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BooksandBoys

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About BooksandBoys

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    Hive Mind Queen Bee

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  1. Oh, this is an amazing discovery!! So glad you are feeling better. I have to eat plenty of protein each day or I start feeling awful, and even with that, I take an iron supplement daily (who knew that exhaustion the last two years was low iron? I didn’t.) and a methylated B complex every other day to keep my energy at reasonable levels (mind you, I’m not energetic, just not exhausted).
  2. My middle guy was diagnosed with severe anxiety (and adhd) when he was 5. We started with intuniv, which lessened the constant physical movement and improved the anxiety. At 6, we did a full evaluation and an autism and an “almost depressed” diagnosis were added. Adding Celexa to the intuniv took the anxiety down another notch and he now enjoys trying some new things and is not constantly paralyzed by anxiety. He has also had therapy (a combo of CBT and ABA) since we was 5. He’s really doing so well. Youngest was just diagnosed with the whole pile too (autism, anxiety, depression, and adhd, he’s 5). While we wait for an appointment with the psychiatrist, I have the pediatrician prescribing intuniv. His anxiety seems to have lessened markedly. He’s having fewer meltdowns and seems to be doing much less worrying out loud, so I suspect he’s worrying less in his own head too. I don’t know what the psych will suggest. He starts therapy this week.
  3. I’ll send you lots of hugs too. The child I grieve was born 8 years ago on Mother’s Day, so that day and his birthday are painful for me. The dreams, the hopes, the expectations (even little ones like that a baby eventually sleeps through the night - he didn’t until he was 7, and it’s still only half the nights) were quickly shattered. I believe all of mine (all three boys diagnosed ASD etc) will eventually be stable in some form of employment (emotional regulation is another story), but the getting there, the therapies, the financial burden, the heartache, the homeschooling (we tried school for youngest this year and it was a disaster due to behaviors he’d never had at home), they all might take me down with them. Hugs
  4. We had success using lanolin as a cream for eczema before we fully identified the foods that were causing it (gluten and dairy for youngest, peanuts for me). We have not had trouble with soaps in general here (though we always use the dye free versions of things because we avoid all artificial dyes for behavioral reasons). Sorry I can’t help more. Keep looking for those foods! It can take a full month for things to completely clear your body, but it’s worth it to feel better (at least it’s been worth it to me).
  5. Get youngest up, dressed, fed, brushed, and off to school (done- it was a tough morning) Get other two and self ready to go Older two participate in an fMRI study about sensory integration pick up youngest go back to get older guys lunch school work exercise fold all the laundry, put it away de-escalate any meltdowns that occur psych paperwork dinner Bedtime for kids, insurance paperwork for me
  6. #EndParentShaming was THE description that caught my eye. I’m so tired of the parent expectations. I might just be raw and tired, but darn if I didn’t YET again just get a psych who wanted me to know that “learning how to create structure, be gentle but firm, and use some ABA techniques” may be enough to resolve most of my youngest’s challenges. This psych had just diagnosed said youngest child with ASD2 (and anxiety, depression, and ADHD) and was arguing with my comment that we’d be immediately pursuing meds as well as ABA and an IEP at school. I just wanted to smack him. I mean, sure, his bias might be anti-meds. And sure, we aren’t perfect parents by any definition. There’s always more to learn. But we have two other sons on the spectrum, so he wasn’t talking to rookies who know nothing about structure and ABA. What we’ve been doing isn’t working. We are structured. We are firm. We are gentle. We ABA the HECK out of our kids. I need more help. Your bias isn’t helpful here, man.
  7. Yep. I hate Mother’s Day. It happens to be the day that my life flipped completely upside down and many years later shows no signs of righting itself. I hate the reminder that I used to enjoy being a mom. It’s not socially acceptable to say that either. In fact, I should probably delete this entire comment.
