Piercing baby's ears

[Heidi]

How many of you moms get your infant's ears pierced? Dh wants us to do it to our newborn. I'm totally against it. He thinks most moms do it to their babies. I say no way.

 

What says the Hive?:bigear:

[ChristusG]

I say no way too. I'm letting my daughters make that decision when they are old enough. I'm glad my parents never pierced my ears. I didn't end up getting it done till I was 18, and even then, I let the holes close over and still do not wear earrings. It's just not me.

[Starr]

Some cultures do this more than others. I think it can be done in the doctors office. But a newborn?

[Impish]

Nope, I made Diva wait until her 12th birthday.

[Veritaserum]

Five dds. No infant piercing. My second dd chose to get her ears pierced when she was almost 5. So far, none of the other girls want to have theirs done. I think it should be left to the girl to decide for herself.

 

In some cultures or areas of the country, infant ear piercing is extremely common. It's not common where I am, but I see it from time to time.

[BigMamaBird]

I'm against it on MY babies. I don't really care what others do to their kids. When my dd comes to me and asks to have them done, we'll consider it then.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

I don't have daughters, but I voted I'd wait until they asked. I would say the same about my sons, but dh would probably go ballistic if they wanted their ears pierced. I wouldn't care. I guess they have to wait until adulthood.

[abbeyej]

I think piercing infants' ears is typically a cultural issue. It's common among Latino families, for instance.

 

I don't have a problem with it -- but I can't see doing it if it weren't a common practice of my family and culture. I do think it's probably much easier to maintain when done with a child under 6 months old than when done for a toddler or preschooler.

[KarenNC]

I voted other---initially we were going to let her do it at a predetermined stage (rather than age), but then it turned into whenever she wanted it after she reached a certain point. She ended up having them done last winter (10.5). My husband got one ear pierced in solidarity and so that she could watch :).

[clarkacademy]

My mother pierced mine. That being said, I am against ALL body pierecing period for my body. I am also against tatoos for my body. I believe every human should have the choice what is done to to their bodies and when. The girls can have ears done when they ask but as far as anything else it will wait until they are adults. I have known way too many people who did things to their bodies when they were young only to regret it in adult life.

[Cammie]

It was a cultural thing. Did it at about 8 months. It was either do it in the US with a gun at the mall or do it in India with I don't know what. I chose in the US.

[Mabeline]

If I would have had girls I would have gotten their ears pierced around 3 months or so. I know some doctors offices offer it too. My family all pierces little girl's ears as babies. I think it looks pretty and feminine. But, if you are not comfortable with it being done to your baby, I wouldn't let anyone talk you into it.

[DusksAngel]

We're waiting for the girls to be able to clean them by themselves. So not a certain age, more of a certain maturity.

[jjins]

We had our daughter's pierced as an infant. I had so many friends with infections from too much touching and not enough cleaning, through out my childhood. Not something I wanted for my daughter.

 

Her ears healed SO quickly and her tiny earrings were sweet, dainty and very feminine.

 

Until about 8 months ago we rarely changed her earrings. Now at a little over 8 years old, she changes them on her own, takes great care of her ears and is a very happy little girl.

[jillian]

I view it as elective body modification and when/if DD asks for them done and can give us logical reasons to have it done (not "but everyone has it done mom") and prove she's got the maturity to handle the care of it. I also am against the piercing guns so we have to find a place that doesn't use them.

[Maus]

I voted 'other.' Our daughters will not be getting it done while they live in our household because DH has a near phobia against it. (Both of his sisters had theirs get infected when they were kids, and DH now gets physically ill when he sees pierced ears, particularly when he sees earrings being inserted.)

 

I never had mine pierced, as my parents said I had to wait until I was twelve or fourteen (don't remember), and by then, I was no longer interested. My mom actually tried to talk me into it, as she has pierced ears, but I didn't want to.

 

If DH didn't have his issues, we still would be against piercing the ears of a child not old enough to have a say and not old enough to understand that it might hurt, etc.

[Spy Car]

I'm the (at this time) sole vote for "never."

