What age to allow play outside alone?

[Homeschoolmom3]

Granted I live on 8 acres of wooded area and our driveway is about 1/4 mile long to get to the main road.  Wanting to let my 4 1/2 yr. old play outside more but not sure if I can let go yet.  He would be alone without siblings.  I do allow him to play on our porch while I am in the kitchen okay but was wondering at what age would it be okay to let them venture out a bit more, say on our playground.  :)

 

My oldest was SO mature for his age I remember letting him go at about 4 1/2 old and even letting him take his younger brother who was only 2  with him!  Granted I check on them every 10-15 minutes.  My current 4 yr. old is pretty responsible but he is a typical boy, hard to know.  With such a large gap in their ages and starting this phase over again, and now being older I seem to find myself analyzing every decision and at times I feel like I am going nuts!   Thanks for your responses!

[MeaganS]

I allow all my kids outside alone, but we have a standard-sized fenced in backyard. I don't really allow any of them to play outside in the front yard alone, but that's mostly because oldest dd is very immature for her age and our driveway is on a hill right down to the road. Even when I'm out there, I'm constantly having to stop them from riding their various wheeled toys out into the street like little bullets. Our front yard holds little appeal without the wheeled toys, so they would choose the backyard over it without them.

[barnwife]

Well, we have a 5 yo, 3 yo, and 2 yo. They all play outside (generally together) for short periods (5-10 minutes) while DH and/or I are doing other things. FWIW, we live in the country on about 3 acres. 
 

[pehp]

I said 4 or younger, b/c my son started playing outside a bit alone when he was 3 and I was pregnant.  We live in the country on a gravel lane with only one house beyond us.  The rule was you never go near the lane; the other 3 sides of our yard are fenced b/c we live on a farm (cattle beyond the fencing).  Back then I probably did check on him ever 3-5 minutes or so, though.  And we have a lot of windows, and I'd give him a specific area where he'd have to stay so I could see him.  

 

Now that they are 8 and 4, both my children play outside independently anytime they want.  I usually like the dog to stay with them, to ward off unwanted wildlife, but otherwise I don't worry about them.  If we lived in a neighborhood or city w/out a fenced-in yard, my analysis would be quite different.  

[Arcadia]

Are there snakes in your wooded area? One of my aunts used to have a big rural house and my cousins caught lots of snakes.

When cousins and I go further out from the main house, their dogs follow along.

[Desert Strawberry]

At varying levels from age one to four. My four year old has the run of our 8 acres. He isn't allowed in the road, but he's otherwise free to roam.

 

ETA: Luna isn't allowed outside, on the patio alone for even a few minutes, because I worry about coyotes. I haven't seen any of our side of the road, but I know they come onto the aqueduct across the road. D says I'm being paranoid, and he's probably right. but I've always been afraid of coyotes attacking babies. I've heard too many horror stories. Luna is 9 months. 
 

[EKT]

My kids have played outside alone since they were under age 4, BUT we have a townhouse with a very small fenced backyard (tall wooden fence you can't see through) and I am typically on the middle floor, which has windows that look onto the backyard. So, they are outside alone, but never really out of earshot, since our house and yard are so small. 

[Dmmetler]

4-5, but not at certain times of the day-our house is right by a school, and the car line moms are very concerned about unattended little kids, so I made sure I was out with her until she was big enough to look school age (she was very small for her age, so she looked like a 3 yr old at 5).

[kiwik]

In a fenced backyard from walking.

[Homeschoolmom3]

Are there snakes in your wooded area? One of my aunts used to have a big rural house and my cousins caught lots of snakes.

When cousins and I go further out from the main house, their dogs follow along.

 

Well, I haven't "seen" any this year but that doesn't mean we don't have them!  Last year we saw the remains of a snake skin on our deck so they are still probably around.  We do have 2 outdoor cats who occasionally catch a baby one but I only recall one this past season.  Hoping we don't have to worry about that now that winter is coming.  That is probably my biggest concern aside of him possibly falling off of the play set.  He does very well but there is always that chance!  He does like to dig and I am afraid one day might dig in a wrong hole!  :ohmy:  We live in VA woods so we do have copperheads around.  :sad:  

[Heidi]

It just really depends on his maturity.  Is he going to wander off and get lost?  Will he go to the road?  Will he stay around the house if you tell him to?  If he stays around the house, then yeah, I'd let him play outside alone.

