Why is it just assumed...

[TraciWA]

that a child close to 16 is getting their drivers license?

My ds is 15 1/2 and everyone is assuming he is taking drivers ed and getting his license at 16. We have decided to postpone that as a family rule and wait until he is 18 for a variety of reasons.

 

Is anyone else waiting?

[SweetMissMagnolia]

my nephew is 22 and isn't ready for his license (his thinking)--they are going to get him his learner's permit soon but it's been his choice to wait....

[Wendi]

My 15yo has Asperger's and ADHD. We have made it clear since he was young that driving is a huge responsibility (because people can get killed!), and we won't be making that decision based on age, but readiness. My son is anxious about driving, so he's not fussing about that. My guess is it will be a couple of years. Most of his friends are not driving yet, either.

 

Wendi

[twinmami01]

My step-son was 17 before he got his learner's permit. We didn't feel he was ready and we only had one vehicle anyway, so it just seemed to work for us.

[ChocolateReignRemix]

Why? Because a lot of kids (most?) do get their license at 16.

[LibraryLover]

It is a topic of conversation which interests teens, even if they are waiting.

 

My oldest got his at 16.5, because he was highly motivated, the other kids were not encouraged to do so because of insurance rates. My 19 yr old finally has her license and I am so glad. It's nice to have the driving help. The other teen still doesn't have a permit.

 

I know lots of families holding off for financial and maturity reasons. Still, the experience is good. Practicing with a permit for a long time can make for a better driver in the end.

Edited January 3, 2012 by LibraryLover

[Lolly]

that a child close to 16 is getting their drivers license?

My ds is 15 1/2 and everyone is assuming he is taking drivers ed and getting his license at 16. We have decided to postpone that as a family rule and wait until he is 18 for a variety of reasons.

 

Is anyone else waiting?

 

Well, it is assumed that they are because that is when the vast majority get them. I'd say it is well above the 90% range. That would make it a fair assumption to make.

[Joker]

Still, the experience is good. Practicing with a permit for a long time can make for a better driver in the end.

 

The above is why I plan on both dds getting their permits when old enough. They need the practice and will get to with dh and I. My dad and brother were killed by a 16 year old driver (driving alone ~ no parents)but I still want the girls to get theirs at the normal time so they can practice, practice, practice.

[angela in ohio]

We were going to wait until 18, but instead decided to have her take the classes, get her temps, and then her license, but still have her drive with us until 18. Being a new driver is part of the problem, and that will happen at 16 or 18 or 35, so the age is only one apsect. We want her to get a LOT of experience, but with us there to help and guide.

 

In Michigan, you cans start Driver's Ed at 14 and 9 months (!!) but we waited until she was almost 15 1/2. Her temps will come at almost 16, then her license at about 17 or so. Then she'll get about a year of driving with us, and we will get to say when we think she's ready. It's hard to know what age that will be until they actually take the training and start driving.

[creekland]

Why? Because a lot of kids (most?) do get their license at 16.

 

This is it. While some wait (for good reasons) the majority do not. My December baby just got his permit after turning 16... but we're ready for him to have it and I'm confident he'll make a good driver. If neither were the case, I'd see no need to go with the majority.

 

We found out with my oldest that it's VERY useful having an extra driver. I want youngest to have his real license before middle heads off to college as I prefer not to have the taxi driver role again.

 

But again, that view would change if I thought he wouldn't be safe.

[Myra]

My eldest didn't get his learner's permit until he was 17 and his adult license until he was 18. His reasoning was - why bother because (1) we live in a fairly rural area and only make trips into town when we have several errands to run at once so everyone goes in together! and (2) we only have one family car during the day and he wasn't going to have his own car!

 

Our state has a graduated drivers plan - where as you can get your permit at 16 and must have at least 6 months of driving before you can take your road test. Even then, you get a junior license that only allows you to drive to and from school and medical appts during day time hours until you're 17, etc.....only getting a full adult license at 18.

