MercyA Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Totally open-ended question. What says "love in action" to you? ❤️ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted July 12, 2022 Author Share Posted July 12, 2022 We all know the answer is not always "someone doing the dishes for me...." 😉 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Going by the 5 Love Languages, I'm a quality time/conversation person. You can wash my dishes if you want. 😀 It's cool, either way. I appreciate, but do not expect it. I don't need compliments, but can accept them graciously if someone feels the need to give one. If you're gonna touch me, it better be to give me a neck/shoulder massage or to play with my hair. If it's just to touch me, back off! 😂 And please, please, please, do NOT give me a gift. But, if you call me for a phone chat, sit down and have a conversation with me, work alongside me at a project, play a card or board game with me, with a neutral to positive demeanor, that fills me up. If it's just to use me as a dumping ground for all your complaints and negativity, then that is not quality time and I refer you back to touching me or giving me a gift. 😉 6 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Save me from the paperwork and I'll love you forever! Or at least feel positively towards you for a significant amount of time. (I don't actually love whoever programs online forms to fill themselves in correctly, but I do feel positively towards them.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Respect me as a person. Ask if you can wash the dishes and respect my answer. 😉 (Actually as someone who is clawing my way from functional disability to actually being functional, sometimes it’s more helpful for me to do things myself.). Don’t assume things. Talk to me. Don’t railroad me. Or try to coddle me. Be kind to me. Laugh at my jokes. 6 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ananda Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 I am also a quality time/conversation. Also acceptance, if I can feel comfortable to be myself. I don't do well with touch or gifts. Acts of service have to actually serve, if they actually make my life easier then I really appreciate them. I also really like people to explicitly tell me what they want or need. My husband and I found out early on that we didn't want to do gift giving. I am so glad that we just discussed that while dating and didn't have the stress years of gift giving would have brought us both. He told me exactly what he wanted and needed, and I never had to doubt if he felt my love. That has been such a blessing now that he is dead. 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 (edited) Call the mechanic to make the car service appointments. Contribute to dinner ideas. Get the coffee going NOW. If I am reading, let me read. Let me invite you to go for a walk with me, don't assume I want company. Don't do dishes when the gutters need cleaning. 'Cause I can wash dishes, but I can't get on the ladder to clean gutters. (ETA: if it's 10:00 at night, still don't do the dishes, go to bed/save your strength to get up tomorrow and clean the gutters.) Edited July 12, 2022 by marbel 4 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarita Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 I am a snuggler. Just leave the house a mess and snuggle me. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 I am definitely an "acts of service" person and DH loves doing things for me so it works out well in that direction. He needs touch and I'm not good with that so I have to really work at it. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartlikealion Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Acts of service and quality time are high on my list. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AbcdeDooDah Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Equality in consideration and contributions to the relationship. 5 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 If we’re talking about the original five, quality time. I’ve mentioned information sharing here before. I think being able to chat about whatever weird kooky idea or interest I have going on and have someone engage with that and listen and respond with their own ideas is big for me. It kind of falls under quality time, but it’s definitely a subsection. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 I also think the love languages can be a bit fluid. When my kids were little words of affirmation came up high for me. But it doesn’t so much anymore. I think that’s because it’s a stage of life where you get very little praise for anything and any little mistake can turn into a mum-judging moment. Now I can see and judge the job I’m doing myself but when the kids were little it just felt like never-ending inadequacy. 8 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elizabeth86 Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 I grew up seeing my parents love each other and us children by the acts of service one, so naturally that's love to me. Dh is BAD at that. Honestly, though nothing makes me feel more loved than him doing work around the house rather than a full weekend of Minecraft. That being said. Dh likes the affirmation category and I suck at those. I'm not good at praising him. Some people like my kids yes, but people that are arrogant I do not like to praise them so much, but I sure try. Also the touch thing. I do like to cuddle, but a cuddle always makes DH in the mood for *ahem* and I have a pretty low drive and just don't need or want that often. So, if you want to show me love, build me an out building, do the weedeating, paint things, repair things, make things nice and better. 