[Suzanne in ABQ]

I voted 6yo, but only because of loose dogs.  We live on six acres that are only loosely fenced with barbed wire.  Dogs can easily get onto our property, and have done so.  Our dd was scared of big dogs, and some dogs are prone to attack small scared creatures, so it made me nervous to have her out there alone when she was little.  

 

[Coco_Clark]

In our fully fenced suburban backyard? As soon as they can walk. I keep the door open so I can hear them.

 

In the front yard they can ride their bikes up and down the sidewalk at 5 (what I voted).

[Farrar]

We're in a city without a lot of space. I let them go in the fenced yard around 4 alone but it wasn't much fun. If we had been out in the burbs on a safe street, I might have let them even younger.

 

I also think it's different when there's a real pack of kids. A friend with more than I've got on a block where there's a ton of other kids and parents and a culture of being outside has let her kids be out as young as 1 yo. Of course, not to the same extent as the older kids (getting checked on a lot), but there's always older kids around too.

[Carrie12345]

I don't let my youngest two outside alone.  They need to be together to make enough noise to keep bears away.

Without a wildlife concern, I'd let my 4yo out.  I probably would have at 3, too.

But I have a genuine fear of bears, and they do come through our property.

[Homeschoolmom3]

I don't let my youngest two outside alone. They need to be together to make enough noise to keep bears away.

Without a wildlife concern, I'd let my 4yo out. I probably would have at 3, too.

But I have a genuine fear of bears, and they do come through our property.

Wow! I can understand that! We haven't see any bears at our property but know they have been spotted around several years ago. My concerns are snakes, spiders, and coyotes. Maybe if he was good about staying just in the clearing and not in the woods. Thanks for all your comments! A lot to think on!

[Carrie12345]

Wow! I can understand that! We haven't see any bears at our property but know they have been spotted around several years ago. My concerns are snakes, spiders, and coyotes. Maybe if he was good about staying just in the clearing and not in the woods. Thanks for all your comments! A lot to think on!

 

I should probably worry about snakes, but I don't.  ???

 

About a week ago, we had a mama and 5 cubs coming through the southeast corner of our property while the girls were goofing around in the northwest corner.  It was one of the very few times the girls have immediately obeyed my command to get in the house NOW!  :w00t:

[pehp]

We have coyotes also, but I don't really see them in the daytime--have only seen one here once during daylight hours (at night they are crazy loud).  our dog seems to keep snakes at bay--I never see them in our yard.  But I have found black widows, most notably in the sandbox.  That was a freakout session for me. I have tried to check around under stuff since then, and my kids know what to look for when they see a glossy black spider....still, *shudder*.  We also have bears, but they are shy, and we are in a fairly open spot, so they would be easy to see from a distance. 

 

Our most exciting/scary incident actually involved farm animals.  The bull got into a fight with a neighboring bull, who charged through the fence, and then chased our bull (who was twice his size!) out of the field--I was really disappointed in our wimpy bull--and then our enormous bull came BARRELING through our yard at top speed.  Holy smokes.  We get loose cows sometimes, but they just wander.  A full-speed-ahead bull really frightened me. 

 

 

 

[Tawlas]

I think it depends on the child - you know him best!  How obedient is he?  Does he test limits a lot?  How cautious of a personality does he have?  I was able to let my two year old out alone.  He was very conscientious and cautious by nature.  All of my children have played outside without adult supervision at a very early age without any problems.  I know this isn't always the case for every kid in every location.  I'm also very rural, but we've never had any problems with kids and wildlife of any kind.

 

Except my two year old just licked my arm.  Maybe she spends too much time with our yard dogs?!

[SilverMoon]

I voted for 4 or younger, but this assumes a reasonably fenced yard and a safe neighborhood.

[Homeschoolmom3]

The bull story is crazy!!  Wow!  Glad no one hurt!

 

 

In regards to him being obedient, he normally is and follows directions pretty well.  I think I just need to down my constant fears of the "possible scenarios".  :blush:

[Tsuga]

Granted I live on 8 acres of wooded area and our driveway is about 1/4 mile long to get to the main road.  Wanting to let my 4 1/2 yr. old play outside more but not sure if I can let go yet.  He would be alone without siblings.  I do allow him to play on our porch while I am in the kitchen okay but was wondering at what age would it be okay to let them venture out a bit more, say on our playground.  :)

 

My oldest was SO mature for his age I remember letting him go at about 4 1/2 old and even letting him take his younger brother who was only 2  with him!  Granted I check on them every 10-15 minutes.  My current 4 yr. old is pretty responsible but he is a typical boy, hard to know.  With such a large gap in their ages and starting this phase over again, and now being older I seem to find myself analyzing every decision and at times I feel like I am going nuts!   Thanks for your responses!

