Home'scool Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 (edited) I am due to leave this Thursday on vacation. On paper it is wonderful: it is with my sister and we travel very well together. We are spending 4 days at DisneyWorld and 4 days at Universal. We have done this trip before and love it. We have books and magazines and knitting projects for down time. We always take is slow and go at our own pace. I am practically jumping out of my skin today. Last night I got barely any sleep. It is more than just anxiety .... it has moved into panic attacks (the hot flush, pinpricks all over, shallow breathing). My sister is very supportive and struggles with her own anxiety so she would understand if we cancelled. Plus I paid for the trip so she would not be out any money. I am not really afraid of flying. I don't love it but I will do it. I don't really have any concrete reason that is making me panicked, just a generalized panic. So then I start thinking if I just stayed home I could rest and relax and do the things I'm comfortable with. I know it's a cop-out, but I feel like pulling the plug on the vacation and making it a stay-cation would stop the panic. I haven't had a vacation all year and it would be nice to just relax at home. It might just make it worse to deal with the next time though. And I don't know if I would get any refund. I do have travel insurance but I don't know if I could get my doctor to provide anxiety as an excuse, although he does treat me for that. It could be PTSD from coming off of 4 years of divorce, or it could be a side-symptom of menopause, which I just started entering. Any been-there-done-that? Ugh I just need the panic to go away it is ruining everything! Ladies, please help me. You always do 😞 Edited September 30, 2019 by Home'scool 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 Please don't cancel. Breathe. Go for a walk. Distract yourself. Make a to do list. Catch up on laundry. Talk to someone. Not only will you possibly regret it afterwards. You will very deeply disappoint someone else. I can't imagine being excited for a trip like this and have someone bail on me this close to the event. Let her know how you're feeling and maybe you want a little extra downtime during the trip and maybe a little extra relaxed. You obviously thought this was a good idea at some point. If you need a staycation at some point that's great. Plan that intentionally. I have anxiety at times though it is much better controlled now than it used to be. I remind myself anticipation of something is always far worse than it actually is. I always get twitchy getting ready for travel and always wonder if it's worth it. It always is. 20 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted September 30, 2019 Author Share Posted September 30, 2019 (edited) I just edited my post to say that my sister is very understanding and also suffers from anxiety so she gets it. She has said that if I want to cancel she will understand. Quote I remind myself anticipation of something is always far worse than it actually is. I always get twitchy getting ready for travel and always wonder if it's worth it. It always is. You are right, it usually always is. This level of panic attacks is just so HIGH. Last time I was experiencing this level was when my XH said he wanted a divorce. Edited September 30, 2019 by Home'scool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 1 minute ago, Home'scool said: I just edited my post to say that my sister is very understanding and also suffers from anxiety so she gets it. She has said that if I want to cancel she will understand. That's very nice of her but I'm sure at some level she will still be very disappointed. Even financially it is going to be a hit in one way or another. Ask yourself if in 10 years if you're still avoiding life because of anxiety if you'll be happy with your life. If you will be, that's a fair choice. But I think this could be extremely life limiting. And I say that as someone who has been treated for anxiety. Are you getting treatment? 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 You really “should” go. It’s not good to avoid things with anxiety. It can make anxiety worse. I can see why you would be anxious from it being new, marking a transition, etc, because it is those things. I think those are reasons you might be anxious if no other reason is jumping out at you. It is good to do things for yourself 🙂 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I had this happen once. I sat quietly for a few minutes and thought about whether it was anxiety or intuition. I decided it was anxiety and went anyway, and was very glad I did. Ask yourself if it's anxiety or intuition. If you're sure it's intuition cancel the trip and don't feel bad about it. If you're sure it's anxiety I would recommend actively making the decision to not let anxiety control your life. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 Your sister is being nice. I am glad. It’s not a sufficient reason to justify not going. I think it’s appropriate for her though because it does relieve you of additional anxiety as far as knowing she won’t be upset with you. It is very gracious and kind of her. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Selkie Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 As a lifelong anxiety sufferer, I would push myself to go. Once you start limiting yourself because of anxiety, your world gets smaller and smaller. 