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Can I vent and cry? Just a little.

BlsdMama

By BlsdMama,
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BlsdMama

BlsdMama

Posted
Posted

This month sucks.  I officially love/hate May.

 

Got the Lyme test - positive.  Four bands and an indeterminate.  That's darn near CDC positive.  Have orders for antibiotics and a PICC.

 

Had my Neuro appt. Tuesday.  They referred me to the ALS Clinic with a three year temporary diagnosis of PLS.  It becomes permanent if I don't develop ALS in the next three years.  The clock has started.


I am wiped out - mostly just emotionally.

We have the big graduation ceremony tonight for DS #1.  I should be so excited.  But I am really emotional today and my throat hurts so bad I could cry.  

I should feel so happy today and instead I feel really sad.  I am going to bawl my way through this damn ceremony if I can't get a grip on this.  I hate this. I hate super sensitive emotions.  I hate crying in front of people.

 

All of it.  i hate all of it.  

 

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Guest

Guest

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Agree with a nap! That should help very much with your coping, as much as it can anyway. There is only so much cope you can fling at crazy ;)

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Liz CA

Liz CA

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Of course you are wiped out. Didn't you just have a daughter's wedding as well?

So, it's Lyme and that is good since they can treat it. What does it mean to have a temporary diagnosis for ALS? They are still not sure if it's only Lyme?

 

For the throat, perhaps gargle with salt water and get some cough drops with honey in them.

It will likely be a beautiful ceremony, cry if you want to!  :grouphug:

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mommyoffive

mommyoffive

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Of course you are wiped out. Didn't you just have a daughter's wedding as well?

So, it's Lyme and that is good since they can treat it. What does it mean to have a temporary diagnosis for ALS? They are still not sure if it's only Lyme?

 

For the throat, perhaps gargle with salt water and get some cough drops with honey in them.

It will likely be a beautiful ceremony, cry if you want to!  :grouphug:

 

 

This was my question too. 

 

Sending some hugs your way.

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Anne in CA

Anne in CA

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Your life has been a real roller coaster. Even without the health issues having your oldest children become adults while still actively parenting littles would be A LOT for anyone. You are entitled to hard time feeling happy. I am pretty sure you won't take advantage, lol. You are a winner. You'll be back to your self pretty soon, I bet. 

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Katy

Katy

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Feel free to continue to come back and complain as the side effects from the antibiotics kick in.  They made us all feel worse for the entire time we were one them.  Lots of water and rest and venting.

 

Personally thanking God you have Lyme.  Hope that's all it is and the ABX will kick in soon and make you feel remarkably better immediately.

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Seasider

Seasider

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Goodness you have earned a cry!

 

I am praying that the abx will successfully kick out the Lyme and any other tickborne junk so that the folks at the PLS clinic just scratch their heads and think what's she doing here? She's fine....

 

I agree with the others - eat a cookie, take a nap.

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SarahW

SarahW

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BlsdMama, have you gotten any prescription relief? You have nerve symptoms? Nerve pain?

 

I'm waiting for my appt with the Lyme clinic, but my doc did put me on a scrip for nerve pain. I think the brand name in America is Eleve? Amphiti....something. Helps nerve pain, and anxiety, and moods, and sleep, and other stuff. It's great. I can get out of bed and do stuff now. And not feel like yelling at everyone, and then weeping because I hurt, but it's hard to say how it hurts, which is even sadder.

 

Anyways, don't know how far away treatment is for you. But it's worth asking your regular doc for something to ease your mind and your symptoms in the meantime. Before this all happened i had friends who would post FB memes about their struggles with chronic pain and/or chronic illness, and I was totally sympathetic and all, but I was still like "well, yeah, that's tough," No, chronic pain and chronic illness is absolutely horrid. Totally horrible. Beyond horrendous. If your doc can find you a good med that helps you, even temporarily, I think it's worth it.

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Jean in Newcastle

Jean in Newcastle

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BlsdMama, have you gotten any prescription relief? You have nerve symptoms? Nerve pain?

 

I'm waiting for my appt with the Lyme clinic, but my doc did put me on a scrip for nerve pain. I think the brand name in America is Eleve? Amphiti....something. Helps nerve pain, and anxiety, and moods, and sleep, and other stuff. It's great. I can get out of bed and do stuff now. And not feel like yelling at everyone, and then weeping because I hurt, but it's hard to say how it hurts, which is even sadder.

 

Anyways, don't know how far away treatment is for you. But it's worth asking your regular doc for something to ease your mind and your symptoms in the meantime. Before this all happened i had friends who would post FB memes about their struggles with chronic pain and/or chronic illness, and I was totally sympathetic and all, but I was still like "well, yeah, that's tough," No, chronic pain and chronic illness is absolutely horrid. Totally horrible. Beyond horrendous. If your doc can find you a good med that helps you, even temporarily, I think it's worth it.

 

Amitriptyline is an anti-depressant which is used in low doses for some chronic illness pain.

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SarahW

SarahW

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Amitriptyline is an anti-depressant which is used in low doses for some chronic illness pain.

 

Yes! that's how you spell it!

 

It was the drug that was an anti-depressant before SSRI's or something. At low doses it is used for lots of things because of how it works chemically. 

 

Few or mild side effects - unlike the Tramadol I tried, which left me shaking and nearly passed out. That was a very not-fun day.

 

And not addictive - unlike the Valium my doc suggested. Can we exhaust other possibilities first? 

 

 

Maybe because my Lyme is open-and-shut (I seem to fit perfectly in the thing called PTLD, right down to the timeline and symptoms) and I got a referral quickly and everything is covered by insurance, but I'm pretty blaise about it. In a few months I'll probably be pumped full of abx, but until then I just want to be half-functional please. Chemically, if necessary.

 

 

Unrelenting symptoms really grind a person down. Just want to make sure the OP knows that I don't see any shame in asking her doctor for a bit of help there. There's only so much a person can tough out until they're empty.

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Jaybee

Jaybee

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:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:  I hope you are feeling better today. I can't remember the order, but I couldn't help but think, "Sandwich, shower, nap." Not because you are acting like a teenager (far from it!), but because it sounded like what you needed--a little space, a little comforting, a little rest.

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