 

Bill

[mommaduck]

My SIL insisted on doing it to her first daughter as an infant. I told her that there were safety and health issues. She insisted that it was a cultural issue. Fine. She went and did it. Then I came home one day from the laundromat to find her hysterical and in tears. The earrings had slipped INTO the lobe and were painfully stuck. The baby was crying in pain. SIL and I had to work the earrings out.

 

That said, my stepfather was "only whores pierce their ears...if you ever, then don't expect to come home". Yeah, day after I left home, my fiance (dh) took me to get my ears pierced. He knew the rule and said he was going to make sure I never went back.

[KristinaBreece]

We won't let anyone with a piercing gun anywhere near our kids. When they're old enough for a professional piercer to pierce their ears with a needle (which is 6 for the piercer we use) is the first time it becomes even an option on the table. Additionally, we want them to be old enough to decide they want their ears pierced, and old enough to care for the piercings themselves.

 

Yes, this means DS as well. If he wants an earring at an age over 6 and we feel he can be responsible for it, he can have one. DH has both ears done. I have 7 in my ears and my tongue done. We're definitely on the side of being okay with body mods, but we are the most cautious people we know WRT piercing for our kiddos.

[Haiku]

I don't think parents should pierce a child's ears without that child's input and consent.

 

Tara

[Ellie]

I'm pretty sure that "most" moms don't do it, but I thought it was cute, so dds' ears were pierced at the same time; they were 3yo and 3mo.

 

I'm fussy about earrings for little girls, though; only posts with little pearls or little "jewels" or cute little thingies, never any hoops or anything dangly.

[MrsMe]

I agree it's a personal decision and it should be left up to the person getting it done and the parent at the same time.

[nowimscrappin]

I think it looks silly to see babies with earrings. And I had a girl that was constantly called a "Boy", even with pink dresses on, because she had no hair.

 

My kids need to be at least 10. My oldest was 10 and had to prove that she could take care of her room and bathroom before she could get them pierced.

 

My youngest is almost 7 and hasn't asked yet.

[Big Buckin' Longhorn]

I answered other.

 

I really think body modifications should be decided by the individual when they are of age, but I married into a Mexican-American family and they all get their baby girls' ears pierces VERY early. At first I was HORRIFIED, but it's grown on me over the last decade or so. The're just so darn cute! I think it's a cultural thing.

 

The little boys also wear jewelry, usually a necklace or bracelet. I know it's ridiculous, but they just look so darn handsome!

Edited October 10, 2011 by TejasMamacita

[ChiknGirl]

I really think body modifications should be decided by the individual when they are of age...

 

:iagree: I feel very strongly about this. There is no going back once you've made modifications. I would never make a decision to modify another adult's body, yet it is legal and acceptable to permanently modify children, including newborns, bodies.

[Tangerine]

We are a pierced and tattooed family, but we don't do any body mods on the littles. They'll decide that themselves.

[AK_Mom4]

I voted that we waited until a certain age - because that's what we did.

 

However, I have had many friends who pierce their baby girls ears and say they had no problem with keeping them clean, etc. It's a bit of a cultural thing - we don't see it so much here, but it was very common when we lived in Denver.

[Scuff]

I lean towards never, but it's not a hill I'm going to die on if my girls ask. My mom did ours as infants. It's my first memory, actually- at 9 months old. She used a potato, ice and a pin. I don't really wear them at all anymore. The nice thing about doing it on babies is that they don't have problems closing. But I still don't agree with it.

[SKL]

No thank you. It is too permanent, and not everyone wants to have holes in their earlobes all their lives. (Mine were pierced 33 years ago, I gave up on earrings within a few years thereafter, and you can still see the holes quite clearly.) My grandmother had hers pierced as a baby and she resented it as an adult.

 

As a percentage, I'd guess less than half of American families do this, though it seems to be increasing. Honestly, I don't know what the rush is. It's not like it's problematic to do it much later.