15 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 (edited) I always have anxiety before trips, so your anxiety sounds pretty normal to me. I would just tell yourself to go. Once I get there, usually within a couple days it's gone. So to me, I wouldn't let the anxiety stop you. You're likely to feel better when you get there. And nuts, if you don't, I'm pretty sure hanging in a hot tub in Orlando is medicinal. Edited September 30, 2019 by PeterPan 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I don’t know if it’s helpful to look at “cons.” Would you ask your sister again in the future if you cancel this time? That would be pretty awkward. This could be a really nice tradition for the two of you to do every so often. Also, this time you do have your sister. You aren’t going alone. In the future, you might need (or want) to travel alone to visit one of your kids. This is a good opportunity. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeachGal Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 There aren't a lot of studies about this, but for some, too little zinc and too much copper can cause anxiety. The imbalance can be worse around perimenopause/menopause because of changes in hormones. One of my kids tends to be anxious and occasionally wakes at night feeling anxious so he started taking 15 mg of zinc piccolinate and B6. We'll see if it helps. If you were to give it a try, keep in mind that as copper is removed it can cause worsening symptoms for a period of time. This study shows that zinc supplementation improved symptoms but didn't lower levels of copper. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3738454/ If you want to read more, William Walsh has studied the biochemistry of inmates and others with mental disorders and has written about it. He used to work at Argonne. He's written a book and discusses copper and zinc and how it can affect neurotransmitters, etc. I'm going to order it soon to see what else he has to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted September 30, 2019 Author Share Posted September 30, 2019 Quote I think it’s appropriate for her though because it does relieve you of additional anxiety as far as knowing she won’t be upset with you. It is very gracious and kind of her. My sister is extremely gracious and kind to me. I am so lucky to have her to live with since my divorce. She always says that we are in this together. She also suffers from anxiety so I know she would understand but I also know she would be disappointed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I have not cancelled a big trip but I have cancelled small plans due to anxiety. Honestly, I think when I went to France last year, if dd had not been in France waiting for me, there is a high chance I would have cancelled, but I am SOOO GLAD I didn’t! Even while *in* France, I had one day when I was almost overwhelmed with anxiety and I almost stayed in the apartment all day, but dd pretty much begged me not to waste the day; “You didn’t come to France to sit in the apartment!” I recommend that you do not cancel this trip. If your doctor will permit it, ask for a few Xanax or such to take the edge off, (although of course not during a time you are driving or such). 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted September 30, 2019 Author Share Posted September 30, 2019 Ugh I guess I just needed words of encouragement. I was thinking about this issue this morning .... If I had a broken foot I would yell "OW" and people would bring me to a place to have the pain fixed (a hospital) and then they would secure the pain (in a cast) and then I would be allowed to rest and recover until my pain subsided. I would never be expected to show up to work and not limp. Anxiety and panic are different. There is no straightforward fix. There is no cast to put around it. Society doesn't really support resting and recovering from anxiety. You still have to go to work everyday. It's all up to how I deal with it ... deep breathing, mediation, rest, eating well, etc. I am going to counseling. But it is just so hard. When I feel it coming on I feel so out of control. And then, of course, I panic about having panic attacks. And round and round it goes. I just want to yell "HELP" at the top of my lungs because the feeling is so awful and the mind is spinning so hard. But you can't. You have to look inward and try to draw from strength that is severely missing at that moment. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbutton Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I have some situational anxiety that I can almost always pinpoint to a cause. Often the cause is that something is really going on, and I am the ONLY ONE who gives a rat's bottom end. I also have had hot flashes that are definitely hormonal that trigger the kinds of things you are describing--when I found out that's a thing, just knowing that was the problem was a HUGE help. Having a plan to cope with the hot flashes--usually getting along for a moment, getting cool, drinking some water, etc. was what I needed. It didn't fix everything, but the rest I just had to cope with, like potentially being embarrassed that my body was flaking out, getting over that, and removing myself from the situation. (I seem to be past that, yay! Hopefully you will be there sooner than later if there is a hormonal component going on with you!) The only time I've considered cancelling a trip is when I have a logical reason to be anxious (there is a problem or a potential problem not being addressed), or I had a physical problem, like a sprained foot. That means I have threatened cancelling trips over food issues. I have major allergy-related problems with eating, especially eating out, and it's a total pain. If I am travelling and have no plan because people are downplaying my issues, stonewalling