keeping maiden name as middle name?

[HollyDay]

Didn't it used to be that the woman kept her maiden name as a middle name when she got married. For example, Susie May Smith became Susie Smith Jones upon her marriage to Bob Jones.

 

Very few women I know are doing this anymore. They are dropping their maiden name entirely and keeping their original middle name. So, Susie would be Susie May Jones. Is this a new trend or has it been around awhile I just missed it?

[Jean in Newcastle]

Most of my friends (in their 50's and 40's) have kept their middle name. There were a couple of friends, who hated their middle names who opted for changing to their maiden name as their middle name. But perhaps it is more common in certain regions?

[PeacefulChaos]

Didn't it used to be that the woman kept her maiden name as a middle name when she got married. For example, Susie May Smith became Susie Smith Jones upon her marriage to Bob Jones.

 

Very few women I know are doing this anymore. They are dropping their maiden name entirely and keeping their original middle name. So, Susie would be Susie May Jones. Is this a new trend or has it been around awhile I just missed it?

 

I had actually never heard of keeping the maiden name until recently. I'm wondering if it's a regional thing?

I grew up in the midwest and never even considered it when I got married.

I wouldn't have kept it, anyway. It would have made my name 4 words and far too long. :tongue_smilie: Kara ****** **** ******. Yeah, no thanks. :D

[happyhomemaker]

Most women I know just went with whichever sounded better with their new last name. I am a pretty traditional person, but this is one I chose to break. It's my name- why shouldn't it be what I like as opposed to one given by convention?

[freesia]

Didn't it used to be that the woman kept her maiden name as a middle name when she got married. For example, Susie May Smith became Susie Smith Jones upon her marriage to Bob Jones.

 

Very few women I know are doing this anymore. They are dropping their maiden name entirely and keeping their original middle name. So, Susie would be Susie May Jones. Is this a new trend or has it been around awhile I just missed it?

My mother dropped her maiden name in the 60s. When I lived in Canada it seemed to be what everyone did. I kept all my names.

[momofkhm]

I thought it was southern thing. I kept it all.

[blakereese]

I actually thought it was the other way. I thought women keeping their maiden name as a middle name was a more recent trend. I know my grandmother, my mother, and all of the ladies around their age thought it was so weird that I changed my middle name. You are supposed to take your husband's name and all that. :) I liked my maiden name though, and didn't like my middle name. :D

[Zebra]

I didn't want a last name for a middle name...so I kept my middle name. I didn't realize until later that it wasn't "the norm".

[ashfern]

I changed my middle name to my maiden name. 1) I was 1 semester from graduating college. I didn't want to have my degree with just my first name the same. 2) I hate my given middle name. It doesn't help that my uncle constantly teased me about it growing up. :glare:

[jentancalann]

I kept my middle name when I married almost 15 years ago. I knew you were "supposed" to keep your maiden name but I felt more attached to my middle name. I should have made it more well know, though, because my mil keeps giving me monogrammed stuff with my maiden initial.

[edelweiss]

When I got married, I dropped my middle name and kept my maiden name as my new middle name. My sister kept her middle name, and I was really surprised because it is so boring. I like the tradition of keeping your maiden name as a middle name as a way of retaining a bit of your "heritage". I hope my daughters will follow this tradition.

[Word Nerd]

It must be a regional thing. I've not heard of that particular "should" regarding marriage before, though one aunt changed her middle name when she married.

[Desert Rat]

My mom did. It was mandatory when she got her first nursing license way back when.

[LaxMom]

I kept my maiden name as my middle (I don't have a middle at all) the first time I married. After practically needing an act of Congress to get my name back when I divorced, I chose to keep my name when I married the second time.

[Ruby Rose]

I think my legal name is my middle name, but my maiden name does sneak in to some documents. On fb I'm my first maiden last name. People also tend to monogram thing First Last Maiden initial around here.

[Jpoy85]

I have my married name BUT when i sign something i put my maiden-married. I WANT to get it legally hyphenated but i actually dont know how? :confused:

 

I want to do it not for trend or anything but because DS has my maiden name and both DDs have my married.

