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S/O What kind of mom are you? UPDATED to add the list


Learning fun
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Of the animal models ( tiger, dolphin, elephant, jellyfish, ?) what kind of mom do you consider yourself to be? What kind of mom do others consider you to be? How has this affected the way you educate your children?

 

I'll go first 🙂. I see myself being a mix of elephant and dolphin, but I suspect others see me as a jellyfish. What this looks like educationally is the early years everything was play or snuggle based. Dd's preschool life was filled with children's museums, aquariums, story hour, games and anything we could do while we snuggled. Now she's in a whole child charter school that values recess and teaches mindfulness along with the three R's. We after-school using audio books, math songs, and snuggle fest read alouds. The dolphin side shows up with the daily 30 min instrument practice and her preprofessional ballet class (both activities which she chose and likes but doesn't have the work ethic to pursue without my support). I think others see me as a jellyfish mom primarily because of my gentle discipline style. I focus more on relationship building than punishments and corrections. It helps that my Dd has a compliant and rule following personality so it's super easy to be gentle.

 

So now it's your turn 🙂

 

Oh I forgot to describe the list! So in a very simplistic nutshell

 

Tigers- value success and accomplishment above all else

 

Dolphins- value success and accomplishment balanced with the well being and happiness of the child.

 

Jellyfish- let the children be free to be who they are and do what they want

 

Elephants- Value relationships the most. Does the child feel safe and loved?

Edited by Learning fun
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I need a list too.  I might consider myself a sloth because I expected my kids to do all the work (school work) on their own.  But that critter doesn't work for the discussions we had about what they had learned, etc.

 

FWIW, I never homeschooled the elementary years, so no, I didn't expect them to pick up a pencil and learn to write on their own.  ;)

 

As a family I suppose we're more like a pack of wolves.  Hubby and I are Alphas, but the whole pack participates and has value.  We're a team.  

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I don't know. I am a permissive parent so I guess I'm a jellyfish but that sounds so derogatory and doesn't fit who my kids are as young adults. We mostly lived a radical unschooling type life, until we got to high school when school became mandatory. But I still let my kids make all their decisions while I was there to give them all the options. I let them self-regulate with food and electronics, two things that other parents usually attach rules to. I very rarely said no to them. If I could make something happen, I did. If they wanted a fast food hamburger at 9:00pm, we got in the car to go. None of my children have grown up feeling entitled. They don't feel a need for things. They're all frugal with their money and make wise financial decisions. They don't take crazy risks. I don't think my permissive parenting was a detriment to their lives.

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Oh I forgot to describe the list! So in a very simplistic nutshell

 

Tigers- value success and accomplishment above all else

 

Dolphins- value success and accomplishment balanced with the well being and happiness of the child.

 

Jellyfish- let the children be free to be who they are and do what they want

 

Elephants- Value relationships the most. Does the child feel safe and loved?

Edited by Learning fun
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When I hear the term "jellyfish mom," I think about a mom who's looming ominously around the house, and you'd better stay on her good side or those stinging tentacles will get you!

 

The kids are agreed that I'm a mix between tiger and dolphin, with an occasional smattering of jellyfish in the above sense.

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I think the OP makes a great point about the personality of her ds fitting really well with her parenting style. I'd like to be a dolphin, but my youngest ds is forcing me to be a jellyfish. There is just no standing in that guy's way to lead or direct, it's all intrinsic dynamo. My third ds is elusive but somewhat compliant when I can track him down. I feel like I'm a jellyfish there, too. 

Edited by wintermom
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Maybe Dophin?

The dolphin description seemed more “touchy feely†than my personal tastes. I don’t want my kids to be chronically miserable, but I am a big proponent of natural consequences that sometimes leaves the child temporarily disappointed as a way of teaching a lesson. Suck it up, cupcake, and make better decisions next time.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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I'm sorry, but no.  You've already chosen to be an owl.  ;)

 

I thought about that after I posted - I don't use this username in many places so I forgot it was here.  :lol: The owl thing was my oldest's decision - she assigned favorite animals to everyone in our family.

 

But I can be an owl mom. That works for me.  :coolgleamA:

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This sounds a lot like the DISC profile to me, which is maybe why I can't answer. I would guess that Tiger = D, Jellyfish = I, Elephant = S, and Dolphin = C. I test as almost indistinguishable and high in C, D, and S on that assessment, lol! My I is basically non-existant. 

 

Dolphin is probably the closest thing to what resonates with me. 

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 I push all my children to be the best they can in everything - I don't think that I can be categorised into one of those groups. 

 

What do you do if they are the best at annoying their brothers and sisters?  :laugh:  My 13 ds outshines our gang in this category. It's completely intentional, too.  :cursing:  

 

I do remember reading something about "transformational leadership" a few years ago. I wonder if that would work with teenagers?

Edited by wintermom
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If someone asked I'd say dolphin because, duh, that's the obvious best.  BALANCE.

 

But honestly, I'm all, just like most moms, maybe leaning towards jellyfish.

 

I push all my children to be the best they can in everything - I don't think that I can be categorised into one of those groups. 

 

Isn't that the definition of a Tiger mom?
 

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