How many gifts do your kids get at Christmas?

[alysee]

I am just curious. How many presents do your kids get from you and any extended family? 

For us each kid gets 3 presents from us, and we do a secret santa gift between the kids. My extended family gives them another 6 presents, usually it's clothing, crafts or books. 

 

[Corraleno]

When they were little they would generally get 8-10 presents, and all of those were from me as they never got presents from other family members (we lived far away and were not close to family). Some of those would be practical like clothes or sports equipment that they probably would have gotten anyway, but since it was close to Christmas I'd just add them to the pile under the tree. Now that they're adults, they generally just get clothes plus a few little fun things.

[kbutton]

We aim for three or so important items with some smaller stuff in a stocking or on the side—it depends on sales and our creativity in what to get. We try to make the important items things they’ve said they really want and then go off script on the small items; they are often practical either for life of hobbies. For example, one DS hated putting things in the oven or getting them out. I was the same at his age. Aldi had robust but inexpensive lined silicone oven mitts, so we bought one for each hand. He loved it and is now very confident using the oven! And they are non-slip on top of being insulating from the heat.

ETA: Oh, they usually get several grandparent gifts. On one side, they get gifts from uncle/aunt. On the other side, they are in the larger pool for the adult’s gift exchange.

Edited November 1, 2023 by kbutton

[Clarita]

Zero from us. They are the only grandchildren on both sides of the family so way too much from the grandparents. 

[mommyoffive]

Never counted.  Christmas has always been really really  big.  They are the only grandkids on my side so they got showered with presents from everyone on that side.  Over the years we have gotten them to give them less, but it is still a ton.  

We give them a lot too.  It is the only time of year we buy them toys.  My older 2 or 3 are not in the toy stage anymore.  But still other than clothes they need we do not buy them things year round. I would love to just do a trip instead and no presents.  We have done a trip as their gift but they still got presents. 

[Indigo Blue]

Empty nesters….with two grown sons

It’s probably around $100.00 or so each. 

[rebcoola]

It varies depending on how big the presents are. This year no one really has any big needs or wants. Nothing over 50$ so probably a few more. Ive bought 4 things for littlest and might by 1 more. Oldest just had their birthday and middle's is  this month so waiting to see what they get before finalizing.

 

[Harriet Vane]

A million years ago on this board somebody mentioned this rhyme, and we've done it every since:

 

Something you want

Something you need

Something to wear

Something to read

 

We also give the kids an ornament and we get a family game or puzzle to do together. 

[Brittany1116]

From extended family? Too dang many. MIL overbuys and we have a lot of siblings. 

From us, it has varied annually. Last year I wrapped anything I bought from June 1 on, and they had a lot of stuff to open. 

This year is want ($ Lego), need (varied by kid), wear (varied), read. Plus some collector coins and minifigs in the stockings. 

 

[JustEm]

We don't really count. We do a lot of family gifts and then each kids get 3 or 4 individual gifts. But then they get tons from mil, fil and his husband, aunts and uncles.

[Momto6inIN]

We get the kids each 1 gift from us under the tree and 1 in their stocking (usually a book but not always). The kids all exchange names with each other so they also get 1 gift from one of their siblings.

DH's side of the family is huge so the cousins all exchange names also and they get 1 gift from one of their cousins. DH's parents usually give a small day outing of some kind to the whole family.

My parents historically overdo it and I've been trying to rein it in from the get-go when 1st DS actually stopped opening gifts and wandered off to play because he was bored from opening so many presents from them at his first Christmas. Since then my mom has morphed more into getting big expensive gifts and/or larger extended trips together. It's not as many in quantity but it's still too much imo.

If my mom didn't overdo it so much it's possible we would give more gifts to the kids than we do.

[Catwoman]

We go all-out for any and all gift-giving holidays, so Christmas has always been a minimum of 100 gifts for ds (well, ok, not when he was really little!,) and we spend tens of thousands of dollars between dh, ds, and me (and sometimes considerably more than that if someone got something really big, like a new car.) I shop all year for holidays, too, so it's not like I'm buying everything all at once.

