Mejane Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 My 19yo nephew and his 18yo gf just became engaged. He works at Walmart, she at Pizza Hut. Both live with their parents, and they have nothing with which to start a life together. I just saw a Facebook post by her with a link to their gift registry. It is an online site to the cruise line where they will honeymoon. We can buy them massages, horseback riding, jet ski rides, etc. I am, frankly, stunned that they, and their parents, think this is the best course regarding gifts with regard to where they are financially. Neither of their parents has the means to "set them up", either. What say you? I will, of course, buy them what they ask for and keep my big mouth shut. Just wondering if I'm totally off-base for thinking this shows really poor judgment on their part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Wow. Like you, I wouldn't not buy them a gift because of it, but I absolutely think it's poor judgement by all parties (including the parents who think this is okay). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess Peach Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I agree with you, but I too would keep my mouth shut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer3141 Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Oh, to be that young and naive again!! :D ITA with you but keep your mouth shut. Life will teach them soon enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forget-Me-Not Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 You're nicer than me. I'd buy them something completely practical and non-returnable, like monogrammed pot-holders :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophia Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Just wondering if I'm totally off-base for thinking this shows really poor judgment on their part. Yeah, it's poor judgement and sad that they don't have more long term vision. Hopefully, their parents or others in their lives can give them some advice ...which of course they may just disregard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gailmegan Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Are you certain they haven't registered somewhere else as well? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Sounds like poor planning and judgment on many levels. I'd keep my mouth shut too, but yikes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Nothing you can do. That's too bad. They are going to be in debt (because it seems to me they are not thinking straight) before they are 20. Maybe you can give some Suzy Orman or other financial planning books as a gift. I think Orman has one specifically geared to young people. I am giving it to my son for his college graduation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gailmegan Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Oh, and I think hubs and I need to get married again. If only these were registry options 13 years ago. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vonfirmath Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 My 19yo nephew and his 18yo gf just became engaged. He works at Walmart, she at Pizza Hut. Both live with their parents, and they have nothing with which to start a life together. I just saw a Facebook post by her with a link to their gift registry. It is an online site to the cruise line where they will honeymoon. We can buy them massages, horseback riding, jet ski rides, etc. I am, frankly, stunned that they, and their parents, think this is the best course regarding gifts with regard to where they are financially. Neither of their parents has the means to "set them up", either. What say you? I will, of course, buy them what they ask for and keep my big mouth shut. Just wondering if I'm totally off-base for thinking this shows really poor judgment on their part. Do their parents think this is okay? I don't remember asking my parents okay before deciding where DH and I would honeymoon, etc. Their parents might be entirely embarassed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollyBee Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Maybe they figure this might be their only chance to take a big fancy trip like this, so they should take advantage of the opportunity? I don't know. I, too, would get them what they registered for and not say anything. We had friends do this exact same thing this fall when they got married, but both are career people in their late 20s early 30s. In which case, it makes more sense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crissy Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 As a parent, I would be 'encouraging' my son to be far more financially stable before starting a family. :) As an aunt, I would buy from their registry and keep my opinion (that you are exaclty right!) to myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janie Grace Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Ridiculous. I'd buy them something practical, from somewhere hard to trace! (Think TJ Maxx, Marshalls, Tuesday Morning, etc.) One day they'll thank you for the toaster! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SproutMamaK Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supertechmom Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. :iagree: Yea it's totally irresponsible and bonehead. But when will they ever get to just run off and have a completely carefree, no worries event again??? We took the simple little honeymoon in a budget place and had a good time but we've never been able to ever again do something just us with no worries. Now a trip alone means arranging care for littles, checking in everyday, making sure the money is right and a thousand other details that never fully let your mind just enjoy the moment. JUst one blow out trip would have been nice when young. However, parents should be encoraging them to not get married with so little resources. Maybe they have a stash set aside? saved all their checks for months???