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Would you allow your dc to attend a church sponsored weekend event if


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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

 

No!

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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

 

That would be a GIANT NO. What on earth is the reasoning for this???

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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

 

HA! No WAY!

 

ETA: Quite frankly, I'd be shocked if any of the parents went along with this. And the youth pastor shouldn't be in that postion if he's doing stuff like this, IMO.

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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

 

Absolutely not, and I tend to be on the more laid back side on this kind of thing.

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HA! No WAY!

 

ETA: Quite frankly, I'd be shocked if any of the parents went along with this. And the youth pastor shouldn't be in that postion if he's doing stuff like this, IMO.

 

:iagree:

I have to wonder if the youth pastor cleared this with the senior pastors and elders?

It doesn't seem very wise.

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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

 

Not now, not ever. Not if my child were the only one with a mother mean enough to keep them from the cool, *mysterious* destination of spiritual enlightenment. Not if every other idiot adult in the church told me I was overreacting.

 

To quote my 4 year old, "Heck to the no!"

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No. And no group, even a church, should ask this of you in this day and age. It is beyond foolish and short-sighted. Are you just not able to get contact with someone who has the info, or are they intentionally not telling?

 

They are intentionally not telling. It is supposed to be a simulation of the persecuted church.

 

I had no idea this was what would be happening. Ds has been looking forward to the event for months. :mad:

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No way, and that seems really strange. I agree that I wonder if they ok'd it with the pastor. I'd have a word with him. I'd also make sure the other parents knew I wasn't going to let my child go. I think some people might let their child go because of peer pressure even if they thought it was a bad idea. So if they know others are refusing to go along with those rules, they might as well. And if the leadership encounters resistance from several families, they will either change it for this trip, and/or hopefully will not do something like that again.

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They are intentionally not telling. It is supposed to be a simulation of the persecuted church.

 

I had no idea this was what would be happening. Ds has been looking forward to the event for months. :mad:

 

Wouldn't it be fun to call the cops and give them a very authentic "persecuted church" experience? :lol:

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This doesn't even make sense to me. I can understand the simulated persecution idea but there should be some communication to the parents about when/where who is going. You can make it a mystery for the kids without being ridiculous about it. My dh doesn't go places without my knowing where he is much less my child.

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No way, never.

 

They are intentionally not telling. It is supposed to be a simulation of the persecuted church.

 

I had no idea this was what would be happening. Ds has been looking forward to the event for months. :mad:

 

Regarding the above: the parents can know without "ruining" the effect they're going for. I'd be okay with the kids not knowing as long as the parents know everything. Then, as a parent, I can reassure my child and even share some information if that's what's best for my child. IMHO, leadership is wrong to not share everything with the parents.

 

Honestly, I'd be afraid of over-the-top theatrics in this scenario (staged arrests or worse). Kind of along the lines of the slavery and shooter things that have happened at schools.

 

:grouphug: to your ds...this really stinks.

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They are intentionally not telling. It is supposed to be a simulation of the persecuted church.

 

I had no idea this was what would be happening. Ds has been looking forward to the event for months. :mad:

 

That is the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a loooooong time. Who in their right mind is going to let their kid go somewhere with no information? Asinine if you ask me.

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They are intentionally not telling. It is supposed to be a simulation of the persecuted church.

 

I had no idea this was what would be happening. Ds has been looking forward to the event for months. :mad:

 

Not now, not ever. Not if my child were the only one with a mother mean enough to keep them from the cool, *mysterious* destination of spiritual enlightenment. Not if every other idiot adult in the church told me I was overreacting.

 

To quote my 4 year old, "Heck to the no!"

 

:iagree:

 

And I would, at this point, at the very least, insist on knowing each and every thing they had planned. Honestly,though, this is a trust-breaker and a display of bad judgement, so at this point my family would be planning a fun family outing in place of this. And prehaps inviting the ds's best friends to go along.

 

Keeping secrets from the kids isn't OK either. It's asking for trouble.

 

How old is your ds?

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... the leadership (pastors & adult helpers) would not tell you:

 

1) where your child will be,

2) who they will be with (other students or parent/leader), or

3) where they will be staying.

 

I am very, very frustrated and angry. Someone please tell me I am not overreacting. I have never had issue with our youth leadership before, but I'm spitting nails.

 

No! Dh and I teach the teen class at our church. We would never do this. We took a multi-state teen trip last summer and the parents knew where we were every day and had our number to call at any time. My dd is in our group and if I wasn't there I would want to know where she was.

 

 

 

Regarding the above: the parents can know without "ruining" the effect they're going for. I'd be okay with the kids not knowing as long as the parents know everything. Then, as a parent, I can reassure my child and even share some information if that's what's best for my child. IMHO, leadership is wrong to not share everything with the parents.

 

Honestly, I'd be afraid of over-the-top theatrics in this scenario (staged arrests or worse). Kind of along the lines of the slavery and shooter things that have happened at schools.

 

:grouphug: to your ds...this really stinks.

 

:iagree::iagree: There is no way I would let me dd attend a mock scenario like this. She suffers from anxiety and needs to know what's going to happen, plus that kind of scenario would scare her to death.

 

I'm guessing the youth leader is single or young married with no kids? That is the only explanation I can give for this ignorant behavior.

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:grouphug:

 

yuck.

 

not healthy. not safe.

 

so no.

 

your denominations lawyers would be spinning if they knew....

 

accountable ministry, not secretive ministry....

 

pick up the phone. call the senior pastor. and call your presbytery/diocese youth coordinator and ask what you can do at this late date. a permission form has to state where they will be, how they will be getting there, who will be accountable and when they will be returning.

 

oh man....

 

ann

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They are intentionally not telling. It is supposed to be a simulation of the persecuted church.

 

I had no idea this was what would be happening. Ds has been looking forward to the event for months. :mad:

My dh would be on the doorstep, explaining "liability issues" to those who may have forgotten. It's not even just about parental control, it's also about whether this is even a wise thing for the church to do.

 

If they don't budge, my kid would not be going. My dh is in church leadership, and he would also be spending large amounts of time examining why this was ever considered acceptable and who it was that was making such poor decisions. :confused:

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Wouldn't it be fun to call the cops and give them a very authentic "persecuted church" experience? :lol:

 

I love you.

 

:lol:

 

Oh, and no. No, no, no. I would not let them go. And I'm a pretty open-handed, free-range Mama.

Edited by Ipsey
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This is sick. No way. But I want to know the name of your church, honestly, I've seen a lot of lame @$$ dip $h!t youth stuff but this one really deserves an award for the most idiotic, ill conceived notion that stupid youth leaders have EVER come up with.

 

I'll pay for the award myself, all I need is an address.

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Shari, is anyone you know allowing their dc to attend? I can't imagine any parent going along with something so incredibly stupid.

 

And for what possible reason would they want to do a "simulation of the persecuted church???" I can already imagine this whole thing going terribly, terribly wrong.

 

Does your pastor know about this? I would be on the phone immediately to let him or her know exactly what I thought of this ridiculous plan.

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