dirty ethel rackham Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I don't know how much I have shared about my part-time job here. Back in August, I started working at a local tea shop. It was part of my "start rebuilding my life after losing all of my friends when K got sick" plan and "preparing for dd leaving for college" plan. I've really enjoyed it and am pretty good at it. I took the job because I shop there frequently and because she was willing to work around my schedule with dd (a little bit of homeschooling left, but I also do a bit of driving with her for her sport.) And it wasn't like much of retail ... long, unpredictable hours, late notice of the schedule, etc. It is a small shop and we had sales metrics we had to meet. I was doing fine in all of those, but had to work at putting on the extrovert suit to approach customers that had that "unapproachable" look because that was expected of me. Back in early November, I could tell that my boss was cooling towards me. She started scheduling me for fewer hours. I made some mistakes, but even though I was the newest employee, I was doing better than many of the young college student employees. I don't really know what changed. I got sick the week of Thanksgiving with acute bronchitis (they tested me for pertussis.) She completely took me off the schedule for the entire month of December (the busiest month) except for Christmas and New Years' Eve, despite me giving her the doctors note telling her when I was available to go back to work. I tried going in to talk to her and she avoided giving straight answers, but mumbled something about my availability not matching up with her needs, despite me offering to switch availability. I was not scheduled on any day that she was working. Well, I got the email today that she won't be scheduling me for anymore hours and good luck with future endeavors, blah blah blah. I had an inkling it was coming. The assistant manager that I have been working with let a couple of things slip that she knew I wouldn't be working there. Yes, I did know it was coming. But I am devastated. There are so many things I want to email back. I want to ask her what the hell I did wrong that she didn't like me anymore. I want to call her on the carpet for not being straight with me about hours. I want to yell at her that I needed this job ... maybe not as much for the money as some of them (it does help pay tuition,) but mostly because I needed to have a place to go to where I could think about something other than the losses and emptiness of my life. I basically want to tell her to shove it. I didn't even have a chance to tell my coworkers goodbye ... I'm afraid that she will tell them that I quit or something. I just don't even want to go into that store anymore. It just reeks of failure ... at a retail job that I was good at. But I won't. I will try to decide if I want to be "available on an as-needed" basis or if I will just do the "thank you for the opportunity" email. And I'm mad that I forgot to make that last purchase with my employee discount. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I'm sorry. That is disappointing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I would get legal advice from a labour relations lawyer and put pressure on her to either officially let you go (and then seek all the compensation you a legally owed), or increase your hours. You have a lot more work-place rights than she is providing you. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 That stinks!! I'm so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 That stinks. I hate when stuff ends like that. (hugs) Imo, it is reasonable to ask why she fired you. It sure sounds like she perhaps believed a lie or there was a misunderstanding she never tried to clear up. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Did anyone have it out for you? I have a friend who had a part time job, and another woman had it out for her and flat out lied to the boss saying my friend did things she didn't. The boss said, "Well, it's she said-she said. I don't know which of you is telling the truth." My friend had to leave that job because the woman turned the boss and everyone else against her. It seemed to be a jealousy thing. It's hard to tell if you asked for an honest answer of why she cooled toward you whether she'd tell you or not. She'll either tell you, or she'll lie and just say a bland thing like, "It just wasn't working out..." I can't imagine how frustrating this is to you. I would be steaming and feel gutted. I'm so sorry. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnnE-girl Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I’m so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen A Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Wow, sad, and frustrating. Sorry that it ended that way. (Hugs). I too would attempt to find out what was going on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 That stinks. In the long run you don’t want to be where you aren’t wanted but a clue as to what you did wrong would be nice. That fact that she won’t tell you indicates it is for an unethical or illegal reason 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Well that stinks. I hope you find something better soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamaraby Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Is there an HR department you can contact? I’m sorry, that really stinks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: :grouphug: I'm sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scholastica Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I’m sorry this happened. I hope you can get a straight answer. Hopefully, this will turn out for the best. She doesn’t sound like a great person to work for long term. Praying that something better comes along. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Selkie Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Well, that sucks! I am sorry. Wish I lived closer so I could boycott the shop for you. I have long admired you on this board. I hope something better comes soon. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 That stinks. I am so sorry. I think this means that there is something better waiting for you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Yuck. What a rotten way fir her to handle things. I’m so sorry. That stinks. And hurts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Mousie Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I'm sorry, Ellen. I know it hurts. I would not contact a lawyer or anything like that. Instead, if you can manage it, a brief face-to-face with her might be good, especially so you can try to find out what happened, and to ask her if she thinks she'd be able to give you a good reference in the future. Go ahead and tell her you enjoyed working there and, if you can, wish her well. :grouphug: I hope you're able to find another suitable position soon. 