Popular Post Amber in SJ Posted February 17, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted February 17, 2016 Some of you will remember my posting a few weeks ago that my mom was diagnosed with cancer. In January the oncologist told us that if we did nothing my mom would have 2 months; if we had surgery, an aggressive radiation regime and 6 rounds of chemo we would have a year. A year seemed like a reasonable trade off. My baby sister is due in April, my daughter is the first grandchild getting married in May, and my mom's quarter horse is due to foal in March. I spent the next three weeks giving her round the clock care, sleeping in the bed with her or sleeping in a chair at her hospital bed. No matter what we did the cancer was ahead of us and she passed on Sunday. I could never list all the things she taught me but here are a few that come to mind: 1. Books are your friends. My mom not only taught us to read, but taught us to love reading. She read aloud to us long after most parents stop reading to their children. It is a priceless gift. 2. Bending doesn't mean breaking. I am still working on this one as it is in direct opposition to the "stand your ground" directive learned from Dad. 3. Being a mom means being in your child's corner no matter what. What other 3rd grader could walk home from school in the middle of the day because the teacher was "mean" and know that Mom would not get mad? What other 6th grader could miss every Monday in the school year and mom would call in an excuse week after week after week? My quiet, reserved and a little bit shy mom would take on teachers, principals & school districts for her kids' well being. 4. Words matter. Mom banned the word "stupid" from Dad's vocabulary because she didn't want to damage our self-esteem. I can still remember Dad's face turning purple as he tried to find a replacement word when we were, in fact, being stupid. No name calling of any kind was allowed. In addition to "stupid" mom also banned the word "hate." We were not allowed to say we hated things like onions nor were we allowed to say we hated our siblings. Hate was reserved for something so big and monstrous that she hoped we'd never encounter it. Sorry Mom, I am finally saying it. I hate cancer. 5. Everyone deserves kindness. Everyone. It is not our job to figure out who deserves love and kindness; it is only our job to give it. This is only a small part of what I learned from my mother. I miss my Momma. It was a privilege to take care of her. Amber in SJ 94 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so very sorry. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILiveInFlipFlops Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry, Amber. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: My mom is 85, and I see her growing more feeble. It breaks my heart because I feel like I need her as much as ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daria Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I am so sorry. What you've written is a beautiful testimony to a beautiful person. Her wonderfulness and your love come shining through. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplejackmama Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry. Thanks for sharing the life lessons your incredible mom gave you. I hate this for your family. Cancer sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThisIsTheDay Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: I'm sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippen Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :crying: :crying: :crying: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcadia Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TCB Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 So sorry. Your mom sounds like a lovely lady. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaeFlowers Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El... Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry. Your post is lovely. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennyD Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry, Amber. Thank you for sharing a little bit of your mom with us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tsuga Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry. I'm thinking of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melmichigan Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: I'm sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 She sounds like a wonderful woman and I can't imagine how much you miss her. Hugs to your whole family during this difficult time :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkyandtheBrains. Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 She sounds like a wonderful mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
school17777 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry for your loss. ((((Hugs)))) Sounds like you had a good mom who taught you some good lessons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnMyOwn Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry, Amber. She sounds like she was a great mom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry for the hole that her parting will leave in your life. Sounds like she was a really good mom. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeWillSoar Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: I'm very sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: I'm so very sorry for your loss. :grouphug: Those are wonderful lessons and it sounds like she was a wonderful mom. Allow yourself to grieve, but also hold on to the good, as you are doing by thinking of the life lesson gifts she left with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ikslo Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacia Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: So very sorry for your loss. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsWeasley Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 So sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry you didn't get more time with her, but sounds like you made the most of the time you had. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so very sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 My condolences to you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legomom Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 So sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: I am so sorry. :crying: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chelle in MO Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 She sounds like a wonderful mom. I'm so sorry for your loss. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 What a fabulous, wise mom! I wish I could've met her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldberry Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 5. Everyone deserves kindness. Everyone. It is not our job to figure out who deserves love and kindness; it is only our job to give it. This one's my favorite. Thank you for sharing all those things. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mominco Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: So sorry for your loss! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom31257 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: I'm so very sorry for your loss! Like so many have said, thank you for sharing how precious she was. I lost my mom 2 years ago this month. I will be praying for you to have peace and comfort! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne in ABQ Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry, Amber, that you're having to go through this. It's so hard. Keep hanging on to those warm memories. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 (Hugs) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corraleno Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 What a lovely tribute, Amber. Thank you for sharing her with us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin M Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Hugs! Thank you for sharing such a beautiful tribute to your mom and your family! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Hugs Amber. I am sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I am so very sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: I am so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your mom's wisdom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reefgazer Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother. And that is a really beautiful tribute to her; she sounds like a wonderful woman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loesje22000 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 I'm sorry for your loss, And agree it is a lovely post, Sorry you have to miss her! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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