 

My situation is a bit different because it wasn't the fences or environment that I was relying on, but other kids. We would let my daughter, 5, and her cousin, 4, and the little one, 3, go out and play in a bit of land that sounds slightly less set back than yours. I let my kids play in the neighborhood and let the little one go around the block by herself at four, and go to the neighbors' houses at three, when we lived in a community in the city.

 

HOWEVER! That was without me. She wasn't really alone. I knew the neighbors, and more importantly, she was never out "alone". There have always been other children outside. Moms with babies, grandmas on benches. When I see a toddler toddling towards a street, I watch out for them; others did the same for my children. They are in a group and they learn safety from the group.

 

If we had aggressive  bears it might be different. I don't know enough about bears to say what I'd do. We do have coyotes but they almost never attack people and they are nocturnal.

 

I'd sooner have a 4 and a 2 year old outside than just the four year old. Four year olds are different when they are responsible for somebody.

[MistyMountain]

I answered 5 for the age I would let them out without a fence or to go to nearby houses of neighbors I trust. I allow my kids to play in a fenced yard earlier.

[Gentlemommy]

We have about 3 acres. It's wooded, with two shallow creeks. I let my kids (4-10) out there alone if they want. From my kitchen window I can see almost to the back edge of the property. They know not to cross the creek (it lines both sides of our property and meets at the back, conveniently forming a natural 'fence'). We live in a subdivision with great neighbors. I feel very safe here. Worst thing is snakes, but they know not to touch any of them and to move away if they see one.

[mellifera33]

I am feeling very alone up in my helicopter after reading this thread. :)

[abba12]

Fully fenced 1 acre yard, mature DD1 has been playing outside since age 3. DD2 joined her when they were 4 and 2.

 

Front yard with noisy, but openable, gate was off limits until DD1 was 4 and DD2 could be with her. Kids are less likely to do silly things when other siblings are around, and at a mature 4 I trusted DD1 not to open that gate and DD2 was too short to do it. Now, DD2 could reach but I am very confident that DD1 would stop her, and the gate is noisy, so it would draw even my attention from inside.

 

My 1yo now plays outside with them, DD1 is old enough to keep an eye on her and call me if anything happens. 

 

Note though, that this is a house with a high fence at the front. It would be different if we just had a general or unfenced front yard. 

[Mommy22alyns]

Our yard is not fenced, and the front slopes down quickly to a one-lane road.  I let the girls out at 6 and 8 together only.

[kristin0713]

6 & 4 together, without me. TBH they are 9 & 7 now and I still prefer they play outside *together*, not alone.

[Reefgazer]

I answered 6, with the caveat that there is no water (ponds) on the property within easy reach, and providing your child will reliably follow directions not to go past whatever boundary you set.

[Kerileanne99]

I let my dd5 go out in the fenced yard when she was about 4. She would also open the gate and go around to the open garage where we have a climbing wall, monkey bars, trapeze, and the like. Since we live in a fairly busy corner by a university, I do tend to have more rules about where/when she can do that.

 

Also, since she is essentially still an only child (for play purposes baby bro doesn't count!), she wants to be out but gets a bit lonely. I bought walkie-talkies so she can just 'check in' and she knows I am close. At 4 she used these more, but at 5 much less so. .

[FawnsFunnyFarm]

I consider myself a "free range parent".  They probably have all been out without me from about 3 or so.  We live in the country on a private road and border several thousand acres of forest.  My kids do tend to stay close, but they do explore the woods closest to our home, where they have a tree house built and several other forts they have constructed without adult help.  They are taught from really early on the dangers we have here... snakes (both copperheads and rattlesnakes can be found here but we have never seen either on our own land... just lots of black snakes, racer snakes, garter snakes and the like), coyotes (though they are rarely seen during the day), bears (again we don't see them often but they do visit our yard/woods), and the occasional bobcat.  My 3 younger kids (oldest is about grown now) stay together outside for the most part, they know what to do if they see any of the dangerous animals, they know not to eat the berries except off the plants we have shown them, etc.

 

If we lived in town or even on a busy country road, I probably wouldn't be so free with them.

[....]

