Chris in VA Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I need a black or nearly black dress. Is this appropriate? http://www.avenue.com/en_US/floral-hacci-jacket-dress-114629674.html?dwvar_114629674_color=101#start=3&cgid=jacket-dresses The funeral is being held at a funeral home. There is a time of remembering, but no service, per se. I usually go for solids, even if they are dark and not black, but I have to find one quickly and a lot of the black ones I've seen are sparkly and really for evening wear. I don't feel comfortable in a suit or a skirt and blouse (I'm about a size 18 W). Thanks for any opinions or links. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Yes, that is appropriate. So sorry about your loss. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiguirre Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I think it's appropriate. I'm sorry for your loss. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Yes, that is a good choice. So sorry you are going through this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) I am so sorry, Chris. I am a plus sized person, and for that I would wear a Vickki Vi black dress with somber or black jacket. This is the one I have: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/vikki-vi-sleeveless-shift-dress-plus-size/4044196?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=BLACK It's skimming, opaque, deep warm black (instead of cold flat black), WASHABLE (!!!), heavy but not oppressive, difficult to wrinkle, travels well, and since it's a shift it doesn't bind at the waist so size-wise it is forgiving. It goes with everything. Black water shoes=beach dress. Black heels=evening dress. Flats and a jacket=business dress. It is quite literally the most useful article of clothing I own. When I go on business trips I bring it with two jackets and three long flowy scarves (a lacy white silk one, a demure heavy cream silk yarn one with black beads knitted in, and a gauzy one in a bright color--either hot yellow or bright violet), and I am set for the week. My point is that if you get this, it will be perfect for this occasion but also very useful going forward. The dress you posted would be nice for most funerals, but I am old school and would wear all black to the funeral of a family member, OR, solid black underneath with a white jacket to symbolize Resurrection. Edited October 11, 2017 by Carol in Cal. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Selkie Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm so sorry. :grouphug: The dress is appropriate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creekland Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I don't have a fashion gene in my body, so can't truly offer an opinion. I just wanted to offer my sincere condolences. :grouphug: That said, I can't imagine anyone getting hung up on what someone wears TBH, and wouldn't have noticed a thing out of place with your selection. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Sorry about your brother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm sorry Chris. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Oh Chris, not a good year. I'm so sorry :grouphug: The dress is lovely and appropriate. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted October 11, 2017 Author Share Posted October 11, 2017 I am so sorry, Chris. I am a plus sized person, and for that I would wear a Vickki Vi black dress with somber or black jacket. This is the one I have: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/vikki-vi-sleeveless-shift-dress-plus-size/4044196?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=BLACK It's skimming, opaque, deep warm black (instead of cold flat black), WASHABLE (!!!), heavy but not oppressive, difficult to wrinkle, travels well, and since it's a shift it doesn't bind at the waist so size-wise it is forgiving. It goes with everything. Black water shoes=beach dress. Black heels=evening dress. Flats and a jacket=business dress. It is quite literally the most useful article of clothing I own. When I go on business trips I bring it with two jackets and three long flowy scarves (a lacy white silk one, a demure heavy cream silk yarn one with black beads knitted in, and a gauzy one in a bright color--either hot yellow or bright violet), and I am set for the week. My point is that if you get this, it will be perfect for this occasion but also very useful going forward. The dress you posted would be nice for most funerals, but I am old school and would wear all black to the funeral of a family member, OR, solid black underneath with a white jacket to symbolize Resurrection. Thank you so much--I thought maybe solid was better. I can't wear white with it, though, and would need to find my own jacket and the other comes with one already. But yes, I am really looking for all black. I have something, but wanted something else. I think I just want to distract myself by shopping, actually. I do truly need shoes, though. Thanks everyone for the comments. Going shopping today and not sure what I'll find. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ethel Mertz Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Sorry about your brother. And, yes, the outfit is appropriate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm so sorry, Chris. The dress you linked is pretty and appropriate. :grouphug: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) I'm sorry :grouphug: Edited October 11, 2017 by Ausmumof3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mschickie Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I am so sorry for your loss. If you wanted you could do something simple like this swing dress from Macy's https://www.macys.com/shop/product/style-co-plus-size-swing-dress-created-for-macys?ID=2894737&CategoryID=5449&swatchColor=Deep%20Black&swatchColor=Deep%20Black#fn=COLOR%3DBlack%26SIZE%3DWOMEN_PLUS_SIZE_T%3A18W%2C%202X%26sp%3D1%26spc%3D5448%26ruleId%3D78%7CBOOST%20SAVED%20SET%26searchPass%3DmatchNone%26slotId%3D3 or something like this one https://www.macys.com/shop/product/love-squared-trendy-plus-size-knotted-fit-flare-dress?ID=3449634&CategoryID=5449&swatchColor=Black#fn=COLOR%3DBlack%26SIZE%3DWOMEN_PLUS_SIZE_T%3A18W%2C%202X%26sp%3D1%26spc%3D433%26ruleId%3D78%7CBOOST%20SAVED%20SET%26searchPass%3DmatchNone%26slotId%3D28 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) Black jacket, on sale: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/caslon-cotton-knit-open-front-blazer-regular-petite/4792195?origin=coordinating-4792195-60140241-1-FTR-recbot-recently_viewed_snowplow_mvp&recs_placement=FTR&recs_strategy=recently_viewed_snowplow_mvp&recs_source=recbot&recs_page_type=category They have free returns/free shipping, so if it were me I would order the XL and the XXL and send back the one that didn't fit as well. Edited October 11, 2017 by Carol in Cal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I think it is appropriate and lovely. I'm sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 These flats are crazy comfortable and on sale for about half off: http://www.earthbrands.com/item/earth-shoes-bellwether-leather-ballet-flat/24440/119 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Im sorry for your loss. :grouphug: The dress is really nice, and I think it’s definitely appropriate, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted October 11, 2017 Author Share Posted October 11, 2017 Thanks, Carol! I won't have time to order something, though, as I'm leaving Friday morning. Good to know for the future, though. And, actually, I think it's good to have these sorts of things in my closet. