Would you buy this house?

[Kathryn]

So, we have an opportunity to buy a house that is 25% bigger than ours and would give each of our kids their own bedroom for less than 70% of the home's value. It has new siding, new kitchen, new roof, new heat/AC, and she is talking about doing new carpets throughout before she sells it to us. The problem is that we aren't crazy about the area and the house isn't our ideal. It's not bad, it's just not our ideal and it's on the opposite side of the city from where we and ALL our activities currently are. I've lived on this side of the city my entire life. But if we hated it, we could sell and walk away with around $50K whereas here we will be lucky to walk away with enough for closing costs on another house. Even if we don't like it, it would put us in a much better position. We'd be fools not to take this, right? Ugh, I'm such a creature of habit. I feel like this is a no-brainer, but I'm so not excited about the process of moving. She's also willing to work with us on timeline of getting our house sold and move some "stuff" into the house so ours doesn't look so crowded and cluttered (this is my mom's best friend who is moving in with her and could afford to just hand us the house if she wanted).

[Rachel]

I think I would pass.

[Xahm]

It depends. How big is your city? If "other side" means being an hour from everything you know, I'd only do it if I really needed the larger house or financial boost. If it means 20 minutes, that would make it far more attractive.

[Calizzy]

Yeah, I don't think I'd take it. I always say a sale isn't really a good deal if I don't want/need what is being offered. Being on the other side of all your activities is a big drain.

[StaceyinLA]

How much more costly would it be to live there versus where you are living? Would your housing costs go up? Also, is the house you are in your ideal house?

 

If the cost is the same, I might consider it if it "across town" meant 30 minutes or less (unless I had to do activities every, single day across town, in which case I highly doubt it).

[Spryte]

Yeh, I'd probably pass, too. If the house is on the other side of the city, that probably means a big increase in travel time and dealing with traffic. That's a headache.

 

A bigger house is nice, but time together is better!

[AMJ]

Why is it priced so low?  Are you sure you'd be able to sell it again if you truly don't like it?

 

I'd pass.  Buying and selling houses is a lot of work, as is moving and settling in.  On top of that is the effect it has on your credit history.  I vote for holding out for something you truly want to live in.  Usually when there's a lot of "upgrades" or "updates" and the price is low there is something wrong with the place or the location.

[displace]

Location is most important.

[wintermom]

I'd look for something you really like in the area you want. The carpets would put me off, too. New or old, I don't ever want carpets again.

[Annie G]

I'd probably strongly consider buying it.  I'm not someone who thinks a house has to be perfect- location, color, etc.  It's the family inside that makes it a home so I would think about it before deciding. Drive from the house to your activities and see how long it really takes. Look at the neighborhood and make sure it's kid friendly enough for your kids.  

 

It sounds like your biggest concerns are distance to activities and the fact that you've lived on the other side of town your whole life.  #1 could be an issue. #2 probably wouldn't be for me, but might be a deal killer for you.  

 

Since this woman and your mom are BFFs you might want to have a chat to give her a heads up that if you don't like living in the new place then you plan to sell.  I suggest that because if she sells it to you at a large discount and then a year later you sell at full price, she might get upset and think you took advantage of her.  

 

 

[Bluegoat]

I think location is important, but I would consider it based on what you had said.  My main question would be, what kind of activities and such are you talking about?

 

It's natural that when you live in a place your life will start to revolve around it geographically.  But - that could also happen in your new place.  So is it that you will now have a daily commute to a job, or is it that you will be looking at finding new, closer locations for fun and extra-curriculars?  How long and often would it be for the things where you can't make a change?  What is the new area like in terms of resources, walkability, and so on?

 

It could be fun to move to another area. 

[Seasider]

Location, location, location.

 

So so house in a great location? Tempting.

 

Great house in an undesirable location? Don't be tempted.

 

If you proceed, be sure to have it checked out for structural integrity. Also really investigate the neighborhood. You need to go in knowing whether or the investment would have good resale value when you are ready to move on.