 

Myra

[Aggie]

We decided a long time ago that 18 was a good age to get a license.

 

However, 15yodd did get her permit and I'm glad. It's taking a long time for her to get any practice because we don't allow her to drive if her siblings are in the car.

 

I heard, but haven't researched it yet, that in Texas 16yos have to have 10 hours of night time driving before they get their license. I'd rather our dc drive with us at night than get their license at 18 with no practice.

[Nakia]

For the same reason that people assume children are going to public school; it's the "normal" thing to do.

[Kathryn]

Because that's what is "normal."

 

I got my permit at 15, which meant I could drive with an adult. I didn't get my license until I was 20 and married.

[Amy in NH]

Is anyone else waiting?

 

Yep. My oldest is now 17. He hasn't learned how to drive, nor has he taken driver's education classes. For the most part, the decision has been based on old quirky vehicles and the cost of car insurance for a teenaged-male. But he hasn't been chomping at the bit, either. If we teach him this spring when we get a new(er) vehicle, and he gets a few months of practice with parents under his belt, he can take the test and get his license next fall without having the pay the $450 for driver's ed.

 

Our custody situation makes it nearly impossible for him to have a job to pay for his own driver's ed/car insurance...

[Scarlett]

Wow, I got my learners permit the day I turned 14 and my license the day I turned 16. It was one of the most exciting days of my life.

 

I have noticed more and more kids just 'not interested.' And these aren't kids whose parents want them to wait....(I know there are insurance and safety issues at play sometimes)...they just inexplicably don't care about driving.

[Tammyla]

My oldest didn't want her's right away; she would rather be green.

 

My ds, will probably be there when the doors open on his birthday.

[sheryl]

that a child close to 16 is getting their drivers license?

My ds is 15 1/2 and everyone is assuming he is taking drivers ed and getting his license at 16. We have decided to postpone that as a family rule and wait until he is 18 for a variety of reasons.

 

Is anyone else waiting?

 

 

:iagree: That is EXACTLY what we're doing. Our dd will NOT be ready, for a variety of reasons, to start driving. She will be around 18 as well and she knows it.

[silliness7]

waiting here

[stansclan89]

My oldest didn't care if he had a license and waited until he was 18yo.

 

My second is 18yo now and has a permit. He is the worst driver I have ever seen :001_huh:. He also doesn't care if he has a license and we aren't in a hurry ;).

 

My third (16yo now, with a permit) is actually a wonderful driver and seemed to come to it naturally. We can't afford to pay her insurance and she can't seem to find a job so she will be waiting also.

 

ETA

I have noticed that hsers tend to wait. Maybe because there is no peer pressure the kids don't really care?

Edited January 3, 2012 by stansclan89

[Scarlett]

My oldest didn't care if he had a license and waited until he was 18yo.

 

My second is 18yo now and has a permit. He is the worst driver I have ever seen :001_huh:. He also doesn't care if he has a license and we aren't in a hurry ;).

 

My third (16yo now, with a permit) is actually a wonderful driver and seemed to come to it naturally. We can't afford to pay her insurance and she can't seem to find a job so she will be waiting also.

 

ETA

I have noticed that hsers tend to wait. Maybe because there is no peer pressure the kids don't really care?

 

I see it with public school kids too. My dss15 has ZERO desire to take the test. He could have taken it when he was with us this summer and drove all summer, but he just shrugged. I took him to get the book, told him I would help him study, offered to take him back to take the test...nope.

[Lizzie in Ma]

We will be getting our daughter her learner's permit at 16 do she can learn how to drive. She won't be getting her license til she is 18 so we can skip the $700 drivers ed course requirement.

[Heather in AL]

My oldest didn't care if he had a license and waited until he was 18yo.

 

My second is 18yo now and has a permit. He is the worst driver I have ever seen :001_huh:. He also doesn't care if he has a license and we aren't in a hurry ;).

 

My third (16yo now, with a permit) is actually a wonderful driver and seemed to come to it naturally. We can't afford to pay her insurance and she can't seem to find a job so she will be waiting also.

