Tmhearn Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 This thread is sort of a s/o from the jury thread. But I've seen it before in other threads. People suggest that someone just hire a babysitter like that is a normal thing to do. I have never hired a babysitter. My kids have been watched by my mom a few times a year and 1 or 2 other relatives a hand full of times. I have 1 friend who has watched them a handful of times for an hour or so in an emergency. They've never been to school, daycare, church nursery, gym daycare, etc. Â Am I the only person who does not use paid sitters? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elise1mds Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I've never used them, but that's only because I can't ever FIND them. I don't know any college-aged kids or adults who babysit regularly other than family. I won't hire teens because my kids are... challenging, to say the least. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 My mom is the only person other than DH and I who gets to watch the kids. I'm not sure if I would be more open if my oldest didn't have severe food allergies, but probably not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 No, you are not but many of us did use or still use either babysitters, nanny services or daycare drop-off. I only used teen babysitters with my oldest. Then I switched to using either daycare dropoff or drop in care at adult babysitters who usually were taking care of regular customers. All those were regulated and licensed. When my kids got older, I sometimes used nanny services because my son was too old for daycare or babysitters but not old enough to take care of his younger sisters yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissad2 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I have never used a babysitter. Either my mom or my dh keep the kids when I work (I only work on weekends). If I need to do something without the kids during the week they stay with my mom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I never used babysitters until my older kids were old enough to watch my younger children. Â Now I leave them whenever I want. Â In fact I'm going to the movies tonight. WooooHooooo! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kristi26 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I don't even know where to find a babysitter that isn't related to us. I think there is one 15 year old girl who says she wants to babysit our kids but she lives 45 minutes away, would need a ride to our house, and is only 3 years older than our oldest kid so it would be a little weird. So no, I only ever have family or DH and I watch my kids. I've had the occasional friend do it as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dm379 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I've always had to. Dh works away a lot and we don't live near family. Even using sitters, I was only away from my kids once every few months and it was NOT good for me. We love our teen sitters. The one we have now will come over to play with them and takes them to the movies and stuff with her. She's a great "big sister" to them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrookValley. Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 No, I've never really hired a babysitter. I have a flexible work schedule with my full-time job (so I am at home 98% of the time), and my husband or mother-in-law is available to be with my son when I go to my out-of-the home, part-time job. This summer, however, we have a temporary housemate (a co-worker of mine from my part-time job, who is between schools and will be leaving this fall). In exchange for the room, she's helping us out around the house, and that has included one half-day per week keeping my son while I go into my office. It has been GREAT. Now I'm considering hiring a part-time sitter so I can continue having some time in the office, but it's hard to find someone. Also, I am having a hard time justifying paying someone what the going rate is. Not because I don't think it's fair, but because the percentage of what I would pay a babysitter isn't worth it for what I make per hour. Most babysitters ask for $12 - $20 per hour. I have hard time wrapping my brain around going to work just to pay the babysitter! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KS_ Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We haven't ever used babysitters. My dad and stepmom watch the kids occasionally and my mom and stepdad have also, but it's not on a regular basis (my mom and stepdad don't live in the same state, so it has only been when they've visited). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kricau Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Nope you are not alone. I havent had a "paid" sitter for years. My mom, sisters, cousin are my sitters :) But you know the saying "you get what you pay for" LOL Just joking, they are great. Just sometimes not available. Â Am I the only person who does not use paid sitters? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Depends on how you define babysitters. Â I've never left my kids with someone I don't really know for a few hours so I could go do something, if that's what you mean. A few years ago, I signed up for a service so I would have some backups in case I needed them, but I never followed through and have never needed them yet. Â But my kids have been cared for by many people. Â First, the foster families who had them until I took custody a little before age 1. Â Then the nanny I hired to care for them while I worked upstairs in my home. Â Then the preschool/daycare they've gone to from about age 2.5 to now (age 5.5). And Sunday School teachers, coaches, etc. Â Outside of that, I've used my sister and occasionally my dad or a friend to help out in a pinch. I usually take my kids wherever I go outside of work hours. Â I keep getting marketing emails from babysitter staffing services. Each time I get one I think, I'm so lucky I haven't had to use them; now if we can hold out a few more years, the kids can start hanging out on their own when necessary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hthnmamax2 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 My immediate family and DH's immediate were the only ones I allowed to be alone with my kids when they were little. I was molested by my 14 year old babysitter when I was seven so the very idea of someone I hadn't known for years being alone with my kids sent me into panic attacks. :sad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I never have. If my extended family can not babysit I simply don't go to whatever it is. Now my big 2 are old enough to watch the youngers and that helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athena1277 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We have never hired a babysitter. Mostly it's because we can't afford it. My mom will babysit so dh and I can go out when she visits 2-3 times per year. I also have a few friends that I can call if something comes up where I can't take one or both of them with me, like when I need to go to the dentist/doctor and dh can't get off work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caraway Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We have never used babysitters. Just the rare use of grandparents. Needing to produce a babysitter all of a sudden (like for jury duty) would feel like being told to ask the tooth fairy over for dinner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mimm Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I use family constantly, but I've never hired anyone to watch my kids. I might have done so if I didn't have so much family I could take advantage of. