Do you leave young adults home alone?

[Brilliant]

Dh wants me to accompany him on a short (2-night) business trip. Our dd is 18. Yes, I know she can vote and join the military and buy cigarettes...but should we leave her in charge of 15yo ds?

 

I'm honestly not worried about them getting into trouble - the worst is that they will spend more time on the computer than usual, or eat too much junk food. I'm just convinced there will be an earthquake or another disaster while we are gone. :001_huh:

 

I guess our family should have a natural-disaster plan in place anyway. So, assuming we do that - would you leave the teens for 48 hours?

[kchara]

At those ages, I probably would, but you might want to check with your state laws. I wouldn't imagine there would be an issue, but you never know.

[wapiti]

Yes, of course. With lots of rules/instructions.

[Mejane]

.

Edited June 7, 2011 by Mejane

[LidiyaDawn]

18 & 15 for a couple of days? Wouldn't bother me at all. :)

[Samiam]

We are not there yet,

but unless they have given you a reason not to trust them,

I absolutely would at that age.

 

It is good for them to have that bit of "independence" I would think, in a safe zone, ie home.

[In The Great White North]

Yes, I have.

 

I don' think there would be a legal problem either, given their ages.

[oasis]

My parents did this when I was 16 years old, and I was in charge of my other siblings (15, 11, and 9.)

 

My kids are still very young, but I imagine as long as they were trustworthy, I would go (and keep a cell phone nearby!)

[KristinaBreece]

I would say yes... But I bet when we get there, DH would say no. :lol:

[Brilliant]

At those ages, I probably would, but you might want to check with your state laws. I wouldn't imagine there would be an issue, but you never know.

 

There's no specific legal age to be left home alone in CA - and from what I can tell, it would be OK even if a "responsible" 15yo was left in his home with food, etc. So I think adding an 18yo in charge should really make it OK legally. She drives and we'd also leave $$ for emergencies, etc.

[Brilliant]

OK, it's unanimous...I'll go...but here's an even more important question: Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100?

[Plaid Dad]

Assuming both of them are trustworthy, I would have no qualms about leaving them alone.

[In The Great White North]

Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100?

 

Is there air conditioning?

[Brilliant]

Of course, and pools at the resort. And I think Phoenix cools off at night?

[Parrothead]

If your 18-year old had her own place would you let her babysit your 15-year old while you were gone 2-3 days?

[Veritaserum]

I would feel fine about leaving them if there were an on call adult (neighbor, relative, etc.) that could help with an emergency if needed. :)

[Parrothead]

OK, it's unanimous...I'll go...but here's an even more important question: Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100?

Well... yeah. In the pool with a tropical drink in my hand most of the time.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I would feel fine about leaving them if there were an on call adult (neighbor, relative, etc.) that could help with an emergency if needed. :)

 

:iagree:

[catz]

I would. I might assign a neighbor or friend in town that might check in with them a couple times (via phone or in person).

[QueenCat]

Yes.... and I would let my next door neighbor know... not that they'd do anything awful but I know she would just make a point of reminding them that she's available if they need it. Both times we've left one or both, she invited them over for dinner, which was nice. It wasn't why I told her we'd be gone but just the kind of person she is.

[missmoe]

Yes, but I might spend most of my time indoors!

[MamaT]

Yes, of course. With lots of rules/instructions.

 

:iagree:

[DianeW88]

Yep, no worries at all. I've left my older kids alone with my 10 year old for a few days.

[Mommy22alyns]

I'm obviously not there yet, but I would do it. My dad took a couple of short business trips when I was 16-17 and left me on my own for a couple of days. I didn't even throw a house party! :D

 

And Arizona? Sure, with A/C, a pool, and some nice drinks. Have fun!

[LinRTX]

Yes, definitely. I left mine at home with a 14yo and a 7yo when she was 18.

