Is this normal?

[busymama7]

My daughter found a dog loose today that was very friendly and came right to her.   I took him to see if he was chipped and he wasn't.    I've posted everywhere I can think of.  He was in our backyard when my husband came home and he got all pissy about it and told me he had a right to be mad about a dog in our backyard.  (Note we have our own dog but it was begrudgingly and he is pissy about her all the time too).  We got in a fight over it and I left to take the dog to the shelter to try to get rid of the problem but it was already closed.   We drove around and asked neighbors etc and haven't found where he's from.   I had told my daughter when she found him that we had 24 hrs to try to find an owner and then we would have to turn him in.  I was frustrated with the inconvenience but I recognize that my daughter is kind hearted and trying to do the right thing and so I was trying to do the right thing and model what that is.  My husband was mad and said we should have just left him running the streets and not care if he got hit. Not our problem essentially.  

I am still mad and haven't gone home yet. My daughter has the dog in her car and is trying to find someone who will take him overnight because she doesn't want to deal with her dad being mad either.  

This kind of thing isn't abnormal for him and I am getting past done with dealing with it.  My question I guess is, is this typical? Do most people not try to help loose dogs and/or be pissed if someone in their house brings one home temporarily while making a good faith effort to find owners?  I had no intention of trying to keep him and everyone knew that. I was just trying to protect him as was my daughter.  

I honestly am not sure if most people would have tried to help or ignored it or what? 

[Not_a_Number]

I would say both of your stances are normal, but the fact that this is causing a major fight shows serious tension in the marriage. I'm sorry 😕 . 

[dirty ethel rackham]

I couldn't imagine not trying to help a lost animal.  If I see a loose dog out while I'm driving, I'll pull over and try to see if the owner is nearby.  If I can't get close enough to get the animal, I try to take a pic to post on lost dog sites with the location of where it was seen.  We have had several dogs in our yard who have gotten away from their owners and I have kept the dog with us as we helped find the owners.  Fortunately, I haven't had to keep one for more than an hour as the owners have come looking pretty quickly.  

[Ausmumof3]

I don’t think it’s normal as in I don’t think most people would react that way, but DH does get funny about some animals that we’ve tried to help. To be fair to him though, dd would be an animal hoarder if we didn’t limit it a bit. It was mostly the cat that was frustrating because he agreed to it then spent the rest of the cats life complaining and it caused issues for everyone including the cat. I’m not keen for another animal that he’s not 100pc on board with because I can’t deal with conflict over stupid stuff like that.

 

eta I don’t think leaving the dog to run the streets is normal. Most people would at least make a call to the council/pound if they weren’t going to help. Does he have some other stressors making him unusually snappy?

Edited March 4, 2023 by Ausmumof3

[busymama7]

Yes he's stressed but this is the same kind of thing that is always a thing. I guess I should learn and not try to help.  But then that pisses me off because I shouldn't have to not do something reasonable because he is unreasonable.  

[Spryte]

We always try to help animals who are running loose, so I think that’s normal. I’m sorry it turned into a bad experience for you.

 

[MercyA]

It would be normal for the "animal people" I know to help the dog. I also know plenty of people who would not have bothered.

Trying to find a lost animal's owner is absolutely the right thing to do--for the dog, the owner, the community. It is kind. It is helpful. It is good. 

I'm sorry your husband is reacting this way, but try not to let it keep you and your daughter from doing the right thing. You're a good mom and human being.

In my rural area, there are two different Facebook groups for lost and found animals. You might try searching for and posting on one. I don't have a Facebook account but can still read the notices. Hold back a detail about the dog if you post (for example, an unusual marking) to help verify that anyone who claims him is actually the owner. (ETA: Sorry, missed that you said you've posted everywhere you can think of. Good job.)

