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kbutton

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Everything posted by kbutton

  1. I’m so sorry. It’s been extra Monday with a dose of existential fuming thrown in for fun here too.
  2. I think I started lurking around 2013. We were considering homeschooling, and every time I searched for a curriculum review, the forums popped up.
  3. Yes to an oxyclean soak. Another option might be TSP—the real stuff (seems like it mixes up pink), not the new stuff.
  4. I would consider asking for a referral for autoimmune issues. Some have skin involvement, including some rare ones. MCAS is a possibility too. Zyrtec does nothing for me and makes me sleepy. I’m better off with Allegra (and take multiple doses under physician guidance). For most any allergic reaction, adding in an H2 blocker (Pepcid) also helps a bit.
  5. That is encouraging if true, though I also think that the high rate of Covid infection still makes this a big societal burden. I am not going to argue that the flu is not serious though—it has long-term effects much more often than we give it credit for. I wonder at what point after the 1918 flu pandemic that people stopped seeing a dramatic difference in after effects and illness rates. I know they had post-infection complications (Awakenings movie) that unfolded much later.
  6. DH is one of just a few people in his ER that mask, and I think the rest mask only during waves. There are two are hospitals that reinstated masking this winter for providers and staff, but not his.
  7. My iPhone will silence calls and texts (except for those from my emergency contacts), but all of my alarms ring when the phone is on vibrate.
  8. I’ve been concerned about alarms in active shooter situations. One reason that it would be nice for my kid to have his phone is to set alarms to remind him to use study hall to Zoom his DE teacher to ask questions during her office hours or to remind himself to take/not take the bus, bring xyz home, etc.
  9. So many of those unwritten rules are school or even grade-specific and are completely different than when I went to school. If I had switched schools in 9th instead of 8th, it wouldn’t occur to me to that lockers were combo locked instead of keys like my high school’s. My parents’ advice when I was in school was healthy, which is exactly why none of it applied to my school experience, lol! I had an unusually snotty class full of people who resisted the most basic stuff. Our class was infamous for making super awesome teachers break down and rant at the class for their lack of cooperation and general…not sure what word applies. Intractability? Culture around asking for help is so varied. I agree that it’s important to ask, but with gifted kids, let’s just say imposter syndrome is real. And to be honest, there is a reason the Far Side comic about the gifted kid pushing the pull door (or maybe the reverse) is funny—we all someone like that, and that person is probably tired of the dynamic. And asking for help and being able to identify what is missing when that help doesn’t work aren’t remotely the same skill. I agree, but their capability of learning or problem-solving doesn’t always align with the situation, and a lot of adult’s won’t go that extra mile. They assume that “but they won’t try” or “they gave up too easily” is the whole story. Yikes, good for some, but my word, the assumption that we should stop asking people and talk the phone…
  10. Good quick thinking on your DD’s part!
  11. I’m more concerned about what kind of environment we’re providing when kids can’t or won’t problem solve outside of actual negative experiences and duress. My kid will probably have a rolling small suitcase next year. He has health issues. It’s a small campus, so maybe it won’t matter.
  12. Yeah, there might be someone who could help with “just remember if it doesn’t work the first time, you might have gone the wrong way” or something, but once you realize you can’t do something 90% or more of peers are doing easily, the lizard brain comes alive, and then you can’t connect. Brains are weird!
  13. It’s impossible to learn if literally everyone that shows you leaves out information about turning past zero or whatever it is that finally made me successful. They usually just dial it all over really fast. Even knowing if it’s left right left or the reverse—it’s like watching someone speed solve a Rubik’s cube.
  14. My locker was mostly useful for my outwear (cold climate), a “half-time” switch of books (long hallways sprawled out), and a stash of gym clothes (we had to have eight semesters of gym, .25 credits each). My kid goes to a small school, but he keeps food in his in case he forgets lunch or had an unusually hungry day. (Lunch plan is lame, expensive, and only reserved in advance.)