I am feeling very alone up in my helicopter after reading this thread. :)

 

Don't feel bad.  I consider myself a very free-range parent, but I won't let my 8 yro or 10 yro girls outside alone.  We live within eyeshot of the #1 trafficking highway in north america and there are constant abduction attempts in our area.  What age you let your children do stuff is entirely dependent on the safety of the situation and the kid.

[Guest Kaity]

We live on a suburban cul-de-sac, have a fenced backyard, and my kids tend to play in pairs, so I feel comfortable letting the boys play outside pretty early. I've left them to play in the backyard since they were toddlers, and start letting them out front without me around age 4 or 5.  

[Sahamamama]

In our old neighborhood, not at all, ever. I didn't feel safe out there, forget about leaving a toddler in the yard.

 

When we moved here two years ago, the girls were 8.5, 6.5, and 6.5. It took a while for me to relax enough to let them play out back, and they still have to stick together. No one is allowed out alone. If one comes in, fine. If two come in, they all come in. If they go from the front to the back (or vice versa), I need to know, so I have an idea of where they "should" be. No wood pile (spiders), no hill by the neighbor's house (he's an unknown variable), and at least ten feet back from the fence with the thoroughbreds (neighboring farm). The horses are nice to look at, but a bit nippy and they kick. Other than that, go outside and play!  ;)

[Holly]

I think there are many factors that play into this.  What is your yard like, area you live in (urban, suburban, rural, small town, etc.), traffic, maturity of child, how well can you see/hear them from inside, etc.  I don't have a set age where they can play outside alone.  

 

I let my 5 (soon to be 6) yo outside with siblings or if I can keep an eye on her from the dining or kitchen.  If I'm not able to watch her closely or her siblings aren't with her, she's not allowed outside.  We currently live on an acre in the country, but the road by our house is 55mph (which means people drive 60+).  Fortunately, it's up-hill going to the road and they stick to the far back of our property or on the back patio.  Previously we lived in a small town, but on a busy road and I had no good windows to watch them through.  I didn't let my then 7yo out without an older sibling.    

[Mergath]

For us it had a lot more to do with location than age. Dd wasn't allowed outside alone at our last place ever. It was a tiny, unfenced yard on a busy alley near a twenty-four hour gas station, with multiple level three sex offenders living within a few blocks. 

 

We now have a big yard that sits on the border between a small rural town and the country. Our neighbors are either elderly people who dd likes to visit or families with kids (two with parents who are first responders) so here, dd pretty much has the run of the neighborhood as long as she lets me know where she's going to be. We pretty much live in freaking Mayberry now. :P Yesterday dd helped an elderly neighbor weed her garden and rake leaves, then ran off to play with her friends. Here, I would have let dd alone out into the yard probably at three or four.

[Homeschoolmom3]

I let my dd5 go out in the fenced yard when she was about 4. She would also open the gate and go around to the open garage where we have a climbing wall, monkey bars, trapeze, and the like. Since we live in a fairly busy corner by a university, I do tend to have more rules about where/when she can do that.

 

Also, since she is essentially still an only child (for play purposes baby bro doesn't count!), she wants to be out but gets a bit lonely. I bought walkie-talkies so she can just 'check in' and she knows I am close. At 4 she used these more, but at 5 much less so. .

 

Walkie-talkie great idea!  Why didn't I think of that!?! 

[Homeschoolmom3]

I let my dd5 go out in the fenced yard when she was about 4. She would also open the gate and go around to the open garage where we have a climbing wall, monkey bars, trapeze, and the like. Since we live in a fairly busy corner by a university, I do tend to have more rules about where/when she can do that.

 

Also, since she is essentially still an only child (for play purposes baby bro doesn't count!), she wants to be out but gets a bit lonely. I bought walkie-talkies so she can just 'check in' and she knows I am close. At 4 she used these more, but at 5 much less so. .

 

Walkie-talkie great idea!  Why didn't I think of that!?!   -  Sorry duplicate post!

[BooksandBoys]

I have allowed my children time alone in our fenced backyard since before age 2 (with me checking very frequently) abs at age 2 on with me checking abou every 10 minutes. I do stay in earshot because my three boys can get a little crazy. I keep my backyard safe (no hammers etc.), and our privacy fence is locked.

 

They wont be allowed in the front yard without supervision for a very long time...for many reasons.

[EKS]

Fully fenced suburban yard--four or younger.

 

Unforced, eight acre, heavily wooded lot--six or so.