 

Linda

[foxbridgeacademy]

I would say yes, it will give them a chance to act responsibly, to show you that they're maturing. I would also promise a reward (NOT $) for good behavior. If the younger listens and is respectful, the older refrains from being bossy/overbearing. As for emergency preparedness, give them all the relevent #'s, and if you have a good friend/neighbor who can show up quickly in case of emergency.

[justamouse]

At that age, yes. BUT it depends on the child. My oldest son no how no way. My 16 yo Dd? Absolutely. But at 16 yes, they can be left for a weekend.

[Pamela H in Texas]

My kids are 18 and 16. I absolutely would leave them home together, but...

NOT if I felt I needed to leave one in charge of the other.

[Night Elf]

I would have no problems leaving my dd19 at home with ds14 and dd13 for a weekend. I wouldn't have had a problem with it when she was 18 either.

[BatmansWife]

I'm actually a little surprised at all the responses that say Yes. I'm gonna have to go the opposite route and say No. I have an 18 year old daughter and a 15 year old son. No way would I leave them home alone for two days...maybe for an afternoon. Both are responsible. But, the two together....nope. They fight too much, unfortunately. But, besides that....I'd be a worry wart the entire time. That's a long time, in my opinion, to be gone. We don't live in the best neighborhood and I would be too concerned, especially at night. More than likely everything will be ok with your kids. If you go....have fun.

[elegantlion]

Yes, I would. I would make sure they have a responsible adult that is willing to be on-call, and maybe do a few drive-bys to ensure no partying was happening.

[TravelingChris]

I know we left our then 16 yo alone overnight when we were in Europe. That was legal and he was a very cautious kid plus he was about to go away to college. JUst this last weekend, we left our 22, 17 who is about to graduate, and 14 yo home while we went house hunting. The only problem we had was that our 17 yo felt sick while we were away so we told her 14 you sister want to do and it resolved itself.

[Jen in PA]

Yes, I would. I would make sure they have a responsible adult that is willing to be on-call, and maybe do a few drive-bys to ensure no partying was happening.

 

:iagree:

[Desert Rat]

My mom and dad left us home alone at those ages (even a year younger). We were fine. I don't have kids those ages yet and I definitely depends on track records and the type of kids, but, yes, I would feel okay leaving them home alone.

[TKDmom]

Of course, and pools at the resort. And I think Phoenix cools off at night?

 

Yes it does. I'd expect it to be in the low 70's at night. I rather like AZ, even in the summer.

 

How I miss living somewhere that cools off when the sun goes down... :tongue_smilie:

[Mommyfaithe]

We would and have and will again...Grandma lives next door..Grandpa stops in often...and our neighbors are great. Last week we took the 4 youngest kids away for 4 days and ds 20 stayed here...took care of the pets and did emergency service calls for our plumbing business. Worked out great....

We have also left our adult children home watching the younger ones for up to a week. They loved it, no one got in trouble, they bonded during that time...and they have great memories or their vacation from us.

 

Faithe

[Brilliant]

I'm actually a little surprised at all the responses that say Yes. I'm gonna have to go the opposite route and say No. I have an 18 year old daughter and a 15 year old son. No way would I leave them home alone for two days...maybe for an afternoon. Both are responsible. But, the two together....nope. They fight too much, unfortunately. But, besides that....I'd be a worry wart the entire time. That's a long time, in my opinion, to be gone. We don't live in the best neighborhood and I would be too concerned, especially at night. More than likely everything will be ok with your kids. If you go....have fun.

 

This wouldn't be a problem for my teens - they are very good friends, and rarely bicker.

 

But I'm with you on the "worry wart" part!

[Trish]

I guess it depends on the kids. There have been similar situations in our neighborhood with very bad results (parties, police, property damage). But, of course you never hear about the ones with no problem. So, if you trust your kids I guess it would be okay. Are there any boyfriend/girlfriend issues to be concerned about?

