Do you make your kids walk?

[Allearia]

When do you make your kids walk? This is mostly about a young teen. He would really prefer if I gave him a ride all the time. But presuming good weather, safe streets, daytime, etc. Would you make your teen walk or take public transit to activities, even if you have time and could drive them? Or do you think it is valuable for them to be self sufficient and get to and from places on their own even if it takes them more time and effort?

[Tanaqui]

If we had a car, I'd still make the girls walk places. Gasoline costs money, and so does my time. Plus, walking helps people build up mental maps - if you don't travel on your own, your mental map of the place you live is less clear.

[Melissa B]

I generally give my teens a ride in the morning if I have the time. That way they can sleep in and/or not worry about being late, as public transit times can vary. They are usually expected to find their own ways home - either walking, finding a ride or taking the bus.

[HomeAgain]

I don't make mine. He doesn't mind it for the most part, except going to school. LOL He'd rather leave on his time than wait for me to be available.

 

In our area it is hard to be self sufficient as a non driver. I'm kinda glad he has two or three places he can go on his own.

[Bluegoat]

Yes, I would make them walk or use transit so long as it wasn't really unreasonable.  I think that self-sufficiency goes a long way in creating comfort with independance.  Last school year I started getting my dd11 to walk a lot more places herself, probably the farthest being the strip mall or her violin lesson which are both about 1.5 km.  Next year, I am thinking about having her take some short bus trips alone too.

 

We are lucky we live where it is possible to walk many places and there are really good bus routes that go down our street.  I am not going to be tied to transporting four kids around everywhere.

 

 

[Daria]

I don't have a car, but I do spring for uber sometimes to get my teen places.  He still walks and takes public transportation a lot.  

 

I'm thinking of surprising him with a bike to alleviate some of the walking.

[NorthwestMom]

Yes, I would make them walk or use transit so long as it wasn't really unreasonable.  I think that self-sufficiency goes a long way in creating comfort with independance.  Last school year I started getting my dd11 to walk a lot more places herself, probably the farthest being the strip mall or her violin lesson which are both about 1.5 km.  Next year, I am thinking about having her take some short bus trips alone too.

 

We are lucky we live where it is possible to walk many places and there are really good bus routes that go down our street.  I am not going to be tied to transporting four kids around everywhere.

 

:iagree:

 

It is so much healthier to get in the habit of walking, riding a bike, etc. than to drive or be driven everywhere. Also, I want my kids to be comfortable and confident when they are on their own, so I give them lots of opportunities to build those skills.

[Bluegoat]

:iagree:

 

It is so much healthier to get in the habit of walking, riding a bike, etc. than to drive or be driven everywhere. Also, I want my kids to be comfortable and confident when they are on their own, so I give them lots of opportunities to build those skills.

 

I became very concious of this when my younger sister was in high school - she went to a private school where most of the kids were driven.  They were going on an outing as a group to a Mexican place, for her Spanish class, and the kids in the class were all trying to figure out how they would get there.  She pointed out it was about four blocks away, and if necessary a bus route went directly in between the two places. 

 

I really preferred the bus in middle school, if I could possibly make it work, I hated having my parents into all of my business.  Not that it was bad business, I just wanted to have some agency of my own.

[Ottakee]

Absolutely walk, esp home. I might take them there if it was a long distance...like several miles but otherwise they can walk or ride a bike. Healthy habit.

 

I wish we had more walkable areas near us.

[poppy]

My kids are young enough, I thought this was going to be about what age you stop using strollers, lol.

Though now that mine are both well past that age, boy do I miss the ease of strapping them in and going on my way.

 

[marbel]

Our neighborhood is walkable but the area surrounding us is not.   Public transit is terrible.  So, few places my kids can walk.

 

But, both got summer jobs close to home - my daughter walks (1/2 mile), and my son rides his bike (1 mile).  When it is super hot or rainy I drive them, though.  I would love for them to be able to walk or ride more places.

 

ETA: Few places to ride bikes, too.  Lots of roads will suddenly narrow, with little to no shoulder.  Bike lanes are almost nonexistent.  People do ride on those roads, but it is harrowing.

Edited July 11, 2016 by marbel

[Meriwether]

We live five miles out, so I drive them.

[regentrude]

Yes.  Not always, but for distances under 2.5 miles, I often let them walk or bike. 

I walked my kids to school for 6 years: a bit more than 0.5 mile to the elementary, 1 mile to the middle school. We were the only family on our street who did not drive to school; it was ridiculous. 