I love holidays and I love giving gifts! 🥰

#ExcessiveButLovingIt

Edited November 1, 2023 by Catwoman
typo

[HomeAgain]

Eh, not many.  We have some traditional gifts (socks, books, toothbrush), and a few we add in that we think are needed.  There are usually 1-2 wanted gifts as well.  This year ds13 is getting a new hockey bag because his is literally falling apart, a desk lamp to replace his old nightlight lamp, and maybe a game.  DS24 is getting a heavy uniform jacket for work, maybe a dice tower, and a vintage game for his old game boy.  We'll spend the day doing activities together and eating junk food/cookies.

We're at the point in our lives where none of us need or want much, and when we do want something it needs to have a home for it to go in before we purchase it.

[marbel]

We never counted gifts, just stayed within a general budget and tried to keep things even in terms of number when they were little.  They got a gift from my mother, which I chose and purchased. From my in-laws, they got two or three things - when they were little, games that were always too young for them. Later, clothing items that the kids never liked. Except the fleece! Every year, a new quarter-zip fleece. Now my MIL has died, there are no more fleeces forthcoming. 

I had my kids much later than my siblings and saw many Christmases where their kids were overwhelmed by vast numbers of gifts. I decided not to get that started even if we could afford it. 

Now that they are adults, I collect books that I think they will like throughout the year (new and used), and we get them gift cards or memberships. Maybe some clothing. 

[catz]

Varies.  If there bigger ticket items, lower numbers.  When kids were younger, I used it as an excuse to invest in extra educational stuff to wrap up like books, science kits, models, etc.  My kids probably get on aveerage a dozen things as teens/young adults to open plus a stocking with lots of goodies too.  

[SKL]

I don't really count, but for little kids, around 7 seems to be a sweet number.  Much more and they find it laborious to open them and don't really notice what they are.  Less and it's over too soon.

Once they are old enough to have particular interests, it depends on the price of the "main gift(s)."  If my kid asks for something that costs over $100, that is gonna be her only serious gift, though I would buy several small items so things don't appear too stark.

I actually prefer if both of my kids can come up with one or two substantial gift requests.  Then I'm not playing hit-or-miss in an effort to balance things.

Edited November 1, 2023 by SKL

[pinball]

19 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

We go all-out for any and all gift-giving holidays, so Christmas has always been a minimum of 100 gifts for ds (well, ok, not when he was really little!,) and we spend tens of thousands of dollars between dh, ds, and me (and sometimes considerably more than that if someone got something really big, like a new car.) I shop all year for holidays, too, so it's not like I'm buying everything all at once.

I love holidays and I love giving gifts! 🥰

#ExcessiveButLovingIt

So you’re one of the people who keeps the Giant Bow Makers in business?

[Catwoman]

1 minute ago, pinball said:

So you’re one of the people who keeps the Giant Bow Makers in business?

LOL!!!

We did get a giant bow once, but the coolest thing was when Jaguar delivered a car and put a gigantic stuffed Jaguar on the roof.

My ds was little at the time and he'd loved the big Jaguar on a car roof at the dealership, so it was very sweet of them to give us one. Ds couldn't have cared less about the car, but he LOVED that plushie (possibly more than I loved the car.)

[Katy]

A lot. It’s ridiculous. Every time I think we’re done we find something else. 

[Catwoman]

2 minutes ago, Katy said:

A lot. It’s ridiculous. Every time I think we’re done we find something else. 

Same here! But that's way better than when you think you're done and then someone adds a last-minute item to their list and you have to scramble like a lunatic to get it in time! 😅

Edited November 1, 2023 by Catwoman
I really can't type today

[Katy]

2 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

Same here! But that's way better than when you think you're done and then someone adds a last-minute item to their list and you have to scramble like a lunatic to get it in time! 😅

That’s true!

