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Everything posted by Home'scool

  1. It was a case where at first I moved down three seats, then a few seats more, then was up against a wall. The only way out was back down the row over 7 people, but I did move haha. It was just so silly being squished in a row when the rest of the theater was empty.
  2. I get what you all are saying .... if a person has a reserved seat and then sit somewhere else then they could get bumped. And I am thinking that maybe the kiosk is not set up yet for picking seats because it is a new system? IDK. It just struck me as so ridiculous that we were all squished in the same row and the rest of the theater was empty. It's very likely I am just getting old and crotchety! This reminds me of a somewhat similar situation: When my girls were little we had to endure those 4 hour recitals at the end of the year. Of course everyone brought friends and grandparents and whatnot, and getting good seats (general admission) was always a crush. One recital we had great seats, middle center, and 10 minutes into the recital the fire alarm went off. Everyone had to leave the building, and when we came back in ..... you guessed it! Everyone grabbed for new seats causing a lot of bickering and bitching. Crowds of people just never do well together.😁
  3. I love movies. I especially love action, adventure and sci-fi movies, which are great to watch on a big screen at the theater. But .... I just can't handle people anymore. Being out in the general public means that you take your chances you will run into someone obnoxious. My local movie theater has instituted a new system where you have to choose a seat when you buy your ticket. I usually go to the self-serve kiosk instead of the long line at the ticket counter to buy my tickets, and the kiosk does not require you to pick a seat. I did not think it would be a problem because I never go to the movies during peak times. I am always the one going on a random Thursday at 1:00 when there will be only a few people. So I am sitting in the row and seat I want in a COMPLETELY EMPTY theater. Two people come in and say "that is my seat" to me. Ugh. Okay I will move down a few. Then 4 more people came in, same thing. So I move down again, and then realize that we are now 7 people squished in the same row, and all the other rows are empty! Ridiculous, but once people had those tickets in their hand they were NOT going to sit in a seat right next to the assigned. I know, I know, I am the one who doesn't have a reserved seat. But, really?! Your ticket says Seat 8A and you can't sit in 10A? Then I went to the movies this Saturday to see the Avengers. Again, no matter where I sat, one of the 8 other people who came in behind me claimed my seat. After shuffling around a bit I ended up near some man who proceeded to burp loudly. I finally moved to the furthest corner of the theater with the worst view just to get away from people. I'm just going to save up for a HUGE tv and stay home to watch movies. 😞
  4. The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. Hate means you are still emotionally attached to the person and are still expending energy on them. There have been people in my life that I have felt hate for but I always know in the back of my mind that if I hold onto that hate for too long it will start to corrupt me. I wait for the time when I can think of that person with indifference. Then I know that they can no longer hurt me. For an situation like the one with my STBX, and where I am still embroiled in the drama with him, I feel hate. There are many times in the car, when I am alone, that I will say out loud through tears "I HATE you". Because right now I do. But once this is over I will work toward indifference.
  5. I have two tattoos -- One that is a sketch of a sleeping cat on my inner forearm. To me, nothing is more relaxing that watching a cat who is snoozing. If cat is sleeping it means everything is calm, peaceful and warm. So when I look at my sleeping cat it helps calm me down! The other tattoo refers to my divorce. It runs up my other arm and says "She had not know the weight until she felt the freedom". I just love that one. My daughter graduated with a degree in Biology, so she got the chemical composition for adrenaline tattooed on her ribs. She is a real adventure seeker so it fits her. She also has a compass tattooed on her with the saying "Explore, Dream, Discover" to remind her of her Outward Bound experience. Her take on tattoos is this: "I have my body for anywhere from 0-100 years. When I die and before my body is returned, I want it to be representative of me, what I have gone through, who I am." My youngest daughter has tattooed, in Italian, "God is within her, she will not fall"
  6. Home'scool