 

ETA

I have noticed that hsers tend to wait. Maybe because there is no peer pressure the kids don't really care?

 

Re the part I bolded~~ dh just read an article that stated more and more kids are holding off getting their licenses because they are wanting to text all the time and they can't text and drive. He forgot to send it to me, so I'm going to hassle him about it as I want to read it.

[eloquacious]

It's been said, but of course the assumption is based on the fact that most teens do.

 

In Germany, we are "legal" to drink at 16 and drive at 18, so it's customary for no one to drive before then. And it's a difficult and expensive process, getting a license, and even more expensive to own and operate a car. Thankfully, there is fantastic public transportation everywhere. Living in Phoenix, I imagine I'll want my sons to drive as soon as they are ready. I don't want to have to be carting them about forever.

[Scarlett]

We will be getting our daughter her learner's permit at 16 do she can learn how to drive. She won't be getting her license til she is 18 so we can skip the $700 drivers ed course requirement.

 

Wow, that is steep! I am glad AR doesn't have that requirement.....Your roads may be safer than ours though! :lol:

[Jay3fer]

For what it's worth, I have told my big kids since they were about 2 that they are not getting dl's until they are 18 years old and can afford a car and insurance.

 

Now that ds is 17, he's calling me on it pretty regularly, and telling me he'll learn over the summer while he's out west with his grandparents. And dd is actually turning 16 today and tells me "all her friends" are getting theirs. Let them.

 

When my kids try to tell me how responsible they are, so they should be allowed get get dl's, I just tell them the fact that I started when they were toddlers, before I knew how responsible or irresponsible they were going to be, should prove that it's not about THEM at all. They're not buying it, but anyway...

 

Both my brother and I totalled my mother's cars (2 separate cars, 2 separate incidents), and my sister keeps borrowing my mother's current car and dinging it up badly. All of us were over the age of 18, but the fact remains... I have no intention of ever letting my own child drive my car if I can help it. :-)))

 

(hmm... could all this bad driving be genetic??? :lol:)

[stripe]

In a lot of schools it's a mandatory subject. In hs, we had to take the in class portion but they did not offer the in car portion due to low budget mess.

[Pamela H in Texas]

My son is almost 17. It seems worse at 15 than at 16, if that helps.

I think I wish kids got their permit at 16 so they could practice with mom and dad but I see no reason most kids need to drive before 18. However, I am soooooo glad my daughter did drive sooner because I had a time I couldn't drive as well as hubby being out of town. Generally, I think it better to wait.

Edited January 3, 2012 by 2J5M9K

[abbeyej]

... decided to have her take the classes, get her temps, and then her license, but still have her drive with us until 18. Being a new driver is part of the problem, and that will happen at 16 or 18 or 35, so the age is only one apsect...

 

I think this is very wise. There are plenty of studies out there that suggest it isn't *age* but *inexperience* that leads to so many accidents in the first years of driving. Where local laws have altered the driving age to 18, they greatly reduce accidents and fatalities among 16yos -- and radically increase them among 18yos. Getting our kids many hours of supervised practice is much safer than simply delaying licenses...

[Mrs Mungo]

that a child close to 16 is getting their drivers license?

My ds is 15 1/2 and everyone is assuming he is taking drivers ed and getting his license at 16. We have decided to postpone that as a family rule and wait until he is 18 for a variety of reasons.

 

Is anyone else waiting?

 

For the same reason that people assume children are going to public school; it's the "normal" thing to do.

 

Right. People are going to assume the norm. We homeschool, so we have to correct the assumption that she is in school. She did do driver's ed through the public school system and has received her permit. She has to wait a while on her license due to how the laws in NC work.

 

Remember when you had a baby and people asked if they were sleeping through the night, if they had any teeth, etc? Most people were just making conversation, not trying to be intrusive. Asking about sports or school or driving is the teen version of that.