[Lynn in al]

It varied year to year depending what they wanted.  However, when my oldest boys, who are only 2.5 years apart I kept the number even until they were old enough to understand that one wanted xyz which cost $100 but the other wanted abc that cost $25 so we'd get him other things he wanted  to get closer to the dollar amount, when they were teens it was usually gift cards to their favorite fastfood place.  Now that they are adults we either send Omaha steak package or wm gift card if I can't think of anything.  Last year we gave married ds and wife an electric griddle along with some pancake mix, syrup and chocolate chips.  

Edited November 1, 2023 by Lynn in al

[Indigo Blue]

Well, I wish I could think of something to buy for a son that has everything. He has a Titanic Lego ship. It is HUGE. He builds watches, but those kits are out of my price range. I’m always stumped. 
 

He found some body wash once he really loved, so I had four bottles shipped to him for Christmas. Each a different scent. They burst in the box during delivery, and got all over the other items in the box. So, he had a mess to clean up and most of the body wash was spilled. Epic failure. 🤦‍♀️

[bookbard]

We have all the birthdays (except mine) within a month either side of Christmas, so it's a balance of managing stuff for both celebrations. They get a small stocking that I made myself, only fits in a couple of little things. Then a few other things, generally fits on the seat of a chair each. Books, t-shirts, games. I worry each year that they'll be disappointed, it's been so far so good. 

[prairiewindmomma]

We’re minimalists in this area. We’re actually doing stockings only this year, and experiences in lieu of things. 

[Elizabeth86]

We usually do 4 each and stockings at our house. They usually get 5 or so from various other people. Too much. 😂

[gardenmom5]

I don't do numbers - I do budget.

I would spend the same amount on each child, but some might have more because their gifts cost less.

 

Eventually, when they were all adults, things got thrown out the window..   I try to keep things balanced, but it's not even.
 

[Spryte]

Oof. I’ve never really counted. Many. Enough from us under the tree that it feels right.

Then we also have stockings and Santa still comes, so it ends up being more.

We have some extended family, but everyone is of the give one gift variety, and many don’t exchange gifts at all — and never on the Big Day — so it doesn’t add to the overwhelm.

Can I say how much I love doing stockings? Love, love, love stockings!

 

[Carrie12345]

It varies by year and how expensive their wishes are running!

[MercyA]

DD15 usually gets 3-5 larger gifts and about 5 stocking stuffers from us. My MIL gives her one gift. My parents give her around 3 gifts, depending on how expensive they are. (They always spend the same amount on all the grandkids.) Her bestie usually gives her a small or handmade gift. 

[Catwoman]

1 hour ago, Spryte said:

Oof. I’ve never really counted. Many. Enough from us under the tree that it feels right.

Then we also have stockings and Santa still comes, so it ends up being more.

We have some extended family, but everyone is of the give one gift variety, and many don’t exchange gifts at all — and never on the Big Day — so it doesn’t add to the overwhelm.

Can I say how much I love doing stockings? Love, love, love stockings!

 

I love doing stockings, too!  One year I ended up with so many stocking stuffers that I ended up buying ds a second stocking... so ever since then, he has 2 stockings... 

Christmas Eve is always an all-nighter for me, because I'm never done wrapping gifts until the last possible second, and then it takes me hours to arrange everything around the tree so everything is exactly where I want it, and so the gifts get opened in the order I want (so the really big stuff is spaced out among the smaller stuff and the very best gifts are at the end.)

Clearly I have issues. 😂

I only know how many gifts I give because I am a meticulous list-maker when it comes to holiday and birthday gifts. I am terribly organized about most other things, but because I shop all year, I really have to keep track of what I bought and where I hid everything. And despite that, I am STILL missing one gift from last Christmas. I swore I knew where I put it. I wrote down where I was going to put it. But then apparently I changed my mind and put it in a way better spot, certain that I'd remember where it was. Oops!