 

ETA if you are thinking of flipping the house for a profit, you need to be very realistic about the expenses involved. You will need to have inspections (because if you don't, another buyer may find something major that will take a chunk out of your anticipated profits), make repairs, pay taxes, closing costs and real estate agent commissions.

Edited August 29, 2016 by Seasider

[Carol in Cal.]

I suspect that deciding to sell this and making money on the deal would be considered somewhat of a betrayal by your friend, who is sacrificing to give you a good deal on a house that she presumably liked living in.  So I would not be cavillear about selling it if you really don't like it.

 

Plus you really don't like it. 

 

So don't buy it.  It's one thing to buy an investment property you hate.  It's quite another to buy a house that you hate.  You will never want to be in it, which is a lousy way to live your life if you can avoid it.

 

 

[OneStepAtATime]

1.  How long a drive would it be to your current activities from the new location? 

2.  Is the house you currently live in your dream home?

3.  Are you and your family attached to the location you are currently in for specific reasons or just because it is familiar?

4.  Would there be equivalent options or possibly even better options for activities in the new location?

5.  Are the things that are not perfect in the new home strictly cosmetic or is it the layout/neighborhood that bugs you?

6.  How does each member of the family feel?

7.  Would there be a significant increase in property taxes/homeowner's insurance/yard maintenance/utility bills/etc.?

8.  Do you and your family have close friends in your current neighborhood or within easy driving distance?

9.  Is the area you are currently living deteriorating, maintaining its value or increasing in value?  What about the new location?

10.  Does your current house need significant repairs (not cosmetic upgrades)?

 

Honestly, I would consider it, depending on the answers to the above questions.  You would be getting a house that already has some significant and costly improvements done for you.  And if she is considering replacing the carpets for you, you might have the option to pick out carpet you liked (and pay any difference if what you like is higher quality) or maybe ask her to credit you the difference between replacing the carpet and putting in another type of flooring if you don't like carpet.  

 

But I would not leap in blindly and I wouldn't buy it just so I could sell it again fairly quickly.  I would absolutely sit down and seriously examine my answers to the above questions.  I would also drive around that area and do some significant research.  And if you decide you are genuinely interested I would have a thorough house inspection and appraisal to be 100% certain that what you are being told is accurate (not that she is lying but maybe she is making assumptions without thorough data).  Good luck in your decision...

Edited August 29, 2016 by OneStepAtATime

[Kathryn]

To answer a few questions, the woman who would sell to us is my mom's best friend. She inherited millions of dollars recently and does not need the money (we are talking about house prices that are six figures and begin with a 1). She would be doing this as a kindness to us but also because she has severe anxiety issues and is extremely nervous about the whole process of selling. This would be her easy way out.

 

We do not like our current house at all. We have wanted to leave for years, but don't have the money. We have two boys sharing a room who do not get along at all and it makes life very difficult. In addition, we have issues with the exact location of our house (utilities/easements that mean we can't landscape as we wish or put up a shed or addition). We haven't done anything because I have my own anxiety about trying to sell and about increasing our housing costs (this deal would keep us about the same when considering all factors, but with much more equity). I guess the only not "ideal" about her house is that the upstairs rooms' ceilings are unique so that the boys couldn't have bunk beds, and the master bath is a shared one with the hall. I'd love more space, but it's already much more than we have now, and better laid out for our family than we have now. The yard is much better. It's in much better condition.

 

Our homeschool group is here, soccer, and scouts are here. Depending on traffic, it's a 20-30 minute drive from there. Neither DH nor I have friends here. My only "friends" are my kids' friends, but when your kid is autistic, friends don't often last long. DH's friends are from work. He works at a different location around the city or even state each day, so commute for him isn't an issue. It's not really that our area is great, it's just what's comfortable, you know? All the things we do here, we could do there. Our area is less expensive in housing, but other expenses would be the same.

