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About BusyMom5

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    Hive Mind Queen Bee

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  1. Maybe I can offer a different perspective. I grew up in a faith similar to yours in its rigidity. I followed the rules, got married before we lived together, no alcohol, ect. My husband was from a not as rigid group (Southern Baptist). Still Christian, but not the strict kind I was raised in. Fast forward a few years and I have grown, studied my way out of that faith and I had to try to explain to my parents. They disowned me. It was awful, and from my point of view it felt like they did not love me unconditionally. If I left their faith, I was out of the family, too. I could have understood if I had done something truly terrible like murder, becoming a drug addict or putting their grandkids in an abusive situation. That wasnt ever the case. I was still a good person. I just didnt live up to what they expected. The good news is that we did find s way to connect. Now I'm pretty close to them, and I do understand that they were hurt, but so was I. I think you should choose to look past whatever sin is going on with your son. Hes still your son and he needs your love, unconditionally. IMO not showing him unconditional love is anti- Christian. You are choosing to make this s line in the sand, hes trying to discover who he is. Its not your job to judge him. Trust me when I say he knows exactly how you feel! I think part of my parents problem was that they could not see me as an adult, I was an extension of them, even after I was married and on my own for years! Yes, he is allowed to have a different faith than you. Hes allowed to make different choices than you. Your job is to be his mother. Be there when he falls, support him when he needs it. Don't make this about you.
  2. Is there a writing lab? If so, I'd have her take her writing there first. There might be feedback on the paper after its graded.
  3. RSO Chemistry is a good intro. I used it last year and it was pretty good IMO. My oldest was doing high school chem (Zumdahl), but she often ended up listening in to our lessons, too. It does not sound like you've had a good chemistry year yet, so that's why I suggest this.
  4. USPS has a new system- every call gets logged so that theh can see problems like this. You will call and it goes to a call center and gets logged under your name, address, email, phone #. Then the c as all center let's the local PO know. I would start calling every time a package is marked delivered, but not. And how do I know this? DH called a few weeks ago bc our local mail from one store has been lost 3x in 6 months. He made a complaint and it's now logged and each time it happens it will be tracked.
  5. Mine is doing 2 on campus and 2 online classes. So far I think its going well! She is having to put a lot more time in than she expected in some classes, others are very easy. Its about what I expected.
  6. Fairy lights! One of my Dds has an entire wall curtain of them behind her daybed. Also string wire criss-crossed to hang whatever shes interested in at the moment- pics, posters, even small stuffed animals. I'd focus on whatever she wants over the bed and make that a focal point.
  7. Hugs. My grandparents are still alive and are beginning a decline. It's so frustrating for my family- me, my brother and my parents are local. We see what is going on. We try, but if your parents are resistant, there isn't a lot you can do. We've tried offering help and they always refuse, even though we know they need more help (groceries, cleaning, meds, Dr visits, driving around, ect). Until your parents are ready to make decisions, you just have to wait them out. I know family who live further away can't see the day to day struggle, and I think the people making comments may be trying to make you see that when you are there your parents appear to do better. My grandparents do this, and it drives me crazy bc then the uncle or whomever think we are exaggerating how much help they need. It's like they get a sort of high when family visit, then they crash for a month afterwards. You could start looking into assisted living and retirement communities even if they aren't ready. This helps you see your options. They can stay where they are or move closer to you. Be sure to get your name on Dr HIPPA forms so you can call and confirm or clarify medical questions. Without that, you are blind. Hugs, its okay to limit what you can do. It's a time for grace- for you, for your parents and for those who are trying to tell you how things really are.
  8. My DDs CC classes are all around 30-ish students. Where I live that's our best option. We do drive an hour to get there (UGH!).
  9. For boots maybe dressy combat boots? The not chunky ones. My DD has some that look cute with nicer clothes. Otherwise just flats.
  10. Candies brand in the Jrs dept at Lohls has some cute blazers that my teens like. If you are not a dresses only family, I'd suggest looking for separates rather than dresses. Pants in black and charcoal, and then tops and blazers from Kohls or similar.
  11. My cleaning time is from 3-5 ish. I don't clean that entire time, but that is my break time of no school and no dinner prep, so I decide what to clean or do. The kids usually play, but we do have a 30 minute cleaning time a few times per week (everyone cleans until I say we are done). On Fridays I like to get the entire house vacuumed and cleaned, school all picked up, ready for the weekend. My kids all help. For your 18 year old- she should be doing all her own laundry (my 14 and 16 year old do, and have since about 12). She should also be helping clean through the week. My day looks kinda like this - up, breakfast, maybe toss in a load of laundry, get baby ready for the day, and school starts by 830. Trying for 8 on days I'm extra busy. That 830 is a hard start time- whatever is left gets left and school must start. (Note kids get up and do animal chores before breakfast and school). They are required to be dressed and fed by 830. 830- 12 is school. I have 3 grades going on, plus a baby and a college kid who sometimes needs me to proofread. I do not stop this entire time. I do not answer the phone, do laundry or anything else. Lunch varies from 1130- 1230 depending on how school goes. I can switch laundry if needed. 100, baby naptime, olders independent school work. Everyone quiet! 300, snack, play time for kids, I do any project, clean or school plan until 5. 5- 6 dinner prep. Dinner is done by 630ish. Big girls clean up, i give littles a bath. Kids tend to watch a show around this time. 830, younger kids in bed, I nurse baby, big kids can stay up a bit later. 900- hopefully all littles are asleep, I get to spend about 2 hours reading or watching tv with hubby. Sometimes this is reading school books and planning.
  12. Try to uncomplicate the schedule as much as possible- have set Home days and set days you go out. I color coordinate a printed calendar with outings, apts, ect on it. A different color for each kid. School is scheduled in a different place, weekly, after looking at the upcoming appointments. Some weeks are just 3 days of school, some weeks we have 2 half- days, ect. Depending on the outing calendar. I keep a running grocery list, so as soon as I know I need something it goes on the list. In your example of needing gloves, they would be put on the list as soon as I knew I needed them and sent to school asap. I have tried a digital calendar, but I like seeing it all written out. I do not like too much on one thing either, which is why I keep it all separate- list, school, outings. If I did meal planning, it would be it's own calendar, and I would coordinate it with my outings calendar.
  13. I have 6, and I don't know anyone else with this many biological kids. We know one family with 13, most of them adopted. I know one with 5 and a handful with 4. Most people have 2 or 3.
  14. Hugs- we are near the end, too. It's sad, but also a welcome change.
  15. I would do US history again, some colleges wont accept classes done in 8th grade. You can focus on more modern era, my DD did US history in 10th, and we did s brief intro, jumped to the civil war and spent most of our time in modern era. Possible other credits- philosophy, world religions, geography, economics, story of science....
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