🤣 I don't like help with my chores though like dishes or laundry, but nothing would make me feel more cared for than DH working all day on house projects. My dad is a workaholic and perfectionist (in a healthy way) and still in his mid 70’s he works so hard around the house. Dh’s family didn't really do much of that (they worked hard on their farm though) My dad is all the time trying to improve their house and car and I'd like to be the same, but I just need dh’s help and he'd rather not. 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HomeAgain Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Acts, I think. Ways I know dh loves me: He sets up the coffee pot every night so all I have to do is press 'start' in the morning. He folds the laundry, not because he loves doing it, but he knows I hate it. He goes out of his way to make sure a gift fits into my sensory issues (ordering custom watch bands, running his hand inside new clothes, etc) He encourages me, even if he doesn't understand exactly what my goal is. Same goes for just listening. He always attempts to shift my burden to him. My love for him doesn't look a whole lot different. But he has touch high up on his list, so I try to do casual touches as much as I can and make time in the evening to just be together on the couch a few nights a week. My sensory issues keep me from enjoying it as much as he does but it makes him so happy and cared for. 6 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Acts of service. If you are going to give me a gift something that provides acts of service is deeply appreciated. For instance, one of dds got me an ice maker for Christmas last year. I think it is one of my favorite gifts ever. Anyhow, all of my family is really good at providing acts of service to me. I don't know if I trained them that way (that is also how I show love) or if they just picked up that that is what I like. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Looking me in the eye and smiling. Makes me swoon every time 4 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 2 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said: So, if you want to show me love, build me an out building, do the weedeating, paint things, repair things, make things nice and better. 🤣 I don't like help with my chores though like dishes or laundry, but nothing would make me feel more cared for than DH working all day on house projects. My dad is a workaholic and perfectionist (in a healthy way) and still in his mid 70’s he works so hard around the house. Dh’s family didn't really do much of that (they worked hard on their farm though) My dad is all the time trying to improve their house and car and I'd like to be the same, but I just need dh’s help and he'd rather not. I so agree with this. "Acts of service" I guess would be mine, but not in the typical "help with the dishes, vacuuming and laundry" sort of way I see most women talking about. Clean your crap out of the garage, build or buy and install a shed, fix things up to make the house look nicer. For the most part, "acts of service" doesn't do much for me because so often the act of service being performed is one that the giver wants to give, not what I want to receive. 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Tiggywinkle Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Time. Someone wanting to spend time with me is the way I know they love me. So of course DH’s primary love language is acts of service and the way he shows love is by working seven days a week and being a good provider. I am convinced that people with opposite love languages attract. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Acts of service. Dh is a master at it. I had to laugh at the comment above ….’ Let me do the dishes and you go clean the gutters’. Dh is likely to do my work as well as his which makes me feel annoyed at times…but at least I have figured out he is not judging me or shaming me he just wants to be of use all of the time. Dh is a physical touch person. I am as well, so we are well matched in that area. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 6 minutes ago, marbel said: I so agree with this. "Acts of service" I guess would be mine, but not in the typical "help with the dishes, vacuuming and laundry" sort of way I see most women talking about. Clean your crap out of the garage, build or buy and install a shed, fix things up to make the house look nicer. For the most part, "acts of service" doesn't do much for me because so often the act of service being performed is one that the giver wants to give, not what I want to receive. That is a good point. I have had to relay this to Dh over the years. Mainly I have asked him to finish one project before he begins another. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Be present in that moment and respond thoughtfully to that situation. None of this formulaic “She likes praise so I’ll always do this one thing.” The whole love languages thing rubs me the wrong way. I’m super low-maintenance, but all five of those things have a place in different situations. 7 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Just now, KungFuPanda said: Be present in that moment and respond thoughtfully to that situation. None of this formulaic “She likes praise so I’ll always do this one thing.” The whole love languages thing rubs me the wrong way. I’m super low-maintenance, but all five of those things have a place in different situations. Agree. It isn’t really as simple as it is sometimes made out. Dh has a bad back…..sometimes he will begin to rub my back in the area that his hurts…..and it is a spot that doesn’t feel good to me. I will say, ‘is your back hurting?’ Then he will realize what he is doing and stop. Then I rub his back. It is really interesting to watch. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScoutTN Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Mine are touch and time. But Dh communicates in acts of service. Agreeing that we all use all of them to some degree and different situations call for different responses. Dh is a good man, just not attuned to these kinds of subtleties. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Being noticed, being remembered (Not just with dh) 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 From the 5 Love Languages, I'm a quality time, gifts, touch, words of affirmation person. I don't recall which is stronger, just that acts of service is lowest/last. In my day-to-day life, things that my husband does that make me feel loved include (but are not limited to): ....setting up the coffee to be started when I get up, if he's going to be gone (he normally fixes the coffee in the morning; if he's going to be gone, he'll get it all ready and put a "just push start" note on it for me) ...small surprise treats (ex: this cheese that's very similar to a cheese we could only get in Brazil, that he recently found here, that I adore) ...any time he randomly comes up to me and gives me a little kiss, or anything like that, for no reason/with no ulterior motives From other people, touch is not really part of the equation, but a nice text or email or note definitely makes my heart sing. Or just hanging out visiting. Going back to the guest thread, I'd definitely be firmly in the camp of "no, sit and visit, I'll deal with the dishes later" (although I'm learning that for some people, how they *show* love is by doing acts of service, so if they insist, I'll work side by side, or sit at the bar and let them wash dishes; my kitchen bar is at my sink, so when one is working and one sitting, it's perfect for conversation). Little surprise gifts are always fun, which sounds more materialistic than I really am.....my favorite end-of-year gift from my students this year was that one of the moms gathered the class and took a class photo, matted & framed it, and the kids all signed the mat around the picture. Oh my gosh, I cried. Stuff like that. From my kids, for mother's day - one made me a drawing that said "we will be in all the pictures" -- so it was this great drawing of the 3 of them, and me taking a photo, but also the promise to be in the photos on our family vacation. Another one did a wood-burning plaque for me with a bible verse about training up kids. (the 3rd one still owes me a portrait leftover from Christmas, but whatever....that kid shows his love with snark, sarcasm, and playful banter.....). I'm learning to feel love when offered in different ways, though; DH is an acts of service guy, as is one of my kiddos. Another has never verbalized it to me, ever, but has shown it all his life in different ways. So, once I get to know a person well, then I feel loved whenever they show it in their way, whatever way that is. But it's taken being married/mom to folks who all show it differently than my preferred way to learn how to receive it in other ways. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 (edited) Nm Edited July 12, 2022 by TechWife Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 3 hours ago, KungFuPanda said: Be present in that moment and respond thoughtfully to that situation. None of this formulaic “She likes praise so I’ll always do this one thing.” The whole love languages thing rubs me the wrong way. I’m super low-maintenance, but all five of those things have a place in different situations. Yea. I was coming here to say that. The people who genuinely love me, respect and “see” me. So a genuine compliment is appreciated. Gushing flattery turns me off. Genuine acts of service that are truly what I want are helpful. Bulldozing me by taking over isn’t. (This is why asking about what is helpful is so important to me.). Genuinely listening to me and being with me is great but “read the room” - if I am in a hurry to meet a deadline or just need to be alone for a bit, then it can be suffocating instead. Genuine touch is great but if I am in a lot of pain or am in the middle of meeting the aforementioned deadline then it’s not the time or place. Genuine gifts are appreciated. But gifts out of obligation aren’t. 6 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 3 hours ago, KungFuPanda said: Be present in that moment and respond thoughtfully to that situation. None of this formulaic “She likes praise so I’ll always do this one thing.” The whole love languages thing rubs me the wrong way. I’m super low-maintenance, but all five of those things have a place in different situations. Spot on! They are all relevant to me, in some way, shape, or form. Even receiving gifts... but only gifts that come from the heart. Not into the "it's obvious they grabbed the first thing on the shelf and forgot who I am." Then, I'd really rather get nothing instead of something that didn't mean anything to the giver or receiver. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rebcoola Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Touch is number 1 on my list. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 While I think it can be useful in some ways, the 5 love languages approach hasn't really resonated with me. I like to be thought of--give me a call or text during the day, bring me a little gift (a coffee or some other small thing), save a thought or idea you want to share with me, etc. I like to be respected--pick my brain to see what I think about something that you are working on in your brain, listen when I share about what I am reading or thinking. I like gifts, but not just any old thing, because I am trying to be very careful about filling our house with extra stuff. But gift cards are absolutely awesome: to the local coffee shop or to fast food restaurants for when I want a little personal treat, to Amazon because I love books and always have way more on my wishlist than I can buy, to a clothing store because I prefer to pick out my own clothes. My family laughs at me a little because I hoard my gift cards to use throughout the year, because I want to make sure I spend them the way I really want to (I just spent my Christmas Amazon cards last week). We are on a limited budget, so I am very thoughtful about how I spend them. I like to be cared for--not in a condescending/patronizing way, but dh is really good about handling "things that must be done" like car maintenance, house maintenance, yard maintenance--stuff that I like having done but don't like to do myself. While a sincere simple compliment is fine, I am very uncomfortable with much praise. "I really like your new top" is sufficient. Or "you did a good job on that". But I feel awkward and tend to dismiss anything close to gushing or flattery. I like touch sometimes--love to have my head rubbed or a touch on the shoulder. I don't like a pat on the butt, and I hate to be tickled. Intimacy is good, but be in tune with my mood, and I will try not to be selfish with my moods. 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyoffive Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Since becoming a mom Acts of Service is first on my list. I can't remember if I would have felt the same before having kids. I like time too, but only when I am in the mood for it because I like alone time too. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 2 hours ago, Jaybee said: But gift cards are absolutely awesome: to the local coffee shop or to fast food restaurants for when I want a little personal treat, to Amazon because I love books and always have way more on my wishlist than I can buy, to a clothing store because I prefer to pick out my own clothes. My family laughs at me a little because I hoard my gift cards to use throughout the year, because I want to make sure I spend them the way I really want to (I just spent my Christmas Amazon cards last week). We are on a limited budget, so I am very thoughtful about how I spend them. I like to be cared for--not in a condescending/patronizing way, but dh is really good about handling "things that must be done" like car maintenance, house maintenance, yard maintenance--stuff that I like having done but don't like to do myself. Lol. This is why life is hard. 😂 DH and I were just discussing how much we hate gift cards today. I remarked that if someone wants to give money, then I'd rather just have cash to spend how I want/need. Gift cards are "work" to me. Keeping track of them, keeping track of the balance on them, and having to shop at particular stores or websites, or eat at particular restaurants. It doesn't feel like a gift at all. 3 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TexasProud Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 (edited) Honestly, my love language is whatever is missing. And I wonder if that goes for anyone else as well. But I really miss physical touch. Edited July 13, 2022 by TexasProud 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HS Mom in NC Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 -quality time together doing a shared interest, discussing a topic of shared interest, working on a shared passion project, brainstorming a project together -being physically near doing mundane tasks (usually in comfortable silence or collaborative brainstorming/troubleshooting) -not adding unnecessary work/frustrations to my life -considering/asking my preferences (because I consider/ask about other family members' preferences all.the.time) -only doing acts of service I specified I want done and doing in a way that's actually helpful -asking and never assuming (people rarely get it right when they make assumptions about me) -being treated like a peer with respect Things others like that I don't: Most non-consumable gifts that I didn't specify I wanted (I'm a minimalist) with the exception of highly sentimentalized/personalized gifts like my brother gives me: pen he carved out of a dead tree from our favorite campground, our grandmother's (who helped raise us) holiday jello salad recipe he had printed on a sea glass colored plaque, and a Scandinavian dragon's head he custom made for my kayak because we did that together for years. A close friend gave me a a lovely gift of a gargoyle figurine to "keep away my demons" in classical architecture style in reference to some confidant type conversations we've had. But if it doesn't rise to that level of sentimental and personalized, I'll probably just donate it, so save your money and energy. And no, if it's not a Lowe's Home Improvement or Amazon gift card, it's probably of almost no use to me, so it's work to use it or get rid of it. It's not a gift, it's an errand. Touching if you're not my spouse or kid is not something I want people to do. I can give and tolerate a quick hug for the sake of a relationship and convention, but it's not a way I want others to shoe me love. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 COLD, HARD CASH. 😉 3 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Indigo Blue Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 14 minutes ago, HS Mom in NC said: holiday jello salad recipe he had printed on a sea glass colored plaque, That’s really nice. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Someone who can truly listen non-judgmentally. Especially when I’m broken or ugly or just can’t put a nice spin on it. The opposite is also the best way to lose my trust. 