Mononucleosis - experience?

[YaelAldrich]

So it's the first day of Hanukah (Merry Christmas to all who celebrate) and my oldest son just got diagnosed with mononucleosis.  We thought he had strep, but I changed my mind on Friday when he felt no better after day of Zithromycin.  He's dead to the world - has been sleeping since Thursday afternoon with short, short wakeups to eat chicken soup (1x day) and tea and water (3x day).  His lymph nodes on his neck are gigantic, is feverish and has the worst throat/tonsils ever - he can hardly breathe.

 

How long will I expect him to be out of commission.  My husband thinks he can go back to school tomorrow (!).  I wonder will he miss enough school (a private school) that he will fail the semester?  He is the center for their small basketball team and I don't think they have an alternate (and he is the tallest guy on the team).

 

Any advice or suggestions?  Help!!!  :svengo:

 

And my daughter (10) starting throwing up last night.  Just gave her a little liquid after not vomiting for a couple of hours.  Nopes - threw it right back up.

 

My other two kids are whining they are BORED and we won't let them play with their friends right now.

 

Whoopie!

[Mergath]

I had mono when I was a teen. I was out of commission for weeks. My sore throat got so bad that I couldn't even swallow fluids and by the time my mom could be convinced to bring me to the ER you could pinch the skin on my body and it would stay like that. I was in the hospital for four days. Mono isn't something to fool around with. In all probability, he's going to be out for at least another week, likely more, and if you push him too hard he could get really sick. Check him for dehydration and bring him in for IV fluids if he needs them.

 

Also, if I remember correctly, you aren't supposed to play sports for some time after you get mono because you can rupture your spleen, so his basketball team is going to have to figure something else out.

[maize]

He's going to have to take it easy for a long time--mono does not get better if you push yourself.

[maize]

Happy Hanukah to your family, I am so sorry that you are not all up to celebrating! Being sick for a holiday is no fun.

[Joules]

Weeks!  It was six weeks for me.  My hale hearty teen neighbor who cut our grass and ran track had it a few years ago.  Only three weeks for him, but his activity was restricted after.  There are some serious complications from mono, so whatever you do, don't push him to do anything until he is ready.  Also, sometimes teens aren't good judges of what they can do, and you'll have to put some restrictions on.

 

Mergath is right about the spleen.  I don't know if it is a blanket recommendation or if they do it based on the swelling, but it's not a chance I'd want to take.

 

You can't do much to help except make him comfortable.  It just has to run its course.  When he rousts up, get something to drink in him and a few bites of food or soup.  I slept almost solid for two or three weeks and lost a ton of weight.  If he's already skinny and this goes on long, you may have to encourage something like protein drinks when he is awake.

[CadenceSophia]

I would set your base expectation to sleeping for a week, resting for up to 20 days. Hopefully he will be better than that but mono can be really bad. I had it as a three year old (which is apparently wildly rare) and it was several weeks. My mom just had it in the spring and she was down about 6 weeks and weak for another month. He should not be encouraged (or maybe even allowed) to restart sports a soon as he can make it to school. It can just take a long time to get back stamina.

[maize]

This article suggests 2 weeks to 2 months for recovery.

 

Surely the school can work with you so he doesn't fail his classes? Most schools will make accommodations for sickness. If he is near the end of a term he may need to take an "incomplete" grade and catch up when he is able.

http://www.healthline.com/health/mono#Recovery7

[AFwife Claire]

Yeah, my ds15 had a very similar sickness to mono (just not the Epstein-Barr virus, but similar), and he was sick for awhile.  He got sick the first week or July, and it was about a month before his throat stopped hurting.  He lost 15 pounds!  He slept for weeks.  It really took him a long time to bounce back.  When cross-country season started in August, he was definitely not remotely close to where he usually is, fitness-wise.  The sickness just wiped him out.  It was into September before I felt he was really recovered.  

 

Your son definitely needs to rest and not push himself to be able to fully recover.  I pray it will be a quicker recovery for him!  

[Night Elf]

I agree with the others. This could last weeks. My oldest dd slept a great deal the first two weeks. She also lost some weight because she didn't feel like eating. Then she was very lethargic for the next two weeks, but didn't sleep as much. She felt weak after too much exertion for a couple of months. I can't imagine trying to play a sport. I'm sorry to say, but I think your DH is being overly optimistic. This isn't a 24 hr. bug.

