lollie010 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Can we talk about the use of home air fresheners? Is my family just sensitive? We are visiting my in-laws. They are lovely people, but seriously we may have to start coming only for brief visits, which will be hard since it's a three hour drive. I am not exaggerating--there is an air freshener in almost every outlet. AND each room, even the pantry, has at least one of those air fresheners that has a motion sensor so it sprays each time someone walks by. A walk from the living room to the bedroom will get you "misted" no less than five times. My children are afraid of the hissing sound that is made anytime they enter a room. We have been walking around like Ninjas in the night trying to go from room to room undetected. My head hurts, my throat hurts, I can taste the stuff and I feel like barfing. We are all sick, except my husband who seems undisturbed. I just took them all and hid them in a closet. Tomorrow morning I guess I will put them back out. Are we just especially sensitive? Or is this "fresh air" over the top? 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I'm allergic to them. I'm also allergic to Febreze. It would drive me batty and make me physically ill to have so many around. 15 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Peregrine Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Gross. And I hate those things. I would not be able to stand it. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MiMi 4under3 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 :lol: and :grouphug: No, you are not overly sensitive. This is over the top IMO. I don't like artificial air fresheners. I'll open a window to let fresh air in - even in below zero temperatures in winter. Rarely, I'll use citrus or lavender essential oil spray, or a very mild candle. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sewingmama Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Oh those things trigger my asthma terribly...I would never be able to visit. It sounds a little overboard...are they trying to cover the smell of something sinister J/K You lose your sense of smell as you get older...maybe they need that many to be able to smell it. Either way I would ask for them to be turned off when we visited. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I would just tell you ILs that you are so sorry, that they smell nice, but it seems that you are having a reaction to them and ask if it would be okay to have them put away while you are there. 15 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 It's misery. I feel like I should clean out my sinuses when I get home. My MIL is not the type to sympathize and just remove them. My little guy has asthma and I'm worried about him. He's also peanut allergic and there are huge cans of peanuts sitting out everywhere. Hoping we make it through the night. :) lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I'd be physically sick. And I'm not typically allergic and can handle a lot of scents, even if I might not like them. But this? Sounds horrible. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I'd move a child with asthma. No way would we stay the night; it's too risky. :( We'd be on our way home or to a hotel if home is too far - my youngest has asthma. OMG. I just re-read your last post about the cans of peanuts. Get out of there! 29 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Insertcreativenamehere Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 We can't tolerate those either. They cause allergy and asthma symptoms for us and I stay far, far away from artificial fragrances! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LifeLovePassion Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I'd move a child with asthma. No way would we stay the night; it's too risky. :( We'd be on our way home or to a hotel if home is too far - my youngest has asthma. OMG. I just re-read your last post about the cans of peanuts. Get out of there! Me too. I wouldn't risk it. Goodness, it was stressful enough for me having dd's peanut allergic friend over for a play date where I had cleaned and hid all nut products. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalypso Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 The air fresherners would make my family ill, too. But, the peanuts, I would get out of there. Make her put them away or leave. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 I'd move a child with asthma. No way would we stay the night; it's too risky. :( We'd be on our way home or to a hotel if home is too far - my youngest has asthma. OMG. I just re-read your last post about the cans of peanuts. Get out of there! I would purposely expose myself to the flu if it would get me and my kiddos out of this trip. :( I try a new excuse every time and then end up feeling guilty. I should go back and look at my old posts. I bet I've posted something similar from this guest room before. Lol. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 Sorry double post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elinnea Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 No, you're not sensitive, I hate air fresheners with a passion. No need for so many either unless there's a body in the basement. In which case, I advise you to leave NOW. :tongue_smilie: 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 No, you're not sensitive, I hate air fresheners with a passion. No need for so many either unless there's a body in the basement. In which case, I advise you to leave NOW. :tongue_smilie: Now you have me wondering. Lol. We will have to do something out of the house tomorrow and then cut our trip short. Regrettably, that will be easier than asking her to remove the dangers. :( Crazy...I know. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I would just tell you ILs that you are so sorry, that they smell nice, but it seems that you are having a reaction to them and ask if it would be okay to have them put away while you are there. :iagree: I couldn't stand them, either! :ack2: 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 It's misery. I feel like I should clean out my sinuses when I get home. My MIL is not the type to sympathize and just remove them. My little guy has asthma and I'm worried about him. He's also peanut allergic and there are huge cans of peanuts sitting out everywhere. Hoping we make it through the night. :) lol Why doesn't your dh sit his mother down for a serious talk? This isn't about simple discomfort. This is about a potentially life-threatening situation for your child. Tell your dh to man up and tell his mother the air fresheners and peanuts have to go, or else you will be leaving immediately. 26 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Stinky air freshener? Annoying under normal circumstances. Air freshener causing reactions in asthmatic child? Way past annoying into dangerous. The child's breathing should be paramount. Large cans of things that can kill a child sitting out? Uh, no. I can't understand any reason for leaving a child in a deliberately dangerous environment. It's really not a "lol" situation. (Did I misread that?) 18 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2samlibby Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I can't stand them either. They trigger migraines for me. I'd be sick too with many in the house. Ick! All those chemicals! