Brilliant Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Dh wants me to accompany him on a short (2-night) business trip. Our dd is 18. Yes, I know she can vote and join the military and buy cigarettes...but should we leave her in charge of 15yo ds? I'm honestly not worried about them getting into trouble - the worst is that they will spend more time on the computer than usual, or eat too much junk food. I'm just convinced there will be an earthquake or another disaster while we are gone. :001_huh: I guess our family should have a natural-disaster plan in place anyway. So, assuming we do that - would you leave the teens for 48 hours? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kchara Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 At those ages, I probably would, but you might want to check with your state laws. I wouldn't imagine there would be an issue, but you never know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wapiti Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, of course. With lots of rules/instructions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mejane Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 (edited) . Edited June 7, 2011 by Mejane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LidiyaDawn Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 18 & 15 for a couple of days? Wouldn't bother me at all. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Samiam Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 We are not there yet, but unless they have given you a reason not to trust them, I absolutely would at that age. It is good for them to have that bit of "independence" I would think, in a safe zone, ie home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In The Great White North Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, I have. I don' think there would be a legal problem either, given their ages. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oasis Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 My parents did this when I was 16 years old, and I was in charge of my other siblings (15, 11, and 9.) My kids are still very young, but I imagine as long as they were trustworthy, I would go (and keep a cell phone nearby!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KristinaBreece Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I would say yes... But I bet when we get there, DH would say no. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brilliant Posted May 31, 2011 Author Share Posted May 31, 2011 At those ages, I probably would, but you might want to check with your state laws. I wouldn't imagine there would be an issue, but you never know. There's no specific legal age to be left home alone in CA - and from what I can tell, it would be OK even if a "responsible" 15yo was left in his home with food, etc. So I think adding an 18yo in charge should really make it OK legally. She drives and we'd also leave $$ for emergencies, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brilliant Posted May 31, 2011 Author Share Posted May 31, 2011 OK, it's unanimous...I'll go...but here's an even more important question: Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plaid Dad Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Assuming both of them are trustworthy, I would have no qualms about leaving them alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In The Great White North Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100? Is there air conditioning? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brilliant Posted May 31, 2011 Author Share Posted May 31, 2011 Of course, and pools at the resort. And I think Phoenix cools off at night? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 If your 18-year old had her own place would you let her babysit your 15-year old while you were gone 2-3 days? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Veritaserum Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I would feel fine about leaving them if there were an on call adult (neighbor, relative, etc.) that could help with an emergency if needed. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 OK, it's unanimous...I'll go...but here's an even more important question: Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100? Well... yeah. In the pool with a tropical drink in my hand most of the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I would feel fine about leaving them if there were an on call adult (neighbor, relative, etc.) that could help with an emergency if needed. :) :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catz Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I would. I might assign a neighbor or friend in town that might check in with them a couple times (via phone or in person). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes.... and I would let my next door neighbor know... not that they'd do anything awful but I know she would just make a point of reminding them that she's available if they need it. Both times we've left one or both, she invited them over for dinner, which was nice. It wasn't why I told her we'd be gone but just the kind of person she is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmoe Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, but I might spend most of my time indoors! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaT Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, of course. With lots of rules/instructions. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DianeW88 Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yep, no worries at all. I've left my older kids alone with my 10 year old for a few days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommy22alyns Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I'm obviously not there yet, but I would do it. My dad took a couple of short business trips when I was 16-17 and left me on my own for a couple of days. I didn't even throw a house party! :D And Arizona? Sure, with A/C, a pool, and some nice drinks. Have fun! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinRTX Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, definitely. I left mine at home with a 14yo and a 7yo when she was 18. Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxbridgeacademy Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I would say yes, it will give them a chance to act responsibly, to show you that they're maturing. I would also promise a reward (NOT $) for good behavior. If the younger listens and is respectful, the older refrains from being bossy/overbearing. As for emergency preparedness, give them all the relevent #'s, and if you have a good friend/neighbor who can show up quickly in case of emergency. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 At that age, yes. BUT it depends on the child. My oldest son no how no way. My 16 yo Dd? Absolutely. But at 16 yes, they can be left for a weekend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 My kids are 18 and 16. I absolutely would leave them home together, but... NOT if I felt I needed to leave one in charge of the other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I would have no problems leaving my dd19 at home with ds14 and dd13 for a weekend. I wouldn't have had a problem with it when she was 18 either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BatmansWife Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I'm actually a little surprised at all the responses that say Yes. I'm gonna have to go the opposite route and say No. I have an 18 year old daughter and a 15 year old son. No way would I leave them home alone for two days...maybe for an afternoon. Both are responsible. But, the two together....nope. They fight too much, unfortunately. But, besides that....I'd be a worry wart the entire time. That's a long time, in my opinion, to be gone. We don't live in the best neighborhood and I would be too concerned, especially at night. More than likely everything will be ok with your kids. If you go....have fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, I would. I would make sure they have a responsible adult that is willing to be on-call, and maybe do a few drive-bys to ensure no partying was happening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I know we left our then 16 yo alone overnight when we were in Europe. That was legal and he was a very cautious kid plus he was about to go away to college. JUst this last weekend, we left our 22, 17 who is about to graduate, and 14 yo home while we went house hunting. The only problem we had was that our 17 yo felt sick while we were away so we told her 14 you sister want to do and it resolved itself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen in PA Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Yes, I would. I would make sure they have a responsible adult that is willing to be on-call, and maybe do a few drive-bys to ensure no partying was happening. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 My mom and dad left us home alone at those ages (even a year younger). We were fine. I don't have kids those ages yet and I definitely depends on track records and the type of kids, but, yes, I would feel okay leaving them home alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TKDmom Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Of course, and pools at the resort. And I think Phoenix cools off at night? Yes it does. I'd expect it to be in the low 70's at night. I rather like AZ, even in the summer. How I miss living somewhere that cools off when the sun goes down... :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 We would and have and will again...Grandma lives next door..Grandpa stops in often...and our neighbors are great. Last week we took the 4 youngest kids away for 4 days and ds 20 stayed here...took care of the pets and did emergency service calls for our plumbing business. Worked out great.... We have also left our adult children home watching the younger ones for up to a week. They loved it, no one got in trouble, they bonded during that time...and they have great memories or their vacation from us. Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brilliant Posted June 1, 2011 Author Share Posted June 1, 2011 I'm actually a little surprised at all the responses that say Yes. I'm gonna have to go the opposite route and say No. I have an 18 year old daughter and a 15 year old son. No way would I leave them home alone for two days...maybe for an afternoon. Both are responsible. But, the two together....nope. They fight too much, unfortunately. But, besides that....I'd be a worry wart the entire time. That's a long time, in my opinion, to be gone. We don't live in the best neighborhood and I would be too concerned, especially at night. More than likely everything will be ok with your kids. If you go....have fun. This wouldn't be a problem for my teens - they are very good friends, and rarely bicker. But I'm with you on the "worry wart" part! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trish Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I guess it depends on the kids. There have been similar situations in our neighborhood with very bad results (parties, police, property damage). But, of course you never hear about the ones with no problem. So, if you trust your kids I guess it would be okay. Are there any boyfriend/girlfriend issues to be concerned about? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theYoungerMrsWarde Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 My grandparent/guardians did not let me stay by myself alone. When I got married (at 18,) I started having panic attacks when I was left alone. Please let your dc do this. Have a friend aware of the situation for back up or something, but let them do this. But also make sure they are prepared. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StephanieZ Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 Sure I would. 18 yo is old enough in my book, unless s/he is particularly irresponsible. I'd expect my kids to be more than competent to take care of themselves and siblings for a few days by 18 yo. (Obviously, I'd have other adults on-call in case of true disaster/emergency, etc. I'd also leave a credit card, $200+ cash, and medical insurance cards in a designated place.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akmommy Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I would, but my 18 yr. Is pretty responsible. The only thing that would make me hesitate leaving a 15 and 18 yr. Old would be wether or not I can trust them and the relationship dynamic between the two (do they generally get along? Will the 15yr old listen to older sibling?). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhgillil Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I was married a month after I turned 19, so I see absolutely no problem with an 18 year old, as long as she is responsible, being in charge of the house and her sibling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 Nope. My family went away for a few days when I was 19 and left me at home alone. I promptly threw a huge party and had my boyfriend sleep over the whole time they were gone. And I was a "good" kid that my parents "trusted". :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I'd also leave a credit card, $200+ cash, and medical insurance cards in a designated place.) Good point! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mothersweets Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 OK, it's unanimous...I'll go...but here's an even more important question: Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100? You betcha!! I can't even get into a pool unless the temperature is at least at 100. But that's just me. :) Go and have fun - the kids will be fine! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 Dh wants me to accompany him on a short (2-night) business trip. Our dd is 18. Yes, I know she can vote and join the military and buy cigarettes...but should we leave her in charge of 15yo ds? I'm honestly not worried about them getting into trouble - the worst is that they will spend more time on the computer than usual, or eat too much junk food. I hope I would be fine with this, and knowing me, if I weren't "fine" with it, I would be too embarrassed to say I wasn't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I have left my ds home alone over a weekend when he was 17 - but he was not in charge of anyone but himself. He knew what to do in case of an ER - everything was fine. He ate a lot of chips...;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 (edited) If I felt I could trust them to be responsible, then of course. I have had 18 year olds that were very trustworthy, but I also have a twenty-something that now lives independently that I would never trust alone in my house. Ever. But, that is because she is a sociopath and that is another story. Really, your perception of your adult child is what counts. No way I would leave a ton of cash and a credit card, however. That is way too tempting even for 'good' kids. And you are only going for a couple days, for heaven's sake what would they need that much cash for that couldn't wait for you to get back? Bail? I'd leave a phone number to contact me and I would set up something with a near-by family member or close friend to step in if hands-on help was needed. I can't imagine why anyone would need a couple hundred dollars and a credit card. Unless you want to pay for a junk food orgy. And why doesn't your 18 year old have his or her own medical insurance card in his or her own wallet in the first place? I don't mean to sound critical, but I am one of 'those' parents who expect my kids to know how to handle themselves independently, including dealing with emergencies, way before the age of even fifteen. I have no patience for hot house kids, having gone on active duty at barely seventeen, married at nineteen, and worked on active duty with many other people the same age who were paragons of responsibilty, mainly because it was simply expected of them. Consequently I simply expect it of my own kids. Edited June 1, 2011 by Rainefox Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Serenade Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I would say yes. I was left alone once around those ages. My parents took my younger sister with them, and I got to invite a trusted family friend (around my age) to spend the weekend with me, so I wouldn't be alone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan in TX Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 I'd do it without thinking twice about it. I went with Dh on a business trip for a week and left my then 18 year old daughter at home in charge of her six younger siblings. The youngest was six. Susan in TX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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