me for answers, or the answers are inadequate and that's not being acknowledged, then I don't have much recourse other than to threaten to pull the plug--then other people finally take me seriously and act. Or, I have researched options, and then keep finding out they won't work. I cannot go without an eating plan--it's just not possible. But, I've never had to actually cancel--the hive has had suggestions, or I have thrown the appropriate fit at home to get my DH to start problem-solving with me, etc. (Yes, we get counseling to deal with the whole dynamic of needs and not addressing them.) If you are just anxious in a general way, I think going with your sister and dealing with it together is good preparation for the future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 If your doctor is already treating you for anxiety, I would request medication for breakthrough anxiety and panic attacks. We deal with dx'd anxiety disorder in my family. I would try to push through, but I would not hesitate to ask for medication. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 (edited) 11 minutes ago, Home'scool said: Ugh I guess I just needed words of encouragement. I was thinking about this issue this morning .... If I had a broken foot I would yell "OW" and people would bring me to a place to have the pain fixed (a hospital) and then they would secure the pain (in a cast) and then I would be allowed to rest and recover until my pain subsided. I would never be expected to show up to work and not limp. That is definitely not true at all jobs! For many people, it's no work, no pay. I went to work on crutches in my younger days, at a very active job. Anxiety and panic are indeed different, and there are different medications to help with each. If you're already being treated for anxiety by a doctor, plus seeing a counselor, I can't imagine you would have much trouble getting breakthrough medication for the short term. Sometimes you need something to keep your neurons from continually misfiring so you can calm down. I am in favor of resting and recovering at times. Because your mind is already spinning, and this is a vacation you would generally look forward to, my worry would be that lots of time and inactivity would simply make things worse (plus the added stress of probably losing money and so on). Edited September 30, 2019 by katilac 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 16 minutes ago, Home'scool said: If I had a broken foot I would yell "OW" If you had a broken foot, you would rent a scooter and go anyway. 18 minutes ago, Home'scool said: Society doesn't really support resting and recovering from anxiety. I'm not sure you rest to recover from anxiety. It's chemistry and you correct the chemistry. It can turn on a dime as you change the chemistry. I don't know. I have to talk pretty straight to myself and tell myself it's chemistry and to go do it anyway. Remember, it's your vacation. You could get there and choose not to use the tix. You could just sit in the hotel and rest, all that rest you're wanting. Or you could do only Disney and sell your Universal tix. It's a GREAT time to be doing Disney right now. That way you could spread your tix out and have more rest days. Did you hear about the new gondolas opening? Skyliner Gondola Review: Disney World's Most Magical Flight ...https://www.disneytouristblog.com › review-skyliner-gondolas-disney-world You could spend a day riding the gondolas and stopping to eat at resorts, haha, and not even go into the parks! If you want rest, you can rest there, sure. But going gives you the choice. And who knows. Disney is pretty magical. You might get in there and some of that chemistry improves and you feel it. It could be the magic you need. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 1 hour ago, Selkie said: As a lifelong anxiety sufferer, I would push myself to go. Once you start limiting yourself because of anxiety, your world gets smaller and smaller. Ita! We did once skip a trip to a favorite destination due to anxiety and we've never gone back...because of anxiety. Ime, it is better to go despite the panic than limit your future. Do look into breakthrough meds. Also, to do this with your sister is something special. (hugs) 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted September 30, 2019 Author Share Posted September 30, 2019 I do have a prescription for Lorazepam that my doctor prescribed me. I am always so hesitant to use it because my mother was an alcoholic and prescription drug abuser so I always associated it with doing something the wrong way or taking the easy way out instead of coping. But in looking into it it says to use for short term panic attacks. So i am going to stop white knuckling it and take a damn pill once a day until I get there. Then I am sure most of the anxiety will pass. And if not, I will have it there with me. I can see how easily my life can become smaller and smaller. I am already a homebody. I'd rather be home than almost anywhere else. I love having my family around but am not good with going out socializing. When I think back to my youth I was such an extrovert! I loved challenges, adventures, meeting people! Now? I am so an introvert. But that's okay as long as I don't have it end up running my life. Thank you ladies. If you haven't realized it yet, I use this board to find good information but to also lean on and get advice from you all. It is so helpful. When I was at my desk this morning having a panic attack I knew if I posted and put some of my thoughts and anxiety on the page you would come back with words that help. I find that truly invaluable. 