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I would get legal advice from a labour relations lawyer and put pressure on her to either officially let you go (and then seek all the compensation you a legally owed), or increase your hours. You have a lot more work-place rights than she is providing you. Gosh, where do you live and what sort of businesses do you work in? In the businesses I've worked in and states I've lived in (and managed HR/staff in), I don't think this would be helpful or productive. At all. That said, I'm very sorry about this situation. How discouraging and upsetting. That really, really stinks. Sounds like the employer just has a stick up her butt for some reason -- and like she's not a very good manager. My guess would be that you did nothing wrong. Might be a political or other difference of opinion that she became aware of and was really peeved about, or a total misunderstanding, or just something random that has nothing to do with you. Re-entering the workforce after taking time off for family needs is hard enough. This would be a punch in the gut to me. I hope you find a GREAT, SUPER AWESOME EVEN BETTER job in place of this one quickly. I think either of your approaches sounds good. It's always a good idea (for you) to leave things on as positive a note as possible. (((hugs))) 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mumto2 Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 (edited) I’m sorry. :grouphug: Edited January 1, 2018 by mumto2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStepAtATime Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: 1. Give this a day to percolate. 2. Write her a letter where you tell her exactly how you feel and what you think of her. 3. Burn the letter. 4. Start over. Try hard not to burn a bridge. You don't really know what happened behind the scenes. I would be trying to find out what happened, if possible. Write a letter in which you thank her for giving you the opportunity to work at a place you have enjoyed as a customer and as an employee. Then ask to schedule a meeting. Keep it as neutral and professional as possible. Offer a couple of dates/times that you are available that you suspect she would be too and how to contact you to confirm the time of the meeting. 5. If she does not respond then either pursue this further through other avenues, show up and pleasantly request a quick meeting or drop it, send in a letter of resignation and walk away. 6. If she does respond, try hard to stay as neutral and pleasant and professional as possible. Point blank ask her, clearly and politely worded (maybe write down a few ways you might approach the topic), why the change, explain that the only way you can improve as an employee is to get feedback from her, and be honest that you really liked working there. If she doesn't seem willing to share THEN consider how you want to proceed. Right now, though, I would be trying to dig into this further. 16 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frances Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I'm so sorry to hear this. I think OneStepStATime gives some good advice. I hope you get closure and soon find a better position. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Hugs. I'm sorry. That sucks. I think I would like to tell her that I would appreciate knowing what the biggest problem was, in order to avoid the same problem at the next job. I would also like to know what she will say to anyone who calls about your work history there. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GinaPagnato Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I'm sorry. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emzhengjiu Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 You might consider filing for unemployment. The money isn't ever much, but it can help. I'm so sorry your going through this. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasider Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 (edited) I'm sorry, Ellen. I know it hurts. I would not contact a lawyer or anything like that. Instead, if you can manage it, a brief face-to-face with her might be good, especially so you can try to find out what happened, and to ask her if she thinks she'd be able to give you a good reference in the future. Go ahead and tell her you enjoyed working there and, if you can, wish her well. :grouphug: I hope you're able to find another suitable position soon. Yes, it may be hard, but get up, dress up, and go in and face her. Put on your extrovert suit and be ready to give her a genuine, not-upset face and let her know that you cannot afford to keep your schedule open to availability on an as-needed basis, that you will be pursuing other employment opportunities and you sincerely would like to know what you can do to improve future job performance. I believe she was unkind, but that this situation will not result in your favor if pursued in a legal way, and you need to think about the reaction she may have if called as a reference. You should figure out how to leave on a kill-her-with-kindness note, kwim? I'm sorry, Ellen. Getting back "out there" after years at home with kids, or after a few years of intense family demands that curtail normalish life activities, can be a challenging process. Wading similar waters here. I'm hopeful for you, that a better opportunity waits right around the corner for you. Many hugs. Edited January 1, 2018 by Seasider 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwik Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 (edited) Gosh, where do you live and what sort of businesses do you work in? In the businesses I've worked in and states I've lived in (and managed HR/staff in), I don't think this would be helpful or productive. At all. That said, I'm very sorry about this situation. How discouraging and upsetting. That really, really stinks. Sounds like the employer just has a stick up her butt for some reason -- and like she's not a very good manager. My guess would be that you did nothing wrong. Might be a political or other difference of opinion that she became aware of and was really peeved about, or a total misunderstanding, or just something random that has nothing to do with you. Re-entering the workforce after taking time off for family needs is hard enough. This would be a punch in the gut to me. I hope you find a GREAT, SUPER AWESOME EVEN BETTER job in place of this one quickly. I think either of your approaches sounds good. It's always a good idea (for you) to leave things on as positive a note as possible. (((hugs))) I am constantly amazed at how poorly people can be treated in the US. Even with the dilution of rights introduced by 90 day trials she would have some rights simply because August to December is more than that. Not saying they couldn't have forced her out unfortunately just they would have had to be more sneaky or jumped through all the hoops. And the sneaky option can backfire on the employer if you are tough enough. Edited January 1, 2018 by kiwik 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plansrme Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I'm sorry that happened, but I don't think it's that uncommon when dealing with retail positions. People are petty; bosses are capricious; co-workers lie. I would try really hard not to care and move on. Writing your former boss a letter or going to see her is not going to help. Finding a better job that you like better? That's going to help. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 She sound immature, petty, and in over her head. I'm so sorry that you had to work for someone who sullied your relationship with an establishment that you truly liked, and who was unworthy of you. My strong impression is that it's not you, it's her. FWIW. Shake the dust off your feet and move on. Don't let her get you down--she is not worth it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debbi in Texas Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 So sorry this has happened to you!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyGF Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Sorry. :-( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