Edited March 4, 2023 by MercyA

[Corraleno]

I don't think I know anyone who wouldn't try to help a lost animal. I and/or my kids have rescued all kinds of animals; my kids once found a wild duck that was struggling to walk and DS carried it a couple of miles home while little DD pushed both their bikes (we took it to a wildlife rehabber who said that unfortunately it had been poisoned). I've rescued injured birds, lizards, a turtle, a snake, and a bat, and taken in multiple stray cats. I've caught 2 loose dogs in my current neighborhood; the first I kept until the owner could come get it (phone # was on the collar), and the 2nd one DD helped me catch, and then we walked all over the neighborhood knocking on doors until we found the owner. My own dog got out through a hole in the fence once and thank God a kind person took him in and called the # on his collar.

I can understand someone who really hates dogs (or is afraid of them) not wanting a stray inside their house, but not letting it stay in the back yard and saying it would be better to leave it running around to get hit by a car? I'd have a hard time dealing with that.

Edited March 4, 2023 by Corraleno

[fraidycat]

I think most people would have tried to help.

A few would ignore it.

A very tiny minority would get pissed off about someone else trying to help a helpless animal. That's not in any way normal.

I'm sorry his sh!tty mood made your and DDs day harder to deal with. 

[Jean in Newcastle]

I think that the real question would be is "is it moral?"  And I would say "no".  I don't think that everyone has to have animals or has to like animals.  But to allow an animal safe haven for a short period of time where it doesn't cause you harm in any way, is a moral thing to do. 

[Kassia]

I think most people would help in some way.  I'm sorry about the conflict.

[Katy]

I think it’s normal to help or not help. It isn’t normal to get that angry about it. 

[Carrie12345]

My husband has a complicated relationship with animals, so I could imagine him getting agitated/frustrated, but he also tried to help me catch a loose dog a couple of months ago, so that part of him does win out.

I get very nervous dealing with stray animals because it is EXTREMELY difficult to get a rescue to step up here, because they’re so full. If I can’t find an owner quickly, I could be stuck. I still begrudgingly do what I can. Sigh.

[HomeAgain]

I don't think it's normal to have such a lack of compassion that it angers you when other people act on their moral obligation.

I can say dh would not be pleased if we had a cat show up unexpectedly, but neither would he turn it out.  He realizes it's a domesticated animal who needs shelter and food, even though we could only provide it temporarily before finding more suitable arrangements.

I'm not even going to get into bringing a dog into the house.  After I tried to help a "stray dog" once, the rule is now that it must very, very, very much look like a retriever, beagle, akita, or other type of easily identifiable breed in order to make sure it's not a cute little coyote. 😄 (who also wanted nothing to do with me and ran off looking scared).

[marbel]

4 hours ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

I think that the real question would be is "is it moral?"  And I would say "no".  I don't think that everyone has to have animals or has to like animals.  But to allow an animal safe haven for a short period of time where it doesn't cause you harm in any way, is a moral thing to do. 

This. I know people who would be very upset to have a strange animal brought into their house/yard. I don't think they are abnormal because of that. But, helping a lost pet is the right thing to do. 

I'm wondering if he actually has a fear of dogs but masks it as intense dislike.  I like dogs but to be honest I am a little afraid of dogs I don't know. If I was alone and saw a dog wandering around I doubt I would try to bring it into my car or house for that reason. I would try to take a photo to post on a local neighborhood page, or knock on some doors or whatever. 

I'm sorry you are having this conflict. 

[pinball]

8 hours ago, busymama7 said:

This kind of thing isn't abnormal for him and I am getting past done with dealing with it.  My question I guess is, is this typical? Do most people not try to help loose dogs and/or be pissed if someone in their house brings one home temporarily while making a good faith effort to find owners? 

I think there is a spectrum of responses when people encounter a loose animal. It sounds like your DH far on the end of “don’t get involved.”

im sorry it is causing strife in your family.

