AnnE-girl Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 I was thinking about this with the post about the Duchess of Cambridge still wearing her rings after giving birth. I had never heard of having your engagement ring soldered to your wedding ring until my sister learned it was common among her in-laws. I purposely chose a very plain band so that I could wear my wedding ring on its own when I don't want to worry about wearing my diamond engagement ring when changing diapers or cleaning around the house. I'm just curious what others have done and if it's a local custom. If it matters, I'm from a large suburban area in the Midwest and my sisters' in-laws are from a more rural area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Never heard of doing that. I'm midAtlantic, suburban. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, mine are soldered together. That was 21 years ago in Oregon for reference.The band is a crescent that wraps around the solitaire. I would never wear it on its own. I didn't like how they would separate sometimes and snag on things (usually when I was asleep), so they were soldered right after I started wearing them together. I never liked the set (long story on how I ended up with them) so at one point I thought about having them undone so I could just wear the solitaire or get a new wrap, but I don't know if they can do that or not. ...... Instead I got diamond earrings and put the ring into my jewelry box. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 I have a diamond engagement ring that was my great-grandmother's and then we chose what they called a "jacket"--a thin band with two diamonds that fit on either side of my engagement ring--for the wedding band. They are attached (soldering doesn't seem like the right word) and are like one ring with 3 diamonds in a row. I lived in CA at the time we chose the jacket; attaching the two permanently may have been the jeweler's recommendation (can't really remember). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barnwife Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 No. But I wear them on separate hands (engagement on the left, wedding on the right hand). I don't like the way they look together. They are gorgeous individually, but not together. Also, my fingers are way too short to wear both together. They are both very wide bands so it just looks funny to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loowit Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 My wedding ring is a wrap so it is made to go around my engagement ring. It wouldn't look right on its own. They were soldered together either right before or right after the wedding. It is too long ago now to remember which. My sister and best friend also have soldered their rings together. My brother's wife didn't because her wedding band is plain white gold band which didn't really fit with her engagement ring which is black hills gold. They are both very pretty but she rarely wears them together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheres Toto Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Mine are soldered together. I had never heard of it until dh mentioned getting it done - 10 years ago in NJ. Mine is actually three bands total. My engagement ring is in the middle and I think they did refer to it as a "jacket" when it was done. My engagement ring is a solitary diamond with a band that forms a diamond shape around the diamond, then crosses over at each side before curving around my finger. The band has a groove pattern in it so you can clearly see how it crosses over. My two wedding bands each follow the shape of the engagement band so each has one point of the diamond. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hkpiano Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 First time I got married, my wedding band was a wrap like this: http://m.kay.com/en/kaystore/engagement---wedding/diamond-enhancer-ring-1-3-ct-tw-round-cut-10k-yellow-gold/100006/100006.100007.101013 So it had to be soldered to the engagement ring (solitaire). Now I have (second marriage) a princess cut solitaire and my wedding band is a plain white gold band. It's simple and pretty. I'm glad I kept them separate. After I had my first baby, I got really puffy from the fluids they pumped me with, and my wedding band is just slightly smaller than the engagement ring, so I took the band off but kept the engagement ring on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sara in AZ Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Mine are not soldered, but I never wear them separate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slartibartfast Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, mine are soldered together. My wedding ring is a wrap, it is made to go with the engagement ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edelweiss Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, mine are soldered. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melmichigan Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 No, mine aren't soldered. I've never taken off my wedding ring, which is a thick plain comfort wear band that matches DH's. I rarely wear my diamond ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amira Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 No, but it's typical where I'm from, or at least it was 20 years ago. :) 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Mine are because of the way the band is designed. The solitaire nestles into a nook of the band and I didn't want them separating and turning around my finger. I have no idea if it's a norm around here or with my family. It's never come up. I've never had a problem wearing my solitaire during pregnancy or in the course of housework or baby care. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiewindmomma Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 No; I want to be able to take off my engagement ring and wear just a plain band when traveling. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delighted3 Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Mine are soldered together. I think this was considered the norm. At least the jeweler made it seem like the thing to do. I never questioned it. I wore the engagement ring up until right before the wedding and then we had them soldered together right before the ceremony. Married 26 years ago in mid size metropolitan area in midwest. Joy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, mine has a jacket, and the jeweler recommended that. If the rings rub against each other, they won't last as long. I actually have a band that found at a thrift store that I wear sometimes. Especially during canning season and when fishing and snorkling, I put the good one into the safety deposit box and wear the plain one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nevergiveup Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Never got a wedding ring and don't wear my engagement ring. Nonetheless, I have never heard of soldering them together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KrissiK Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, of course. My wedding band and engagement ring are soldered together, but like others have mentioned, they were made to go together. But when I got my anniversary band the jeweler wouldn't solder them together. I don't know why not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Many do, mine are not. I have man sized hands with big knuckles. I find it easier and more comfortable to get 2 thin rings off one at a time, than to get a wider band off. I take them off everyday to shower and often to clean or garden so I wouldn't want to fuss with a larger band and my knuckle. Also, sometimes I just wear one and I wouldn't want to give up the option to do that. Ie: camping. I leave my solitaire at home when we go camping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Mine aren't. I have an old-fashioned plain solitaire diamond that is set fairly high. There are lots of occasions where I would not want to wear that for fear of catching it on something, but I would want to wear my wedding ring. But all of that is moot right now because I need to get my rings resized. The stress weight gain is as bad as pregnancy swelling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 My girlfriends and sister all have their wedding and engagement bands attached. They had them done almost immediately after getting married, on the recommendations of their jewelers. We are all in OR, married 20-25 years ago. I only have one ring, so not attached. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ananda Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Um, no. . . My husband and I were poor college students when we got engaged/married. I am anti-diamond anyway. We each have a simple white gold engagement/wedding ring. My husband still wears his. When I got pregnant, my ring became too small. I bought a basic ring for $7 at target and wear that now. For awhile I wore the "real" ring on a chain around my neck, but that got annoying and when I still couldn't wear the ring post-pregnancy I stopped. Now it is . . . somewhere. Ananda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
