How much do you spend on a birthday gift for a child's friend

[Janeway]

My daughter is going to a birthday party tomorrow morning. I had spent $30 on a few little things. One thing got destroyed so now the gift is only worth $20. Should I go back to the store to add another thing? I do have a logic puzzle thing here.. Castle Logix that I got at a home school convention. Would this be a good thing for a girl turning 5? http://www.smartgames.eu/en/smartgames/castle-logix Or does it seem too babyish? If I add that in, the gift will be worth more than $30.

[catz]

$20 is totally fine for a regular friend birthday party IMO.  Especially for a 5 year old.  I usually go for 12-20 for a friend birthday, not a special relationship.  For a special friend/someone closer I might go in the 20-30 range. 

[rebcoola]

 $20 max for that age group

[mommyoffive]

I was going to ask this same question.  

 

I think $20 is fine.  

 

If you want to add the puzzle you could.

 

 

Wondering how much others think you should spend on gifts.

 

 

What about if your 2 kids were invited to a party?  2 $20 gifts then?   

My other 2 were not invited but we are taking them since it is at a public pool.  We will pay for them to get in.  Buy our own food.   But they think they are invited so they want to bring a present too.  So now I guess we are bringing 4 presents. 

 

 

 

[mommyoffive]

 $20 max for that age group

 

Does it go up for the age?

[catz]

Oh gosh - I think one gift/family is totally fine.  Have each of the kids make a card if they want.  But I'm the party pooper that is not a fan of 8000 gift kid birthday parties.  LOL. 

[Janeway]

AND..the mom IS on my FB page and can see my a/c just broke! So maybe she will be thrilled to see $20 worth of presents now. LOL

[Junie]

I usually do $15-20 for birthday parties.

 

Also, I think the Castle thing is great if you would like to give that instead of whatever else you bought.  Dd6 has played with this game the past two weeks in speech therapy and I was thinking about putting it on her Christmas list.

[catz]

Does it go up for the age?

 

I don't think it has to.  I have a teen now and it can be a little more challenging to get something really desirable for an older tween/teen in the $10-15 range.  But for larger birthday parties for younger kids, I think bringing ONE smallish thing you think the child will enjoy is great.   Many kids start to lose it after opening about 5 anyway

 

[KrissiK]

I spend $15. Sometimes, if all my kids are invited I'll spend $20. I'm sorry, but I'm on a budget.

[Spryte]

I think $20 is great. Sometimes we go to $30, not always.

 

And we love Castle Logix! My 5 yr old adores it, as did DS back then.

[mamiof5]

We try to keep it around $15

[bettyandbob]

$15-20 here. 

[umsami]

We usually give a $15 or $20 Target gift card and one of those $1 box of candies (kind of like the movie theater candy boxes).  This has been our go-to gift for birthdays for years.  Seems to be well liked. 

 

For a best friend, we'd probably go a little higher, but not necessarily. 

[Rachel]

We aim for $15, sometimes $20 if it is a closer friend. If both kids are invited we still only take one present.

[luuknam]

For 5yos, my preference is $8-$15, no more. I once did more because the kid came to my son's birthday party a few days earlier and gave 4(!) presents that definitely added up to more than that, but ugh. $30 is total overkill. I *might* make another exception if I know the family is poor, but even then you've got the problem you don't want to outspend the parents.

[Caclcoca]

We try to go under $15 unless it is a close friend.  We will spend a little more for them.  How much depends on what our expenses are at the time.

 

[Arcadia]

Does it go up for the age?

We do $20 for all ages but more for close friends and relatives.

[Rebel Yell]

Not much more than $20 in value, but often shopped for on sale and spent around $10

 

And cards? ZERO. I fold an index card in half, have child decorate or just use a happy birthday stamp, sign the inside, then hole-punch and attach to gift tie ribbon.

[Tap]

I spend less for the under 10yo crowd, if I know the kid is getting a bunch of things at the birthday party, then I will spend no more than $20, but if I got something decent for $10, I would be ok with that too. For the younger kids, it just seems to get tossed in a pile anyways so no one really seems to care what is nice and possibly expensive, vs what came from the Target markdown bin. 