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I'm sorry. It sounds miserable. If your MIL is not willing to accommodate your family's allergies and sensitivities, you may have to consider limiting how long you stay during your visits. My family is also three hours away, and we have done day trips. We just get an early start in order to arrive late morning and then leave in the early evening. We do get home late (10 pm if we start driving after supper), which is not great, but doable every once in awhile. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammi K Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 My daughter has them in her room. I insist that she keep the door closed. Yuck! I've tried to convince her that her frequent migraines might be cause by breathing large doses of petrochemicals. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arctic Bunny Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Yuck, it seems like everybody has something stinky plugged in or diffusing or melting these days. Fortunately, my mil has hers in the hall and I have to unplug it to plug in the nightlight so the kids don't fall down the stairs... Oops! I do have to laugh when people come in and say how good our house smells. And after all these years of dh wanting to buy febreeze and me saying if it's clean, it doesn't smell anyway... I think he's finally caught on. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Augh, I'd go nuts. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reefgazer Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Oh, God, I hate those things. I'd rather smell 3 day old broccoli. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 What does the MIL say when you ask her to remove the air fresheners? It must be bazaar to watch a grown woman dig in her heels over this. My air fresheners of choice is a crockpot with some citrus and herbs. Or bread baking :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 the thing is - they don't actually "freshen" the air - they perfume it. I like opening windows to actually "freshen" the air. (even if its only for a short time during the day.) bring the outside in - of course, there are times of year it's just not practical. My mother had asthma and COPD. she had no tolerance for any of this stuff. (if it was bad, she sounded like she was going to cough up a lung.) I couldn't even light candles at Christmas. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 It's misery. I feel like I should clean out my sinuses when I get home. My MIL is not the type to sympathize and just remove them. My little guy has asthma and I'm worried about him. He's also peanut allergic and there are huge cans of peanuts sitting out everywhere. Hoping we make it through the night. :) lol fyi: most of those use peanut oil. We found this out when a friend's DD with a very severe peanut allergy had a reaction to one. It is often not listed because it is not a food item. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matryoshka Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I have no allergies, I have no asthma, but I hate those things! :ack2: I also have no need for perfume, either. Don't care for incense, nor smelly candles. Just really don't like added smells. My lilac tree in the spring, now, that smells lovely. The Christmas tree when we first bring it in, ditto. Please don't try to bottle them and spray it on things. :glare: 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan C. Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Ha! I can't tolerate moderate to too much perfume (I actually taste it), and even dryer sheets smell on bed sheets (I will sneeze... a lot). Add gluten free and dairy free, no one will want me. Those perfume sprayers.... would..... somehow just disappear. So would the peanuts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 fyi: most of those use peanut oil. We found this out when a friend's DD with a very severe peanut allergy had a reaction to one. It is often not listed because it is not a food item. S C Johnson (who makes the Glade products) specifically says that they do not use peanut or tree nut ingredients. http://www.whatsinsidescjohnson.com/en-us/faq.aspx 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thewaka Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Just walking past air "fresheners" in their packaging in a store usually triggers my asthma, can't imagine I'd be anywhere but the ER after a few minutes in that house. But the peanuts left out? The combo is seriously life threatening. Maybe she doesn't understand and never will, but surely your husband does? Glad you can cut the trip short. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ausmumof3 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I hate those things... Yuck Why do I want to breathe in some chemical cocktail? If the air smells stale open the windows or cut a lemon or something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 You can make 6 hours round trip a day trip and really you have to. My ds had a doctor that was a 3.5 hour drive. We'd get up and leave the house no layer than 6 am. Our appointments were always no later than 10 am. Then, we'd go to fast food place with a indoor playground or visit a friend who lived near if she was available. Then, I'd fill the gas tank again, buy diet coke and get on the rode home. We saw the doctor every few months to once a year. Anyway, I'd make the ILs a day trip. Leave your home early am. Have brunch with them. Do something physical with the kids and them, like walk to a nearby playground or park. Then, pack up and go home. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 3 hours each way is absolutely a day trip distance. Any air polluter ( freshener) are absolutely awful and should be banned Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I agree with Betty -- if you can't get the IL's to remove the air fresheners and peanuts, then make visiting them a day trip. A six hour round trip isn't very much. I don't mind some wax melts and some candles. All sprays are overwhelming to me. My DH and the boys say they can't smell, or can barely smell, 98 percent of the things that are overpowering to me. So smelling ability really does vary a LOT between people. Chances are your ILs don't even notice. But the peanuts? There's absolutely no excuse for that. None. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwik Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I can't imagine making a 6 hour round trip in a day. But then the petrol cost alone would use up 3 weeks fuel budget and I and ds7 get car sick. But I can't imagine putting up with that either - headaches, asthma, nausea, yuk. I would at the least remove and encase any devices in the bedrooms and then open the windows. That gives you somewhere safe. And since there are peanuts around you and your son may need to spend a lot of time reading in your room while your husband deals with his mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyofsixreboot Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Tell them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I missed about asthma and allergies when I read the OP. OP, Why are you allowing this to keep happening? I can't imagine a situation where an adult can't talk to another adult about asthma and allergy triggers. If the other adult is that unstable and irrational that such a conversation will cause more than maybe annoyance (shouldn't be even that, but I'd allow some annoyance, it is an older person, after all), you shouldn't be in that house period. And your DH should get his head out of his...What a bizarre situation and sorry to say you are contributing to it by being so passive about the health of your children. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Why doesn't your dh sit his mother down for a serious talk? This isn't about simple discomfort. This is about a potentially life-threatening situation for your child. Tell your dh to man up and tell his mother the air fresheners and peanuts have to go, or else you will be leaving immediately. I haven't read past this post yet, so maybe someone's said this and I don't know it yet, but... yeah, this! Your husband needs to find another place to stay and tell his mother why. Even if she takes away all the air fresheners immediately, the smell isn't going away. It's permeated the furniture, carpets, any draperies... You're going to have to wash all your clothing, perhaps multiple times, when you get home, too. Get out of there. I'd go even if the allergies weren't life-threatening. Some of my family has allergies too. Not as serious as yours, it seems - nothing life-threatening, but severe discomfort (headaches, sinus problems, etc.) would be enough for us. We would not stay in that house. ETA: The peanuts - just pick up the containers and put them in an inaccessible (to your kid) place. Tell your MIL and your husband where you put them, and why. If they bring them back out and leave them down, ask them why they want to kill your kid. Actually your husband should be the one to do this. But, just get the peanuts out of sight. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Those things trigger my asthma as do candles, wood burning, air pollution, etc. But on top of that, if somehow my asthma holds off for a while, I am sure to get a migraine. OP, don;t bring your children there anymore if they are unwilling to bend about this. Meet them somewhere else your poor allergic, asthmatic child can breathe and be safe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I would just tell you ILs that you are so sorry, that they smell nice, but it seems that you are having a reaction to them and ask if it would be okay to have them put away while you are there. Exactly. Seems a better solution than not visiting. Just say you love the smell, but you seem to have a reaction to them. I love the smell of some air freshener things (it's a guilty pleasure, don't tell the hippie police!). I use wax melts several times a week to scent the air, or candles, and even like a few of those plug in ones, but dear lord, not all at once!!! And one in my 1500 sq ft house is plenty. so as someone not normally sensitive to those things, who likes to sniff the fabric softener and dryer sheets in the grocery store, etc...I still say they are way way way overboard. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Yuck, it seems like everybody has something stinky plugged in or diffusing or melting these days. Fortunately, my mil has hers in the hall and I have to unplug it to plug in the nightlight so the kids don't fall down the stairs... Oops! I do have to laugh when people come in and say how good our house smells. And after all these years of dh wanting to buy febreeze and me saying if it's clean, it doesn't smell anyway... I think he's finally caught on. Very true. a lesson I learned when working in veterinary clinics. If it's clean, you don't need air freshener. Now, that said, I do LIKE the smell of some scented candles, etc, but the idea is to add a small amount of scent that I like to set the mood, not cover anything up. and again, small. Like it takes you a while to notice it. I'll plug in a wax warmer for 30 minutes once or twice a day, some days, just for fun. But that's it. And that's one, in the whole house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jelbe5 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I have asthma and can't be around those products. Does your MIL understand the seriousness of asthma? When I was growing up many of my relatives and even teachers believed it was "all in my head" and I was "putting on an act" when I could not breath. I had adults actually tell me this when I was having an attack. I bet your MIL is one of these individuals. I agree with others. Time for your dh to educate his mom and modify your visits. This is not worth the risk or a trip to the ER! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 That does not sound pleasant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 We made it through the night. I took all of the fresheners from this end of the house and removed them. We are the only people who ever come into this area of the house, so I'll just replace them when we leave. I opened the window and turned on the ceiling fan. We will have breakfast, head outside for the day and cut our trip short. DH is amazing dealing with his mother, who is in the beginning stages of Alzheimer's. If he asked her to remove them, she would, begrudgedly, but then would go out and replace them, not remembering why they were gone in the first place. It's a complicated situation. We would love to visit more and will probably work it out for DH to come by himself if he intends to spend the night and we will come for day trips when the weather is nice enough to go outside. The health of my children is of primary importance to me. And even though I threw in some LOLs in previous posts, I meant that more in a nervous, anxious, "what am I going to do to get out of here" kind of way. Not in a "this is knee slapping funny" kind of way. I always laugh when I'm nervous. :) Thanks for the input. Fragrances have always caused me to panic, because I know it will be an instant headache. I hate to see that my children seem to be taking after me in that regard. 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Never mind. I just read your update. Glad you found a solution. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Gkad to see you got some fresh air and sleep last night, and that you are cutting the visit short. Those vile air fresheners trigger my asthma like there's no tomorrow! :zombie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisbeth Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Why doesn't your dh sit his mother down for a serious talk? This isn't about simple discomfort. This is about a potentially life-threatening situation for your child. Tell your dh to man up and tell his mother the air fresheners and peanuts have to go, or else you will be leaving immediately. This! The safety of this child comes first. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisbeth Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I can only imagine the amount of peanut residue in that house. Good choice to leave. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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