If you were my friend, I’d be concerned that he doesn’t value what is important to you and your daughter. If he doesn’t care, it’s one thing. But to react so negatively is not good. That’s the part I’d address with him…to leave you and DD alone when you do something that you see as valuable and important. Even if he doesn’t agree with it

[pinball]

This happened in midFeb but we keep passing the pic around our family group texts

Pig in patrol car after people called for help bc they thought the pig “looked cold”

https://www.accuweather.com/en/winter-weather/pig-looked-cold-gets-ride-home-in-alaska-police-car/1485009

[I talk to the trees]

Aside from dd, my dogs are my world. We do everything together from exercise (canine enthusiasm is the best motivator for a daily 5k!) to pet therapy.(which allows me to share the joy they bring me with those who cannot have dogs.) They are truly my best friends, and I would be lost without them.

I try to be a responsible dog owner. My dogs are chipped, and they are never allowed off leash anywhere except their own fenced yard. Even so, accidents can happen. Leashes or harnesses can break, and in the blink of an eye, a dog can be off and away, chasing a rabbit or squirrel or chipmunk. This is one of my worst nightmares, but now I have a new one! 

It actually makes me nauseated to think that if one of my pups escaped, they would be found by a heartless creep like your dh - utterly devoid of compassion, and so cruel as to not care one iota about not just the well-being of another living creature, but the agony of the dog’s owner. (There could be a child out there crying their eyes out because their beloved pet is lost!) 

One night, and you are the one who will be caring for the animal until you can turn it over to a shelter or rescue? Your dh needs to put on the big boy undies and deal with this extremely minor inconvenience! The fact that your dd is afraid to upset her father is also concerning, but that’s another issue altogether. 

[catz]

I think it is normal to help.   I could see a spouse walking in at the end of the day into distraction and chaos might be a little grumpy about it.  But what is the expectation?   That you let this dog wander?   That isn’t reasonable.  Is this a stray dog specific issue or is he touchy about anything unexpected that comes down the line?   Like if he has an actual fear of dogs, I could see this as a trigger.   But if this extends to other things or is a temper issue, that seems problematic.   

[Mrs Tiggywinkle Again]

My husband would not be happy at all if we brought home a stray dog.  We have three dogs and he only wanted one and is very clear that there won’t be a fourth(to be fair I agree).  But neither would he let a dog run loose—he’d call the police non emergency line and they’d send an animal control officer to get the dog.  
But yeah—he’d be pissed if I brought home a stray dog and kept it for the night, and it would definitely be a problem.
I don’t know how he’d feel if we didn’t have the animal control option though. He’s not particularly an animal lover but neither would he want a dog hit by a car because we didn’t help it.  He just wouldn’t want it in our house.

My own dad would absolutely have not allowed a stray dog in the house.  He isn’t afraid of dogs but only tolerates their presence and never in a house.  He is very much an all animals belong outside kind of person. But again, I can’t see him just allowing a dog to run loose and be endangered, but we have after hours animal control here that will come get a dog. 

Edited March 4, 2023 by Mrs Tiggywinkle Again

[Grace Hopper]

It’s one thing to help an animal in need, especially if it’s happy in the yard for a few days. I’d say normal. 
 

It’s another thing to decide to cohabitate indoors with one, due to allergies, cost, not wanting pet hair on furniture, curtailed schedules due to the need to do pet care, etc. Also normal.

is it possible your dh’s reaction is due to the fact that he never wanted an indoor pet to begin with and fears he will now have not one, but two, if you and dd become attached to this dog?

Just chiming in from the position of someone who would like a canine companion but am married to a man who has no desire to have a live in pet. I tell my adult kids that things they should discuss when evaluating a potential spouse include attitudes towards religion, money, children, and pets. 

Edited March 4, 2023 by Grace Hopper

[Grace Hopper]

Oh, if you don’t have the Nextdoor app you may want to give it a try. The running joke is that it should actually be named Lost Pet Finder. You might find someone posted about the dog there. 

[HomeAgain]

4 minutes ago, Grace Hopper said:

is it possible your dh’s reaction is due to the fact that he never wanted an indoor pet to begin with and fears he will now have not one, but two, if you and dd become attached to this dog?

