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So...I did a thing

fairfarmhand

By fairfarmhand,
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fairfarmhand

fairfarmhand

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I never went to college. I got married young and started having babies and then homeschooled them so there never really was a good time for me to do this.

I graduated child 3 of 4 last spring and this summer I started the process of enrolling at my local community college. I also studied and took a few CLEP tests, so I already have 9 credits just from that. I'm just signed up for 2 classes for the fall. Fingers crossed they don't take too much time. I stay pretty busy already, so this is kind of a stretch, but I really feel like now is the time or I will never do it. 

My ds15 is in virtual school and still needs quite a bit of support in his schooling. (He just does. He's one of those kids)

We have the farm which I do a significant amount of work on.

I teach a drama class.

I work a few hours a week at our church . (may be stepping back from that.)

So this morning, I ordered my books and classes start Monday.

I'm excited, scared and all of the feelings. It almost feels surreal. I haven't been in a classroom for over 25 years. 

 

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JustEm

JustEm

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That's great! I hope the classes go well and you are able to manage everything well enough.

My dh just started the path to get his bachelor's. It has been great and not so great all at the same time. But it will be well worth the sacrifices we're all making right now.

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2ndGenHomeschooler

2ndGenHomeschooler

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That’s amazing! I’m hoping to do the same in a few years. My situation is similar - married young, had babies, homeschooled babies….One has graduated and second is a senior. Third has two years left. Then I’d like to go to school. I’m thinking I can possibly manage that when I’m only homeschooling one. CLEP is a good idea. 
 

GOOD LUCK! 

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fairfarmhand

fairfarmhand

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2 hours ago, Amethyst said:

Yay! Exciting! Community colleges are such a great deal. What courses are you taking? English? Bio? Psych? Philosophy?

This semester I’m taking a communications class and an art class. 
 

long term…my goal is to become a marriage and family therapist. Which if you knew my family and some of the dysfunction is kind of ridiculous but I’ve wanted this for so long.

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Ginevra

Ginevra

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GO YOU!!! 
 

I did that starting at age 38; it was one of the best decisions I ever made. It took five years to get an AA. But it leveled up my life in dozens of ways. 
 

I’ll never forget what dh said when I was scared/nervous/excited to begin this task. I said, “Why should I do this, though, really?” To which he replied, “Because you will love it.” That was all I needed to hear to know it was a good decision. 

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Lady Marmalade

Lady Marmalade

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This is amazing! I've enjoyed school so much the last few years.  Figuring out adding schooling to my schedule was an adjustment for the whole family, but it's been worth it so far.    After graduating in May, I decided to keep going and transfered to a university where I can complete my bachelors and also continue with my masters if I decide I want to keep going.  You'll do great! Are your classes in person? 

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freesia

freesia

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29 minutes ago, Kassia said:

Fantastic!  I hope you love it.  I think older/non traditional students appreciate their classes so much more than college-age students (in general). 

I agree. I noticed that when I was in college. The mature students were so “all in” and tended to do well. I thought it was in part because they had to fit it in with kids and houses and they just had to be more organized and dedicated to make it work. I also thought their maturity was a positive in class discussions. 

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Soror

Soror

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Congratulations 🎉🎉🎉

I hope it is a wonderful experience for you. I'm sure you will do well. You are smart and a hard worker. Besides all those things you've taught the kids over the years counts for something.

Dh is on his last year of his bachelor's. He had wiped out if school before we got together. Dh still  doesn't like school but sees it as a means to an end and is mature enough now to buckle down and get through it. 

He has taken 9 hrs most semesters, full-time a couple of times. 9 has been mostly doable, although still hard with a FT job and family. He was still involved with Scouts when he started but slowly backed down at my insistence. With all you do I'd be thinking about what you can drop if needed. 

I've thought about pursuing another career and possibly another degree for that. I'm waiting for dh to finish and I see what happens with hsing my younger ones before looking into it more 

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regentrude

regentrude

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35 minutes ago, freesia said:

I agree. I noticed that when I was in college. The mature students were so “all in” and tended to do well. I thought it was in part because they had to fit it in with kids and houses and they just had to be more organized and dedicated to make it work. 

I notice that with my non-traditional students. I think one important factor is that they are going to college because *they* really want to, not because of a parent's expectation. I remember a 40+ y/o with teenage kids  who had owned a grocery store and sold his store in order to pay for college. He kept saying failing is not an option.

The older students tend to do well. Where they're rusty, they compensate with determination. 