 

Really, it comes down to anxiety and not wanting to leave my comfort zone. But, we do really want out of this house.

[Pam L in Mid Tenn]

I drive 20 to thirty minutes for all our activities!!!

Will you have some money to remodel in a few years time? To make it ideal?

It sounds like you like this house BETTER than you like your current house!

You will be able to paint and decorate and make it really cute!

Or live in it a few years... while looking for your ideal house... and sell for a nice profit later.

Think... What can I do to love this house? If you can't think of anything... then maybe pass on the offer.

OR... If you can think of some things you DO love about it, or COULD love about it.... then maybe buy it.

[Scarlett]

To answer a few questions, the woman who would sell to us is my mom's best friend. She inherited millions of dollars recently and does not need the money (we are talking about house prices that are six figures and begin with a 1). She would be doing this as a kindness to us but also because she has severe anxiety issues and is extremely nervous about the whole process of selling. This would be her easy way out.

 

We do not like our current house at all. We have wanted to leave for years, but don't have the money. We have two boys sharing a room who do not get along at all and it makes life very difficult. In addition, we have issues with the exact location of our house (utilities/easements that mean we can't landscape as we wish or put up a shed or addition). We haven't done anything because I have my own anxiety about trying to sell and about increasing our housing costs (this deal would keep us about the same when considering all factors, but with much more equity). I guess the only not "ideal" about her house is that the upstairs rooms' ceilings are unique so that the boys couldn't have bunk beds, and the master bath is a shared one with the hall. I'd love more space, but it's already much more than we have now, and better laid out for our family than we have now. The yard is much better. It's in much better condition.

 

Our homeschool group is here, soccer, and scouts are here. Depending on traffic, it's a 20-30 minute drive from there. Neither DH nor I have friends here. My only "friends" are my kids' friends, but when your kid is autistic, friends don't often last long. DH's friends are from work. He works at a different location around the city or even state each day, so commute for him isn't an issue. It's not really that our area is great, it's just what's comfortable, you know? All the things we do here, we could do there. Our area is less expensive in housing, but other expenses would be the same.

 

Really, it comes down to anxiety and not wanting to leave my comfort zone. But, we do really want out of this house.

With all the additional info I would probably do it. And I am one who considers location top priority in almost all,cases....but it sounds like this new house is not a bad location...just not in your comfort zone.

[Anne in CA]

I agree that the additional information means I would probably bite the bullet and move. You are having daily stress from the house you have now. This could really improve your quality of life once you make the adjustments.

[TX Native]

Would you buy the same house at market value? I would be tempted to do this as an investment if the deal was the same and I did not have a personal connection with the seller. If you buy this house from someone who is selling below market value and getting it in tip top shape as a personal favor only because of the personal connection, you may feel forever indebted to that person whether you realize it or not. There would likely be awkwardness with the seller if you resale at market value or if the house develops a major issue after you buy it. Also, unless I was in dire need of something, I would feel uncomfortable accepting such generosity from a rich friend. If she were to offer the house at near the same price to John Doe off the street, then I would feel less uncomfortable about accepting such a great offer.

[Bluegoat]

To answer a few questions, the woman who would sell to us is my mom's best friend. She inherited millions of dollars recently and does not need the money (we are talking about house prices that are six figures and begin with a 1). She would be doing this as a kindness to us but also because she has severe anxiety issues and is extremely nervous about the whole process of selling. This would be her easy way out.

 

We do not like our current house at all. We have wanted to leave for years, but don't have the money. We have two boys sharing a room who do not get along at all and it makes life very difficult. In addition, we have issues with the exact location of our house (utilities/easements that mean we can't landscape as we wish or put up a shed or addition). We haven't done anything because I have my own anxiety about trying to sell and about increasing our housing costs (this deal would keep us about the same when considering all factors, but with much more equity). I guess the only not "ideal" about her house is that the upstairs rooms' ceilings are unique so that the boys couldn't have bunk beds, and the master bath is a shared one with the hall. I'd love more space, but it's already much more than we have now, and better laid out for our family than we have now. The yard is much better. It's in much better condition.