[stripe]

Remember when you had a baby and people asked if they were sleeping through the night, if they had any teeth, etc? Most people were just making conversation, not trying to be intrusive. Asking about sports or school or driving is the teen version of that.

Or questions about romance. Personally if I were a teen, I'd rather field the driving questions.

[Cindyz]

Sometimes things like this are just polite conversation starters.

[Lolly]

I think this is very wise. There are plenty of studies out there that suggest it isn't *age* but *inexperience* that leads to so many accidents in the first years of driving. Where local laws have altered the driving age to 18, they greatly reduce accidents and fatalities among 16yos -- and radically increase them among 18yos. Getting our kids many hours of supervised practice is much safer than simply delaying licenses...

 

:iagree:There was just recently an article out that showed just this. The fatalities/accidents just shifted from one age group to another. There was even evidence that driving ALONE was where the real learning curve was. It wasn't just the number of hours behind the wheel. In other words, more practice time with the parents didn't necessarily help. It seems me sitting in the seat giving instructions wasn't as beneficial as I had hoped.:tongue_smilie:(My kids literally have hundreds of hours drive time with their permits.)

[PeacefulChaos]

that a child close to 16 is getting their drivers license?

My ds is 15 1/2 and everyone is assuming he is taking drivers ed and getting his license at 16. We have decided to postpone that as a family rule and wait until he is 18 for a variety of reasons.

 

Is anyone else waiting?

 

I've always wondered why so many kids don't get their license at 16...

[mom2scouts]

My son will be 17 in March and he hasn't started driver's education yet. Many of his friends are already driving, but we didn't feel he was mature enough for the responsibility yet. He's a "life of the party" kind of kid and I can see him doing stupid stuff to impress his friends. My oldest son has always been very mature and responsible, so we let him get his license early. I would test him by calling his cell phone when I knew he was driving. He NEVER picked up. He waited until he was at his destination or he would pull over and return my call. Son #2 didn't get his license until he was 18. He was and is rebellious in some ways and I didn't want him driving my car! For me, it depends on the child, but we lean towards waiting.

[alpidarkomama]

We're waiting until they're 25. :lol:

[LuvingLife]

I feel your pain, everyone thought that by now I would be driving, and while I can't wait, we have been waiting for certain reasons although I do have a permit. Mostly because I am scared to death to drive but that's besides the point!:D

 

People tend to assume too much, and I hate it when people start to pry into your personal life.:glare:

[akmommy]

:iagree:There was just recently an article out that showed just this. The fatalities/accidents just shifted from one age group to another. There was even evidence that driving ALONE was where the real learning curve was. It wasn't just the number of hours behind the wheel. In other words, more practice time with the parents didn't necessarily help. It seems me sitting in the seat giving instructions wasn't as beneficial as I had hoped.:tongue_smilie:(My kids literally have hundreds of hours drive time with their permits.)

 

:iagree:

In Alaska teens can get a provisional license at 16. This lasts for 6 months and prohibits driving alone with other kids in the car (except siblings) and driving between the hours of 1 am and 6am (I think those are the times) unless driving to or from work by the most direct route. This allows them to get 6 months experience driving alone before allowing them to ride with friends and the distractions the friends create.

 

Our oldest got her lisence at 16 1/2, but she has always been a careful and fairly responsible kid. the provisional license allowed her to get some experience driving on winter roads without distraction. We lived in a smallish town, though. If we lived in a large city I probably would have waited a little longer, but I like the provisional reqiurements and want my kids to get some experience driving alone under the provisional so they will all probably get their license's by 17 1/2. When their 18 they would go straight to a full license and it would be impossible for us to control.

Edited January 3, 2012 by akmommy

[Mrs Mungo]

People tend to assume too much, and I hate it when people start to pry into your personal life.:glare:

 

Making conversation about something as innocuous as a driver's license is not prying into your personal life. Now, if they started quizzing you and pressuring you about it, that would be over the line. Just asking a conversational question like, "so are you taking driver's ed?" is not prying.