[theYoungerMrsWarde]

My grandparent/guardians did not let me stay by myself alone. When I got married (at 18,) I started having panic attacks when I was left alone. Please let your dc do this. Have a friend aware of the situation for back up or something, but let them do this. But also make sure they are prepared.

[StephanieZ]

Sure I would. 18 yo is old enough in my book, unless s/he is particularly irresponsible. I'd expect my kids to be more than competent to take care of themselves and siblings for a few days by 18 yo.

 

(Obviously, I'd have other adults on-call in case of true disaster/emergency, etc. I'd also leave a credit card, $200+ cash, and medical insurance cards in a designated place.)

[akmommy]

I would, but my 18 yr. Is pretty responsible. The only thing that would make me hesitate leaving a 15 and 18 yr. Old would be wether or not I can trust them and the relationship dynamic between the two (do they generally get along? Will the 15yr old listen to older sibling?).

[mhgillil]

I was married a month after I turned 19, so I see absolutely no problem with an 18 year old, as long as she is responsible, being in charge of the house and her sibling.

[Heather in Neverland]

Nope. My family went away for a few days when I was 19 and left me at home alone. I promptly threw a huge party and had my boyfriend sleep over the whole time they were gone. And I was a "good" kid that my parents "trusted". :tongue_smilie:

[Jean in Newcastle]

I'd also leave a credit card, $200+ cash, and medical insurance cards in a designated place.)

 

Good point!

[Mothersweets]

OK, it's unanimous...I'll go...but here's an even more important question: Would you go spend a couple of days at a resort in Phoenix when the temp is forecast at 100?

 

You betcha!! I can't even get into a pool unless the temperature is at least at 100. But that's just me. :)

 

Go and have fun - the kids will be fine!

[kalanamak]

Dh wants me to accompany him on a short (2-night) business trip. Our dd is 18. Yes, I know she can vote and join the military and buy cigarettes...but should we leave her in charge of 15yo ds?

 

I'm honestly not worried about them getting into trouble - the worst is that they will spend more time on the computer than usual, or eat too much junk food.

 

I hope I would be fine with this, and knowing me, if I weren't "fine" with it, I would be too embarrassed to say I wasn't.

[Liz CA]

I have left my ds home alone over a weekend when he was 17 - but he was not in charge of anyone but himself. He knew what to do in case of an ER - everything was fine. He ate a lot of chips...;)

[Tarreymere]

If I felt I could trust them to be responsible, then of course. I have had 18 year olds that were very trustworthy, but I also have a twenty-something that now lives independently that I would never trust alone in my house. Ever. But, that is because she is a sociopath and that is another story.

 

Really, your perception of your adult child is what counts. No way I would leave a ton of cash and a credit card, however. That is way too tempting even for 'good' kids. And you are only going for a couple days, for heaven's sake what would they need that much cash for that couldn't wait for you to get back? Bail?

 

I'd leave a phone number to contact me and I would set up something with a near-by family member or close friend to step in if hands-on help was needed. I can't imagine why anyone would need a couple hundred dollars and a credit card. Unless you want to pay for a junk food orgy. And why doesn't your 18 year old have his or her own medical insurance card in his or her own wallet in the first place?

 

I don't mean to sound critical, but I am one of 'those' parents who expect my kids to know how to handle themselves independently, including dealing with emergencies, way before the age of even fifteen. I have no patience for hot house kids, having gone on active duty at barely seventeen, married at nineteen, and worked on active duty with many other people the same age who were paragons of responsibilty, mainly because it was simply expected of them. Consequently I simply expect it of my own kids.

Edited June 1, 2011 by Rainefox

[Serenade]

I would say yes.

 

I was left alone once around those ages. My parents took my younger sister with them, and I got to invite a trusted family friend (around my age) to spend the weekend with me, so I wouldn't be alone.

[Susan in TX]

I'd do it without thinking twice about it. I went with Dh on a business trip for a week and left my then 18 year old daughter at home in charge of her six younger siblings. The youngest was six.

 

Susan in TX