 

Our homeschool group is here, soccer, and scouts are here. Depending on traffic, it's a 20-30 minute drive from there. Neither DH nor I have friends here. My only "friends" are my kids' friends, but when your kid is autistic, friends don't often last long. DH's friends are from work. He works at a different location around the city or even state each day, so commute for him isn't an issue. It's not really that our area is great, it's just what's comfortable, you know? All the things we do here, we could do there. Our area is less expensive in housing, but other expenses would be the same.

 

Really, it comes down to anxiety and not wanting to leave my comfort zone. But, we do really want out of this house.

 

 

In this case, I would almost certainly move as long as an inspection doesn't reveal serious problems.  20 or 30 min is not really close, but I suspect many of those groups could be replaced with something closer.  And it sounds like you really need to move and won't likely get a better opportunity.

[regentrude]

Location, location, location.

If location does not work for you, I would not buy the house, no matter how nice the house itself is.

[gardenmom5]

So, we have an opportunity to buy a house that is 25% bigger than ours and would give each of our kids their own bedroom for less than 70% of the home's value. It has new siding, new kitchen, new roof, new heat/AC, and she is talking about doing new carpets throughout before she sells it to us. The problem is that we aren't crazy about the area and the house isn't our ideal. It's not bad, it's just not our ideal and it's on the opposite side of the city from where we and ALL our activities currently are. I've lived on this side of the city my entire life. But if we hated it, we could sell and walk away with around $50K whereas here we will be lucky to walk away with enough for closing costs on another house. Even if we don't like it, it would put us in a much better position. We'd be fools not to take this, right? Ugh, I'm such a creature of habit. I feel like this is a no-brainer, but I'm so not excited about the process of moving. She's also willing to work with us on timeline of getting our house sold and move some "stuff" into the house so ours doesn't look so crowded and cluttered (this is my mom's best friend who is moving in with her and could afford to just hand us the house if she wanted).

 

location location location.   but it sounds like it's in a 'better' neighborhood if it could sell faster than yours?  how far would you be having to drive to commute for activities?  how many 'trips'?

[Tap]

Is the drive an additional 20 minutes? or are you replacing a 5-10 minute drive with a 15-20 minute one?  How many days per week, times per day do you go to these activities? 

 

If you usually drive kids to soccer and then go home, to return a hour later, but if you normally stay there anyways or combine errands, it may not be so bad.

 

If you go to coop and then have multiple sports a day for the kids make sure to add it all up and consider if it is worth it to you.

 

I don't mind driving.  I wouldn't think twice about a 20 minute drive (common commute time for all my kids activities).  But I also tried to keep my driving down to 1 hour per day with everything combined.  (one year we did have a sport 45 minutes away though). 

 

I know you mentioned bunk beds, but can you replace them with trundle beds instead (assuming you want them for sleep overs etc)?  If the boys don't share a room, you may not need bunk beds anymore so maybe a roll away or just a couple sleeping mats would be good enough for now.  My kids had full size beds and kids sleeping over usually just slept in the same bed. 

 

[Outdoorsy Type]

I might give it a trial year if it wouldn't set you back, and you could make money on it. Would your mom's friend be upset if you sold it after a year?

[Spryte]

With your additional info, I think I'd do it.

 

A 20-30 minute drive wouldn't phase me. When you said the other side of the city, I envisioned an hour+ depending on heavy traffic - like our local city. Not the same ballpark!

 

I think it sounds like a great solution for all of you.

[TX Native]

I typed, paused for a math lesson, and posted before reading your update. Could the kids do a co-op, scouts group and soccer on the new side of town? It sounds like you don't have a permanent reasons stay on your current side of town which makes a big difference. With updated info, I would consider if I felt the house would be functional over the long run and pending inspection. I would still feel indebted to the seller, even though money isn't an issue for her.