 

The fears are normal.

The reaction is...well, I would not call it normal or healthy to lash out in anger instead of communicating, particularly if the age indicates a full adult and not a 12yo child. Regardless of how a person feels, how they deal with those feelings are subject to societal norms for their age group.

[Spryte]

OP, you’ve been on my mind. I hope you are ok this morning, and that everything worked out.

I keep thinking of all the animals we’ve helped over the years, and the inconvenience some have caused, even on vacations — the inconvenience has been outweighed by the positives. And once, 20 years ago, our dogs got out when a worker left a gate open — and I am so grateful for the kids and mom who found them and called us.

However, I don’t bring unknown animals into our home because we have pets already. We use the yard, the garage, or call for help if we can’t easily find the owner within a few hours (in that time we will check for chips, make calls, post notices, and check with neighbors). 

My parents always helped animals, and we passed that on to our kids. We have a neighbor friend who is very afraid of dogs, and so she calls me when there’s a loose dog. I think maybe feeling afraid of unknown dogs is not uncommon, and also there are cultural expectations around helping animals (my neighbor friend is from a country with a lot of stray/wild dogs and helping them is not the culture but she’s happy to let her kids help me).

I think I’d want to have a conversation with DH to understand his were his feelings are coming from and to find a compromise for future situations. Use the backyard and you and DD will walk your current dog out front on a leash and be responsible for everything, or immediately call animal control, or something else that works for all.

I hope your morning is going better than the evening.

[Grace Hopper]

15 minutes ago, HomeAgain said:

The fears are normal.

The reaction is...well, I would not call it normal or healthy to lash out in anger instead of communicating, particularly if the age indicates a full adult and not a 12yo child. Regardless of how a person feels, how they deal with those feelings are subject to societal norms for their age group.

IAWY that his communication style is… less than mature. 

[Jaybee]

I like pets but am not as determined as some to bring one that I don't know into my house. I probably wouldn't pick one up, but would take pictures and post them somewhere, depending on the situation (in a dangerous area, etc.). 

Some people are not as interested in pets in general, and if a person feels forced into it when for whatever reason they don't want one (fear, dislike, etc.), I could see how some might dig in their heels and go overboard with it. It would bug me and cause me stress, but I think I'd try to understand and also ask, "Is this really about the dog?"

[stephanier.1765]

Some years ago, my DH would be mad and acting put out about it. Now that he's older, he's softened and that's affected his feelings and thoughts about animals. He's turned into the one bringing stray cats into our home. It feels strange for me to be the one saying, "OK, that's enough." LOL I'm still not sure if he would pull over to help a lost dog but he wouldn't be upset if I did. 

[KSera]

1 hour ago, I talk to the trees said:

It actually makes me nauseated to think that if one of my pups escaped, they would be found by [someone] like your dh - utterly devoid of compassion, and so cruel as to not care one iota about not just the well-being of another living creature, but the agony of the dog’s owner. (There could be a child out there crying their eyes out because their beloved pet is lost!) 

This devastated owner angle is the one I would focus on with someone who just doesn’t seem to care about animals. Perhaps he didn’t consider that there is likely to be a human desperately looking for the dog (I realize possibly not, but with a friendly dog, my first assumption would be this). If he doesn’t care that he could help avoid someone the pain of losing their dog either, I don’t know what to tell you 😢. I agree there might be a fear behind this. I hope the dog has found his owner at this point. 

Edited March 4, 2023 by KSera
Typo

[busymama7]

So the shelter was closed when I got there and we ended up having a neighbor of ours take him over night. I haven't heard at all from any of my postings.    We will take flyers to the neighborhood today and then by the time the shelter closes take him in if we haven't heard anything.

I'm not sure my husband knows what we did with it and I'm just ignoring it.  I know that's not much more mature but it is easier. He is busy today so won't notice or pay attention.  Which is why it's so stupid that he freaked out. It is not any inconvenience to him.  