Edited November 1, 2023 by Catwoman
I can't even count the number of typos I have made today.

[Clarita]

3 hours ago, Catwoman said:

3 hours ago, pinball said:

So you’re one of the people who keeps the Giant Bow Makers in business?

LOL!!!

We did get a giant bow once, but the coolest thing was when Jaguar delivered a car and put a gigantic stuffed Jaguar on the roof.

My ds was little at the time and he'd loved the big Jaguar on a car roof at the dealership, so it was very sweet of them to give us one. Ds couldn't have cared less about the car, but he LOVED that plushie (possibly more than I loved the car.)

How do you get the giant bow? DH is due for a car, for sure it's going to be something we decide on, but I want the giant bow on it.

[historically accurate]

1 or 2 per kid from us + stockings, 3 from different sets of aunts and uncles (although one set stops purchasing after child turns 18), cash from one grandparent and anywhere from 1-4 per kid from the other grandparent depending on her mood/time/budget. That's it. 

[Drama Llama]

Too many.  Ridiculous amounts really.

I try to make it a little less ridiculous by giving things that I would give anyway.  So, for example, we're going skiing/snowboarding after Christmas and I told them the snowboard rental and lift tickets are my gifts to them.  My mom gives them music and math lessons for their Christmas present and summer camp tuition for their birthday. 

But they get gifts from many many family members.

Having said that, this is an easy year for my 13 year old athlete because I can just tell everyone he needs a different kind of shoe since his feet are growing so fast and he plays so many different sports.  Actually, he's the easy one, because you can just get him ingredients.  A couple years ago, his favorite gift was a bunch of different kinds of game meat so he cold make some pie he saw on Great British Bake Off.  

 

[Terabith]

I wanted to be a family that did lavish stuff, but then my actual kids were like, “No, I think I’ve got everything I want” at age four.  Or “what I really want is a real live baby dragon.”  
 

We scaled back significantly.  

[marbel]

14 minutes ago, Terabith said:

I wanted to be a family that did lavish stuff, but then my actual kids were like, “No, I think I’ve got everything I want” at age four.  Or “what I really want is a real live baby dragon.”  
 

We scaled back significantly.  

So, this happened to a relative which is part of why I never went crazy with my kids. She had bought a ton of stuff for her kids, but the oldest (about 4 I think?) wanted just one thing. And kept insisting on that one thing. So, that one thing was under the tree, unwrapped and the kid saw it first thing, and was thrilled, like absolutely thrilled to have this one thing, and just wanted to play with it. When the mom said, "don't you want to open your other things?" the kid was like "this was what I wanted" and didn't seem interested in opening more gifts at first. 

However, time went on, the other gifts were opened, and after that the kid clued in that Christmas meant boatloads of gifts. And then in subsequent years I started to see that no matter how many gifts there were, the kids (there were siblings aware of gifts by then) felt like there should be more, and felt let down when the gift-opening-frenzy was over. It just took a year from being happy with one highly-desired thing to being disappointed with a huge number of gifts. 

I didn't limit myself to one gift per kid, but we just never bought more than a few. I did make sure they were high-value for my kids though. Lots of Legos and Playmobil and books, plus art supplies for my art kid. Also, it turned out - I didn't know this at the time I made this decision - one of my kids is easily overwhelmed and can't handle a lot of stimulation all at once. So another good reason to keep it low key.

ETA: that was just my experience as an adult before I had my own kids; I am not implying that all kids are discontent and overwhelmed when there are lots of gifts. 

Edited November 2, 2023 by marbel

[Catwoman]

1 hour ago, Clarita said:

How do you get the giant bow? DH is due for a car, for sure it's going to be something we decide on, but I want the giant bow on it.

Just ask the dealership and they should be able to do it for you. 🙂  If you buy it around the holidays or say it’s a birthday gift, they might suggest it on their own.