Edited August 29, 2016 by TX native

[Janeway]

No, I would not.

 

If it is not in an ideal area, you might have trouble selling it. And then, even if you do sell it, there are costs associated with moving and selling. Plus, your lives would be re-arranged with commuting and all.

[Janeway]

To answer a few questions, the woman who would sell to us is my mom's best friend. She inherited millions of dollars recently and does not need the money (we are talking about house prices that are six figures and begin with a 1). She would be doing this as a kindness to us but also because she has severe anxiety issues and is extremely nervous about the whole process of selling. This would be her easy way out.

 

We do not like our current house at all. We have wanted to leave for years, but don't have the money. We have two boys sharing a room who do not get along at all and it makes life very difficult. In addition, we have issues with the exact location of our house (utilities/easements that mean we can't landscape as we wish or put up a shed or addition). We haven't done anything because I have my own anxiety about trying to sell and about increasing our housing costs (this deal would keep us about the same when considering all factors, but with much more equity). I guess the only not "ideal" about her house is that the upstairs rooms' ceilings are unique so that the boys couldn't have bunk beds, and the master bath is a shared one with the hall. I'd love more space, but it's already much more than we have now, and better laid out for our family than we have now. The yard is much better. It's in much better condition.

 

Our homeschool group is here, soccer, and scouts are here. Depending on traffic, it's a 20-30 minute drive from there. Neither DH nor I have friends here. My only "friends" are my kids' friends, but when your kid is autistic, friends don't often last long. DH's friends are from work. He works at a different location around the city or even state each day, so commute for him isn't an issue. It's not really that our area is great, it's just what's comfortable, you know? All the things we do here, we could do there. Our area is less expensive in housing, but other expenses would be the same.

 

Really, it comes down to anxiety and not wanting to leave my comfort zone. But, we do really want out of this house.

Maybe it would be worth it then. I don't know. I find driving far to be harsh. But maybe you can re-establish activities and friends on that side. Keep in mind, my child with ASD will do anything to avoid a long car drive. If you have a child with ASD, this may become an issue for you too.

[alisoncooks]

I'd go for it.  I imagine that giving your boys separate room would reduce your stress so much, enough to make it worth the stress of moving.

And if you don't like it, it sounds like it would be easier (later) to move elsewhere from there.  

[Anne]

Based on your update, I would do it - this sounds like a great opportunity.

 

Anne

[ktgrok]

If you can eventually switch to soccer clubs, etc that are on the new side of town, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Sounds like it's just different, not worse area. And the day to day living will be much better. 

[goldberry]

:iagree:   

 

Based on your update, I would do it - this sounds like a great opportunity.

Anne

 

[Harriet Vane]

No.

 

Moving is expensive and it's a royal pain.

 

Stick with the community you have built and you love unless you have a major, super-compelling reason to move. I would not go to an entirely different section of the city unless I looooooved it there.

[Harriet Vane]

No.

 

Moving is expensive and it's a royal pain.

 

Stick with the community you have built and you love unless you have a major, super-compelling reason to move. I would not go to an entirely different section of the city unless I looooooved it there.

 

 

Just read your update, and now I am waffling. Actually, there seems a lot of advantages to moving. If you're not in love with your community and you actively dislike your house, then perhaps a move is appropriate.

[OneStepAtATime]

To answer a few questions, the woman who would sell to us is my mom's best friend. She inherited millions of dollars recently and does not need the money (we are talking about house prices that are six figures and begin with a 1). She would be doing this as a kindness to us but also because she has severe anxiety issues and is extremely nervous about the whole process of selling. This would be her easy way out.

 

We do not like our current house at all. We have wanted to leave for years, but don't have the money. We have two boys sharing a room who do not get along at all and it makes life very difficult. In addition, we have issues with the exact location of our house (utilities/easements that mean we can't landscape as we wish or put up a shed or addition). We haven't done anything because I have my own anxiety about trying to sell and about increasing our housing costs (this deal would keep us about the same when considering all factors, but with much more equity). I guess the only not "ideal" about her house is that the upstairs rooms' ceilings are unique so that the boys couldn't have bunk beds, and the master bath is a shared one with the hall. I'd love more space, but it's already much more than we have now, and better laid out for our family than we have now. The yard is much better. It's in much better condition.