[Melissa in Australia]

I think what you guys call mono is the same as what we call glandular fever. My brother had it when he was 14. He was very very ill for 2 months then got chronic fatigue and it took 5 years for him to function normally after that. He was so ill that he could no longer go to school at all. My mum tried corespondents school but my brother really struggled to stay awake. It ended up that my father put him on as an electrical apprentice at age 15 with flexible working hours around his illness.

[SparklyUnicorn]

School tomorrow?  Uh no.  I was sick for three months.  I did go to school on and off during that time, but not right away and it was EXTREMELY difficult.  I had a note from a doctor basically saying it was ok if I fell asleep during class.  They gave me steroids for the throat pain which is worse than any throat pain I ever had.

It's pretty awful.   Sorry to hear he is sick.

 

 

[MEmama]

DH had mono as a teen and was out of comission for months. He missed swim season and a full season of lacrosse.

 

Agreeing with others, your DH is going to have adjust his expectations.

 

I'm sorry you are going through this, and right at your holidays. :(

[mumto2]

I had it my first semester at college. I was so very ill. I went home for two weeks and returned to school and finished my semester and year. It was an academic and health disaster. I should have withdrawn and went to the local community college for the rest of the year. For the next few years I had mono several more times, basically stress did it to me. I have never been the same. I did manage to recover my grade point average but my first semester grades were dismal.

 

School tomorrow no way. Maybe after New Year. No sports for several months as I remember. Personally I would consider his basketball season over. I just wouldn't add anything extra. Just functioning is going to be hard for a couple of months.

[Lady Marmalade]

I missed two MONTHS of school when I had mono as a teen.  Everyone thought I'd moved or transferred to another school.

 

I also got a pass to get out of phy ed for the entire school year- that was the BEST year of school ever.  I went to the gym every day for class for attendance, and then spent the rest of the hour in the library happily reading.  I did do the bowling unit, so actually went to class for those three weeks, but the rest of the year I had that glorious pass. 

 

I had the really wretched sore throat also.  It was so bad that I would lie on my side with tissues under my face because I would let the drool run out my mouth instead of swallowing.  After a couple of days of my sleeping and not drinking anything, I started hearing mom on the phone with doctors and other people, discussing when to take me to the hospital.  THAT terrified me more than anything.  I asked her to figure out a way to get some medicine in me, so she crushed up some aspirin or Tylenol in some grape jello and I cried and sucked that down.  A few hours later I was finally feeling relief in my throat enough that I sat and chugged a very large glass of water- all while cringing and holding onto a pillow for dear life.  That was the most painful glass of water ever.  I slept after that, but when I woke I was able to swallow pills and after a few days of taking painkillers and keeping the fluids going, the pain in the throat subsided.  My first real meal in over a week was six little radiatore pasta nuggets with a dribble of red sauce. I think my mom actually cried when I asked for a small portion of dinner.

 

Mono is no joke.  Pushing through the tiredness doesn't work, it makes it worse.  You really just need to rest and sleep and the day will come when the energy will have suddenly returned.  Even then though, plan to take it easy for a good month after that. The kidneys and liver can be swollen for a full year after mono as well, so care should be taken with physical activity for a long time. 

[Murphy101]

One of my boys got mono his freshman year of college and it totally knocked him on his rear for a good 4 months. And it was almost a year before he was 100% again. He dropped one college class and slumped through three others with B or C grades and reduced his pf work hours by half. He slept every single moment he wasn't in class or at work. He was miserable but too damn stubborn to cut back more.

 

Take it serious. It really is dibilitating and can be prolonged for many people. And the harder they try to push through it, it can it can end up dragging it out.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I have never been the same .

Yeah, I got a very bad case of mono with complications over 30 years ago. That was the start of my chronic illness. I wish that I had not pushed myself. I wish that I had parents to advocate for me (but they were thousands of miles away).

 

OP- did he actually get tested for mono? I got a bit confused by you saying that you decided he had mono.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Best wishes for a speedy recovery for him! Like Jean, I can date the onset of my chronic illness to my bout with mono when I was 13. Ask the doctor for recommendations about rest, nutrition, what to watch for, when to resume activities...I hope he'll have a mild case.

[itsheresomewhere]

Let him rest as much as possible. I have a very sweet friend who has several issues from pushing herself through mono instead of taking it easy as told. She will tell you how much she wishes she had followed advice and taken it slow.

