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StephanieZ last won the day on January 10 2014

StephanieZ had the most liked content!

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About StephanieZ

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    Young Adult Child Wrangler

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    Between a hill and a valley

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  1. It's a thing in the USA. It's essentially a scholarship program based largely on testing high on a standardized test - the PSAT - that is administered to pretty much all 11th graders. The top 1% of students become semifinalists. There there's an application process that winnows those semifinalists just a bit (16,000 to 15,000) to become finalists (essentially, they have to have strong, consistent grades, and they have to get a comparably high score on another standardized test - the SAT, and you have to fill out forms with their transcripts and get a recommendation, etc.. (I know the process w
  2. Thank you all for the kind, kind words. I'm so happy for her, and I am proud, too. It's easy to dwell on my parental shortcomings these challenging days of parenting young adults, and I have to say it's really nice to have a reminder of some of the things I did right. DD's pretty much 100% schooling on her own, transitioning to college courses this past year, so I'm pretty much DONE homeschooling. This sort of feels like the last task I had undone ... from being a homeschooling mom. And, now, it's really pretty much all over other than checking the boxes over the next 9 months. I guess it
  3. Can you please indulge me in a mama brag? I can't/won't do this IRL, but I want to share it with someone. My third and final child . . . just got official notification of being a National Merit Semifinalist. (And her score is very high, and she will no doubt be a Finalist and then a Scholar.) Both my older two kids did the same, so I'm 3 for 3 for nailing this particular achievement. I've screwed up a lot. But, at least I did educate them well.
  4. Random ordered thoughts . . . Sooooo many nuances to this decision. Usually, owning two houses at the same time isn't an option financially for most folks. So, you've gotta sell first, then buy. + Don't pay extra on your current mortgage right now. Save the cash. That's a no brainer. + You should sit down with a knowledgable realtor for an hour. That would answer most of your questions much better than I can. + Answers depend a lot on market conditions. In some towns, it may be that things are so "hot" that no seller is going to accept an offer with a contingency to sell your
  5. I do understand that it's hard. That's why I suggest "reminding yourself," of the reality of the situation. As long as they are mentally fit (legally and medically), you are NOT responsible for their problems. If/when they both become unfit (or one is a danger to the other), then you may have to take control, but that would require a lot of legal guidance. As long as either of them is still mentally fit, then you have zero power in this situation, and IMHO, you're best off learning to handle your lack of control and limit your own vulnerability to pain/trouble/angst. If you need therapy to hel
  6. I'm sorry you're experiencing this. Sounds really rough. (((hugs))) I'd remind yourself that you may owe your parents some degree of caring, but you owe NOTHING to your parents' crap. Humans =/= their possessions. When "you have to deal with it," you can choose to simply A) decline being executor of the estate and just let the state take everything they own or maybe set it on fire or whatever. or B) If there's enough money available to make it worth the while of dealing with the estate, just spend as much as is needed to hire help. Go through it as much as you wish (or not at all),
  7. What you describe is the PERFECT home to buy IMHO. Good bones, needs cosmetic updates. Go buy it. Update as you can.

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  9. Hell to the no. Wait a year. It'll be fine. If there's some urgent need for one or two procedures/visits this year to keep things stable, fine. But, committing to monthly medical visits? Forget it unless there is no other medically appropriate alternative that allows for waiting.
  10. This. 30 years ago, an affluent, loving mother I knew well with 5 young children had to give one (10 year old) up to the state in order for him to access mental health services. The 30 day stay their private health insurance was willing to pay for was used up, and her child was still throwing himself out of moving vehicles and otherwise risking danger to himself and others. The only way to access hospitalization again was by giving custody up to the state. Ultimately, he was returned to her custody. She's struggled for the last 30 years to help him, including hundreds of thousands of doll
  11. Don't hesitate. If you can afford it, do it.
  12. Get rid of all carpeting. Made a massive difference in our household.
  13. 1) It may or may not be helpful, but your daughter *might* be able to change exchange plans because it might permit her a "special enrollment period." If that's the case, check her state's exchange and see if there's a better plan that would provide better coverage. 2) People, please remember health care when you're voting. Until we get single payer universal health coverage, these stories will just devastate more and more families.
  14. All your pets need to be treated. Get "good stuff" from the vet, more than simply Sentinel. If you've got an active infestation, Sentinel on only one pet would take ages to rid the house of the fleas. I'd add a good quality topical "topspot" such as Advantix for the dog and Advantage Multi for the cat. I don't know about rabbits, but if they can get fleas, then give them whatever your vet recommends for them. BE CAREFUL because some dog products are VERY toxic to cats. Don't use a dog product on a cat. EVER!! You need to vacuum daily and throw away the vacuum bag each day. And wash
  15. Absolutely not normal and definitely awful. GROSS!!!! I'd be furious!
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