 

For the 13 and up, it really depends on how well we know the person and what social group they are from.  That may sound really, really bad, but it is honest.  I spent more on dd's friends who  she went to private school with vs our neighborhood friends,  because otherwise her present would look really cheap in comparison to the other kids gifts. We are not rich, and had scholarships in private school.  Our neighborhood is not expensive and the families here are not rich.  Many of her private school friends are very, very rich.  Still, I draw the line at $30. 

 

From 10 to 13yo, it was a mix of the two, depending on the maturity of the person and the family.

 

For a true BFF, I may go higher, but it would have to be a long term friendship for me to do so. 

Edited August 5, 2016 by Tap

[LucyStoner]

$10ish when the kids are young and it's not a close friend (like the mass invites that might go out to a whole class, team or scout group.). That's just because we get a lot of those for my younger son and have to economize somewhat.

 

$20ish for a child who is a close friend of my child. Usually a bit more for the child of a close family friend or a cousin.

 

For my 13 year olds best friend, I give my son $20 and he is free to add to that from his own money. He usually spends $20-30 of his own money so it's around $40-50. That's one child though, who is his first close friend and they are like brothers.

 

I think $20 is fine and you don't need to go out to add something in.

Edited August 5, 2016 by LucyStoner

[LucyStoner]

Does it go up for the age?

For my son it has but he only has 1 super close friend and a couple of other MTG buddies. He's 13. He's given his best friend everything from an elaborate Percy Jackson sword he made himself

to a $50 book they both coveted. My younger son is only 7 and his friends are excited about markers, little science kits, plastic army guys and silly putty. Way cheaper/less time intensive.

Edited August 5, 2016 by LucyStoner

[gardenmom5]

how much someone spends should be based upon their income and their own expenses.  there is no one size fits all, and there should be no expectation of how much someone will spend on a gift. 

 

if you're happy with what you have purchased - that's all that is required.  if you feel you should do more - and can afford to do more - that's fine too.

[heartlikealion]

I like to make it look like I spent $15-20 though I may have spent less because sales/coupons. Really a nice gift for that age could probably cost even less. If I wanted to add to it, I would add an inexpensive accessory.

 

Multiple kids attending party --- no, do not feel obligated to being four gifts. Oh my. One nice gift, sure. Call it done lol maybe spend more than $20 but eh there's wiggle room.

[craftymama]

If at all possible we make a gift in the younger years.  I'd be perfectly happy to continue handmade forever, but I'm also realistic about this not going over well for all.  I do not go over $20 except for very special friends who have been around for awhile.  Kids make their own cards.  

[rebcoola]

I will spend more for a teen milestone birthday.  We bring one gift from the family no matter how many kids are invited and so does everyone we know.

[Joshin]

I feel like I live in a different world, lol! Gifts within our tribe are more in the $5-10 range regardless of age. Handmade gifts or second hand gifts also aren't unheard of. Around the age of 10 or 11, the kids become responsible for buying gifts themselves for their friends. We have a party for a 9 year old coming up and my son is making a tile game (Micropul) from free printables online and supplies we have on hand. We'll combine it with some food items for a game night gift basket - cost about $5. For kids we don't know well we give books -- usually activity type books such as those from Klutz, that we pick up in major sales or in like new condition secondhand. A $30 gift is about our budget for one of our own kids' birthdays (unless it's a special gift year, like the time younger got a telescope or elder got a laptop).

[jeremmy]

We usually shoot for $30, but if something broke I wouldn't feel obligated to buy something else to increase the value. I don't spend more for the whole family being invited. Once they are teens I will expect my kids to pay for their own gifts. I remember being a teen and spending $30-50 on my friends gifts.

Edited August 5, 2016 by jeremmy

[rmtzc2009]

Does it go up for the age?

Yep! At least in my area. My kids are the lowest gift givers amongst the kids at birthday parties. I do $35-40 gift and often other kids are giving 50-75 cash. I can't bring myself to join that club. My boys are only 10&12. I thought spending $40 was a lot!