[umsami]

Happy Hanukkah.  I'm sorry your son is going through this.

 

No, no to school tomorrow.  I would expect him to miss at least two weeks of school minimum, but probably more.  He should not fail the semester, though.  I had pneumonia in fourth grade, and missed the last 3 months.  My teacher just came to my house once a week or twice a week to keep me up to speed.  I would contact his teacher, and find out what needs to be done.  I would push for the minimum, though, as he will not have the energy to do much sadly.

 

As others have said, do not push him...it will not help.

[Bluegoat]

I had mono my last year of university, for most of the final semester, though we only figured it out as exams were coming up.  By the time I was at the point your son is now, I was somewhat recovered in about 3 weeks - enough to pass in school work though not do a good job at it.

 

My sister lots a whole high school semester when she had mono.

 

Your usband is bein very optimistic.

[Cinder]

Ds1 recently had mono--confirmed by blood test. The doc told him he was contagious for 7 days from the onset of symptoms. He got a steroid shot for pain and slept a lot. He felt a lot better after 7 days but didn't fully recover for another week or so.

[trulycrabby]

He absolutely should not attend school tomorrow. Poor kid, I hope he has a relatively mild case. :grouphug:

 

Shalom Hanukkah!

[Luckymama]

Chag sameach!

 

Let the boy rest a few more days. Is he feverish? Does he look like he's actively engaging in activities?

 

I had mono freshman year if college right before finals week (mid-May?). I wasn't cleared to do anything until right after July 4.

[itsheresomewhere]

Make sure you get a note from the doctor for his school if you didn't get one.

[YaelAldrich]

Yeah, I got a very bad case of mono with complications over 30 years ago. That was the start of my chronic illness. I wish that I had not pushed myself. I wish that I had parents to advocate for me (but they were thousands of miles away).

 

OP- did he actually get tested for mono? I got a bit confused by you saying that you decided he had mono.

No, I fancy myself a pretty good diagnostician (both of cars and people :lol: )!  He got a rapid mono test on Sunday morning after me figuring it out on Friday night and then confirming it with his pediatrician on Saturday night.  I made him do the meningitis test (touch your chin to your chest), realized the antibiotics weren't working at all, his lymph nodes were really, really big on his neck, his fever was raging, and his nose, throat, uvula and tonsils were ginormous!  It screamed mono, not strep.  

 

Don't worry - I like using doctors.  :)

[YaelAldrich]

I just want to say I am  not at all happy any of you or your family members) got mono, but the knowledge you have is way better than some boring website.  I made my son read the Hive's pronouncements and he is (for now) ready to rest until he is all better.....

 

Thank you!

[kewb]

Mono is a lousy Hanukkah present. I am sorry your family is dealing with it. I had mono right after I graduated from college. I was out of commission for weeks. You can not rush recovery.

Edited December 26, 2016 by kewb

[FriedClams]

I had it like that in 5th grade. I was in bed for 4-6 weeks, then half days for another month. I was so so so sick. I hope he's better soon. (((Hugs)))

[YaelAldrich]

The issue with school is that it is a rather intense college prep yeshiva high school, which means they try to excel in both secular studies and Jewish studies.  School starts at 7:30am and goes to 7pm M-Th.  He has kendo (Japanese fencing) twice a week from 7-9pm and basketball practice on Tuesday evenings from 7-9pm and violin lessons Friday afternoon (school on Fridays is 7:30-12:30) and school on Sundays from 8:30-12:30.

 

See the problem here? Even taking out all the extracurriculars, school is a real bear.

[Mergath]

The issue with school is that it is a rather intense college prep yeshiva high school, which means they try to excel in both secular studies and Jewish studies.  School starts at 7:30am and goes to 7pm M-Th.  He has kendo (Japanese fencing) twice a week from 7-9pm and basketball practice on Tuesday evenings from 7-9pm and violin lessons Friday afternoon (school on Fridays is 7:30-12:30) and school on Sundays from 8:30-12:30.

 

See the problem here? Even taking out all the extracurriculars, school is a real bear.

 

That sucks. :( He doesn't really have much of a choice, though. His health is much more important than extracurriculars or staying completely caught up in school. The school should understand that. It's not like he's having some seasonal allergies or something. Mono is serious. When I was in the hospital, they told me that if my mom had waited another day or two to bring me in the dehydration could have killed me. That kind of thing can really sneak up on you and become serious before you even realize there's a problem. He really does need to stay home and rest regardless of the consequences in school.