[lulubelle]

It took my husband 2 years to like our dog. He grew up detached from pets and having a dog live outside and not be part of the family. It was a tough 2 years. He refused to take care of our dog in any way and just complained we weren’t training him well enough. I also think he was jealous of the attention the dog got.  At one point he even threatened that the dog needed to go. It was awful. We actually went and saw a therapist. It helped. He just decided to change his attitude and slowly began accepting the dog and liking the dog to loving the dog.  He has been working from home ever since the start of covid and he and the dog are totally attached to each other. A small miracle. 

[DeainUSA]

I don't think it's normal or not normal to help the dog. I do think if it's important to people you love to help, one should recognize that and not make a difficult situation harder.  I think that's the real issue. Especially if they trust that the spouse knows they cannot keep the dog, but is just trying to do the right thing.

[catz]

Like not everyone has the time, space, bandwidth or temprement to deal with a lost animal for extended of time either sad owner on the other end or not.    Like whoever commented above about having dogs already and not being able to bring another home that makes perfect sense to me.   There's also a difference between walking a loose dog back down a known neighbor's house and seeing a completely unknown dog on a non residential road as you're passing through.  The OP are obviously super kind with their follow up, but just because someone can't do all that in the moment doesn't mean they are horrible humans.    In general, I think most people are doing the best they can with the time and tools they have available to them.  A fear of dogs might lead someone to a different conclusion.  I mean people can make plenty of judgments about those not keeping their pets contained or even just dumping a pet because it's not like that is uncommon in some places.  I will also say my husband has a scar on his leg from a dog that a stupid owner last year had off leash on an urban trail early in the morning in the last couple years.  He is VERY twitchy about loose dogs now.  That cost him a doc trip, a round of antibiotics and a copay.   Approaching strange dogs isn't necessarily safe.  

For me personally, a dog could not come into our home.  We'd make a call/post on neighborhood newsgroups and maybe put it in our backyard for a little bit.  We have neighbors with dogs that would certainly do more we could likely pass a dog to that would be better set up if it was friendly.  But my spouse is allergic to a lot of dogs and we have 2 kind of fussy, diva, tempremental cats.  Kittens or a friendly cat?  Well all bets off there, DH might end up irritated. 😂

Edited March 4, 2023 by catz

[busymama7]

Oh I wanted to clarify.  He wasn't in the house at all.  Just in the back yard.  

 

[Amethyst]

Fortunately, I have not been in the position of seeing stray dogs around much. If there was a dog wandering in my neighborhood, I would assume he belonged to someone in the neighborhood and would eventually find his way home. If I was driving down a country road, on my way to wherever, again I would assume it got loose and would eventually find its way home. If I took it in my car, further away from its home, that would make it harder for owner to find him. If it looked injured, I would be concerned, but not every loose dog is lost. Also, I don’t like approaching strange dogs, even ones on leashes. 
 

A young child by themself…completely and totally different story!! I don’t regard dogs with the same level of concern as I would a child. I don’t think it’s immoral to not stop everything you’re doing to respond to a lost or wandering dog. 

[Rosie_0801]

Around here, people usually post on the local FB group at most, and often not even that much because dogs are always running around the streets here. Often the same ones over and over, along with goats, cattle, sheep and Doris the pig.

I'd be mighty ticked off if someone brought a dog home to my place. I do not want to spend my meagre budget on feeding them and my place is a haven for local birds, which I wouldn't want frightened off.

[Moonhawk]

We are not animal people; maybe me and the kids could be, but DH is anti-pets, especially anti-dog, due to stuff from his childhood. Plus, allergies.

Without hesitation, if we encountered a dog like that, and determined it wasn't rabid (lol), we would help. It wouldn't get in a car with us, but we'd pull over and walk it around houses in the area, and walk it to our house if close enough (like a couple miles). We'd call animal control if we were too far away. But, if we brought it to our house, it'd be outside in the yard with constant people and snacks making sure it was okay. 