displace Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 Bummer :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny_Weatherwax Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I would get legal advice from a labour relations lawyer and put pressure on her to either officially let you go (and then seek all the compensation you a legally owed), or increase your hours. You have a lot more work-place rights than she is providing you. What compensation do you think she would be owed? It stinks, but she can’t expect payment for hours that she wasn’t assigned to work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lanny Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 She did not have the courtesy to terminate you in person, so the email you received is your termination notice. Print that out immediately. Forward it to your Secondary email account. If you file for unemployment compensation, she terminated you. You did not quit. You wanted to continue working there. Also, best to be as polite and courteous as is possible, in case you give her for a reference... Good luck on finding a much better position! The job market is far better than it has been in years, but I think it will be about the 15th of the month before things settle down after the holidays and people actually begin hiring. 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I agree that you should go see her in person if you can manage it. Not because it will change things, but because she doesn't deserve to get away with letting you know via email. Rude and unprofessional! She is an extremely poor manager and boss if she can't talk to people in person and give them straight answers. Kudos to you for pursuing it in the first place! Now you have recent experience, and "they didn't have enough hours for me" is a perfectly reasonable explanation for not staying there. Don't let her foolishness discourage you. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawana Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 That really stinks! As a fellow sensitive person, I can imagine how devastated I would feel. I don't think the chances of finding out what really happened are very good, because it seems like she is avoiding conflict, and as such, won't be upfront with you. I do think it is worth making one attempt to communicate because while I would desperately want to know the whole story, there are two things that could actually impact your future job prospects. 1. Would she be able to give you a good reference, and 2. Is there anything she might suggest that could improve your functioning at another job. Those two things are completely reasonable to ask, and if communicated unemotionally, would be no threat to anyone. If she cannot provide satisfactory answers, you can be sure the problem lies with her, not you. I wish you the best and am sending copious amounts of energy and confidence your way! 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mominco Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 What a hotdog for doing it by email. Clearly show what a manager she is and how she is not really management material. May your next job be a wonderful one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bootsie Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I am so sorry to hear that this has happened. It sounds is if it is likely that this has nothing to do with you. Perhaps they are having financial trouble and are cutting back on employees. Perhaps a friend of hers came to help out over the holidays and decided she would like to work throughout the year. Not that those reason don't make it less painful for you. Although you are reasonably angry, I would try to remain as calm and diplomatic as possible to increase the possibility of receiving a good recommendation from her. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guilfordlake Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I'm sorry. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I do think it is worth making one attempt to communicate because while I would desperately want to know the whole story, there are two things that could actually impact your future job prospects. And I think it's worth making one attempt to communicate (in person) simply to make the wretched boss uncomfortable. So, lots of reasons! :laugh: 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 I wouldn't bother to communicate with her. Print the letter and file for unemployment. Then you have some time and resources to look for a better job. Bummer for her to treat you that way. :grouphug: 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scholastica Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 I’m not sure I’d file for unemployment. There weren’t that many hours worked. The employer will get dinged and will know exactly who it was that triggered the rate increase. That can’t be good for a future reference Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bootsie Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 The requirements one must meet to file for unemployment vary from state to state. Also, the impact that a claim filed will have on the employer will vary from state to state. Some states will charge higher premiums to company's with a record of laying people off, other states do not. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emzhengjiu Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 Maybe you could ask for a letter of reference. She might be willing especially since it shouldn't harm her business. That way if she says anything negative later, you have the letter as rebuttal. She might even sign a letter you write if it's a more or less a standard reference letter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alessandra Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 I am so sorry. Definitely file for unemployment. It may make your employer look bad. :-) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted January 2, 2018 Share Posted January 2, 2018 Ugh. This is definitely wrong and terribly unfair. I’m so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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