 

Our homeschool group is here, soccer, and scouts are here. Depending on traffic, it's a 20-30 minute drive from there. Neither DH nor I have friends here. My only "friends" are my kids' friends, but when your kid is autistic, friends don't often last long. DH's friends are from work. He works at a different location around the city or even state each day, so commute for him isn't an issue. It's not really that our area is great, it's just what's comfortable, you know? All the things we do here, we could do there. Our area is less expensive in housing, but other expenses would be the same.

 

Really, it comes down to anxiety and not wanting to leave my comfort zone. But, we do really want out of this house.

This update changes everything, IMHO.

 

Pros for moving:

1.  You are not happy with your current home and have wanted out for a long time.  

2.  You have not had the money to move and you have very specific, valid reasons for not being happy where you currently live.  

3.  You would be moving into a home that better suits your space needs.

4.  You would be moving into a home that has had most of the major, costly infrasructure areas replaced (including the roof and AC unit which can be a huge cost).  

5.  You would be alleviating the issue of two siblings sharing a room that do not get along at all.

6.  You would theoretically have instant equity.

7.  This move would not affect the commute of your husband.

8.  Your children are young enough that almost certainly the activities they go to now could be accessed through closer options in the new location but a 20-30 minute drive is honestly not that bad, IMHO, even if it takes some time to find a better fit closer to the new house.

9.  None of you have close friends you would be leaving behind.

10.  Since you have been looking to move anyway, but have serious anxiety about selling/moving, going this route actually eliminates some of the inherent issues with moving (not all, obviously, but definitely some).

11.  It sounds like you would be moving into a better area of town?  If so, your housing value may increase whereas maybe it wouldn't where you are currently located?

 

Cons:

1.  You have anxiety about change.

2.  Because of unusual ceilings in the bedrooms bunk beds would not be an option.

(I realize that some people would also be concerned regarding obligation to the current homeowner but I won't list that here since you did not address this and I personally feel that could be dealt with without big issues.)

 

Honestly, there seem to be a tremendous number of positives and very, very few negatives to doing this.  I would definitely consider everything very carefully and absolutely have a home inspection and appraisal done but it really sounds like a very viable choice for you and your family.

 

Ask yourself this:  If you badly want out of your current home but have so far been unable to do so, do you see that changing in the foreseeable future?  Do you see a much better opportunity presenting itself in the next couple of years if you don't buy this home?  Your children are still young but as they get into Middle School and High School moving may become harder for them (and for you).  Do you think moving would even be a good idea if you wait a few years?  What could you do with your current home to make it more to your liking?  And could you afford to do so?

Edited August 29, 2016 by OneStepAtATime

[wintermom]

With the additional info, I'd definitely consider moving. However, I'd want to step very carefully being that the seller is your mom's good friend and she has anxiety issues. There is a chance that you'll not feel completely comfortable putting yourself a little in her debt. Also, will the house be completely empty when you move it? With a private sale between family and friends, along with the special money situation, there could be some things that might pop up which wouldn't normally be there in a more formal and independent sale with a realtor. 

[Guest]

I agree that the additional information means I would probably bite the bullet and move. You are having daily stress from the house you have now. This could really improve your quality of life once you make the adjustments.

Agreed. If you current house was something you liked or could tolerate? Fine. Otherwise I'd take the move and maybe switch some activities closer the next season. Good luck and keep us posted as to how this proceeds!

[Seasider]

This update changes everything, IMHO.

 

Pros for moving:

1. You are not happy with your current home and have wanted out for a long time.

2. You have not had the money to move and you have very specific, valid reasons for not being happy where you currently live.