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Other than a friend on rare occasions (and we just trade off, not exchange money), my kids aren't left with others. ETA: Oh, and no doubt my bigs will watch the littles a few times after adoption. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forget-Me-Not Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We have my parents and ILs in the area, so they babysit occasionally. When they aren't available, I have a couple of teenage girls from church that I hire. I also have a few friends that I could swap with during the daytime/school day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 No, we don't have a sitter. In this season of our family, we do things with children or when the other parent is home. If my husband takes overtime and I have to work, I either find someone to take my shift or they come to work with me. In fact, they came to work with me this morning, though it was just for 90 minutes while I taught a class. My husband is doing some plumbing work under a ticking clock while the water is shut off at the meter, and he needed to go for supplies, so they came with me and played foosball while I was in class. (He wanted to be able to think without interruption while he was at Lowe's.... Soooooooooo high-maintenance, he is! :lol:) Â If I had a life-threatening emergency while he was at work, sure I could have our neighbors watch the kids until he could get home, collect them and head to the ER, but jury duty is not emergent. They haven't called me in the 23 years since I've been a registered voter, so they can wait until my children are old enough to be on their own for althe day, with me down the street (the courthouses are both within walking distance of our house). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I've used tons of sitters. My kids were 9,6,3.. with the two oldest being my step kids. The older girls were always old enough to let me know what went on... and by the time I had a baby, even my 5 year old was old enough to tell me. Usually when my baby needed watched, my mom would watch him. Lucky me, now that I have older kids, they usually watch my son if I need them. I guess I just need time off. Oh well. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaners Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 When we lived near my family, my father or sister would "borrow" my oldest for an afternoon or evening. We moved away right around her first birthday. Since then, we have had friends watch the children while others were born. That would be 2 nights. My husband and I went to dinner once when my mother came to visit. We are hiring someone to watch our children when I go into labor. Â My daughters have been in a few Sunday School classes. They have both done children's choir at church. I don't consider that babysitting as much as an extracurricular activity, but those are activities where I wasn't present to supervise 100% of the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murphy101 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We have never used babysitters. Just the rare use of grandparents. Needing to produce a babysitter all of a sudden (like for jury duty) would feel like being told to ask the tooth fairy over for dinner. Â Yep. That's us too. At most, to us, babysitters are what you get when you are in labor and going to the hospital.:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Nope, no sitters here. Just family occasionally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Embassy Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 No sitters here either - not even family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinaBlue Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Our parents live out of state, but they occasionally watch them when they visit, and DD did PT preschool the past two years. A good work friend of DH's helped us out for several hours when I was delivering DS and little DD. Those are really the only times they've been left with anyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firefly Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Well mine are teens now and stay on their own; but no we never used sitters when they were younger. We were very fortunate to have family available. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom22ns Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We never used a baby sitter. My mom lived 4 hours away, but would visit regularly and babysit for us to go out while she was here. She would have come if I had jury duty too, but she died 9 years ago. Â My MIL used to babysit once a year so dh and I could go out for our anniversary. That's pretty much it here. Â Now my kids are teens and the issue is past. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Element Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We've never used a paid sitter either. My ILs watched the kids maybe 5 times when they still lived by us, and our neighbor watched the kids once. I'm looking forward to a date night one of these years! Â (The kids did go to public school for a while, which I would have totally called "babysitting," :tongue_smilie: but I don't think that's what the OP meant.