Dude. "Because" is exactly the non-answer your question deserved.

Probably something about Santa being a lie. And now that I've said that, I'm gonna immediately remove myself from this thread.

Two thoughts. First, the word "antisocial" has a negative connotation that "introverted" doesn't always have. Secondly, who the heck told you that and why? Because gosh, how rude!

I'm strongly tempted to suggest he should take six weeks off of work while you go on a tropical vacation. Let him handle all the onsite parenting, all the time. Might not be too practical, though. Edit: I feel like I may have been a bit more sardonic than usual lately. I apologize. Everybody else's advice is good.

Our pharmacist told us that everything, literally everything is backordered and on shortages. Whether you have to pick it up from the pharmacist or can grab it off the shelf, if it's medicine, there's a shortage. She looked really frazzled, too, so I believe it.

I mean, the last time I quit a therapist I just flat-out ghosted him. But that's probably because I actually was not, in fact, in a good place at the time.

I sure hope vinegar and baking soda aren't enough to dissolve a plastic toy train, no matter where it might be. I cook with those things!

Well... we've talked about how frostbite and hypothermia are not valid sartorial choices (and, two summers in a row, how heat stroke isn't one either) and how rude it is to comment on other people's clothing unless it's obviously something they'd want to be told (like "your small child accidentally tucked her skirt into her panties when she left the toilet stall", as one conversation I've actually had, and "hey, sweet kicks!" as another conversation I've had more often) but otherwise no. Definitely not. I've witnessed creeps perving on people who were *definitely* covered up. I don't think your clothing choices make a difference there - and even if they did, I don't really think that the existence of pervy creeps in the streets should mean they get to live rent-free in your head as well. Also, we're all sex-positive atheists over here, so... I mean... yeah. They seem capable of following a dress code when a dress code is called for.

A nice hasselbacked butternut squash looks a lot fancier than it really is.

We didn't do stockings as children, and I never really wanted to do them with the kids, so the answer is "nobody, and that's the way I like it". I think from your post it sounds like you don't really mind the tradition that you started and keep on doing, but if you do, it's okay to put your foot completely down and say "Listen, I cannot do all the stockings. I will only do XYZ stockings, and you all have to figure out a system for handling everybody else's stockings." - like, maybe secret santa it or something?

Yeah, I do, but I don't think my plan is very helpful to you. It's basically "Read what I want to read, when I want to read it, try to remember that it's not a good thing to be a completionist if it's not making you happy"

Most Americans live and work in fairly safe places and would not benefit from this sort of thing. As always, most victims of violent crime are harmed by people they already know - usually family members.

Probably easier to just tell her you'll give her minimum wage for however long it takes to get through your pile of presents.

She didn't lie because she doesn't understand that it's wrong to tell your parents you're not staying awake in bed listening to an audiobook when you ought to be asleep or that you shouldn't tell them you didn't use the dishwasher when you did. She lied because she didn't want to get into trouble. She knows that it wasn't the most morally upright action, and probably already felt a little bad about it even as she did it. If you give an excessive punishment, your child feels they have no recourse but to be dishonest. Then they lie. Everything you said here sounds age appropriate. I mean, obviously we don't want our kids to do it, but it's perfectly commonplace and normal, and overreaction is only going to make things worse. You will get better results with a punishment that fits the crime - a serious talk about how disappointed you are that she resorted to lying about something that, at the end of the day, was really rather trivial, and a resolution that until she gets over the bad habit, you'll be supervising more closely. Watching when she washes dishes, putting the electronics carefully away at the end of the night rather than trusting her to do it. That's really all you need to do, and it sends the message better than something big and showy which will only confirm to her that she made the right decision when she chose to be dishonest.

Not to dogpile here, but shawthorne, you need to reconsider. What you're talking about doing - four years no electronics, no presents for Christmas but a literal lump of coal - that starts to look less like appropriate discipline and more like emotional abuse. And I'm not loving the way you're talking about her either. "Her favorite trick"? Do you think she was forgetting to wash the dishes because she's trying to be a jerk? Is it her job to wash the dishes? I'm not clear on this. If it's her job, I think it'd be better to unban her from the dishwasher and to simply watch her as she loads it up and make sure she doesn't miss anything or put it in weirdly.

Most multivitamins don't contain iodine. She can take a separate iodine and potassium pill, or she could just, idk, eat some snack seaweed packets every week. You don't need *that* much iodine, really. I'm not saying this will cure the hair issue or has anything to do with it at all. I'm only saying this to be clear that if your multivitamin does not specifically say it has iodine, it certainly does not.

I cook something I like but they don't, and I call them up for a few minutes. And then I read, baby. I read, and read, and read until I can read no more! Also, I snuggle my animals. While reading! (I'm very easy to please. Just give me a library of books, and I'm off.) Although this year I've already told the kids that there is a nonzero chance that I'll give them all gift cards and hole up in my room. (And read.) They're adults (or nearly), my mom just died, I'm not really feeling it. I also said my new year's resolution is to stop saying "my mom just died and I'm not really feeling it" about things I don't want to do, but we'll see if that lasts. For the past ten years my resolution was "no moving furniture" and nobody in my family really respects that, so I don't think they can hold me to this resolution.

Caveat: if you're particularly scatterbrained and somehow or other absentmindedly drop the knife or put it in the sink and then put a heavy dish on top of it, or maybe wedge it in in a weird way, you can anticipate the blade breaking. This can be extremely frustrating and a little embarrassing.

Okay, well, that all sounds like a problem he should take to his therapist.

You didn't do anything wrong. Honestly, you've gone above and beyond for these people when they're not your family nor your current spouse's family. Secondly - emotions run high at these times and people say irrational things. I don't know all the history with all these people, but if you want to be kind to them and charitable you should try to remember that. Just keep saying it until you can pretend you believe it. Thirdly - goodness, put your phone on mute for a while and go do something for yourself! That sounds like a lot of stress over a short period of time, and also like these ridiculous complaints from other people are still eating your brain. Like, if that one man didn't want names mentioned then he could've volunteered to take over the obit writing, but I notice he didn't, so oh well. You can just ignore any forthcoming complaints.

Be sure to also get a kitchen sharpener, and remember that even if you consistently sharpen before use they still need to go to a professional regularly.

The question to ask is not "is this normal" but "is this a symptom of generally controlling behavior in an unhealthy relationship" and "do I want to do this?" If the answer to both those questions is "yes" then I think the thing to do is to say "Sure, I'll call!" and make an honest attempt to remember to do so when you get home. If remembering is a problem, then perhaps try setting a reminder on your phone for some time after when you expect to be home but before you'll be in bed. If, however, the answer to either question is "no" then the response should have been "No, I'm not going to do that." Arguing about whether or not this is "normal" is beside the point and, I think, counterproductive. It turns the conversation from something straightforward and simple to something altogether thorny and messy about who is more normal. And you can't win that argument, so there's no point in starting it. You just spend time on an unpleasant discussion. Worse, by opening the field to discussion you create the impression that if this behavior IS normal then it is also reasonable and you are the one who should acquiesce, whether or not you want to. And, of course, when you forget to call then it looks less like an accident and more like weird passive-aggressive garbage. And I believe that it *was* an accident, but if you hadn't had a pointless argument and had only said "no" to something you didn't want to do then it would not have looked otherwise.

I'm so glad you enjoyed yourself!

If he was the first or the last you'd think he'd like rain and wet feet a bit more.

We're not annoyed by you. Or, if anybody is, that person is presumably skipping all these posts and reading something else, so whatever. I promise.