3. You would be moving into a home that better suits your space needs.

4. You would be moving into a home that has had most of the major, costly infrasructure areas replaced (including the roof and AC unit which can be a huge cost).

5. You would be alleviating the issue of two siblings sharing a room that do not get along at all.

6. You would theoretically have instant equity.

7. This move would not affect the commute of your husband.

8. Your children are young enough that almost certainly the activities they go to now could be accessed through closer options in the new location but a 20-30 minute drive is honestly not that bad, IMHO, even if it takes some time to find a better fit closer to the new house.

9. None of you have close friends you would be leaving behind.

10. Since you have been looking to move anyway, but have serious anxiety about selling/moving, going this route actually eliminates some of the inherent issues with moving (not all, obviously, but definitely some).

11. It sounds like you would be moving into a better area of town? If so, your housing value may increase whereas maybe it wouldn't where you are currently located?

 

Cons:

1. You have anxiety about change.

2. Because of unusual ceilings in the bedrooms bunk beds would not be an option.

(I realize that some people would also be concerned regarding obligation to the current homeowner but I won't list that here since you did not address this and I personally feel that could be dealt with without big issues.)

 

Honestly, there seem to be a tremendous number of positives and very, very few negatives to doing this. I would definitely consider everything very carefully and absolutely have a home inspection and appraisal done but it really sounds like a very viable choice for you and your family.

 

Ask yourself this: If you badly want out of your current home but have so far been unable to do so, do you see that changing in the foreseeable future? Do you see a much better opportunity presenting itself in the next couple of years if you don't buy this home? Your children are still young but as they get into Middle School and High School moving may become harder for them (and for you). Do you think moving would even be a good idea if you wait a few years? What could you do with your current home to make it more to your liking? And could you afford to do so?

Yes this new info is helpful. I would be sure to ask about her average monthly costs for utilities, garbage pickup, homeowners insurance, those sort of things, just to be sure the monthly expenses remain within your budget.

[BlsdMama]

So, we have an opportunity to buy a house that is 25% bigger than ours and would give each of our kids their own bedroom for less than 70% of the home's value. It has new siding, new kitchen, new roof, new heat/AC, and she is talking about doing new carpets throughout before she sells it to us. The problem is that we aren't crazy about the area and the house isn't our ideal. It's not bad, it's just not our ideal and it's on the opposite side of the city from where we and ALL our activities currently are. I've lived on this side of the city my entire life. But if we hated it, we could sell and walk away with around $50K whereas here we will be lucky to walk away with enough for closing costs on another house. Even if we don't like it, it would put us in a much better position. We'd be fools not to take this, right? Ugh, I'm such a creature of habit. I feel like this is a no-brainer, but I'm so not excited about the process of moving. She's also willing to work with us on timeline of getting our house sold and move some "stuff" into the house so ours doesn't look so crowded and cluttered (this is my mom's best friend who is moving in with her and could afford to just hand us the house if she wanted).

 

 

I wouldn't do it.

 

Area is important and proximity to activities is underappreciated.  Just my thoughts.  I don't know how big your city is but if it involved a "commute" of sorts (traffic signals, traffic, planning, etc.) it would be an even bigger no.

[OneStepAtATime]

I wouldn't do it.

 

Area is important and proximity to activities is underappreciated.  Just my thoughts.  I don't know how big your city is but if it involved a "commute" of sorts (traffic signals, traffic, planning, etc.) it would be an even bigger no.

I agree 100%, area is important and proximity to activities is definitely something I value (currently living in area without and badly wishing we didn't).  However, her first post did not have important pieces of info in it that pertain to this.  There are actually options for activities where they could be moving to.  The commute isn't bad, either, IMHO, if they needed to continue going to the original locations for a while.  Have you read her update?  There is a lot of info that the first post did not cover.  

[bettyandbob]

I was going to say no, but I got to your update. I'd go for it. Your dc need the space. With special needs that can be very important.