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigMamaBird Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 My oldest will be seven soon and we've never used a paid babysitter. Both our parents, two of our Grandmothers, both dh's sisters and my brother all live in the area and are very free and easy with their baby sitting time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 (edited) I did, although we have a good support system. We have a large extended family, and good friends. I often hired young Mother Helpers in the past. I used to work out at a gym, and used the gym childcare, which my kids thought was a blast. None of my bio children ever had a bottle, and I nursed for years. I can't quite remember how that all worked out, but it did. When my oldest was old enough, he did a great job caring for the kids; they actually cared for each other, truth be told. My youngest was born old. She currently has a job she loves (and pays well) as a Mother's Helper. The kids adore her, and beg their mother daily to call her. lol It's fun for them, and an excellent way for a child her age to make some money. Edited July 20, 2012 by LibraryLover Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoot Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 DS is 13 now and we have never used a paid sitter. The only people who have ever watched him have been grandparents. He did go to nursery a few times at church when he was preschool age but only because he is an only child and wanted desperately to play with the other kids. Of course, at this point he occasionally goes to sleepovers, but I consider that something entirely different. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I'm always jealous of the people with family nearby. We don't have that, so we absolutely use sitters and now sleepovers sometimes to get a night out or to take care of business. Â Some people never leave their kids. I respect it, but I can't do that personally. Even if I didn't want to occasionally have a night out with dh, sometimes we have commitments that just require that we do things (you know, like jury duty and doctor's appointments). I'd rather have a few names I'm willing to call on and have kids comfortable with being left for a few hours. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jewellsmommy Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I have not ever used a babysitter. Dd has been watched by my mom, brother, friends, church family, even our Pastor (for a whole week!) but not a paid sitter. The closest thing to that would be when a group of youth (under the direction of an adult) watched the children of the church while the parents went to see a movie. Â Since ds has come along, it is pretty much my mom and a small group of my close friends/church family that can handle him and his unique issues. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jelbe5 Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Rarely used a sitter for my kiddos. Sometimes a friend and I would trade sitting. I did have a dependable teen from church sit a few times. Now my oldest watches the youngers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 (edited) I'm always jealous of the people with family nearby. We don't have that, so we absolutely use sitters and now sleepovers sometimes to get a night out or to take care of business. Some people never leave their kids. I respect it, but I can't do that personally. Even if I didn't want to occasionally have a night out with dh, sometimes we have commitments that just require that we do things (you know, like jury duty and doctor's appointments). I'd rather have a few names I'm willing to call on and have kids comfortable with being left for a few hours.   I have paid babysitters. Nephews, cousins, Mothers' Helpers etc.  I always liked to go out a bit, even if just to the bookstore, or for a glass of wine with dh. Sometimes we were gone just one or two hours. We used to go to the movies (although not in ages and ages), and that's 90 minutes, plus some travel. I did nurse a baby through Schindler's List (that would have been too long to leave a young nursling for me). The non-stop nursing kept me from losing it.  I also used to love a particular dance class at the gym. That made me so happy, and always lifted my spirits. lol I needed that class when I had so many little ones. It gave me energy, and the instructor was so inspiring. I always tried to make sure the kids were happy and having fun. Sometimes other people really are more fun than Mom. :) I felt comfortable with my choices of babysitters. They did as well. They have good memories.  I understand some people don't have support, desire, or even the money for any sort of child care. I get that. Everyone has different needs and resources. Edited July 20, 2012 by LibraryLover Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathryn Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We've never paid a sitter either. One, ODS is autistic and can be very defiant and violent. And two, we don't have the kind of money to pay someone we'd trust to be capable of handling him if things went badly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danybug Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We have never hired a babysitter before. My parents are the only ones that I have ever had watch the kids for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coffeetime Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 She currently has a job she loves (and pays well) as a Mother's Helper. The kids adore her, and beg their mother daily to call her. lol It's fun for them, and an excellent way for a child her age to make some money. :D Our favorite sitter, whom we all adore, goes to college during the school year. The kids miss her so much while she's gone! She sends them letters and care packages from school and they absolutely love that! When summer rolls around, she's the only one they want to watch them. They actually get all excited for us to go out, because that means A is coming! We are so blessed to have her. Some people never leave their kids. I respect it, but I can't do that personally. Even if I didn't want to occasionally have a night out with dh, sometimes we have commitments that just require that we do things (you know, like jury duty and doctor's appointments). I'd rather have a few names I'm willing to call on and have kids comfortable with being left for a few hours. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Splash Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I've never hired a babysitter either. DD has food allergies that are a challenge for even family members who have been dealing with it for years. I didn't want to put that responsibility on someone else. Also for awhile after each adoption we didn't want to stress the kids out so kept it to family members watching kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theYoungerMrsWarde Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I am blessed to have in-laws that are only 5 minutes away and a friend with kids who is also 5 minutes away. I have never had to pay for a babysitter (although there have been times I had to take them somewhere because neither of my options could take them.) I don't know anyone I would be willing to ask watch them, and I couldn't afford it even if I did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We have never used a paid sitter. There is only one non-family member who's cared for Rebecca, and they're practically family. Â We do not live near family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I think we asked an auntie, once, so hubby could go to see his grown daughter's graduation, and once for a dentist visit, and once for a funeral, but other than that, no. Kiddo is getting old enough, I might just park him in my office with something to play with, and warn the very nice IT people around my office he was there. I could pop back and see him every 90 minutes or so. He's a snooper, so I'd leave the file cabinet unlocked, and it would keep him happy for quite awhile. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momma aimee Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 This thread is sort of a s/o from the jury thread. But I've seen it before in other threads. People suggest that someone just hire a babysitter like that is a normal thing to do. I have never hired a babysitter. My kids have been watched by my mom a few times a year and 1 or 2 other relatives a hand full of times. I have 1 friend who has watched them a handful of times for an hour or so in an emergency. They've never been to school, daycare, church nursery, gym daycare, etc. Am I the only person who does not use paid sitters?  no you are not and I think THAT is wonderful.  we do not hire sitters -- we do have friends we know that watch the boys some now (at 4.5 and 6.5)  we have used a mother's helper -- but she was the DD of a DF and part of the family. we saw her more at park day, play date and dinner than we ever did when she 'worked'. the kids love her 9and miss her now that she has moved out on her own to another state). so i guess we don't really count in the 'never used a sitter' group -- but i feel confident the only people that have ever cared for the boys have a true concern and love for them and while we might pay them it is not a job for them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 (edited) This thread is sort of a s/o from the jury thread. But I've seen it before in other threads. People suggest that someone just hire a babysitter like that is a normal thing to do. I have never hired a babysitter. My kids have been watched by my mom a few times a year and 1 or 2 other relatives a hand full of times. I have 1 friend who has watched them a handful of times for an hour or so in an emergency. They've never been to school, daycare, church nursery, gym daycare, etc. Am I the only person who does not use paid sitters?  I do not know how to find one :( Our youngest has some special behavior-related needs. We cannot leave him with a teen. I have tried to find adult sitters for occasional use in the past, but I have never been able to find one who is reliable about showing up - there was one who was fabulous, but she had just graduated from a teaching program and went on to get a teaching job . A couple have just gone no-communication after sitting for him once :( I know he's not easy and I am up-front about that and I pay well. I really would need to find someone with special qualifications I think, and I don't know how to do that. We have no local family, and it really does not work out for any friends to watch him (they have their own kids to deal with and he is kind of a handful) so with no way to find a suitable sitter it is really hard. If I found someone, we would use their services occasionally. Edited July 19, 2012 by laundrycrisis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoVanGogh Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 For the most part, we have never used a sitter in 10 years of parenthood. We don't have family around and hate to ask friends. Living in the city, we have not found teenagers we trust. Â 1.) I had surgery when DS was four-years-old. I was in the hospital three days leading up to the surgery and DH kept DS with him the whole time. (Hospital actually set up a bed for DH and DS.) The afternoon of my surgery, though, DS went to a friend's house and spent the night. Â 2.) DH was out of town on business and I needed to be in three places at the same time. :tongue_smilie: A friend watched DS at sports practice, then took him home to watch. Â 3.) I was out of town, taking care of a critically ill parent, when DH had an important business meeting. Normally, DH would have taken DS to work with him anyway, but DS had an activity he didn't want to miss and friend's kids were in same activity so friend watched DS. Â Â I kept DS with me when DH had surgery and complications afterward. Not ideal, but the timing of the surgery was awful. If I have a doctor appointment I can't take DS along with, DH takes DS to work with him. But I generally do take DS to the doctor with me... Â Jury duty? DH would probably take DS with him to work, but I would probably need help driving to the city courthouse so DH would probably take day off work and drive me. :tongue_smilie: Â Â Ironically, my sister just mentioned that her daughter has jury duty. My niece has six young children and cannot afford (nor find!) sitters for that many children. My sister is taking vacation time to watch her grandchildren. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AHASRADA Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Nope, never used a sitter. Our situation:  dc birth to ages 7 & 4: parents 15 min. away, watched them whenever necessary  dc ages 7-9 &4-6: moved away from family, just managed. Kids went with me everywhere. I did have jury duty once, and my mom came to stay with us for 2 weeks, just in case. I wasn't chosen and was home within a few hours.  dc ages 10 & 7: lived in same bldg. as in-laws, always adults in the house to keep an eye on them if we went out  dc ages 11 & 8 to present: Managed until kids were old enough to stay home alone. Dh also works from home now, so someone is usually around. Big dc now babysit baby. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaleidoscope Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 We've used a sitter once. Â We have children with medical issues so that just complicates things. Otherwise I might use a sitter more. But I also don't know too many people who babysit. Â My sister has watched our kids when we had to have them watched. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted July 20, 2012 Share Posted July 20, 2012 I have heard of women showing up to Jury duty WITH their children to prove they have no babysitter and have had the Judge say to them, "You will find someone to watch your children by tomorrow or the court will find someone for you and you will pay him/her." Â So, from what I understand, you could be forced to in NC. Â My oldest is now 14.5 years old so I would be ok now if it happened. Â Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissad2 Posted July 20, 2012 Share Posted July 20, 2012 We have never used babysitters. Just the rare use of grandparents. Needing to produce a babysitter all of a sudden (like for jury duty) would feel like being told to ask the tooth fairy over for dinner. Â :iagree::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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