[Heartstrings]

We usually do 5.  No reason, that's just the number that feels like not too much, not too little.  Usually, 1 or 2 things are more inexpensive like a blanket, a stuffy or pokemon cards. We probably would have scaled down years ago but we have big age gaps and I don't want the little one to miss out because her brothers are teens, but also don't want the teens to feel less than the little on if we get them fewer things.  So....5.   It is incredibly difficult because the older boys have 0 wants and very few needs, while the little one of course loves all sorts of things and wants everything. 

This year will probably be different with 1 college kid.  He just wants money as a broke college student.  I'll probably also get him some needs, like new jeans or sleep pants so that he opens something.    

[Catwoman]

17 minutes ago, Terabith said:

I wanted to be a family that did lavish stuff, but then my actual kids were like, “No, I think I’ve got everything I want” at age four.  Or “what I really want is a real live baby dragon.”  
 

We scaled back significantly.  

Don’t sell yourself short. 

I’ll bet that baby dragon wasn’t cheap, and he must have cost a fortune to feed, not to mention the dragon barn you had to build in the back yard. 😉 

 

[fraidycat]

It varies year to year. Some years they get one $$$ gift and one or two $ gifts. Other years, they might get 6 or 8 $$ and $ gifts.

This year I'm aiming for 3 or 4 gifts. I can't really think of much for my own two kids, but have a couple ideas for their SOs. Lol I do have one gift each that I bought for all 4 kids + DH. They are all getting silk pillow cases, because I love mine and what it has done for my hair + skin.

[MercyA]

@Catwoman, I need to hear about your gift wrapping. Do you do them yourself? Matching / coordinating paper for all of them? Gift bags? I'm imagining doing curly ribbon on so many gifts... LOL. Inquiring minds want to know. 🙂

[Murphy101]

Like kids kids? 3. Good enough for Jesus is good enough for my kids. 

Like grown kids ? 1 or 2.

I have no plans to get grandchildren more than 1 gift.

Rarely more than $100 each and the rare times are not a physical gift but usually something like memorable event type thing. 

[Catwoman]

41 minutes ago, MercyA said:

@Catwoman, I need to hear about your gift wrapping. Do you do them yourself? Matching / coordinating paper for all of them? Gift bags? I'm imagining doing curly ribbon on so many gifts... LOL. Inquiring minds want to know. 🙂

If a store offers gift wrapping, I am more than happy to let them wrap for me, and if I'm in a mall and there's a gift wrapping station, I'll pay to have my purchases wrapped, but otherwise I do it all myself. And since Covid, I have done all of it, because most of my shopping has been done online.

I buy a ton of gift wrap, and I try to have a lot of variety, rather than going for a totally coordinated look. I also use lots of cute gift bags and coordinating tissue paper, and I have some giant bags for really big boxes (I think the bags were originally intended as bike bags or something, and I have multiples in each pattern in case I have something gigantic to wrap.) I do re-use gift bags and the giant bags, because the gifts are for immediate family and there's no need to re-buy new bags every year. (Also, we have favorites we look forward to seeing every year.) 

I don't use things like curly ribbon on very many gifts, because it's just too time consuming. I use some fancy stick-on ribbons here and there and I have a few huge fabric ribbons, but because the gifts end up in big stacks, I don't end up using very many, because I put gift bags on top of the boxes. I do the boxes in layers by size so I can also put gift bags on larger boxes and then more gift bags on the next-size smaller layers of boxes, and on and on until I am down to the smallest boxes and teeny tiny gift bags. (This is probably not making sense.) I also have some sets of nesting gift boxes that I use every year and I love those because they are so easy to use and they look good under the tree with basically zero effort from me.