    It is an assumption on my part, just hearing about how much he gives to Jewish charities and the such. I do know that he has talked extensively about this late wife and how much of his charitable work is in her honor. Personally I think it is a huge dishonor to the memory of his wife to pay for sex from a sketchy place. Maybe I am just annoyed by his situation as I am deep in Patriots territory here and everyone here is offering excuses for him.
  7. Home'scool


    For me, when I raised my children I saw instructing them in our faith and instructing them in moral behaviors, as kind of a Venn diagram. Some things overlapped, but most of the moral lessons stood alone; lessons on being a good person, on treating others kindly, etc. I never really tied it into "because God is watching" or anything else like that. Both my children are spiritual but not church-going. But if they came to be atheists I would still know that they would be good people because they want to be good people, because that is how they were raised, because they have set standards for themselves, because it makes them feel good to help, because they were instilled with the concept of empathy, etc. Religion or beliefs in a higher power do not a kind person make.
  8. Home'scool


    UGH I wish I had not started this thread. It has gone in a direction I did not want it to go, but again, I take responsibility for that. I did not express myself well. I never ever wanted to imply that atheists are more apt to live a bad life, or murder people, or be thugs. I do not believe that and I do not want to perpetuate that idea. I do not think that people who believe in God are better people. I know a lot of people who are front and center in their church every Sunday who deserve a special seat in Hell. I know a lot of people who never go to church and do not live by rules of the bible who should be ushered straight to Heaven (if there is such a place) I was musing about the concept of someone who DOES believe in an afterlife still committing a murder for purely selfish reasons. I was wondering how they would justify that in their mind. I guess the answer just boils down to cognitive dissonance. I am assuming that is how Robert Kraft justifies paying for women who are probably forced to service him. But the fact that I muse about Robert Kraft does NOT mean I think all men are bad, or that men that are widowed are more apt to pay for sex. I never wanted to imply that my musings about one group of people means I believe that another group of people (atheists) do not have that worry, and therefore would be willing to murder people willy-nilly.
  9. Home'scool


    I apologize. I did not mean to imply that at all. I knew I was not doing a good job explaining myself. NVM
  10. Home'scool