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) I'm so sorry Chris. It's a lovely dress for the weather with the two pieces. And don't over think it. Focus on some nice memories. :grouphug: Edited October 11, 2017 by Starr Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted October 11, 2017 Author Share Posted October 11, 2017 Black jacket, on sale: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/caslon-cotton-knit-open-front-blazer-regular-petite/4792195?origin=coordinating-4792195-60140241-1-FTR-recbot-recently_viewed_snowplow_mvp&recs_placement=FTR&recs_strategy=recently_viewed_snowplow_mvp&recs_source=recbot&recs_page_type=category They have free returns/free shipping, so if it were me I would order the XL and the XXL and send back the one that didn't fit as well. That's really nice. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janeway Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) It does not matter. I know, it is trivial. Go with the nearly black dress. You do not want to make decisions right now. My mom's funeral came on so suddenly that I saw all colors there, even white with a floral print. I am very sorry about your brother. Death sucks, so much, so incredibly much. edited to add: I love the dress in the picture. It is appropriate. Edited October 11, 2017 by Janeway Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm so sorry for your loss :( That dress is appropriate, but listen, nobody is going to the funeral with the intent of critiquing your clothing. So many of us don't have funeral-ready clothes in our wardrobes. It's okay to go in something that's not all black if you just don't have it, so long as it's reasonably somber. I think I just want to distract myself by shopping, actually. I do truly need shoes, though. That's a fairly normal impulse, and also okay. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) I'm really here to say I'm sorry. :grouphug: :grouphug: But yes, the dress is perfectly appropriate. I have been to several funerals this year and there is a wide variety of clothing styles and colors worn. ETA: FWIW, my sister wore a floral print dress, predominately red, to my dad's funeral. My nephew wore one of dad's ties - also red. Red was dad's favorite color and my guess is, he would have been pleased. If anyone was scandalized, they kept it to themselves. Last week I went to a funeral. The daughter of the deceased wore a nice t-shirt in a floral print, and black slacks. That was likely a typical work outfit for her. Again, if anyone thought she was wrong, they were wise to keep it to themselves. Edited October 11, 2017 by marbel 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm sorry for your loss. And I was in a similar clothing situation when my mom passed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innisfree Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=1079802&pcid=1079799&vid=8&pid=113591002 I own this one in the winter wine color. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I’m sorry for your loss. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrincessMommy Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) I think the dress is perfectly appropriate. So sorry for the loss of your brother. Edited October 11, 2017 by PrincessMommy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I am so sorry. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 The dress you linked in pretty and appropriate. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 The dress you linked is totally appropriate. I am so sorry for your loss :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikslo Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I think the dress you linked is very classy. Sorry for your loss. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm sorry for your loss. I do like the dress you picked out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hornblower Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm sorry for your loss Chris. :grouphug: Wear anything. There is no inappropriate way to be during grief. The recent funerals I've attended have had plenty of color at them. Anything you'd wear to a very traditional job interview or anything you'd wear to a Sunday service is absolutely fine. If the person had a favourite color, it's especially appropriate to wear it or have an accessory in it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 i'm so sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashfern Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 :grouphug: So sorry for your loss. I think the dress you posted is perfectly acceptable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vintage81 Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I think the dress you linked is appropriate. I'm really sorry for your loss. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 Sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 So sorry Chris. And yes the dress is fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
debinindy Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I think it is appropriate and lovely. I'm sorry for your loss. Just about what I was going to say. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm sorry, Chris. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm so sorry, Chris. :crying: I hope the shopping is a good distraction for you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom@shiloh Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 So sorry. I also think it's ok to wear a color besides black to a funeral. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
displace Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 (Hugs) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 So sorry for your loss. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 :grouphug: So Sorry for your loss! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stephanier.1765 Posted October 11, 2017 Share Posted October 11, 2017 I'm so sorry about the loss of your brother. :grouphug: Was he your only sibling? I love the dress in your OP and the options suggested by other PP are lovely as well. Any of them would be appropriate and comfortable as well. I know for myself that the last thing I want to worry about during the funeral is how my clothes look. Take good care of yourself. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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