I'm pretty fast at wrapping gifts, but as I said, I only get fancy with some of them, and by around 3AM on Christmas morning, all bets are off and I am DONE with fancy and have moved into Desperation Mode. Every year, I say it will be different and I will be done early. And every year, I am wrong, and I don't finish up until it's already light outside on Christmas morning. But Christmas Eve and Christmas are my two favorite days of the year, so I actually enjoy all those hours of sitting by the fireplace and getting everything ready (while drinking a lot of fancy espresso drinks and eating my favorite snacks!)

[Tap]

Depending on my budget, $300-500 worth LOL. I don't go by count, but cost. 

[Drama Llama]

For those of you whose relatives give a ton of gifts, has anyone had any success getting it reduced?

Things have gotten really out of control here.  

Part of the issue is that I think all of the family is hesitant to treat one set of cousins differently from the other, and my SIL really wants her kids to get a ton of stuff.  

[Laura Corin]

It used to be about six, plus small things (socks, a paperback, an orange, chocolate coins) in the stocking.  The gifts were roughly:

- One from us

- One from the dog (always clothing, because she worries that we are cold)

- A book token from my mother

- A gift from my BIL/SIL that we actually chose

- an Amazon token from one of my brothers

- a gift from the other sibling

[DawnM]

I used to LOVE gift giving when they were little and I admit I went a little crazy.   I wrapped each small item in their stocking.   I wrapped each item of clothing.   And then I would wrap some gifts that came in parts separately just because I loved watching them open gifts and I loved seeing the tree full of presents underneath.

But, alas, now they are young adults (except the little one) and they wake up at noon or later on Christmas morning, don't really want to be bothered with opening anything because they want money (they don't beg for it, but one year I just asked if they would prefer money and they said yes.).  

All that to say, I never was consistent with numbers but I did try to give them the same number of gifts when they were little.   Then they didn't care so much because they knew I spent the same amount on each, even if the numbers weren't the same.

[Melanie32]

When my kids were little I counted presents but now that they are grown I go by cost. I spend around $150 per kid now. When they were little, they would get around 6 or so presents each. We stuffed their stockings with very inexpensive things. 
 

My kids were the only grandkids on both sides for years and are still the only grandkids on one side. My MIL goes crazy at Christmas, spending thousands of dollars a year. She spends way more on my kids than I do. I like to try to keep Christmas more simple and less commercialized so it always bothered me that she spent so much. 

Edited November 2, 2023 by Melanie32

[MercyA]

Thank you, @Catwoman. I'm sure it looks gorgeous!!! 

My parents are very frugal, but my mom always went all out for Christmas. I loved seeing the stacks of pretty gifts under the glow of the tree on Christmas morning. 🙂 

Edited November 2, 2023 by MercyA

[marbel]

9 hours ago, Drama Llama said:

For those of you whose relatives give a ton of gifts, has anyone had any success getting it reduced?

Things have gotten really out of control here.  

Part of the issue is that I think all of the family is hesitant to treat one set of cousins differently from the other, and my SIL really wants her kids to get a ton of stuff.  

So your SIL controls how many gifts all the kids in the extended family get from their grandparents/aunts/uncles? You can't ask them to reduce the number they give your kids? If she suddenly went minimalist and announced that she didn't want gifts anymore, would gifts to all the cousins stop? 

I'm sorry. I know there are a lot of issues and it's complex. But, ugh. 💗

ETA: So I didn't actually answer your question but I have never had that experience. My kids are much younger than their cousins and though I gave gifts to all my nieces and nephews into their teens, my siblings were inconsistent with gifts for my kids. It never mattered. Sometimes there wasn't money for gifts, and sometimes things were just random. Like when my brother sent us an XBox with a bunch of games, including Grand Theft Auto and other inappropriate games (my kids were about 11 and 9 then). 

When I was a kid, we spent Christmas afternoon with my father's side of the family, but we got together after gifts were opened and there were no exchanges there. Some of my cousins got a lot of stuff, more than others. It didn't matter because we were separate families. I didn't like comparing gifts because I got a lot of books (requested) and they thought that was weird. 

Edited November 2, 2023 by marbel