I can see DH grumbling a bit in a "don't get attached" type of way, and be annoyed at the time and disruption to whatever was supposed to be going on, but not angry enough to pick at it with me, he'd agree that it's a living thing so it's the right thing to do. He'd just stay away from it and not be involved, really, but he wouldn't prevent us from helping. 

[Annie G]

I’m not a dog person so unless the animal was injured or distressed I likely wouldn’t do anything. Dh *might*. Neither would be angry if the other tried to find the owner.  I would be angry if dh decided he wanted to keep said stray dog, so if op’s dh thinks that might be where this is leading it could explain the reaction. 
 

[BusyMom5]

Will this dog not find his way home if you just leave him alone?  We live in the country, and if a dog finds its way to our house we tell the kids to ignore it so it will move on.  I might put a pic up on BF and call a few neighbors,  but otherwise I wouldn't bother it.  I wouldn't be putting it into a fenced area or driving it around- most animals have a decent sense of direction from.where they came from.  

Once in a while we get hunting dogs that stop by here- we usually know the owner and call him up if the dog stays more than a few hours.  If a pack of dogs goes after our chickens or cats, we run them off by yelling.   

[busymama7]

Just now, BusyMom5 said:

Will this dog not find his way home if you just leave him alone?  We live in the country, and if a dog finds its way to our house we tell the kids to ignore it so it will move on.  I might put a pic up on BF and call a few neighbors,  but otherwise I wouldn't bother it.  I wouldn't be putting it into a fenced area or driving it around- most animals have a decent sense of direction from.where they came from.  

Once in a while we get hunting dogs that stop by here- we usually know the owner and call him up if the dog stays more than a few hours.  If a pack of dogs goes after our chickens or cats, we run them off by yelling.   

I mean we are very urban.   Tons and tons of traffic. She called him to her because she was worried about him getting hit. And he came right over and is super friendly. He also wasn't out long.  Well groomed and clean etc.  

She talked to a neighbor who recognized him and took her number.  But the neighbor couldn't remember which house he belonged to.  Put up lots of signs and are keeping him for another day. Well our neighbor is.  

[teachermom2834]

I am not an animal person. I don’t particularly like dogs. I’m scared of big dogs and don’t much know what to do with any of them. I don’t have a fenced in yard. 
 

I do understand how much other people love their dogs and I do have compassion for living things and I do feel like I should help or do something but beyond calling the owner if I know the dog I really don’t feel there is much I can do. I have stood in our residential road and waved cars down to alert them of a dog in the road so they didn’t hit it. But no, I am not taking a dog into my home or garage or even getting very close. My dd will go out and corral a dog into a neighbor’s yard if she is available as she is a dog lover. But really I am not approaching an unknown dog.

Recently I had two dogs on my front porch (they soon ran off) that I figured came from somewhere in the neighborhood. I posted on the neighborhood FB page figuring I was alerting the owners they were out and someone could retrieve them. What ensued was people getting mad at me for 1) not taking them in and 2) not returning them to their home. So, honestly, as absolutely compelled morally as I felt to act in trying to get those pups home I really regretted trying to help. Posting that the dogs were out and where they were last seen and at what time was the limit of my ability to help. But it did not go well for me. 

[Terabith]

Helping is normal, and I think not helping is also normal, but being angry about someone else helping, when dog isn’t in the house, is not normal, unless they’re worried about something specific.  (Kennel cough is rampant and they’re worried about possibly getting own dog sick, for instance.)

[Halftime Hope]

@busymama7  We've been really grateful when neighbors have been kind enough to pick up a dog that got out (three times in 15+ years) and then have given us a call using the number on his collar tag.  Accidental pooch escapes can happen even when family members do use care. 

That said, it really sounds to me like this is a "last straw" situation, where is might not really be about the dog.  ??  If that's so, it might be good to let that situation pass and then when there is more equilibrium, see if you can find out what's at the bottom of it.  Either that, or it is about the dog, but there's clearly something that isn't in the clear yet. Sigh, more hard work to be done. Very best wishes!