 

Your kids are young, you will probably get establish with new activities closer over time. You just don't know what's available right now and you have never needed to explore. 

[SproutMamaK]

With the info in your update... yes, I would do it. Your current location isn't great, it's just familiar. Realistically, you don't have much to lose in your current location. And if you hate it after giving it a try loving at the new place for a year or two, you can always move (without even taking a financial hit). There doesn't really seem to be a downside.

[38carrots]

After your update--yes, absolutely.

[KungFuPanda]

I can't see a compelling reason to walk away from free real estate. It seems like a wise investment. If your kids have their own rooms, you won't even NEED bunk beds. I'm all for never being in the car a minute more than I have to AND for living in my comfortable rut, but this is a gift too good to pass up.

Edited August 30, 2016 by KungFuPanda

[Truscifi]

Move. You don't like where you are. Anxiety over moving will be gone after you move and adjust to the new place. Stress from your living arrangements being inadequate if you stay will be much worse in the long run.

[shawthorne44]

With the update on the reason for her selling, I'd buy it.   You want to move anyway, and it sounds like the worse that will happen is that you guys will sometimes have a longer drive.  

[Kathryn]

Thank you. I appreciate you guys helping me work through this. I was up all night thinking about this and mapping out where we can do things over there. I think most everything I can replicate over there, but I think I'll want to keep our pediatrician (hopefully not needing to go often!) and scouts, at least for now. We would be closer to some things like our church though.

 

The comments about utilities reminded me to ask and hers are significantly lower. Water/sewer is priced less because she's in the city, electricity is less because her house is better built, has newer AC, and shaded by trees. We pay $200 a year for trash pickup but hers is included in her property taxes. Property taxes are double ($600 to $1200), but with taking PMI out of the equation, we'd be coming out ahead there too, especially when considering the trash is paid for in there.

 

We had a realtor come to the house last night and it looks like we've got some work to do to get out of here in as good of shape as we can which will be difficult with DH working and going to school, but she's willing to work with us on timing too. On the one hand, I just want it done, but on the other, I don't know where to start with all that needs to happen!

[Scarlett]

Thank you. I appreciate you guys helping me work through this. I was up all night thinking about this and mapping out where we can do things over there. I think most everything I can replicate over there, but I think I'll want to keep our pediatrician (hopefully not needing to go often!) and scouts, at least for now. We would be closer to some things like our church though.

 

The comments about utilities reminded me to ask and hers are significantly lower. Water/sewer is priced less because she's in the city, electricity is less because her house is better built, has newer AC, and shaded by trees. We pay $200 a year for trash pickup but hers is included in her property taxes. Property taxes are double ($600 to $1200), but with taking PMI out of the equation, we'd be coming out ahead there too, especially when considering the trash is paid for in there.

 

We had a realtor come to the house last night and it looks like we've got some work to do to get out of here in as good of shape as we can which will be difficult with DH working and going to school, but she's willing to work with us on timing too. On the one hand, I just want it done, but on the other, I don't know where to start with all that needs to happen!

Just one step at a time. Make a list of things to be done and go from there. Take advantage of the offer to move some things to the new place in order to stage yours better for selling.

[shawthorne44]

Just one step at a time. Make a list of things to be done and go from there. Take advantage of the offer to move some things to the new place in order to stage yours better for selling.

 

Absolutely!   OP, I would make a goal to move half of your stuff to the new place when/before you sell your current house.  

 

eta:  We moved a half hour away, and we kept DD's pediatrician.  Because we really liked her.  It hasn't been a problem.  

Edited August 30, 2016 by shawthorne44

[Scarlett]

Absolutely! OP, I would make a goal to move half of your stuff to the new place when/before you sell your current house.

 

eta: We moved a half hour away, and we kept DD's pediatrician. Because we really liked her. It hasn't been a problem.

Ha. We moved 2 hours away and I kept Ds's pediatrician and dentist for 3 years. After 4 years I am still going back for my gynecologist and my hair dresser.