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Catwoman

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Catwoman last won the day on March 16

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About Catwoman

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  1. But this isn’t about your dh and his sister. This is about your children and their aunt, and you are involved because you were there when your dds made the arrangement for their aunt to purchase the cookies. So you are well within your rights to tell SIL that your dds can’t afford to pay for the cookies she ordered, so your kids will just go ahead and sell them around your neighborhood to get their money back. And if SIL doesn’t like that, you can flatly explain that you’re teaching your dds about running a business, and part of running a business is that they get paid for what they sell and they don’t give their merchandise away for free. Honestly, I can’t imagine why you would even think of letting her take such advantage of your daughters, and for that matter, your dh should be chomping at the bit to tell his sister off for pulling this sneaky, rotten stunt on his children. His sister’s feelings shouldn’t be his priority. His daughters should be the priority, and he should be absolutely disgusted with his sister right now because her irresponsible and manipulative behavior is completely unacceptable.
  2. I agree completely. I would be absolutely livid if a family member pulled a stunt like that on my child, and not only would I would not let it go, but that family member would be told in no uncertain terms what I thought of her for doing such a rotten thing. And I am floored by the idea that she still expects to receive the cookies!
  3. Yes, and that’s exactly what manipulators count on. She is stealing money from your family. Your children are seeing her walk all over you. There is no way I would give her the cookies. If I was going to be paying for them, I would give them to my kids to sell and let them keep the proceeds. I honestly don’t understand why you would even consider giving the cookies to such a selfish, entitled jerk who has no problem stealing from your dds.
  4. I’ll be the lone dissenter and say that we have always paid for the kinds of things being described in this thread, as did the parents of my ds’s friends. We also never required our ds to do chores, although he has always been fine with helping out if we asked him. 🙂 I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer to this.
  5. Honestly, you may have been better off if you had posted a poll without giving any details about your ds. You included information about your son having been deceitful and about him not caring about this law, so I’m not sure why you would be surprised that people considered those things when they responded to your question. Dishonesty and a disregard for the law are not small matters. Realistically, if you had posted in your OP that you’d caught your son driving with other teens in the car but that he was immediately remorseful, I think our responses would have been quite different. The idea that he didn’t care about the law and the knowledge that he was dishonest with you were probably more important to most of us than the fact that he had broken the law once or twice. We all make mistakes, but if we aren’t remorseful and we don’t change our behavior, that’s the bigger issue. I’m sorry if you were offended by some of our replies, but I think everyone was posting in good faith and had your son’s safety in mind.
  6. I think we might have scared cave canem away. I hope not. She’s nice. 🙂 I am curious about how she feels about this topic. We know how her son feels, but I’m not sure exactly where she stands on it. I hope she stands firm with her son and doesn’t let him drive without adult supervision until he develops a much better attitude toward the importance of safety and obeying the law. Her son doesn’t seem to realize it, but disregarding the law and his parents wishes could literally be a life and death situation.
  7. I’m sure it was awkward to rat the girl out, but hopefully the embarrassment was enough to get that girl to buckle up whenever she gets into a car. I’m glad the mom appreciated it that you told her — it probably scared her to think that her dd was riding in cars without wearing her seatbelt!
  8. I don’t think I would want to have his license revoked because it might be difficult to get it reinstated when he is ready to start driving on his own again. I would, however, only allow him to drive when he had a parent in the car with him. I would want him to keep practicing his driving skills.
  9. That’s such an important distinction. Your dd was remorseful. Everybody does stupid things sometimes. Cave canem’s son certainly isn’t the first kid to drive with his friends in the car. But when he got caught, he showed no remorse whatsoever, and cave canem probably can’t trust him not to deceive her again. That’s what worries me.
  10. His attitude is what is most worrisome. If he doesn’t respect your rules or the law, the next thing he might be saying is, “I only had a few beers at the party before I drove home, and it’s no big deal because everyone else was drinking too.”
  11. Cave canem — please don’t think we are picking on you or that we think your son is a terrible, reckless driver! He might be an excellent driver and he might always drive safely when he has friends in the car... but when lives are on the line, safety matters and following the law is important, so I think the big concerns here are his lack of respect for the law and the fact that he has deceived you about what he has been doing — as well as his blasé attitude about the whole thing. Are you sure he is mature enough to be driving without a parent in the car with him?
  12. Well, he can keep his moral superiority... as long as he hands over the car keys and stops driving until he can obey the law.
  13. I’m not sure what you’re hoping we will say here. It seems like everyone is in complete agreement that your son should be obeying the law about the passengers in his car. You said he agreed to obey that law, but then deceived you and made a lame excuse when he was caught. Personally, if my kid lied to me about that, he would be losing his driving privileges. This is not a minor little thing. And if you are pretty sure he’s driving over the speed limit, perhaps you should equip the car so that you can monitor how fast he is driving. I hope I’m wrong about this, but I have to say that if he is driving around with a bunch of his friends in the car, he may be driving a lot faster and more recklessly than you think. Both of these things are serious safety issues, not just to your son and his passengers, but to everyone else on the road with him.
  14. I think part of the problem in this particular situation is that Olivia Jade has become sort of the poster child for this scandal, and it seems like she practically took pride in not caring about school and joking (or maybe not joking!) about never being at school when she was in high school, so people are assuming that she and her family represent all of the families who were involved. I agree, though, that it’s wrong to tie SAT scores to intelligence and that it happens a lot. I certainly give kids who do well on the SAT a lot of credit for it, but I also realize that plenty of equally or more highly intelligent kids simply aren’t good test-takers and/or that their abilities and intelligence aren’t well-measured by standardized tests. The worst thing is when I see parents believe the negative stereotypes about their own kids if the kids don’t get amazing SAT scores. 😞
  15. Clearly, Olivia’s parents must have raised her to be as honest and fair-minded as they are. And now it is coming back to bite the whole family.
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