6 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcadia Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 27 minutes ago, Catwoman said: COLD, HARD CASH. 😉 My parents and relatives does that. To them its like the traditional version of GoFundMe. I do find cash easier especially with no strings attached. My parents would give me cash for my kids and its up to me to spend. OP, With regards to my husband, it would be decluttering. We have lots of “ancient ewaste” because they are still in working condition though they are already obsolete e.g 2nd generation iPads and kindles. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HS Mom in NC Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 24 minutes ago, Indigo Blue said: That’s really nice. He asked for the original recipe card, framed it, and put it on his wall when Grandparents went into care about 12 year ago. Grandmother had the recipe memorized and squirreled it away in one of her recipe boxes-it took us over an hour to flip through them and find it. She always adoringly mentioned I doodled on the card with a pen when I was a toddler. No one loves toddler doodles like a grandmother. So when he had it printed onto the sea glass as a housewarming gift after I moved across the country 4 years ago, the doodles, scotch tape that had yellowed, and liquid spots it had accumulated over the years were visible on the plaque. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
73349 Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Quality time together and thoughtful acts (and it helps if you've communicated with me about what might be a thoughtful act--don't spend 4 minutes unloading my dishwasher if you're creating a hassle for me elsewhere). I just want to hang out and talk. Y'all can come do yard work for me any time, too. I hate praise, generally cringe quietly at gifts I didn't pick out (all the more so if it would be hard to re-gift), and typically don't want a lot of physical contact. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaybee Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 4 hours ago, fraidycat said: Lol. This is why life is hard. 😂 DH and I were just discussing how much we hate gift cards today. I remarked that if someone wants to give money, then I'd rather just have cash to spend how I want/need. Gift cards are "work" to me. Keeping track of them, keeping track of the balance on them, and having to shop at particular stores or websites, or eat at particular restaurants. It doesn't feel like a gift at all. The people who give them to me know my favorite spots!🤣 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa Louise Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 I highly value practical help + giving me space for some solitude. Hugs sometimes but not always. My idea of love is someone taking chores off my plate, making me a cup of tea, and then letting me go off to read/write for a long time. That's what makes me feel good. I wouldn't say I'm an easy person to show love to, because to.me it involves an acceptance of my need for solitude. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted July 12, 2022 Share Posted July 12, 2022 Probably quality time? Being listened to respectfully, being accepted/appreciated. (But not too much quality time ... I need to be alone too!) I also appreciate it if I'm near the end of my rope and someone realizes that and helps me without expecting anything in return. But normally I don't want "help," I prefer the feeling of accomplishing something on my own. Just don't pick at the way I did it or how long it took. 😛 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted July 13, 2022 Share Posted July 13, 2022 I may delete this later because I’m a bit of a chicken. People have mentioned touch. But there’s something missing from that & it was the first thing that came to my mind when I read this question earlier today. I was going to say this earlier, but chickened out. S3x people. S3x. Making wh00pie. Making love. Int3rcourse. Whatever you want to call it,. S3x. 4 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted July 13, 2022 Share Posted July 13, 2022 @TechWifeyour DH is a lucky guy. 🙂 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grace Hopper Posted July 13, 2022 Share Posted July 13, 2022 Leave me alone and regularly slide some high quality meals and library books under the door. Sigh, that is how I feel this week. Good conversation is actually my love language. Conversation about interesting topics, not just a one-sides download, iykwim. 8 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grace Hopper Posted July 13, 2022 Share Posted July 13, 2022 (edited) 31 minutes ago, TechWife said: I may delete this later… <snip> I hear you but can I say, what I really value is non-sexual touch? Because the physical is available all the time. I feel most loved - and respected - when there can be physical touch without a goal in mind other than just being in proximity to one another. Edited July 13, 2022 by Grace Hopper 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted July 13, 2022 Author Share Posted July 13, 2022 (edited) . Edited July 13, 2022 by MercyA 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted July 13, 2022 Share Posted July 13, 2022 20 hours ago, MercyA said: Totally open-ended question. What says "love in action" to you? ❤️ Close to me? Touch. I'm a hugger, sit on my lap, cuddle, hold my hand human. Not super close to me? Don't touch but if you bring me cooked food I see it as a huge act of service. In "love languages" I am physical touch and acts of service. Words of affirmation are nice and it's a language I speak heavily but don't overdo it and gifts make me incredibly uncomfortable. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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