[LucyStoner]

With or without older sibling or cousin?

[LucyStoner]

Come to think of it, it wasn't so much a when I would allow it situation as when they were even willing/interested. My older son with ASD started going to the park across the street from our old house around 7 and he rode his bike all around by age 9. Before that, he would want me to be no further away than the room adjacent to our tiny yard. That was an urban area a block off a major street.

 

When my older son was 9 and just before my younger son turned 4 we moved to an apartment complex which has a playground. My 6 year old son COULD go there alone but WILL NOT go there alone. He will go with his brother or a cousin (ages 9 and 13). He will want me to walk him to them if they are already out there. I am encouraging him to do it alone sometimes. This is in a sleepy suburb.

[Southern Ivy]

We have a well fenced in yard; so I have, a few times, let my 3 yr old play outside for a few minutes at a time. I may go inside to change out the laundry quickly, to change my clothes, use the bathroom, or something similar. If have work to do in the kitchen, I let her play outside longer since I can see her through the windows. 
I'm still rather skittish when I do this, though. 

 

We live in a safe, rural community and there are many "free-range" parents here. Kids are roaming all over and playing in everyone's yard. It's just the culture of the town, so I think that gives me a small sense of security.
If we lived in a more suburban or less savory area, she would not be allowed outside at all without supervision.

[Junie]

I am feeling very alone up in my helicopter after reading this thread. :)

 

Me too.

 

None of my dc go outside without me.

 

If ds15 and dd13 were my only children, yes, I would let them play outside together.  But, if they go out, the whole gang wants to go out.

 

Are ds15 and dd13 mature enough to watch the others?  Yes.  But, going outside would then be babysitting and no longer fun.  So, I go out with them.

 

If we had a fenced yard, things would be much different.  As it is, unfortunately, we don't go out as often as we should.

[umsami]

We do not have a fenced yard, and live in a neighborhood with a lot of traffic.

 

I'm comfortable letting them around 7 and up outside alone.  My son who is five can go out with his siblings, but not alone.  

 

If we lived up north, with a fenced yard and no fire ants, etc., I'd be comfortable around 4-5. 

[Tammyla]

Couldn't vote...

 

Depends on the child and where outside.

[vonfirmath]

In a fenced backyard, with her 7 year old brother -- age 3.

 

In a fenced backyard by herself -- 4

 

In the front yard? I am STARTING to think I might let my 8 year old by himself out there. Maybe 9?

[KSinNS]

So we live on a busy street and don't have a fence. My current 5 yo started going out with sibs around 4. The 2 year old gets mad, but needs an adult to go with him. The other kids are great, but they can be in their own little worlds, and might not notice him going into the street. That being said, D or T couldn't have gone out alone that young (4). They'd have got hit by a car for sure. Plus, I've spent lots of time on road safety since they were small (never chase a toy into the street, stay on the sidewalk, etc.)

[katilac]

Alone would concern me more than being a specific age - if something happens, there is no one to go for help. So, I'd be very open to a 4-yr-old playing in a more open area, where I could see him from the house or by stepping onto the porch, than I would be to him playing in a wooded area where there are more dangers and he is harder to see. 

 

Our backyard at home is fenced in, and they could go anywhere visible to the sliding glass door from a very young age alone. Our camp in the woods has some ravines and dangerous animals, so we still prefer them to be together unless they are planning a fairly short walk. When they were younger, they used to carry a whistle (the kind on a breakaway lanyard). 

 

If your playground is visible from the house, I'd vote yes. If it's not, would it be possible to invest in a low-end camera kit? Maybe a couple aimed at the areas he is allowed to play, and one aimed at the driveway. 

 

We've had one for years, and I love having it.

 

We can see who is knocking at the door and ignore the salespeople and religious proselytizers (the images play on the tv). 

 

When the kids were little, we could keep an eye on what they were up to in the backyard. Now that they are teens, we can still keep an eye on what they're up to in the backyard (I host a teen social night, the cameras are very valuable, lol). 

 

One year, mama bird built a nest right in front of one of the cameras, and we watched the babies grow up on the bird cam!

 

If the areas you want him to play in aren't easily visible from a window, the cameras could save you a lot of walking outside to check on him. 

 

 

[Melissa in Australia]

we are rural. We have a fully fenced. safe play area right off the veranda. The kitchen door is also the outside door. over the kitchen sink is a large window overlooking the whole play area. My kids would start playing out there at around age 2 while I washed dishes etc. inside.