 

[Melissa in Australia]

I think what we are all trying to say from our experiences is that if your son doesn't rest LOTS than instead of months to recover it could very well be years to recover.

[fraidycat]

I think what we are all trying to say from our experiences is that if your son doesn't rest LOTS than instead of months to recover it could very well be years to recover.

This. If at all. See chronic illness mentions above.

 

Absolutely nothing else is more important than rest, rest, and more rest. Not school, not activities, not even college entrance. He'a got a long life ahead of him. There are always other options for education, even if it is a year or ten later - there are not other options for health. It's now or never.

Edited December 26, 2016 by fraidycat

[HSmomof2]

I had mono right after graduating from college and just starting my new job. I missed 2 weeks of work (thankfully they were understanding). I was only able to stay awake for a couple hours at a time, especially during the first week of it. I didn't feel completely better for about 6 months.

[Tanaqui]

The issue with school is that it is a rather intense college prep yeshiva high school, which means they try to excel in both secular studies and Jewish studies.  School starts at 7:30am and goes to 7pm M-Th.  He has kendo (Japanese fencing) twice a week from 7-9pm and basketball practice on Tuesday evenings from 7-9pm and violin lessons Friday afternoon (school on Fridays is 7:30-12:30) and school on Sundays from 8:30-12:30.

 

See the problem here? Even taking out all the extracurriculars, school is a real bear.

 

Well, if he doesn't take the time he needs to recover, then he will need to take a lot more time. He's not going to be doing any school or extracurriculars any sooner than two weeks, and probably a month from now.

 

But if you don't believe us, go back and ask the doctor. Edit: Sorry, it's something about this time of year, I get super snarky. You didn't deserve that.

Edited December 26, 2016 by Tanaqui

[mumto2]

Regarding huge lymph nodes, mine were swollen to some degree for the next year. They became hugely swollen each time I started becoming ill with anything for years. Tell him to listen to his body.

[maize]

I think this is a case where you have to prepare for the worst (he's going to take months to recover and need to severely limit all activity) while still hoping for the best (he has a mild case and will be one of the ones who is mosty recovered in a couple of weeks).

 

Best wishes to him and you. I think this is one of those curve balls life throws at us where we have to step back and re-evaluate our priorities. Health comes first, before basketball or fencing or even completing high school credits this year. Worst case scenario he takes a semester off and graduates a bit later, but with his health rebuilt. In the grand scheme of life that's a pretty minor blip. (Actually, worst case scenario would be that he pushes himself too hard and does not give his body the time it needs to recover, resulting in much longer term effects from the illness. I don't think you're going to go there though :) )

[Starr]

It might be a good idea and go back to the doctor for an official mono diagnosis. it will give you and the school more info. I'm really sorry. We had mono here at age five which was much easier to manage.  :grouphug:

[Anne in CA]

I had mono as a teen and didn't take care of myself and did damage to my health that I have only recently recovered from. Take all the time he needs for recovery. It's really important.

The issue with school is that it is a rather intense college prep yeshiva high school, which means they try to excel in both secular studies and Jewish studies.  School starts at 7:30am and goes to 7pm M-Th.  He has kendo (Japanese fencing) twice a week from 7-9pm and basketball practice on Tuesday evenings from 7-9pm and violin lessons Friday afternoon (school on Fridays is 7:30-12:30) and school on Sundays from 8:30-12:30.

 

See the problem here? Even taking out all the extracurriculars, school is a real bear.

 

If there is any silver lining here, it is that mono is a well-known illness.  It is likely that the school, or at least the administrators, are familiar with it, and how serious it is, and typical approaches to kids who come down with it.  I would have a conversation with them, and it may be better for him in the long run to take a whole semester off, so he can return at full strength to his demanding life.

[Bluegoat]

I think this is a case where you have to prepare for the worst (he's going to take months to recover and need to severely limit all activity) while still hoping for the best (he has a mild case and will be one of the ones who is mosty recovered in a couple of weeks).

