, so I'd put the list of things for that time slot so she'd realize the things she might like to pursue. It's another way to get more done. Sometimes you want them to do it to themselves but they need the prompt. So I was putting those prompts on the checklist saying do something productive, here's a list unless you have something better... And yes, you're seeing Sat/Sun work on there. She had issues transitioning back on Mondays after a weekend off, so I assigned work on the weekends to keep her brain in gear. That was one of those still small voice things, where I had to get alone and realize what the problem was and solve it. ;) I think that 8th gr list also has our WWS assignments, btw. It probably doesn't say WWS and it just looks really cryptic, with page numbers and color abbreviations in the writing row. But that's what it was, our WWS stuff. I went through the entire manual with a highlighter, color coding chunks for each day. I did it a week at a time, but that's how I made it independent for her. She's super ADHD and couldn't have done it otherwise. 2nd week of January.pdf 6th grade March.pdf Schedule winter '11b.pdf
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