[Haiku]

I view it as elective body modification and when/if DD asks for them done and can give us logical reasons to have it done (not "but everyone has it done mom")

 

I don't really think that there is a logical reason to pierce ears. Most people do it because "I think it would look cool." That's a fine reason, but it's not "logical." If she wants it done because "all my friends have them," isn't the implication that she thinks it looks cool and wants to be like her friends? Why is that not a good enough reason? Are there really any "bad" or "illogical" reasons to want to get ears pierced? I mean, I guess someone could say, "I want my ears pierced because when I get them pierced, I will turn into a unicorn," but I think the likelihood of someone saying that is pretty small. ;)

 

That said, my son got his ears pierced a couple of months ago because he had wanted them done for a few years, and we were in a time when he wasn't playing any sports and they would have time to heal, so we said yes. I never asked him why he wanted them pierced. He's very happy with them, though, AND with the compliments he gets. My husband got his pierced at the same time because I wanted him to. I thought it would look hot (and it does). Of course I didn't badger him into it, but he didn't get them pierced because he wanted pierced ears. He did it because he knew I would like it.

 

Tara

[Mama Geek]

Dh wants dd to wait until she is 16, if it was up to just me I would do it when she asked. No way to doing it right after she was born.

[KristinaBreece]

I don't really think that there is a logical reason to pierce ears. Most people do it because "I think it would look cool." That's a fine reason, but it's not "logical." If she wants it done because "all my friends have them," isn't the implication that she thinks it looks cool and wants to be like her friends? Why is that not a good enough reason? Are there really any "bad" or "illogical" reasons to want to get ears pierced? I mean, I guess someone could say, "I want my ears pierced because when I get them pierced, I will turn into a unicorn," but I think the likelihood of someone saying that is pretty small. ;)

 

That said, my son got his ears pierced a couple of months ago because he had wanted them done for a few years, and we were in a time when he wasn't playing any sports and they would have time to heal, so we said yes. I never asked him why he wanted them pierced. He's very happy with them, though, AND with the compliments he gets. My husband got his pierced at the same time because I wanted him to. I thought it would look hot (and it does). Of course I didn't badger him into it, but he didn't get them pierced because he wanted pierced ears. He did it because he knew I would like it.

 

Tara

 

My husband keeps his earrings in because I think they look hot. He had them done before I met him.... but I do like to look at them.

[LaxMom]

Nope. I voted other. I wouldn't do it until asked and the minimum age in our house is 7 (though I reserve the right to say no if I thought a child was not prepared to care for the piercing). The girls both got them done on their 7th birthdays, the boys just turned 7 but have never asked.

 

No cosmetic procedures on infants is my policy, across the board.

[Pink Fairy]

I had a lot of problems with my earrings (pierced at age 6)--allergies, tearing, etc. So we waited until age 12.

[Annie]

I think any time after 8 or so they could make the decision. I wouldn't even consider doing it to a baby.

[Chris in VA]

Dd has to wait until she's 16. I know it's often a cultural thing--to each his own on that one. In our case, I am holding off. There's not much to wait for in our lives, and I think it is a way to teach something about both delaying gratification and about "with age comes priviledge and responsibility." Not the only way to teach that, but fwiw, that's what we are doing.

[Stayseeliz]

My oldest DD got her ears pierced for her 7th birthday. I wait until they are old enough to turn them and keep them clean. I told her if she didn't turn them and they got infected I would take them out and she couldn't have them redone until she was 13. She has done just fine. 7ish is the youngest I would let them get their ears pierced!

[JFSinIL]

While a tiny infant with gold studs is kinda cute, it is painful, makes more work for mom (cleaning the ears), and what if the kid doesn't want them when older? I say wait until the kid is preteen at least, and able to decide for herself AND take care of them. Daddy can get his baby girl a gold bracelet or necklace if he wants. Skip the earrings for now. In this case, Mom's vote overrides Dad's.

[twoxcell]

No infant piercing here. I will allow my dd's to pierce their ears when they are interested and I feel they are old enough and responsible enough to take care of them.

[gardenmom5]

My rule was the girls had to be at least 12.