 

Best wishes to him and you. I think this is one of those curve balls life throws at us where we have to step back and re-evaluate our priorities. Health comes first, before basketball or fencing or even completing high school credits this year. Worst case scenario he takes a semester off and graduates a bit later, but with his health rebuilt. In the grand scheme of life that's a pretty minor blip. (Actually, worst case scenario would be that he pushes himself too hard and does not give his body the time it needs to recover, resulting in much longer term effects from the illness. I don't think you're going to go there though :) )

 

I think it can be useful to take these things as a kind of spiritual or psychological opportunity.  Mono is often really telling people they need to slow down - it shows itself when our immune systems and defences are already compromised.  Sometimes people need to be out of the rush for a bit, and rethink their direction, and perhaps the body has its own ways of creating that space for us.

[Only me]

I had mono as a teen. I was out of school for 2 months. I had to quit ice skating. I had no energy for at least 6 months. I have auto immune issues now I've seen some research that says they are related.

 

My daughter had mono last year in college right before finals of course. She had an unusual case as her throat did not hurt horribly at first. She could not keep food down for several days and was very lethargic. She survived on crackers and Gatorade until she came home for break. The doctors at the campus clinic didn't even test her and basically blew it off saying it was a virus. When she got home she started getting a horrible sore throat and high fever. Sure enough she had mono. She spent her whole break recovering but unfortunately it was too late for her finals. She did not do well on finals and since they said it was "just a virus" she could not get a doctor's note and couldn't postpone finals. (The poor girl got a concussion a few weeks before finals this time)

 

She is a hockey player and refused to stop playing, which worried me a lot but she was 20 so I couldn't force her. I worried about her spleen. Luckily she did have 3 weeks to recover at home but I honestly don't think she fully recovered for several months.

[JennyD]

Ay yi yi.  Never a dull moment, eh?

 

I agree with those who have said to prepare for the worst and hope for the best.  I had mono the second semester of my senior year in college and to this day I still regret not just taking that semester off and making up the work over the summer.  As it was, I tried to power through and was sick much longer than I should have been and did far worse in my schoolwork. Fortunately, no lasting health effects, but still, I was an idiot.  

 

You're probably already planning to do this (or have done this already) I'd check with the school about how they handle extended illnesses. Presumably he's not the first student to be out for a lengthy period of time.  

 

Hope he feels better soon, and that 10yo kicks her virus, too!  Our Hanukkah has also been mostly illness so far -- the kids are coming out of it but DH and are still pretty unwell.      

[foxbridgeacademy]

I had mono when I was in 5th grade.  I was out of school for over a month went to the doctor 2X per week (for vitamin shots and to check my liver/spleen).  My mom sent me back to school to soon, ended up a week later with pneumonia that put me out of school for another 3 weeks.  I still felt like crap months later.  My teacher (who admitted to disliking me) tried to fail me but I had done all the homework and passed that years standardized tests in the 97-99 percentile.  

 

I suggest you not try to send him back until he's completely well, mono isn't the same as the flu. 

Edited December 26, 2016 by foxbridgeacademy

[cjzimmer1]

I had mono is college.  I had a much milder case than what I saw with my friends who had it.  Even so I slept most of the first week.  Worse than being tired was how severe my legs ached. Walking to the bathroom was hard because my legs hurt too bad.  I only missed about a week of classes but I had to drive to classes the whole rest of the semester because I couldn't walk the 3-4 blocks from my dorms to the classrooms (thankfully I had really close parking).  I napped every day the rest of the semester. I also had a doctor's pass and didn't take my phyed class for the rest of the semester.  I then developed an abcess in my throat (I have a history of them) so that just prolonged the whole thing but the doctor said that because of the weakened state from the mono is why the abcess developed.

 

So yeah no school today or for the rest of the week.  You can reconsider next week and see where he is at.  You might have to consider returning to school part time because with the hours the school runs, he very well may not be able to handle that long of a day.

[umsami]

The issue with school is that it is a rather intense college prep yeshiva high school, which means they try to excel in both secular studies and Jewish studies.  School starts at 7:30am and goes to 7pm M-Th.  He has kendo (Japanese fencing) twice a week from 7-9pm and basketball practice on Tuesday evenings from 7-9pm and violin lessons Friday afternoon (school on Fridays is 7:30-12:30) and school on Sundays from 8:30-12:30.

 

See the problem here? Even taking out all the extracurriculars, school is a real bear.

 

Yikes, that's some schedule even for somebody 100% well.

 

I'm going to bet, though, that your son isn't the first HS student there to get mono.  So maybe reach out to the principal, and find out what has worked best with other kids?

 

:grouphug:  though.  It can't be easy.