[Amber in SJ]

My middle name is short and in my semi-hillbilly (tongue in cheek) upbringing is often combined with my first name. Think Petticoat Junction. This is how my grandparents, aunts & uncles refer to me. It makes Dh laugh to the point of tears even after 22 years of marriage.

 

When I got married I shifted my maiden name to middle name status without dropping my middle name, so I have two middle names.

 

This was the 90's in California and almost everyone I knew was either adding their married name to their maiden name or not changing it at all.

 

I gave my children my maiden name as a second middle name and both of my sisters followed suit for their daughters. My dad, who is very traditional, thinks it is weird and sighs loudly when another granddaughter is born and is given our maiden name, his last name, as a middle name. I prefer to think of it as a source of hidden strength. I come from a long line of no-nonsense, strong women. We like to say ****** women can do anything!

 

Amber in SJ

[Tutor]

I followed in the footsteps of my mother and grandmothers and legally added my married name to the end of my maiden name. Although most of the time I sign First Maiden Married, my legal name is First Middle Maiden Married. Fwiw, I grew up in the northeast US.

[MissKNG]

I don't have a middle name so when I got married, I put the first letter of my maiden name as my legal middle initial. And in reality, I never use it. Now I'm bummed I gave myself a middle initial because I always thought that NOT having a middle name made me even more unique! :D

[Corraleno]

I actually thought it was the other way. I thought women keeping their maiden name as a middle name was a more recent trend. I know my grandmother, my mother, and all of the ladies around their age thought it was so weird that I changed my middle name. You are supposed to take your husband's name and all that.

That's what I thought, too. I use my maiden name as my middle name because that's how I was known professionally, and my academic publications are in that name, so when I married DH I just added his last name onto the end. But almost all of the other women in my family, from my grandmother to my niece, dropped their maiden names and kept their original middle names when they married. The only one who didn't is an aunt who also kept her maiden name for professional reasons. I wonder if career/profession is more of a factor than regional or generational differences?

 

Jackie

[milovany]

I've had the opposite experience. It seems more common to keep one's middle name than maiden name. I wish I would have done my maiden name instead of my middle name. I feel more attached to it because it's a family name and not just one little name not really related to anything that my mom picked out for me (hope that makes sense and doesn't sound disrespectful; I do like my middle name, too). Before I was married, I was a writer and I so I used my maiden name as my byline. I don't know -- I toy with the idea of changing it legally.

[HelenNotOfTroy]

The first time I was married, I moved my maiden to the middle slot. The second time, I kept my middle and just changed my last. My mother as her middle name, her mother used her middle as her "real" name, so she just changed her maiden to her married last name. My other grandmother moves the names up a slot and drops the old one in the middle each time (first marriage First Maiden Married1, second marriage First Married1 Married2, etc.)

 

Other friends and relations do everything from keep maiden name without married, hyphenate last names, make up a new last name, and either of the above options.

[mellifera33]

I kept my maiden name as my middle name and dropped my original middle name, which I never liked because it is very generic and common. :)

[mytwomonkeys]

in the south (at least where i'm from) it is still common to drop the middle name. i did drop my maiden name & chose to keep my middle name. that was unusual in my circle though...so maybe it's just regional??

[TKDmom]

I always thought keeping the maiden name was something that people did 100 years ago, but not anymore. Like Laura Elizabeth Ingalls becoming Laura Ingalls Wilder. (My kids refer to anything that seems long ago as "back in Laura's time...) :D

 

I never liked my maiden name. It's the kind of name that no one can spell correctly and telemarketers always mispronounced. Besides, it's 3 syllables, which I think would sound too unwieldy between my first name and my married name, which are 2 syllables each.

[Reeciecup]

I dropped my middle name and kept my maiden name for funny reasons.

1. My maiden name starts with a G and my middle name starts with an E. I thought my G's were prettier than my E's, so I wanted to keep the G...hahaha

2. My middle name is my mom's name, and of course my last name came from my dad. I like my dad more than my mom, so I would rather have his name.