[J-rap]

It is assumed because that is the age when you are legally able to get one in most states, and is probably the age most kids DO get one. It is really not such a strange assumption. We were never as eager in our household, and only one out of five has gotten their license at that age.

[Myeightkiddies]

My two oldest daughters got theirs at 17. My oldest son was in his 20s. My next oldest son got his this winter, and he is 19. My 16 year old daughter isn't interested in getting it until we move, so she said 18 was fine with her. They really aren't interested. If they have a way to get to college classes and library, they are happy. It isn't due to our discouragement. They know that they have our support. It's their decision.

[swellmomma]

I didn't get mine until 22 (though I tookd driver training at 16, but I failed the road test back then). Ds13 has his book to study for his learner's permit (here in Alberta he can get his learner's permit at 14, and then take driver training and road test at 16, followed by the graduated license system in place for new driver's).

 

It is assumed that they will get it at 16 because most do. It is a right of passage of sorts to get your license. DS will get his learner's permit at 14 if he studies and passes the test. He will take driver's ed at 16. He may even take the road test at that time. BUT he is not allowed to use my car until he has a job to pay for the gas he consumes. He knows this is one of the stipulations to being allowed to drive so he may not be driving right at 16. I have no problem with others assuming it though. To me it is like when other's ask a 5 yr old if they are excited to start Kindy. For most that is what happens at 5 yrs old so it give others a way making conversation, same thing here, even if your family does not follow the norm of kid getting license at 16 most people use it as a way to make conversation. Many find talking to teens hard, and use these as easy conversation openers (up coming driver's license, or graduation, or college plans etc).

[Evergreen State Sue]

My ds will take driver's training this summer when he will be 16-1/2. That doesn't mean he will actually get his license shortly after. Both my dh and I were 18 when we got our licenses. I want to make sure my ds has plenty of practice before releasing him on his own. Who knows? He might have a job requiring him to drive so I want to make sure he is a good driver. He also may have to take his old mother to doctor appointments some day!

[elegantlion]

I think this is very wise. There are plenty of studies out there that suggest it isn't *age* but *inexperience* that leads to so many accidents in the first years of driving. Where local laws have altered the driving age to 18, they greatly reduce accidents and fatalities among 16yos -- and radically increase them among 18yos. Getting our kids many hours of supervised practice is much safer than simply delaying licenses...

 

:iagree: I took driver's training with guess who, my mom. Yes she was 40+ when she got her license. She rarely drives, due to inexperience and the fact my dad chauffeurs her everywhere.

 

Ds can get his permit at 15, he must have it for six months before becoming fully licensed. I'm hoping he can get his permit at 15, and learn a little winter driving before he gets his license, probably in the safety of our little town.

 

I love driving, it's one of my greatest freedoms. We don't take the privilege lightly, and I've been giving ds driving tips for years.

[Photo Ninja]

Many students here don't get their license when they turn 16 yo.

 

The schools don't offer Driver's Ed or Driver's Training, and the Driver's Ed courses cost $80 - $100 online, and sometimes more if taken in a Driving class. Then there is the cost of Driver's Training, the behind-the-wheel instruction, which costs $300 - $350 for three lessons. First the student completes the Driver's Ed course, then has to register for the behind the wheel course and take the proof of registration to the DMV before a student can get a driver's permit. That is a lot of money! Then there is the car insurance cost once they get their driver's license.

 

Because of the cost involved, many students can't afford to get a driver's permit when they are 15.5 years old. One of my dc did because she had been saving her money to pay for it. My other dc were also saving money to pay for it, but they decided to wait until they were older. One ds waited to get his driver's permit until he was 17.5 because then he would not have to take the behind the wheel training because he would take the driver's test after he turned 18 yo. He didn't want to pay for the behind the wheel course because it was so expensive, and he didn't want to deal with all the provisional new driver restrictions in effect for one year or until the student turns 18 yo (hours a new driver is allowed to drive, no passengers in the car under age 20 unless a parent is in the car or a licensed driver over age 25, etc). I did insist that he get his driver's license as soon as he turned 18 because I didn't want him to go away to college without one. It makes sense for a student to wait to get a driver's license.

