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About GinaPagnato

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    Hive Mind Queen Bee

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  1. Thank you for this lovely reminder. I needed it!
  2. Maybe you're substituting the relationship needs that aren't being filled by your DH with your relationship with your kids? Idk, this just jumped out at me. Dh and I do a lot together on the weekends, and we've become one of those couples that watches TV together for a little bit each evening. We never used to do that, mainly because there was so much to be done with and for the kids. Now that they're older, I'm kinda enjoying watching TV. Who knew!? Yeah, and see, I am thinking I will have to force myself to be an involved grandmother, because I am really really REALLY enjoying creating my own life now with my work. My kids have mentioned here and there that they really want Dh and me to be involved with their kids (when they have them), and I'm kinda like...😐 (this is where I need the run away emoji, lol!)
  3. I started working full-time, and that has been fantastic! I'm just way too happily busy with my work to keep stressing about my adult kids' choices. I feel more layered, balanced, and emotionally independent. I'm not always available for them at the drop of a hat, which I think is better for them and for me, honestly. Could you increase your work days/hours?
  4. I'm sorry. Your DH was rude and insensitive, and had it been me, I would've lost my marbles. You say you normally have a great relationship, so if this conversation was a fluke, I'd chalk it up to him having a long and stressful day, as well as a bad case of foot-in-mouth disease.
  5. A phone that's lasted 3+ years has had a good, long run. Thank it for its service to you (see, a little Konmarie added in there), and get yourself a new one. I've had Samsungs and now an iPhone, and I like them both. I wouldn't hesitate to switch.
  6. Precisely. I think it's just smart to get to know people in groups because not only do you have a chance to see the person interacting with others, you also avoid the pressure of a dating situation that always makes people put their best foot forward. There have been many occasions when my DC have been interested in someone from afar, only to decide they weren't all that interested once they saw how the individual behaved with and treated others. My DC may not have been able to make that observation had they moved right to dating.
  7. Well at least she wasn't sexist and didn't apply this to girls only, lol!
  8. I truly have never understood the whole courtship thing. You're supposed to know at, what, 18? 21? 24? who you want to marry? And this is accomplished without dating other people to discover who you want to eliminate from your marriage-potential list? How are you supposed to know what you want in a mate if you don't date? How are you supposed to know what you DON'T want in a mate if you don't date? You learn so much about yourself and others when you date so that if/when it's time to commit, you're doing so with experience.
  9. OMG, I would never last at that gym! I am a proud member of the great unwashed who use a gym to like...exercise. Sorry for your loss! ?
  10. Different situation for me because I really like my SIL, BUT...she is super duper political, and I don't agree with her on many issues. She's an activist and posts tons of articles and links that support her ideology. I just can't see that all day long, so I snooze her account, which lasts for 30 days. Then I dip my toe in the pool again with her, and if she's ramping up, out I go into snooze-land!
  11. I did this last month. I always do small purges in the summer, but this time it was BIG. It's hard to get through, but WONDERFUL when it's done! Happy tossing!
  12. I'm not sure what you mean by floppy. Do you mean it bounces on your body when you walk? Any crossbody bag with a large flap that doesn't have a magnetic closure may flop. I think you need a flap that isn't a compartment on its own and that has a magnetic closure.
  13. Holy. Cow. You're not going crazy...he is. Bat shit crazy. Man, that's unreal.
  14. I think this whole thread reinforces the idea that parenting older teens/young adults is a tricky business. We *think* we've been teaching and modeling certain lifestyles and values all of their lives. And especially if we homeschooled them, we figure we mitigated a lot of what their peer group may feel pressured into doing. So when they grow up and we realize they haven't really caught what we've taught, it's confusing, frustrating, and sometimes even demoralizing. Like, "I've been teaching you this by word and deed for decades, and you're acting like you have no concept of it." I've BTDT with regard to other issues, so I feel for Quill. In the end, a conversation and a clear financial payback method is needed because her DD, like some of my DC, need to know the expectations. And the expectations need to be crystal clear, since they have not internalized the values, or maybe I should say they do not express the values in a way that jibes with us. This will keep US from feeling bitter, resentful, and taken advantage of.
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