 

Silly reasons, but I was only 18. I was entitled to a little immaturity, I guess. We're still going strong after 20 years so I guess it all worked out :)

[NittanyJen]

I grew up in PA; my Mom's relatives were from Iowa and NJ and Dad's were all from PA. On both sides of the family it was assumed that the woman would drop her middle name and take her maiden name as her new middle name.

 

I, however, LOVED my middle name, which was named for my Mom's best friend/college roommate, who also happened to be my Dad's sister :). How could I give up that special tie? Out went the maiden name, and my family remarked quite a while how very "modern" I was.

 

About five years after we married (it has now been a couple of decades) I started to regret the decision-- I wish I had kept BOTH names as middle names, long as my maiden name was, and when I initial things, I do actually use all four initials, and I will sign non-legal documents with all four names. And thanks to Okinawan tradition (the tradition of our martial art, not my genetic heritage, which is European of various flavors) my various martial arts licenses and certificates as a black belt are all and will remain registered in my maiden name only, never in my married name. I will always be "Sensei <maiden name>."

 

I'm glad about that. I'm proud to be married to my husband and to bear his name, but I will always have grown up in my own family, too, and that is not something I should have legally set aside. Just like my Mom followed the tradition of giving my brother HER maiden name as his middle name, I like to see female surnames stay in the family, I don't want my kids or grandkids to not know half of where they came from. Our family is just as important as my husband's family.

[Stayseeliz]

I kept my maiden name is my middle name when I got married. I am very close to my family and wanted that connection as well. My son loves both sides of the family so much that he signs his name Firstname Middlename MYmaidenname Ourlastname. I think it's cute!

[Dmmetler]

I kept mine because my professional credentials were in my maiden name, and that way it was obvious it was me. My mother, OTOH, dropped her maiden name entirely-she HATED it after years of being teased in school because of it.

[MooCow]

I dropped my middle name, and kept my maiden as my middle. My ex-sil did that as well.

[Kathryn]

I kept both as middle names. My mother and grandmother both dropped their maiden names.

[Myeightkiddies]

My mother used her maiden name as her middle name. If she was alive today, she'd be in her 70s. I kept my middle name. My married last name is long, so using my shorter middle name made sense to me at the time.

[magnificent_baby]

This is the first I have ever heard of this. :confused:

 

I wouldn't drop my middle name, I love it and I share it with my Grandma and several cousins, as well as my daughter. :001_smile:

 

I do miss my maiden name though; it means a lot to me.

[elegantlion]

It must be a regional thing. I've not heard of that particular "should" regarding marriage before

 

Me either. :confused:

 

Although that explains an official document I has to sign when we lived in the south. My maiden name was listed along with my middle and married name. I was married previously and dropped that name, so I haven't used my maiden name officially for 25 years.

 

I would like to add my maiden name as my middle name because I have no brothers and no uncles to carry on the name. There's hundreds of years of heritage that will be lost.

[Shellers]

This is the first I have ever heard of this. :confused:

 

Same here!

 

I hated my maiden name and was so happy to dump it.

[Perogi]

This is the first I have ever heard of this. :confused:

 

I wouldn't drop my middle name, I love it and I share it with my Grandma and several cousins, as well as my daughter. :001_smile:

 

I do miss my maiden name though; it means a lot to me.

 

I've never heard of this either. Everyone I know dropped the maiden name, kept the middle name and took the husbands last name.

[vonfirmath]

Didn't it used to be that the woman kept her maiden name as a middle name when she got married. For example, Susie May Smith became Susie Smith Jones upon her marriage to Bob Jones.

 

Very few women I know are doing this anymore. They are dropping their maiden name entirely and keeping their original middle name. So, Susie would be Susie May Jones. Is this a new trend or has it been around awhile I just missed it?

 

It seems to be regional. All of my husband's family kept their maiden name and dropped their middle (He expected me to do the same). My family kept the middle and dropped the maiden.

[umsami]

That was the norm where I grew up in Michigan.

 

I actually chose to keep my maiden name, which in hindsight now with four kids, I regret--but it would be too big of a pain to change it now. I think part of the reason was I got married in my 30s...and it didn't make sense to give up the name I'd always been known as, gotten my degrees as, etc.