 

 

[Corraleno]

1 hour ago, BusyMom5 said:

Will this dog not find his way home if you just leave him alone? 

When my dog got out, he went the opposite direction of the way we normally walk — he crossed a busy street and got into a neighborhood he's never been in before and then he must have panicked and just kept running. DD and I spent hours looking for him, but he was much farther away than we thought, and in the opposite direction. A nice older couple managed to get him in their backyard and called the number on his collar. He's a tiny little guy (8 lbs) and I don't think he would have ever been able to find his way home from where he was — much more likely that he would have been hit by a car, killed by another animal, or just starved to death. I'm incredibly grateful for the compassion and kindness of the couple who rescued him.

[KSera]

1 hour ago, BusyMom5 said:

 

Will this dog not find his way home if you just leave him alone?  We live in the country, and if a dog finds its way to our house we tell the kids to ignore it so it will move on.

 

I think this is often pretty different in rural vs suburban areas. Dogs typically aren’t used to wandering alone in suburban areas (it’s usually not allowed) and can tend to panic and go who knows which way. It’s pretty rare that I see a lost dog story on Nextdoor that ends with the dog returning by itself. Country dogs who are accustomed to wandering are a different matter. 

[Xahm]

I have an old friend,a wonderful woman with an adorable toddler, in the hospital right now as she was suddenly attacked by a dog and had to have her lower leg amputated. That's going to color how I feel about loose dogs for a really long time. I'd catch a dog I know and hold it for the owners, but that's about it. My husband's feelings are more strongly anti-dog than mine. Both of us have lived in environments with dangerous packs of feral dogs. I'm glad he and I are in basic agreement on this as it would be hard if one of us thought it immoral to not help while the other found it irresponsibly dangerous to help. 

[Kassia]

@XahmI'm so sorry about your friend.

[SKL]

I think it's normal to want to protect the dog temporarily (though some equally normal people would not have made the same choice).  I think it's a bit odd for DH to be that angry about it, knowing you are only planning to keep the dog overnight at most.

Some of us do have difficulty accepting surprises, particularly when we're tired or on our last nerve.  I could actually see myself getting pissy about it, but I'd get over myself.  I think it can be a sign of challenges such as mild autism.  Or some people act like this when they're upset about something much bigger - it's safer to bitch about stupid little things than to bring up a really difficult topic.

[Amy in NH]

6 hours ago, Amethyst said:

Fortunately, I have not been in the position of seeing stray dogs around much. If there was a dog wandering in my neighborhood, I would assume he belonged to someone in the neighborhood and would eventually find his way home. If I was driving down a country road, on my way to wherever, again I would assume it got loose and would eventually find its way home. If I took it in my car, further away from its home, that would make it harder for owner to find him. If it looked injured, I would be concerned, but not every loose dog is lost. Also, I don’t like approaching strange dogs, even ones on leashes. 
 

A young child by themself…completely and totally different story!! I don’t regard dogs with the same level of concern as I would a child. I don’t think it’s immoral to not stop everything you’re doing to respond to a lost or wandering dog. 

This may be true, however there is a Lost Dog recovery group in NH, and many times pets do become lost in my rural area and sometimes take months to be recovered.  One friend lost her dog permanently when he ran off into the woods - they never found him.  So picking up a friendly dog and taking them to the shelter or a vet is a good way to help them get home if there's no contact info on their tag or you don't see them posted "missing" on the local FB pages.  We don't have animal enforcement in my town, or many of the surrounding towns.  We don't even have a full time police department!

Edited March 5, 2023 by Amy in NH

[ktgrok]

It may be normal for some people, but I wouldn't want to marry a person who got angry about helping a dog. It would be a major difference in values. 

[Momof4sweetkids]

My normally very sweet dog has seizures and becomes aggressive afterwards so I wouldn't bring a dog home, not knowing if it has aggressive behaviors under different circumstances, but I'd call animal control and let neighbors know.