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Everything posted by Tanaqui

  1. You know, I never got an art class in school that taught any form of technique or skill - it was ALL "art based on your feelings" excepting one term of art history. (Required course.) Presumably it's different for students who go to arts schools, but I wouldn't be surprised if that's the expectation for enrichment classes for non-serious students as well... at least in some areas. You may need to shop around if you want an actual lesson, is what I mean.
  2. Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankind; And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee. ~ John Donne
  3. Some of those could be deaths due to suicide or overdose, which have also been on the increase during this pandemic. Families may be reluctant to share that information publicly. And I get it, I do. If you don't utterly hate socialization and people, quarantining is hard. Being careful when you do go out is stressful. Worrying about bills - geez. But the solution has never been to pretend there is no pandemic! The solution, awful as it is, is as much as possible to just *deal* with it, and if we'd all done it stronger and sooner it might not have dragged out quite this badly, meaning that ultimately those people whose mental health really is suffering from the shutdown might have started to recover already.
  4. The impact is that if the average American knows 600 people (rough estimate from google) and can recognize by face about 1500 more people - people who walk their dogs when you do, or who take the same bus as you, or who buy groceries on the same schedule you do, you know, people you see but don't know - then every American is missing 4 people that they used to know or at least see every week.
  5. https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/health/2021/09/15/covid-pandemic-vaccinations-masks-biden-administation/8340559002/ That's the confirmed number - the real number is surely much higher, especially when you consider that many of the early deaths were never logged. I... I don't even know what to say.
  6. Or she could've respected your one simple request. You're not a bad daughter, and I think you know that. You're a good mom.
  7. I get it, I do, but... this is clearly causing ongoing pain if you can't stop thinking of this harm, you've only recently begun realizing you're not at fault, and it's made you deeply question your self-worth. I think you need to bite the bullet and find somebody new, or prepare to pay out of pocket for the old one. She may be willing to see you on a sliding scale if funds really are an issue.
  8. You might also seek out a support group of people who have survived the same type of harm you have. Whatever it is, it's not shameful and you are definitely not alone. There are other people who have been in the same place, gone through the same thing, and can help you find your own way to heal. Those two suggestions are not mutually exclusive. You really should do both those things.
  9. I would not say that it's a given that "carrying around pain and anger only hurts yourself", nor that the only way (or at least the best way) to rid yourself of pain and anger that burdens you is to forgive the person who harmed you. I wouldn't say any of that at all. Those are some widely held cultural assumptions, but that doesn't mean it's true. But if these feelings are upsetting you, you should seek out a licensed therapist. NOT a "Christian therapist" - it's okay to have a shrink who is Christian, of course, but people who advertise themselves that way are typically untrained amateurs who put up a shingle to scam the faithful, and often do more harm than good.
  10. Newer research has shown that cranberries are... perhaps not "debunked" but not nearly as useful as all that. I'm not saying don't take it if you want to, but don't feel obligated if you don't.
  11. It's not just measles. With the shutdown, a lot of young kids are behind on ALL their routine vaccinations, because of course if you're not going anywhere, well child visits to get preventative vaccines are just not your top priority. If you're reading this comment and uncomfortably thinking "Well... surely it hasn't been THAT long...." then it probably has and you should make that appointment, fess up to your pediatrician, and see about getting back on schedule.
  12. Note: It's true that the fastest growing group of diagnosed patients with lung cancer are non-smokers, however, that's not because the lung cancer rate in non-smokers is increasing, it's because as the number of patients who smoke goes down we're investing more resources into looking at non-smokers.
  13. Is it possible that the virus you had triggered a latent or not-so-latent case of asthma, and that's the ultimate cause of this cough?
  14. A letter and some physical photographs, perhaps a drawing of the house by your child as well. LOL, I read a true story once about somebody who found a note written on the wall under the wallpaper telling them how many rolls of paper it took to cover the room!
  15. Ieta_cassiopia and others: Just a note, what the UK calls "learning disabilities" is what the USA calls "intellectual disability" or, formerly, "mental retardation" (a now dispreferred term). USA learning disabilities are learning *differences* in the UK.
  16. I, too, am a member of the "You can sell and buy peeves?" club!
  17. Reuters signup is free. It's not a paywall, it's a sign-up-for-free wall
  18. It's okay to think about yourself a little. If you don't, who will? You're not being selfish, you're being *human* - a human in a really crappy situation without many good options. It sounds awful.
  19. I did, in fact, know about barefooters.org. The fact that the health department doesn't give a darn about your bare feet in stores is one of the many things as a child that taught me my One Essential Rule of Life: The more people say a thing without any form of proper citation, the more likely it is to be utter garbage. YES, it is legal to have a signature that is not cursive. YES, it is legal to go into a store barefoot (though the store owner can set a rule against it). YES, it is legal to drive barefoot (though I take no stand over whether or not that's a good idea). Over the years I've seen people confidently assert that people were "jaywalking" when close examination of the evidence shows that they were crossing legally (nobody knows the laws for pedestrians, it seems), that certain words were defined in the dictionary a certain way when they weren't (the most common one here is "marriage", but non-political ones pop up too), that various studies show the exact opposite of what they actually show, that names have fallen out of fashion during a time period when they actually became more popular (the name Katrina got a slight bump after the hurricane) or that they fell because of an association with particular people (it's true that the name Adolf dropped out of use in the USA after WWII... but it had already been in steep decline ever since the height of German immigration tailed off, along with all the other German-origin names, a pattern that long precedes the war) and all sorts of other little bits of received wisdom that, when you look at it closely, nobody can actually tell you where they got it from. Most recently, we all learned that the "six feet distance for disease spread" number was garbage, based on a lot of outdated science and the conflation of two entirely different data points into one totally useless and false metric. So I sorta feel strongly about this one, lol! It's not about the shoes per se, it's about the fact that a lot of people rather uncritically pass around falsehoods without any thought whatsoever.
  20. Though, to be clear, the health department where you live doesn't care if you wear shoes OR a shirt to the store. You can write to them and ask. The store is allowed to set its own policy, but the health department could not care less.
  21. Honestly, I think if you worry too much about what's "in" or trendy, your home will look like a dated showpiece sooner rather than later. If you just get what you like, and suit it to your own personal tastes, then your home will look comfortable and lived in.
  22. What even is "typical" in these covid days anyway? Let's see. Pre-pandemic, the one kid was out the door at 8-ish to get to school at 9:30, the latest start time that school was offered. (In NYC, most of the old big high schools were broken up, and now there are multiple schools in the same building, each with a different start time.) Their school is relatively close to home, only 15 minutes once they get off the boat. (Neither kid wanted to go to school on the Island, and ironically that kiddo would likely have had to get up even earlier if they'd gone to our nearest school, because that school starts at the horrible hour of 7:30!) The other one was leaving at 5:45 because their school starts a bit earlier and is in midtown instead of the lower east side, and for all these reasons I actually advised against it, but it was her first choice school and she loves it, so shows what I know. They both did as much homework as possible on the trip home. The older one went to a progressive school where the emphasis was on authentic learning and they didn't do much homework. The other is at an arts school where the emphasis is on art, and it turns out they have a LOT of kids with learning disabilities so the also have a balanced idea of the appropriate homework load for their students. Can't talk to you about clubs - the one kid isn't a joiner, and the other was home for the pandemic before she had a chance to join any clubs.
  23. That all sounds so upsetting for her and vicariously frustrating for you! I hope she does find a better church, then.
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