  15. P.S. some people are not able to learn physical tasks with an audience, even a friendly one.
  16. I was rarely around upperclassman near a locker. Home rooms/lockers were segregated by grade, and during lunch, we couldn’t wander the halls. We had just a few minutes to go back to our locker if we needed to. Call me foolish and stupid by the measure of this thread. I couldn’t open a combo lock when I transferred to a school that had them. They were not built in, so I brought a key lock from home, and the home room teacher kept a spare. In high school, all the lockers had keys. I asked and practiced with a teacher. It was humiliating. He was baffled and tossed up his hands. The longer it went on, the less my brain could even engage with the task because I was so humiliated (he wasn’t mean, but everyone was aware of my ineptitude). At college, our post office boxes came with actual instructions for opening the combination lock, and I was like, “Why couldn’t someone have just shown me this way?!?” Worked like a charm. And guess what? I don’t remember how to open them anymore even after years of using one daily. I would have to Google. Last I knew, Understood.org had a picture and clear instructions like the ones provided to me in college (not known for hand-holding).
  17. Your complicated situation (even more complicated than I knew) is one that came to mind. We’d have been able to muddle through some kind of second career scenario, but I think it would’ve utterly broken us all, and DH would’ve had to take a different career direction.
  18. For sure; I feel like secrecy/privacy are being used sometimes as synonymous concepts. They are related but not interchangeable in all situations.
  19. Random disjointed thoughts. I don’t think secrecy and privacy are the same. I think it’s odd that people assign so much weight to health issues when we have so many chronically ill people in the world. It’s just a reality. We should be able to accept differing levels of need and ability to meet public expectations while being in need. If it were for a badly broken leg from skiing, I suspect people would still be speculating just because of who she is.
  20. I think we also need to acknowledge that for some people, working would not net them enough extra income to help because of childcare costs or costs inherent to those specific children (my kids needed tons of things that would not have been IEP eligible even if they were in school and do not have full insurance coverage). Sometimes it’s logistics combined with finances. Sometimes it’s not being able to put a medically complicated kid in daycare of whatever.
  21. I’m not a moderator, but I think you’re tying together the intellectual origins of certain things vs. stumping or agitating.
  22. Some of the fundamentalist independent Baptist churches that I knew (but didn’t attend) from my youth are fundamentalist but not patriarchal. I make a distinction between conservative gender roles and patriarchy, and I’m not going to argue about the difference. Some would see that as a continuum, but it plays out very differently. That doesn’t mean that these circles aren’t at risk or that some of them aren’t patriarchal—Faith-Manor’s experience is that they are. My experience is that many are not and that it’s less fundamentalist churches that are now flirting with patriarchy. There is also an age difference—older fundamentalists might put up with more entitled husbands than patriarchal husbands but believe in education and opportunities and voting. Where I’m from It’s more present with middle-aged and slightly older or those raised by parents who were maybe flirting with patriarchy but ultimately didn’t buy the whole bag. Sometimes parents move on, but they don’t realize what their kids absorbed (or were maybe taught by zealous people in Sunday School, etc.), and they don’t realize their kids grew up and gravitated toward that stuff. I routinely talk to people who really are shocked at what other people who look alike on paper (conservative views of marriage, etc.) are doing—if they believe it at all. That’s the insidious part—the crazies take cover behind the convictionally conservative people who would never take xyz principle “that far.” They wouldn’t go off the deep end, so apparently neither would another person with overlapping beliefs. David French talks from time to time about fundamentalism as a set of conservative beliefs vs. as a fundamentalist mindset and how those are different. It makes it harder to discuss if you can’t see or discuss the difference because fundamentalism means multiple things.
  23. It depends. If I’m with other people that have organized it or am visiting a local person that should know, I’d have been prone to trust them—Not so much now, but when at the time in life I was referring to when I made the comment. I think so much goes back to what you know from experience unless warnings are posted. Touristy places and touristy things are often assumed safe because everyone knows someone who’s been to that place.
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