 

There are certain cultures that pierce baby ears (seems all the babies I see with pierced ears belong to one ethnic group), but those are exceptions to what is common.

Edited October 10, 2011 by gardenmom5

[NicAnn]

It's a personal decision for the person. I don't believe in forced body modification though...and this includes piercings. Dd is already wondering when she can get earrings. I've told her when she's old enough to read and understand the pros and cons.

[TheAutumnOak]

I didn't vote because I don't have daughters, but my mom had my ears pierced when I was three months old, and I have never thought twice about it...

[Momof3littles]

I won't pierce a baby's ears but understand why some people do it (cultural reasons for example).

 

DD is asking to have hers done. She's 4, coming up on 5. I'm thinking I'd like her to wait until at least age 6, maybe 7 or 8.

 

I had mine done around age 6 but had some complications and had to let them close. I got them repierced when I was 7 or 8.

[Soror]

I don't mind it culturally but otherwise it wants to make me vomit when I see babies with earrings.

[higginszoo]

Ours is kind of a combo of a certain age and when they ask. They have to be able to completely take care of them, even when first done ... our older dd was 8 or 9. Younger dd may be older than that. There's also a 6 month cooling off/waiting period, since it is something permanent, and we want to make sure it's not just because they want it right now.

 

FWIW, we'd probably also let our boys pierce their ears, though neither have any inclination to do so.

[Hwin]

I wouldn't get it done on a baby. Even if there was no other reason, you're just going to get a better piercing on a non-wiggly, bigger earlobe.

[justamouse]

It's cultural in our family. I had it done in the Drs office as infants, and when I couldn't get there, when they were abut 5.

 

We've never had a problem, matter of fact, the girls love making their own jewelry now.

[Ellie]

I didn't vote because I don't have daughters, but my mom had my ears pierced when I was three months old, and I have never thought twice about it...

:thumbup:

[Night Elf]

I hate choosing other, but I did. I had my first dd's ears pierced when she was 3 months old. Her godparents were from Europe and it was the norm for them. They gave her a pair of gold earrings when she was born and I wanted to honor them by doing her ears. They never got infected and she never pulled at them, like I worried. Her baby pictures are gorgeous.

 

But I didn't do that for my 2nd dd. My 2nd DH and I didn't think it was important. I waited until it was her idea to have them done. I think she was about 8 years old. She took really good care of them and hers never got infected either.

[AHASRADA]

I used to see babies with pierced ears and think it was awful to put a baby through that. Then I had my own kids and, after seeing their stages of development, decided to pierce my dd's ears as infants (3 mos. and 7 mos. respectively).

 

I had mine pierced at age 8, and it was quite traumatic. They did one ear at a time, and after enduring the pain of the first one, I didn't want to allow them to do the second. It was awful. I didn't want my daughter to go through this when she was old enough to remember.

 

I realized that babies need a lot of shots, they cry for a few minutes, and they forget about it, so I considered ear piercing to be the same type of experience. I also saw that toddlers are very fidgety, and if I didn't have them pierced as infants, I would lose that window until they were old enough to be trusted to sit perfectly still and not pick at their earrings, which is getting into the age when I had mine done.

 

So, in my mind, the choices were to get it done as infants when any pain or trauma would be forgotten and she would be used to having earrings and therefore less likely to fiddle with them, pull them out, etc. Otherwise wait until age 8 or 10, when any trauma would be remembered, or wait until even older (13+) when the pain would be less of an issue, but it just seems too old.

 

All that said, there are plenty of families who see ear piercing as a rite of passage, something done at age 10, or 13, or 16 or whenever. If you don't feel piercing your infant's ears is the right thing to do, don't do it. Your dh is way out of his league here, and has no right to push you to do this. What does he know about earrings, anyway? BTW, the ears have to be cleaned 3 times a day with cotton balls soaked in cleaning solutions over a period of 8 weeks, making sure to get both the front and back and rotating the earrings slightly. If he's willing to handle the ear care, 3x/day for 2 months, he may have a leg to stand on. Otherwise, let mom decide these things for her dds!