73349 Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 No, never occurred to us. They're simple and not a set (bought in different states, actually). When I couldn't wear my rings toward the end of pregnancy (or very occasionally when doing messy work), I put them on a necklace chain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
6packofun Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 No, because I like to wear mine separate sometimes. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluemongoose Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 My first set was. It nestled together, so it would never have worked to not have them soldered. Had to replace them because I was allergic to the band. Now my new set isn't. I like being able to wear the band without the diamond when I am busy around the house. I do wear them both when out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Southern Ivy Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 My set is soldered together. I dropped it off after the honeymoon to be put together. Married for 4 years, had it done in Arkansas.Almost everyone I know who has a matching set has it done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kroe1 Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, soldered. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maela Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Like the OP, I never had mine soldered. I wanted to be able to wear them separately. When we backpacked for a couple of months in Africa and Europe, I left my diamond engagement ring at home and only wore my wedding band. Most of the time I wear them at the same time. I was married in CA eleven years ago. I don't think my mom has here soldered either... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted May 6, 2015 Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yes, mine are soldered together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HS Mom in NC Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Yes. I have my wedding band, engagement ring and 10 year anniversary band soldered together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Yes, mine are. I don't wear my original plain band, but wear a ring my husband gave to me for our tenth anniversary. It and my engagement ring are soldered together. There is a very practical reason - the setting on the engagement rings rubs the setting on the anniversary ring and loosens one of the stones on my anniversary ring. Soldering stabilized them so that it doesn't happen anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 No. I don't have an engagement ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 My mother's are, and she got a replacement band years ago and just wears that most of the time. Mine aren't and I just wear the wedding band. I had too many pins bend on my setting when I tried to wear the engagement ring, and I was afraid of losing the stone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Mine are not soldered together, but I wear them together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenNC Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Yes. My engagement ring is rose gold from 1902 (husband's great-grandmother's engagement ring we had set with a diamond taken my great-great-aunt's engagement ring--he had the setting with no stone and I didn't care for the setting in the ring I had inherited). We had a slightly curved band made in rose gold to match it and they are soldered together to keep them in the correct orientation and prevent damage to the engagement ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jar7709 Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Mine are not. They are also different metals and don't nest together very well, so I don't know if they even can be. I never looked into it. I sometimes just wear the plain wedding band and leave the engagement ring behind since it has a more delicate stone (it isn't a diamond). My mother's and sister's are soldered, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Mine were soldered 22 years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I had mine soldered shortly after marriage, 20 years ago. However, I don't wear my wedding rings most of the time. I wear an anniversary band. It is a filigree pattern with tiny diamonds and it is flat. I don't love the high profile of my diamond engagement ring, so I don't wear it for everyday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 No, mine are not soldered together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VeganCupcake Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Mine aren't, but they probably should be. I never wear them separately, but now I don't even remember why I chose not to have them soldered. I do remember it was a conscious choice, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Mine are soldered, 14 years. My mom's are soldered, 42 years. My rings are taller/heavier on top so the wedding ring kept twisting under. I had them soldered because the diamond naturally stops at my fingers on either side so can't rotate completely into my palm area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcadia Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Mine aren't. My mom's aren't either. I don't know if my MIL has an engagement ring as she mentioned they were very poor when she married. My engagement ring is a simple solitaire that would have snag my sweaters. My wedding ring is a simple band so that is easy for everyday wear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Certainly not regional. :-) I've heard of people doing that--my mother did--although I wouldn't, for the same reason that you wouldn't. :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I only have a wedding band. DH made such a fuss about the cost of jewellery compared to the actual cost of gold that I told him not to bother with an engagement ring but I insisted on a wedding ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cottonwood Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I have 2 diamond anniversary bands on each side of a diamond solitaire so I requested they be soldered to keep the look I wanted of them being together facing the right direction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynn Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 No, I wear band, engagement ring, and 10year anniversary band. There is no problems with them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 No. I don't prefer the feel, and I like fiddling with them. I also wear only the band if my hands get swollen (pregnancy, heat, etc.). 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jerico Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Nope. The store said to come back after the wedding and they would but i didn't want them done. This was in denver, colorado. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 No. If I'm doing something rough that might smash my ring I take off the engagement ring and just wear the wedding band. If we're traveling I generally wear a fake ring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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