[MysteryJen]

$10 to $15 and only for actual friends. Otherwise, we would be spending a fortune for teammates, etc.

[Ausmumof3]

For 5yos, my preference is $8-$15, no more. I once did more because the kid came to my son's birthday party a few days earlier and gave 4(!) presents that definitely added up to more than that, but ugh. $30 is total overkill. I *might* make another exception if I know the family is poor, but even then you've got the problem you don't want to outspend the parents.

Also you can create the feeling that they need to reciprocate on kind which can be really awkward.

[mommyoffive]

Yep! At least in my area. My kids are the lowest gift givers amongst the kids at birthday parties. I do $35-40 gift and often other kids are giving 50-75 cash. I can't bring myself to join that club. My boys are only 10&12. I thought spending $40 was a lot!

 

Holy Cow!

[Garga]

$10 until they turn 11.  Then it bumps up to $15 until they turn 16.  Then I don't know.  I'll decide when that time comes.  I guess $20, but I kind of think my sons will decide for themselves out of their own money.  That's what I did, but I had a job.  So it all depends on whether or not they have jobs.  If not, I'll give them $20 for their friend if they want me to.

 

I don't expect more than that from anyone else.  Oh, and once they turn 10, it's always cash in a card.  We don't try to figure out what item the kid will want past 9.

 

ETA:  Dollar store card.  No stinkin' $4.99 card for a $15 gift.  That's just silly.  It can also be a homemade card, if the boys want to.  Sometimes they like doing that because they can make something funny.

Edited August 6, 2016 by Garga

[kroe1]

We spend $100 to $150 per kid. DD is with these kids 20 hours a week. If it was a casual friendship, probably less would be spent.

[SparklyUnicorn]

The castle block thing seems rather babyish.

 

I don't have a set amount, but I think what you have is fine. 

[alisoncooks]

Birthday presents for casual friends are likely to come in around $10. Actually, amongst our circle of close friends, invitations often say "no presents, please" and we make a card...

[QueenCat]

Mine are older now but when they were elementary age, around $10 for a casual friend, $20 for a close friend.

[Sk8ermaiden]

$20-25 on a casual friend and $30 on a close friend. 

 

We give one gift when both kids are invited, this seems to be normal among our friends. I sometimes spend a little more on it, but not always. 

[Dmmetler]

I let DD pick it what seems appropriate. Sometimes it's more, sometimes less.

[sewingmama]

Well only one of my kids has ever been invited to one birthday party lol...so we dodged that bullet. People mostly do family parties here I guess. We spent $15 which was a lot considering this family has been invited to my DDs birthday twice and either make something or get something from the thrift store. (not that it matters).

 

I would only spend more on nephews and nieces but we don't have any that live close...so we don't 😉

Edited August 6, 2016 by sewingmama

[poppy]

Castle Logic isn't too babyish for a just-turned-5.  It is a puzzle game probably best for ages 5-7.

 

ETA- Sorry, I was thinking it was Camelot Jr (the one I have).  Still, i think it'd be fine.

Edited August 7, 2016 by poppy

[MistyMountain]

I spend around $10.

[IfIOnly]

Birthday presents for casual friends are likely to come in around $10. Actually, amongst our circle of close friends, invitations often say "no presents, please" and we make a card...

Almost all of our close friends have no gift bdays. My son just got the neatest homemade cards for his birthday recently. So creative.

 

I do $10ish otherwise. Lots of neat things in that price range I've discovered.

[kiwik]

I was going to ask this same question.

 

I think $20 is fine.

 

If you want to add the puzzle you could.

 

 

Wondering how much others think you should spend on gifts.

 

 

What about if your 2 kids were invited to a party? 2 $20 gifts then?

My other 2 were not invited but we are taking them since it is at a public pool. We will pay for them to get in. Buy our own food. But they think they are invited so they want to bring a present too. So now I guess we are bringing 4 presents.

With two kids they take one present between them in our group but make a card each. Sometimes I split the gift in two. I aim for about $10 to $15 (NZ) but if I find something I know a particular child would love I am a bit flexible. I don't hang out with well off people though.