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Kidlit

Kidlit

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30 minutes ago, regentrude said:

I notice that with my non-traditional students. I think one important factor is that they are going to college because *they* really want to, not because of a parent's expectation. I remember a 40+ y/o with teenage kids  who had owned a grocery store and sold his store in order to pay for college. He kept saying failing is not an option.

The older students tend to do well. Where they're rusty, they compensate with determination. 

I taught freshman comp at a local community college off and on for 15 years, and I absolutely found this to be true.  I know teachers shouldn't have favorite students (😉), but my returning students were mine!

Best wishes on this new and exciting adventure!  Homeschooling is perhaps the best preparation you could've had!

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Jaybee

Jaybee

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4 hours ago, Ginevra said:

I’ll never forget what dh said when I was scared/nervous/excited to begin this task. I said, “Why should I do this, though, really?” To which he replied, “Because you will love it.” That was all I needed to hear to know it was a good decision. 

What a wonderful answer!

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Faith-manor

Faith-manor

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Rah rah rah!!! I am cheering you on. I have really annoyed my physics and engineering classes. I wasn't degree seeking because I already have two bachelor's degrees. But I completed a general sciences major that I had started as a minor way back in the mists of time in college. It isn't enough to give me a BS (my degrees are BA's, so different gen eds), but if I needed to get into teaching, it makes me qualified for both music and science at the secondary level, and it makes me qualified to work a lot of STEM outreach programs. I have know idea if I will ever use it. But I am so happy I took the classes. When dd went into premature labor, I had to withdraw from classes and go take care of my grandsons. Yet, I was able to make it up this summer. So even when our hectic lives intrude, it is possible to find a way forwars.

Happy studies!

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WendyLady

WendyLady

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That is so exciting!! Congratulations!! I feel like I have been on the same journey - I married young and didn't go to college. As my youngest neared graduation about 3 years ago, I started taking college classes and will be graduating with my bachelor's degree in December!! I have just one last class and an internship during the fall semester. It has been extremely rewarding. It took me a couple of semesters to remember that I am a good student and to not be terrified at the beginning of each new semester. I am planning to continue on to a masters and maybe more... 

I hope you love your classes!! 

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fairfarmhand

fairfarmhand

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You guys.

This seems really silly, but I want you all to know how much it means that you are excited for me. There are some people in my life who are not a fan of this plan. They dont' understand it, they think its a waste of time and effort and can't get why I wouldn't just "retire" when my ds graduates in 3 years when I am 46?  They didn't like school at all and only saw it as a means to an end (a good job) and don't get it that I always loved school and learning.

This person is important to me, so it stings a bit that they can't get it. I'm not a person who will be happy sitting around clipping coupons and waiting for the grandkids to come by. That sounds like the most boring thing ever.

So it really means so much that you all get it. You get my excitement, you understand the years of waiting and putting other people's needs/wants first.  Thank you for understanding and being excited for me. 

I know pretty much none of you in real life, but this bit of common ground and sharing joy makes me feel so close to all of you. I love you guys. Thanks so much.

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Ditto

Ditto

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2 minutes ago, fairfarmhand said:

You guys.

This seems really silly, but I want you all to know how much it means that you are excited for me. There are some people in my life who are not a fan of this plan. They dont' understand it, they think its a waste of time and effort and can't get why I wouldn't just "retire" when my ds graduates in 3 years when I am 46?  They didn't like school at all and only saw it as a means to an end (a good job) and don't get it that I always loved school and learning.

This person is important to me, so it stings a bit that they can't get it. I'm not a person who will be happy sitting around clipping coupons and waiting for the grandkids to come by. That sounds like the most boring thing ever.

So it really means so much that you all get it. You get my excitement, you understand the years of waiting and putting other people's needs/wants first.  Thank you for understanding and being excited for me. 

I know pretty much none of you in real life, but this bit of common ground and sharing joy makes me feel so close to all of you. I love you guys. Thanks so much.

I wish there was a "hug" response because that would have been my choice for this post.  The person that doesn't get it right now will in time I bet.  When they see how you are thriving and succeeding and how very happy you are with your choice, they will come around.   In the meantime, you are doing this for you and that is what matters (even though I understand how it stings a bit to hear this person is not supportive).   

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Clarita

Clarita

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1 hour ago, fairfarmhand said:

This seems really silly, but I want you all to know how much it means that you are excited for me. There are some people in my life who are not a fan of this plan. They dont' understand it, they think its a waste of time and effort and can't get why I wouldn't just "retire" when my ds graduates in 3 years when I am 46?  They didn't like school at all and only saw it as a means to an end (a good job) and don't get it that I always loved school and learning.