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twoforjoy Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'd keep my mouth shut, but I most likely would buy them something practical. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joysworld Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Maybe they have saved all their money from working and not having to pay rent, utilities etc? Maybe you don't really know if they don't have absolutely nothing to start off with? It would seem that living at home would allow them to save most of their money to be able to buy needed items to start their life with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. You make a good point. We were entirely sensible with our wedding and honeymoon, but soon after that we realized that we could scrape up enough money for a trip to England. We figured it would be our only chance for a long time. We had a wonderful time and sure enough, we've never been able to do it again. I keep hoping though. OTOH, we didn't ask other people to pay for it... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Oh, to be that young and naive again!! :DITA with you but keep your mouth shut. Life will teach them soon enough. :iagree: But, if weddings are still anything like my own, most will just bypass the registry and give them money anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. I will agree with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lily of the Valley Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kokotg Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. :iagree: DH and I were pretty broke when we got married and for the first few years of our marriage (okay, we're still pretty broke)...but I often wish we'd made doing some pre-kid traveling more of a priority and scraped the money together somehow. It only gets harder to justify a splurge on non-essentials every now and then as you get older, add kids and a mortgage, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KristinaBreece Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. Maybe they have saved all their money from working and not having to pay rent, utilities etc? Maybe you don't really know if they don't have absolutely nothing to start off with? It would seem that living at home would allow them to save most of their money to be able to buy needed items to start their life with. ITA with both of these ladies. DH & I won't be able to have the freedom to do that (financially & physically) until both kids are through college. At this point, any *extra* we get goes into retirement & college savings accounts. (Not that there's a whole lot of extra...) We'll be... at least 45 before we can take any sort of extravagant trip alone. (Don't hate me-- 45 is looking like solid middle age from the vantage point of 25.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I think the registry is weird. I've never heard of that. I don't begrudge them a nice honeymoon, but asking others to pay for extras on it just seems odd. I would give money or a practical gift and be done with it. Do you know where they are planning to live after they tie the knot? Hopefully it's not with one set of their parents! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnotherLinda Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I was young and stupid when I got married. We thought we'd have the money to pay for our honeymoon later and charged most of it. (hanging head in shame) Getting into debt was not a smart way to start a new marriage. I guess one way to look at it might be that this young couple can pick up toasters and 9 x 13 pans at garage sales and thrift stores, but they can't just pick up a great honeymoon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. My sentiments exactly. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama2Many4 Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I agree with you that it sounds very immature. I also wouldn't say anything, and get them what they ask for. Are you certain that they don't have funds put aside for the startup of their life together? When my DH and I met he was a landscaper and I worked for Target. We both didn't make much, but had saved enough money to have a decent wedding ($5000) and enough to furnish an apartment. I would just get them what they ask. Maybe they have planned for all the pots and pans, silverware, etc... and just want to have fun on the honeymoon? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Maybe they figure this might be their only chance to take a big fancy trip like this, so they should take advantage of the opportunity? I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. These are my thoughts too. When my first husband and I married, I wanted to go to Disney World. We didn't have much money. We were both college students. We had a roommate because we couldn't afford the rent on our own. I didn't have a big wedding because we couldn't afford it. I got my wedding dress on clearance even though it was only okay and certainly not my dream dress. I had to get married in my sister's living room because we couldn't afford a church and reception. I could only invite 1 couple, some married friends of ours, because her house couldn't hold our families and our friends. That honeymoon meant the world to me. Although I must admit we had some bad times, like running out of money and being unable to afford a last night at a hotel. We had to drive all night to get home. We had to spend some of our food money for a disposable camera because we forgot to bring ours. But still, I have extremely fond memories of that trip. I'm sure my family thought we were crazy. We used our own cash we had saved up and the money his parents gave us as a wedding gift. We felt we deserved a nice trip to celebrate our wedding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myfunnybunch Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Oh, to be that young and naive again!! :DITA with you but keep your mouth shut. Life will teach them soon enough. Life is so different than I imagined it would be when I was 18. I am torn between wishing I'd been more responsible, and being glad that I had the experiences I had. Guess I'd better go with glad, since I can't go back. ;) They'll learn. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Yup. I just give money. I think registries for weddings are kind of weird. I can't remember the last time I went to a wedding where someone gave gifts other than money. Really? I just got remarried last fall and we received a TON of gifts. Just a few checks/money. We didn't register anywhere though. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I was young and stupid when I got married. We thought we'd have the money to pay for our honeymoon later and charged most of it. (hanging head in shame) Getting into debt was not a smart way to start a new marriage. I guess one way to look at it might be that this young couple can pick up toasters and 9 x 13 pans at garage sales and thrift stores, but they can't just pick up a great honeymoon. :iagree: My brother and his wife went into 20K of debt over their had to be fancy wedding and Hawaii honeymoon. Not to mention, they made a poor decision buying a house. It is haunting them to this day while they raise 3 kids. Both MUST work full time and they struggle with any emergency. It's easy to say you should throw caution to the wind, but unless you can do it with cash out of pocket (or your registry if that works for them), I think it shows poor judgment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 :iagree: My brother and his wife went into 20K of debt over their had to be fancy wedding and Hawaii honeymoon. Not to mention, they made a poor decision buying a house. It is haunting them to this day while they raise 3 kids. Both MUST work full time and they struggle with any emergency. It's easy to say you should throw caution to the wind, but unless you can do it with cash out of pocket (or your registry if that works for them), I think it shows poor judgment. Surely there is a middle road though. It doesn't HAVE to be 20K in debt or super frugal practical.... I don't know. I would buy them what they want WITHIN my own financial means. I've never understood the line of thought where young kids like that should only be given 'practical gifts.' People will find a way to eat and pay the bills, but isn't it thrilling to have a little luxury given to you? My mom is one of those who says things like, 'well, I am not going to buy X for them, *I* don't even have one of those!' Bugs me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 (edited) but I wonder if the parents are really supporting it or merely keeping their mouths shut. They may be just cringing inside, but starting to practice those "boundaries" that married American couples expect from their parents. ETA that it's not the honeymoon so much that seems like bad judgment. It's getting married at all when you are both living at home and unable to support yourselves. Edited May 3, 2011 by Danestress Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I think a cruise registry is just plain weird, BUT... I've set up house twice as a young, poor person. I bought cheap stuff and gladly accepted TONS of offers for second hand items. Now I'm 34 with a cabinet full of Target plates and drawers of Target "silver"ware and dollar store cooking utensils. I still don't have any real desire for china or fancy table lamps. And I still haven't taken a fancy cruise. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan in TX Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. :iagree: Dh and I got married when I was 19 and he was just shy of 21. We didn't have much money either. We chose to splurge on our honeymoon, but we didn't ask guests to pay for or gift it too us. But maybe the couple just has different priorities. One can furnish an apartment very cheaply with cast-offs, hand-me-downs, and a few essentials from Wal-mart. You really don't need all the fancy stuff that many people register for when they get married. Susan in TX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacia Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gratia271 Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 My 19yo nephew and his 18yo gf just became engaged. He works at Walmart, she at Pizza Hut. Both live with their parents, and they have nothing with which to start a life together. I just saw a Facebook post by her with a link to their gift registry. It is an online site to the cruise line where they will honeymoon. We can buy them massages, horseback riding, jet ski rides, etc. I am, frankly, stunned that they, and their parents, think this is the best course regarding gifts with regard to where they are financially. Neither of their parents has the means to "set them up", either. What say you? I will, of course, buy them what they ask for and keep my big mouth shut. Just wondering if I'm totally off-base for thinking this shows really poor judgment on their part. I agree with everything you have said. You are not off base; they are likely naive, but life will remedy that soon enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'm going to go the polar opposite direction. I so wish I had done this. We were responsible with our money. We scrimped and saved and bought our home and bought pots and pans and budget furniture and made it all work a in a mature, responsible way. We took a local honeymoon to a place that wasn't particularly romantic, but nice enough. I can't tell you how much I wish that, just for our honeymoon,we'd said to heck with it, thrown caution to the wind and been a little reckless. I will never get that time of my life again, and darnit I want it back. If being reckless and careless is a general way of life that's one thing, but as an isolated incident I'd grin for them and wish them the best. You're only love-drunk newlyweds once. Revel in it a little. :iagree: You can sock away memories of a great trip for a long time. Dinnerware can be purchased at Walmart for 14.99 for a set. I would either give money or something off their registry and realize you will be helping them buy memories that will last a lifetime. "Stuff" is pretty easy to come by. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In2why Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I think the registry is weird. I've never heard of that. I don't begrudge them a nice honeymoon, but asking others to pay for extras on it just seems odd. I would give money or a practical gift and be done with it. Do you know where they are planning to live after they tie the knot? Hopefully it's not with one set of their parents! I think it sounds weird as well. Although nothing should shock me anymore since I see on facebook and blogs where people post that they want to get married or have a child and are raising funds online to make it happen and can you please donate to their "Dream". Maybe I should post back that I am raising money for a dream cruise and ask them to contribute? :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JMDRAD Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 My 19yo nephew and his 18yo gf just became engaged. He works at Walmart, she at Pizza Hut. Both live with their parents, and they have nothing with which to start a life together. I just saw a Facebook post by her with a link to their gift registry. It is an online site to the cruise line where they will honeymoon. We can buy them massages, horseback riding, jet ski rides, etc. I am, frankly, stunned that they, and their parents, think this is the best course regarding gifts with regard to where they are financially. Neither of their parents has the means to "set them up", either. What say you? I will, of course, buy them what they ask for and keep my big mouth shut. Just wondering if I'm totally off-base for thinking this shows really poor judgment on their part. Buy them Dave Ramsey's money program :lol: Looks like they are going to need it!! I was 18 when I got married to my 21 yo E4 soldier. We did not do a wedding registry and we ended up with absolutely EVERYTHING we needed to set up house and about with about $3500 cash... which we sadly blew on our honeymoon.:ack2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Nope. I'd buy them the kinds of newly-wed gifts that you'd get for anyone and completely ignore the dream vacation stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5kidsforME Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Nope. I'd buy them the kinds of newly-wed gifts that you'd get for anyone and completely ignore the dream vacation stuff. :iagree: This. A gift is a gift. You don't have to buy them anything from their registry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 ETA that it's not the honeymoon so much that seems like bad judgment. It's getting married at all when you are both living at home and unable to support yourselves. :iagree: This is the part that screams out to me. Living cheaply is great and even indulging in a luxurious honeymoon if you aren't going be in debt to do it. But I'm pretty sure I won't stand for my kids planning their dream vacation to get married at 18 while they're living under my roof on my dime. Especially if higher ed weren't a major part of the plan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wapiti Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 This. A gift is a gift. You don't have to buy them anything from their registry. :iagree: This is the part that screams out to me. Living cheaply is great and even indulging in a luxurious honeymoon if you aren't going be in debt to do it. But I'm pretty sure I won't stand for my kids planning their dream vacation to get married at 18 while they're living under my roof on my dime. Especially if higher ed weren't a major part of the plan. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crissy Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 :iagree: This is the part that screams out to me. Living cheaply is great and even indulging in a luxurious honeymoon if you aren't going be in debt to do it. But I'm pretty sure I won't stand for my kids planning their dream vacation to get married at 18 while they're living under my roof on my dime. Especially if higher ed weren't a major part of the plan. Exactly. They don't even have a home of their own to return to after the dreamy honeymoon. :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 (edited) I don't think it is any worse than people who register for a $300 toaster or dishes that are $200 per place setting. Edited May 3, 2011 by Nakia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Real life will hit. They will have to grow up. or. not. I wouldn't loose any sleep over it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 Exactly. They don't even have a home of their own to return to after the dreamy honeymoon. :001_huh: Has it been established that they will remain living with parents? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chicagoshannon Posted May 3, 2011 Share Posted May 3, 2011 I'd throw her a "room of the house" shower where everyone is assigned a gift for a particular room of the house. Then follow their registry for the wedding. That way they'll get some practical gifts and stuff they want. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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