17 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pen Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I would try first to do it and get past the anxiety with meditation, breathing exercises, supplements, etc so that as much as possible I would be learning that I have the ability to get over the anxiety without giving in to it and without even needing to rely on a medication if possible. (Maybe just having the medication available in case of need would be a help itself not to be panicking that one will have a panic attack.) Though I might try actually taking the medication if necessary. If I then found I didn’t enjoy the trip, then I might go for a stay cation the next time. I am not currently dealing with vacation related anxiety, but am having lots of anxiety around being a passenger as my teen Ds is a beginning Driver. It gets less with familiar things. But then increases with new places, new levels of difficulty, new weather conditions... and is possibly similar in feeling to anxiety about flying (although crash rates for teen boys are higher than for commercial air flights). I am continuing to find Inositol and NAC supplements helpful. B vitamins for me. Maybe fish oil. Vitamin D. Magnesium. Zinc if not too much helps (I get easily nauseated from zinc, so for me it can only be a very little bit). Someone on WTM told me low iron can be related to feeling motion sick, and I tried supplement of a little iron too and think it does help— I think queasy from anxiety and queasy from motion sick can be similar feelings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stephanier.1765 Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I've traveled more in this last year than I ever have in my life. Starting the day before butterflies start losing their minds in my belly. By the morning of my trip I'm nauseous. But by the time I'm through security, I feel fine. It starts up again when it's time to head home. And again, once I'm through security I'm okay. I try to remember that whenever the anxiety sets in. It doesn't calm it but I do know I can get through it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 2 hours ago, PeterPan said: If you had a broken foot, you would rent a scooter and go anyway. Yep! My sister went to the Caribbean on a knee scooter, lol. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terabith Posted September 30, 2019 Share Posted September 30, 2019 I have pretty severe anxiety and depression. It really sucks. Breathing exercises (tongue behind top teeth, inhale through nose through a count of four, hold for a count of seven, breathe out through your mouth for a count of eight), mindfulness activities (five things you see, four things you feel, three things you hear, two things you smell, one thing you taste or colors that start with every letter of alphabet, etc) help. Breakthrough meds definitely help and are appropriate. You might look into an SSRI and/ or buspar to lower the ongoing anxiety. I have never canceled a big trip, but I've canceled small things. But....it doesn't usually help. It does tend to make the world smaller. It's not a recommended approach. But....sometimes, things are so bad that you can't. I'd take the meds and try really hard to go, though. Movement, change of scenery, that kind of thing usually helps more than it hurts. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 If you can find a way to work through this and not avoid this trip that would probably be the best for you in the long-term. Once you start avoiding it may snowball. Avoidance is not a long-term fix. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lanny Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 Please do not cancel. Go on your vacation and enjoy what you do and your time with your sister. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Splash1 Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 I have wanted to cancel but a friend convinced me not to cancel. I went and had fun. First day or two a bit anxious but then I settled down and enjoyed it 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted October 1, 2019 Author Share Posted October 1, 2019 Quote highly recommend downloading the audio for Claire Weekes’ Pass Through Panic series. She has a great, very effective approach that I have shared with others who have found it very helpful. There’s a lot of written stuff on her approach as well, but her voice is soothing and it could be helpful to you to listen to her and it could start helping you right away. Thank you I will try this. I had another full blown panic attack last night including vomiting, but again got up today, went to work, have lots of nutritious food to snack on, and took a Lorazapam once I got to work. But today is actually better. I am feeling excitement at going, not just anxiousness. And my sister will be the best traveling companion. 16 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommyoffive Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 I am so sorry you are struggling right now. I am glad you are feeling better and getting excited. I hope you have a great time. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alisoncooks Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 I actually canceled a trip last year because of anxiety, and I did regret it later. DH had a conference in a large city, and I was going to tag along and bring the kids. The hotel and travel expenses would've been paid for by his work, and I was planning on taking the kids to a well-known museum/exhibit while he did his obligations. I let my anxiety over several small things talk me out of it (fear of managing transportation in the city, the long car trip, etc). Looking back, I wish we'd gone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gstharr Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 We don't plan things with certain family members because their anxiety attack ruins the whole trip for the rest. Can't tell you how many times we spent good money or time getting somewhere, and to have the attack happen. We've gone to games beach, games, even hikes, where the crowds and jostling caused the attack, then we all have to end the adventure. Just taking them back to the car does not calm things. Now, we just say no to going with them if it involves a crowd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RootAnn Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 6 hours ago, Home'scool said: and took a Lorazapam once I got to work. But today is actually better. I am feeling excitement at going, not just anxiousness. . I see a correlation here.... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaBelle Posted October 2, 2019 Share Posted October 2, 2019 I think you need to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aaplank Posted October 2, 2019 Share Posted October 2, 2019 You might want to take some Black Cohosh to see if your symptoms are in any way menopause related. I would get hot flashes along with panic attacks right after my hysterectomy. After taking black cohosh for a week or two, my symptoms were much better. The hot flashes were very mild and the panic went away. I also have anxiety, not related to menopause, so I understand how difficult it is. Maybe just focus on one day at a time. Don't think about your vacation as a whole with all that you want to do and experience. Try not to put too much thought or planning into it. Just take it day by day, allowing yourself to go by whim. If you don't feel like doing something on a particular day, change plans. Do whatever you feel like, eat whatever or wherever you like, stay in the hotel room all day ordering room service, etc. Be foot loose and fancy free! Give yourself room to breathe. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G5052 Posted October 2, 2019 Share Posted October 2, 2019 I'm not going to share details, but one of my kids and I both have battled complex PTSD and take anti-anxiety meds. We are both hoping to get off of them at some point, but still very much need them at times. For us, we do better if we take them every day. There's nothing to apologize about if it helps you. My kid and I had a trip where she was nearly always either in the bathroom or in the hotel room because of her anxiety. Now she attends a large university and commutes by bus with all kinds of uncertainty and does fine. Not long ago the bus didn't arrive, and there was a student she didn't know who got off a bus going the other way who offered to drive a group of them there. She made a quick decision to do that and wasn't anxious. That was major progress. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted October 2, 2019 Author Share Posted October 2, 2019 Thank you all for your support. I spent the last two days breathing deeply, taking quick walks outside when I can get away from my desk at work, consciously working to relax my muscles, and taking my medication. I also listened to comedy shows during my commute. Laughter always helps. I feel so much better today. I actually slept through the night last night and woke up without feeling like there was a gorilla on my back. So now I just have butterflies in my stomach which I can handle. This is going to be a complete relax vacation. And I will be with my sister so it's not like I have to pretend to be social haha. We leave tomorrow. I'm glad I am going. I always get nervous and jittery before a vacation but this anxiety was waaaaay over the top. Hopefully I won't have one of those attacks again for a long time. And hopefully I have learned some skills in the last few days to be stronger when and if it happens again. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
easypeasy Posted October 2, 2019 Share Posted October 2, 2019 Ohhhhhh yeah. I've canceled more than a few and always WANT to cancel every other trip we've ever gone on. I've successfully canceled MOST solo/friend trips that were "for me" - have backed myself out of short family trips and stayed home while the fam went elsewhere - but power through on the longer family trips. After the first night is over with, I'm always glad I went and always glad we're on a trip. But getting me there is a fiasco!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted October 2, 2019 Share Posted October 2, 2019 (edited) You might try adding Borage Oil capsules to your vitamin regimen. They helped me a ton with mood issues during perimenopause, and also helped DD with puberty and PMS. They are more for rage/irritation than anything else, but I think they sort of calm down the whole mess. Also, have you tried Rescue Remedy? That is helpful for anxiety for some. Lastly, low sleep and low magnesium can contribute to anxiety, and you can get help with those by having a warm bath with epsom salts in the late evening. Edited October 2, 2019 by Carol in Cal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted October 2, 2019 Share Posted October 2, 2019 (edited) It is probably too late, but is it possible to do a trip closer to home? I'm sorry you are having so much anxiety. I often have anxiety over trips at night, I'm always fine during the day. ETA: Just saw your post that you are feeling better. That's good and I hope you have a great trip. As you take off you can flip off your ex 😀 Kelly Edited October 2, 2019 by SquirrellyMama Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted October 15, 2019 Author Share Posted October 15, 2019 An update ...... I'm back! The trip was a mixed bag. The weather was iffy for half the trip (no fun when you are trying to do Disney parks!) and the anxiety was always lingering, but we went. We did end up coming back two days early because the weather was supposed to rain for the last two days and we were scheduled to get a Nor'Easter for the day we flew back and I didn't want to get stuck for hours in the airport. It is good to be back in my daily schedule. I think the vacation was a bit too long. I am really a homebody and it was just too long away from my bed and my cat and my favorite knitting chair! I'm still struggling with my anxiety. I probably will be until the whole divorce entanglement gets sorted out. Now we are in the phase of "you owe me $5, but I owe you $2, so send me $3..." It is just a mess and I don't know if or how much debt I will be in until I meet with my financial guy. Can I just say ....... anxiety is a real bitch! I just worms it's way into your mind, whispers lies, falsehoods and disrupts your whole sense of normal. I have gone through a lot in my life, as have most people, and always just handled what came my way (what other choice do you have?) but anxiety likes to tell you that you WON'T make it through this time. That it will be catastrophic and you will end up unemployed in Greenland (Princess Bride quote anyone? haha) It's exhausting. Thank you all for your input and support. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 Thanks for the update. So sorry you are going through all this. Hope you can get some relief from your anxiety/depression. There are ways out of the deep, dark thoughts. ((hugs)) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 reported 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twolittleboys Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 Huh, I didn't notice that it was an old thread so I kept reading all the advice to go and thought, doesn't a single person think it might be because of COVID-19/that it might be a good idea to cancel? Took me a while to figure it out! 5 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quebtan Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 (edited) That is actually a really familiar thing to me. I have been doing this on a constant basis for a couple of years. I plan a certain trip for a hell a lot of time, and then just before leaving the house, I become really anxious and decide to stay home. Honestly, I hate this thing, and I have been having a lot of arguments with my wife because of it. I guess it was back in 2019, when my wife actually gave me some red bali kratom a day before leaving so I would be really calm and we could finally take our trip. Edited January 25, 2021 by Quebtan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theelfqueen Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 Zombie thread 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted January 16, 2021 Share Posted January 16, 2021 My friend did. she and her dh were spending three months traveling through Europe. She had tremendous anxiety about going to Spain. The closer it got to the date to go there - the worse the anxiety got. So, they flew back to the US and toured around the US. we were supposed to go to a specific area for camping - but dh was having anxiety. He changed our destination at the last minute without consulting me. He just "told me". Our car died as we drove into the campground. It was near where he grew up - so a family friend came and rescued us. They were leaving town - so lent us a car while ours was in the shop being fixed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 On 9/30/2019 at 1:52 PM, Home'scool said: Ugh I guess I just needed words of encouragement. I was thinking about this issue this morning .... If I had a broken foot I would yell "OW" and people would bring me to a place to have the pain fixed (a hospital) and then they would secure the pain (in a cast) and then I would be allowed to rest and recover until my pain subsided. I would never be expected to show up to work and not limp. Anxiety and panic are different. There is no straightforward fix. There is no cast to put around it. Society doesn't really support resting and recovering from anxiety. You still have to go to work everyday. It's all up to how I deal with it ... deep breathing, mediation, rest, eating well, etc. I am going to counseling. But it is just so hard. When I feel it coming on I feel so out of control. And then, of course, I panic about having panic attacks. And round and round it goes. I just want to yell "HELP" at the top of my lungs because the feeling is so awful and the mind is spinning so hard. But you can't. You have to look inward and try to draw from strength that is severely missing at that moment. Ehhh sort of…I have had multiple injures though and after a bit of rest, I have to go to physical therapy to regain my abilities. So I look at my anxiety like if I allow myself to drop anything that makes me upset, it’s like I don’t do my pt exercises and I’m getting weaker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beth S Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 Zombie Thread! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 Shoot. It got me! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eos Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 I was reading along earnestly but looked at the date when I saw @Selkie's name. @Selkie if you see this, hello! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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