You know for fun I just checked out Realtor.com and looked up Chatham? http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/24-Willow-St_Chatham_NJ_07928_M66854-55859?row=2 484,900 and on .16 of an acre Stock laminate cabenits, plain walls, run of the mill furniture that many of you might have in your house. This is not elite living.

You know, I was thinking of the Chatham area when I said that, but I think you are right, a small cape in Chatham/Peakpack/Madison probably will run you 500k these days. And the taxes, fugheddaboutit.

It's really cruddy when people we love do things that make us want to punch them, and things we know are really wrong. People do change, and I hope that you have the opportunity to help your Dh do just that.

Why not? just make sure that if you are going to do between their eyebrows, you don't go over the inner corner of the eye because that hair will not grow back if overwaxed and their faces are still growing. If it's their lips, wax away. If it's their eyebrows, just do a little strip.

In a high cost of living area, that is enough to put a roof over your head if you have a few kids. Maybe a modest sized cape, with a small yard. We have areas of NJ where the property taxes are 40,000 a year. People are leaving NJ in droves just because that 'elite' amount of $ gets them nowhere. That's what I hate about stats like that, they never take into account COL, and dependents.

People who abuse and control will always find a way to abuse and control. Let me tell you about a grown woman who was president of a bank who would wear sunglasses to work. They don't need homeschooling, they don't need anything. In some systems it is easier to hide than others, but they will still do it. But I'm not going to give up my homeschooling freedom for the few that use it to abuse their kids. Public schools don't shut down because some teachers sexually abuse. I'm glad the girl got out and it worked out for her, but the armchair quarterbacking in situations like this is utterly befuddling. The only thing we can do to change any of this is to consistently present non punitive parenting, not only as homeschoolers, but as parents.

A lot of times men who were cared for by Mommy have just learned to not pick up after themselves. They have never gotten out of the bad habit of leaving stuff out. It doesn't occur to them that they are being selfish by creating more work for the other person. I think Charlotte Mason called this laying down the tracks.

The only reason our Benz was a deal was we had an actual German mechanic who was trained by Benz. The cars are designed to never break down. At ___ miles they get this belt replaced. At ___ miles they get that replaced. He was a gifted mechanic. People weren't keeping the Benzs in section 8 housing because they were dependable. Please. And she sees the owners almost every day in court as repeat offenders. How DO they have the $ to post bail all the time? Want to see the problem up close and personal? Go work in the judicial system in the inner city. Delayed gratification. How about the status symbol being saving the $ and getting out of section 8 and moving to a place where you don't have to worry about what your kid sees every time they walk out on the street? Or getting out so that they can go to good schools? THAT should be the status symbol.

This is me. Two years ago (three now?) I was firmly in diabetic numbers (even though I was not obese). I cut out all grains, and sugar, and my latest A1C #'s came back stellar. I no longer have diabetes. AND I lost 40 pounds. You are totally right about them looking at you like you have two heads.

I have a family member that works for a very big city DA. Every day she walks by section 8 housing with Benz's with all kinds of modifications on them. Every day kids are in court for really dumb reasons and they should know better. I think perpetual poverty has a lot more to do with horrible decisions/family culture than the few that are held back because of health reasons.

When you are working outside the home, the scales shift, totally. Tell him that you are going to hire a cleaner once a week, and that $ has to come from somewhere (like pizza night). So he can either clean up and save the $ by investing the time, or he can lay out the cash.

Exactly. Most people don't start businesses to only help themselves, and this is tactic #2 in the argument against the accumulation of $. The first argument is that people just don't have the same opportunity. The 2nd argument is that wealthy people are greedy. Neither are true. If you actually read the above posts, you'll realize that you are sorely mistaken. Small business owners want to succeed because most of us have deep ties and love our communities. We pride ourselves in hiring local people, and we like being an asset within the community. We like being able to give back. I LOVE being able to hire someone that is in dire straights, or even recently keep someone on that needed those extra few weeks of pay so he could move his family to another state with ease. I help the economy by patronizing other small local businesses, from eateries, to machinists, to second hand equipment sales, office cleaners, accountants... Your POV? is actually the most damaging to the community and the nation as a whole. When you're poor and you don't want to see a way out? You're NOT going to be in a position to help anyone because you're having to work your whole life to help yourself.

what is this atrocity that I have a quota of likes? :glare:

too much at once. Kina sweater for my 9 yo, a headband for my son's Gf, and a shawl (oaklet) for me.

Nope. Don't do it. If they can't keep the roof over their head, they have NO business buying other people's children clothes. Especially not when you've done what you could to save what you can.