  8. Pathological demand avoidance was the first diagnosis I ever found that fit my DS2. That it’s something of a form of autism in Britain (if I’m remembering correctly) was what allowed me to consider that an autism evaluation was worth seeking for him. Things that have reduced his demand avoidance include getting meds dialed in, ABA so I’m not the only person in his life making demands (others avoid because it’s too hard), and keeping his sensory stuff balanced (lots of exercise, especially in the pool, lots of joint pressure, lots of sunshine, lots of quiet time with a book or his sketch book.
  9. We use Intuniv here for DS2, who is combined type ADHD, huge emphasis on the H (motor and sensory disregulation) with ASD and anxiety. It helps calm him physically, also reduces his anxiety a bit (perhaps because he’s physically calmer), but I’d say it had zero effect on his impulsivity. And he can’t take traditional ADHD meds because they make him wicked violent, so at this point, it’s all therapy for the impulsivity. OP, I waited too long to medicate my kiddos, and we started DS1 at age 8. I tried all the other things, desperately and patiently to no avail. It wasn’t until we started ADHD meds that he was able to start to learn routines. He has severe ADHD and is an aspie. He reports that the meds make him “less funny,” but he likes everything else about them (he’s 11 now, so it’s been 3 years). He takes an ER version, the lowest dose we can manage so there’s less impact on appetite, but the hours before and after efficacy are useless around here. Any focus is gone. I structure our days so he can mostly read or play Legos (both high interest for him) after meds wear off. I wish we’d started earlier. He can play with his brothers and friends on meds. He can’t do it without. There are so many things he can do on meds (ski, bike, run, swim, math, Boy Scouts) that he loves I much but can’t do safely or effectively without meds. Not to mention the telling him 14 times to start moving the toothbrush in his mouth after already telling him 12 times to walk to the bathroom. 😂
  10. This is the part where you relocate to me and we buy one to share.
  11. I use mine every day in the fall/winter/spring and occasionally in the summer if I’m stuck inside or just feeling blah, but I’m pretty sensitive and don’t like feeling crappy. 🙂 I’m a big fan of using whatever helps me feel better.
  12. Why do you think you’ll get slammed with taxes if you file Married Filing Separately? You only claim your income in that case, not half of your joint income.
  13. Yes. ASD is all through one side of my children’s family. A great-uncle, an uncle, likely their father, maybe their grandfather (at least severe adhd) and, if I’m correct, their grandmother and great-grandmother). It explains so much about the challenges all of these people have in their relationships, school, their jobs, their relationships (oh, I said that already :-). The narcissism thing, though. It’s interesting to me. Because, if you don’t know what autism is, but you’ve heard of narcissism, I think it can look a little like narcissism. Bear with me. Consider the idea that people with HFA struggle with theory of mind and seeing the perspective of other people and consider how that could look like narcisism to someone who doesn’t understand autism. I wish we could diagnose more adults. I wish more adults were open to diagnosis. Because the adults in our own lives would still benefit from supports in some aspects of their lives. I’m not saying this well. My DH is slowly considering the idea that he is on the spectrum (he decided his brother and uncle were many years ago). But, what I’m not seeing yet are the skilled job counselors for adult HFAs and the marriage counselors who understand adult HFA. And, just straight up regular counselors who understand adult HFA. These exist, I’m sure, but I’d love to see it expand to actually be accessible.
  14. Fascinating. I’ve had several new acquaintances ask what country we’ve moved from after they meet my oldest. But, he doesn’t have any obvious speech challenges (passes speech evals with flying colors), it’s just something about the cadence/slight alteration in sound production. edited to add: my oldest aspie failed his nuchal fold test...thanks for sharing that budding research.
  15. I have a Charge 2 and love it. It’s still going strong after 2 years of everyday use, though I’ve replaced the bands with aftermarket bands twice? Maybe three times? Battery life is excellent. When I’m running a lot, it lasts 4-5 days. When I’m less active (so, just counting steps not tracking exercise), it’ll last a week. It charges quickly. Notifications (I turn these off, but they exist), heart rate, sleep, syncs with other apps, though I haven’t checked that it syncs with Apple Health (I’m sure it does). This style is not waterproof, only water resistant, though others are. I like the size (a bit more than an inch wide) because it doesn’t completely take over my wrist, but I can easily read all the info.
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