 

People do tend to assume a 16 yo will be getting a driver's license, though. It is still thought of as somewhat of a rite of passage, but that trend is changing because of the cost involved and all the restrictions on newly licensed drivers.

[JennyD]

I don't have teens, but FWIW when I was a teen my parents -- my dad, mostly -- were very loath to teach me to drive. I was extremely responsible and all, but I think it just made my dad nervous and he just didn't want me to drive their car. He didn't specifically say I couldn't get my license, but he also just wouldn't take me out to practice. Finally, when I was 18, my mom took the matter into her own hands and took me out enough so I could get my license, but then I went away to school (no car), then more school and more school (still no car), and lived in various cities (no car).

 

Fast forward to this past summer, when for the first time in over twenty years I moved to a place without public transportation and suddenly had to drive everywhere. We bought a car, which I promptly banged up by bumping into various stationary objects (pole at the bank drive-through, other car, garden gate), and now at the age of 39 I have to drive as a novice WITH MY THREE KIDS in the back. It has been *extremely* stressful and I have recurring nightmares about accidents. On some level, I feel that a disaster is just a matter of time and every successful trip to the supermarket is simply postponing the inevitable.

 

Anyway, all that is to say, as a parent myself i can certainly understand not wanting to hand over the keys at age 16. but I am determined to teach my own kids to drive well before they leave the nest. Or, rather, have DH teach them. :tongue_smilie:

Edited January 3, 2012 by JennyD

[Virg]

I assume my twins will get it right at 16 so it probably wouldn't annoy me as much. However my DSS15 (almost 16) will not be getting his anytime soon due to FASD and maturity issues. He is not even ready to practice. It makes it hard when EVERYONE asks him about it as soon as they ask his age. Now I don't blame them, I understand why they do it but it is hard on him and us. I can't nicely explain without getting into things that are none of their business why he isn't getting his license and/or permit. When I just say we prefer to wait people actually try to change my mind or say something about how unfair/mean we are.

 

On a side note, growing up in the suburbs everyone got their license right away but now I am surprised about how many of the urban kids we know don't have theirs and aren't even practicing because of public transportation. They don't see the point. It is cheaper to get a student pass. I can't imagine at that age not caring if I had to depend on a bus/light rail schedule! I loved the freedom.

[PiCO]

If a young adult's family has the financial means for the young adult to have access to a car, and can pay the insurance, I assume that a 16-yo has a license or will soon.

 

My older dd drove to school by herself the day after she got her license (a day after her 16th birthday.) I'm sure my younger dd will do the same.

 

If I didn't think a child was ready for the responsibility, I would not do that. But I would expect a lot of questions as to why, because people are curious.

[Tabrett]

Honestly, I don't want to be a chauffeur. If your dc is very active in activities, having a licenses at 16 is a lifesaver for mom. I just couldn't let my older dd do all she would (and I would have) liked for her to do because it was too much to get all my littles in the care at night after her rehearsals.

[ereks mom]

that a child close to 16 is getting their drivers license?

My ds is 15 1/2 and everyone is assuming he is taking drivers ed and getting his license at 16. We have decided to postpone that as a family rule and wait until he is 18 for a variety of reasons.

 

Is anyone else waiting?

 

Most kids around here get their learner's permits as soon as they turn 15 and their licenses as soon as they turn 16. ER got his learner's permit a few weeks after his 15th birthday and his driver's license 4 months after he turned 16. EK was (is) much less eager to drive than her brother was, and she got her learner's permit (at dh's insistence) a few days before her 16th birthday, and she has not gotten her driver's license yet (she turned 17 in October). I want her to get her license this spring because I want her to be able to drive herself to rehearsals and to meet her friends at the mall instead of having me take her everywhere and then come back to pick her up.