 

If I were to change...I'd be (OK don't remember all the names in the post)..but

 

Susan Marie Maiden HusbandsLastName

 

 

DH is Egyptian and there almost all women keep their maiden name.

[rhrice3]

My maiden name is my middle name, because we were married in LA many, many years ago when that became your legal name whether you liked it or not. I am not sure how it is now or in other states. I know women do it all different ways now - hyphenated, keep maiden as main, etc

 

Do what works for you, but I do like that we all - kids, dh, and myself - all have the same last name.

 

ReneeH

[ecj98]

I kept my middle name.

 

My mom, however, always went by her middle name, so she dropped her 1st name. So her legal name is Middle name, Maiden name, Married last name.

[PrincessMommy]

I kept both as middle names. My mother and grandmother both dropped their maiden names.

 

That's what I did. I kept my middle name and added on my maiden name to it. I've been married for almost 27yrs. So either it's not really a new trend or I'm very "fashion forward." or whatever it would be called for name trends LOL.

 

The only issue I've had is that my middle name initials are now M-D. So sometimes I get something in the mail addressed with M.D. at then END of my name. :confused:

[Guest]

I kept my maiden name as my middle, though I still use my original middle name on anything where legal name is crucial. When I chose to do this, I thought of it as something that is occasionally done and other times not; like an option some choose while others don't. I am very attached to my maiden name and didn't want to see it go. :D

[Pamela H in Texas]

I've always had a little guilt about this though I'm glad I did it "my" way. My opinion is that it is my name and therefore I should get to have it the way I'd like, not just based on some convention.

 

Anyway, my mom's name is Karen Maiden Married. I really did think that was the way it was supposed to be.

 

My name is Pamela Middle Married. I really didn't like my maiden name (hard to say, tease-able, and I don't have any other connection with my father's side of the family).

[HSMom2One]

When I remarried 17 years ago I reclaimed my maiden name and started using it as my middle name, then added my new last name (no hyphens). I did this legally and no longer use my original middle name. For me, it was a matter of personal preference. I missed my maiden name, and as soon as I took it back I actually felt like me again - even with my new married name at the end.

 

I think in this era women are doing whatever they want to do with their name. My bff went through a divorce, took back her maiden name and when she eventually remarried decided to leave her name as it was. For her, like me, it is an identity thing.

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

[Nature]

I never heard of that either. I'm also from the midwest.

[Farrar]

The people I know of who did that didn't have given middle names - older generation and all that.

[Hypatia.]

When I married I took my maiden name as my middle name. My mother, step-mother, maternal and paternal grandmothers had done the same thing and I didn't know anyone who did it differently until later. My family is from the south.

 

In fact, DS2 has my paternal grandmother's maiden name as his middle name and if #5 is a boy then he will most likely have my mom's maiden name as his middle name.

[TravelingChris]

Never changed my name and didn't hyphenate because it would have been too long. But I never heard of this. I will have to check the obituaries more closely to see if that is done around here or if there is a regional pattern. (I live in the SOuth but many people here are from different regions of the country).

[TranquilMind]

I had actually never heard of keeping the maiden name until recently. I'm wondering if it's a regional thing?

I grew up in the midwest and never even considered it when I got married.

I wouldn't have kept it, anyway. It would have made my name 4 words and far too long. :tongue_smilie: Kara ****** **** ******. Yeah, no thanks. :D

 

I kept mine for professional reasons, until I had the kids. I took his name and added it to mine. Then it was too long for Social Security and the state made me change it to fit in the boxes, because my driver's license would be invalidated if SSN name and driver's license name were not perfect matches. Irked me to do this in my late 40's!

 

Both my kids have my original last name as their middle name.

[somo_chickenlady]

Not a woman, but my husband was adopted as a teenager and he moved his original last name to a middle name. Say his name was originally Bob James Jones (fictional name), and his adopted parents are the Frank and Judy Williams. His name is now Bob James Jones Willams, and he goes by Bob Williams.