It's not silly because reading this thread also makes me feel better. Studying is one of my hobbies and it's really nice when you do it with professors/teachers, because you get feedback and progress. I think it also feels different when it's a means to an end vs. something you want to do. At least it was for me (my bachelors was means to an end, my masters was what I wanted to do - in fact it didn't actually do anything for my career). Also you end up studying to further your knowledge instead of just to pass an exam. The retention of the material is much higher (at least in my experience). 

My mom also got her bachelor's when she was older (I was 11). While she was in school she was actually a mentor for a number of her fellow students. My FIL went back to study ancient Hebrew. Clearly for us this going back to school thing is highly encouraged. 

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Laura Corin

Laura Corin

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19 hours ago, regentrude said:

I notice that with my non-traditional students. I think one important factor is that they are going to college because *they* really want to, not because of a parent's expectation. I remember a 40+ y/o with teenage kids  who had owned a grocery store and sold his store in order to pay for college. He kept saying failing is not an option.

The older students tend to do well. Where they're rusty, they compensate with determination. 

Yes. I take evening modules for fun. The mature students who are working towards a degree tend to be focused and able to persevere. The lecturers often say how much they enjoy teaching mature students.

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Halftime Hope

Halftime Hope

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On 8/18/2023 at 4:43 PM, fairfarmhand said:

You guys.

This seems really silly, but I want you all to know how much it means that you are excited for me. There are some people in my life who are not a fan of this plan. They dont' understand it, they think its a waste of time and effort and can't get why I wouldn't just "retire" when my ds graduates in 3 years when I am 46?  They didn't like school at all and only saw it as a means to an end (a good job) and don't get it that I always loved school and learning.

This person is important to me, so it stings a bit that they can't get it. I'm not a person who will be happy sitting around clipping coupons and waiting for the grandkids to come by. That sounds like the most boring thing ever.

So it really means so much that you all get it. You get my excitement, you understand the years of waiting and putting other people's needs/wants first.  Thank you for understanding and being excited for me. 

I know pretty much none of you in real life, but this bit of common ground and sharing joy makes me feel so close to all of you. I love you guys. Thanks so much.

Oh, my goodness. We are your tribe. I'm sorry the person doesn't understand. It's taken me awhile to learn the value of faking interest and joy putting myself in another person's shoes and delighting in what brings them joy even though I'd rather watch paint dry. Could it be that this is such a new experience to them, that they haven't learned that lesson yet?

Anyway, I'm excited for you and hope you have a delightful time as you enjoy the learning and the joy of exciting new experiences.

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JustEm

JustEm

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I once had a family member ask me why I'd want to read through a list of classics. I was so baffled by the question that the only response I could come up with was, why wouldn't you want to. I mean I understand why someone wouldn't want to but it seemed like responding to a dumb question was with an equally dumb question. It is strange to me when people can't comprehend why other people enjoy expanding their understanding and appreciation of things.

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Kassia

Kassia

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29 minutes ago, hjffkj said:

. It is strange to me when people can't comprehend why other people enjoy expanding their understanding and appreciation of things.

Right, and also strange that people you are close to aren't supportive when you're doing something new that you're excited about.  There are lots of things my friends and family do that I would hate, but I love that they are doing things that make them happy.

 

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kbutton

kbutton

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One of my classmates (same major) in college was a mature student going part time who had kids going to college at the same time (and same school). The year I graduated was the year that she finally did. She did great! I loved being in class with her, and we even did a few things outside of class.

Like you, she married and had children young, including grandkids on the way when she was graduating, IIRC. I loved that she wanted to find her thing!

 

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Katy

Katy

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On 8/17/2023 at 10:16 PM, fairfarmhand said:

This semester I’m taking a communications class and an art class. 
 

long term…my goal is to become a marriage and family therapist. Which if you knew my family and some of the dysfunction is kind of ridiculous but I’ve wanted this for so long.

Not ridiculous at all. You'll find most therapists, social workers, and psychologists have some dysfunction in their family of origin. It made them want to figure it out and then help others figure it out. I have a sibling who is a therapist. Also consider social work. I thought it was all foster care, elder care, and hospital situations, but they can work as therapists too. Also some branches of Christianity encourage pastors to get therapy credentials. These are generally the denominations that require a masters degree to become a pastor.

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