    NVM I did a bad job trying to start a conversation
  11. Pantyhouse were the bane of my existence! They were so expensive, always ran, were uncomfortable, UGH! I used to buy the L'Eggs in those little containers. I wore "Nude, size B, Reinforced toe, Regular tummy support". Do you know how many times they would actually have that specific one? Never! I would stand in front of a literal jungle of pantyhose choices and they would have the right size but the color would be wrong, or some combination like that. I hope and plan to never have to wear pantyhose again.
  12. But I just figured out that I can download a series from Netflix (Ken Burns "The West") and then listen to it via Bluetooth in my car! I commute about 45 min to an hour each way so I am always trying to find good books on tape without spending a ton of money. Now I can listen to documentaries that are on Netflix that I haven't had time to watch. I usually am doing something else while watching TV anyways, so listening without seeing pictures should be fine. I really hate my commute but I am excited about this!
  13. OMG MOCK TRIAL! My daughters participated in Mock Trial but after they re-entered school. It is such an amazing program: public speaking, logic, the art of the argument. They both said it was harder than an AP class they took and required much more work!
  14. I've always tried to live by the philosophy of "When someone shows you who they are, believe them" I spent years trying to build a healthy relationship with my mother after she married my 3rd stepfather. The two of them were train wrecks who, once they met each other, really picked up their dysfunction. My stepfather's daughter cut him out of her life completely, while I tried to stay and work with them. In the end she was the one who missed all the tears, all the lies and all the betrayal they dished out. She was definitely the smarter one. If the father isn't changing his attitude, or taking responsibility for anything, then I would leave it alone.
  15. So sweet of you to ask! I am doing ok. Some days are definitely harder than others. Monday was our 30th anniversary. That made me sad. We (or at least I) was so in love on that day. I thought it was the luckiest day of my life. We were so young, 22 and 24 years old. And we had so many struggles when first married. But once things started to smooth out for us he must have just got itchy and started looking for other things.
  16. Haha I love the phrase "deferred justice benefit"! I has been such a slog through these last 4 years, but living with my sister has been such a blessing. I am happier now on a daily basis because I no longer have him judging or criticizing me. Overall, though, having this over my head has taken a toll on me. I used to wake up in the middle of the night shaking all over like a convulsion almost. It didn't hurt but I would just shake and shake. I also have been on medication for anxiety which helps. If I get alimony under the old tax laws I will be fine with paying taxes, I will just have to make sure that the weekly amount reflects that.
  17. Any suggestions on how to handle this? Because the lawyers are already talking about lower alimony payments
  18. If I file "married filing separately" then the IRS can make me pay on the alimony payments I did receive. If we just file as "married" then I will not have to claim the alimony payments as income.
  19. Yes, he wants to file "married filing separately" which would make me file the same way, and then I would get slammed with taxes. We need to file joint in order for me not to get a huge tax bill
  20. If we file "married but filing separately" he would not be able to claim deductions on his alimony payments and I would not have to pay taxes on them. I also just realized, due to the change in the tax laws if we had settled this divorce anytime before 2019 he would have been grandfathered in to claim his alimony payments as deductions. Now that we will not settle until 2019, he will not be able to claim payments as deductions, and I will not have to claim them as income! So, the new tax law creates a financial loss for him and a benefit for me 🙂
  21. My soon-to-be divorced albatross around my neck! It's a good thing we are only 6 weeks away from a judge trial. After 4 years of this maybe it will finally end! In the past my STBX has always handled doing the taxes for us. About 2 months ago I forwarded him, through our lawyers, my 2018 tax paperwork. I received a letter from his attorney on Friday, April 12th (3 days before the filing deadline), informing me that my STBX has decided to file taxes "single". In the past he has always done the taxes, and has continued to do so throughout our drawn out divorce. Except, he didn't file yet for 2017, and now he wants me to file "single" for 2017 - can you say late charges?- and 2018. I think he just figured out that he gets to claim the alimony payments and I have to pay taxes on those payments. If I file single I will have to pay upwards of $30,000 in taxes. When we sold our house in 2017 we put the profit from the house in an IOLTA account with the lawyer. He then used up his half of the profits of the house to grudgingly pay me alimony, and now he HATES the idea that I still have money left over from the sale of the house and he doesn't, so he would rather see that money go to the government than go to me. So even though none of his alimony payments actually came from his weekly salary he still wants to claim them and screw me over. And he still owes me over 16 weeks of alimony! My attorney shot back a letter basically saying "no way, no how", but it will probably be another issue for the judge to decide. If he does decide against me in this tax situation I will just have to deal with the consequences. I just want to know where Hell ends and my new life begins so I can start to rebuild and plan, etc. According to my attorney, as of next year alimony payments will not be taxed (nor will they be deductions) so I shouldn't be facing a bill like this again. He also has been stalling in informing me how much of a bonus he got in March. It probably was between $70,000 and $100,000 so I will fight like a wet cat for a piece of that if he makes me pay those taxes.
  22. When I was at my 8th grade dance they had a dance competition to the song "Dancing Queen" by ABBA. My girlfriend and I did this choreography that had "the bump" (remember that dance move?) in it. We actually won haha. I got a copy of ABBA's album, and then a kid I had a huge crush on asked me to dance right afterwards. When I was in college we were pre-gaming (drinking and such while getting dressed) on Halloween, and the song "Joy to the World" by Three Dog Night came on. We started singing it at the top of our lungs, and I remember looking around at my circle of friends and thinking how happy I was in that moment.
  23. Thank you Thank you Thank you for clearing that up for me!! You guys are the best
  24. Okay, so this is where I am confused ...... I am trying to figure out some details on my divorce settlement. I would like to say that my husband makes X% more than me, but somehow saying he makes 567% more than me doesn't seem to make sense? I also wanted to use that figure to divide up debt, so if he makes 75% more than me he should take on 75% of the debt. That type of thing.
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