When they came to the office with me, 2.5 miles, we sometimes biked all together. If I drove, they could come with me, but if they wanted to be independent and leave on their own and not wait for me, they had to bike.

Anything further or at night, I drove. The barn where DD rode is 9 miles out of town on a windy, hilly country road; no way would I make her bike there. 

 

 

[myfunnybunch]

My teens have bus passes and bikes. Assuming that the destination is accessible by either/both....Sometimes they get themselves around. Sometimes I drive the boys anyway. Sometimes I drop a kid (and sometimes bike) and he bikes/busses home. Sometimes they walk places.

 

We go for family bike rides too. Partly for fun family time, and partly so places seem accessible by bike. I can say, "The Y is just over the hill from the ice cream shop," and they realize their destination is already a mostly familiar route.

[Allearia]

Yes. Not always, but for distances under 2.5 miles, I often let them walk or bike.

I walked my kids to school for 6 years: a bit more than 0.5 mile to the elementary, 1 mile to the middle school. We were the only family on our street who did not drive to school; it was ridiculous.

When they came to the office with me, 2.5 miles, we sometimes biked all together. If I drove, they could come with me, but if they wanted to be independent and leave on their own and not wait for me, they had to bike.

Anything further or at night, I drove. The barn where DD rode is 9 miles out of town on a windy, hilly country road; no way would I make her bike there.

This was what I was going to ask next, how far do you make them walk?

 

My son complains about a ten minute walk home from the train station. Sometimes he has just been in class for hours and walked to the train and I will pick him up. Other times, he is just being lazy, but I still feel mean when I am just sitting home reading a book.

[myfunnybunch]

Yes. Not always, but for distances under 2.5 miles, I often let them walk or bike.

I walked my kids to school for 6 years: a bit more than 0.5 mile to the elementary, 1 mile to the middle school. We were the only family on our street who did not drive to school; it was ridiculous.

When my girls were in school, we were the only family on our street who walked. Even in the rain! (Raincoats.) Even when it was cold! (Hats and mittens.) Even though a bus would have picked up my child with autism for free! (????)

 

The school is 1/4 mile away, if that.

 

I have a super hard time not getting my judgey pants on about that.

[catz]

We live in a walkable neighborhood.  My kids walk sometimes.  Especially my 15 year old.  He knows how to use transit now too.  That said, I drive a bunch too.  It's not a hill to die on.  Sometimes we don't have the 30-60 minutes+ it would take to walk as good as that would be.

[regentrude]

This was what I was going to ask next, how far do you make them walk?

 

Not more than I would personally feel worth walking either.

I don't walk to get to a place if it takes me longer than half an hour one way, unless I have no alternative. So, about 1.5 miles.

I love walking for recreation and go for longer walks on most evenings and hike on weekends, but I do not find it practical to walk 45 minutes to work if I can drive it in five. 

 

(unless it snowed and I cannot be sure the road will be plowed; then I walk to be on time for my 8am class.)

[Murphy101]

If it is safe and they are physically able, then my teens walk. I don't make them. It's just what able-bodied people in this house do. I don't necessarily mind giving them a ride, but baring weather or time constraints, they'd just as likely prefer to walk.

 

ETA: I'm confused. I have no idea what public transit has to do with walking to or from somewhere. That's not walking. That's getting a ride?

 

There's little to no public transit here and a taxi would be crazy expensive.

Edited July 11, 2016 by Murphy101

[K&Rs Mom]

 Or do you think it is valuable for them to be self sufficient and get to and from places on their own even if it takes them more time and effort?

 

This is how I feel.  When middle dd tried public school, about a mile away, she walked both ways most of the time (age 9-10).  It's no coincidence her personal best 5K time was that winter, after "training" that way for three months.  Same kid rides her bike to soccer (2 miles each way) and tennis (1 mile).  Older dd walked to/from her classes most days, unless I happened to be out around that time and I'd drive.  

 

But we start when they're tiny.  My 2.5yo has no problem going a mile or more around town (with me, of course).  We live in a small town, so as soon as they're able to cross streets alone (around 7yo) they love being able to go to the playground or library on their own.  It makes them feel very grown up. 

[regentrude]

ETA: I'm confused. I have no idea what public transit has to do with walking to or from somewhere. That's not walking. That's getting a ride?

 

 

It is relevant when it comes to the issue of independence and self sufficiency, i.e. not having to depend on a parent for transportation - which, I understood to be the point of the OP, rather than the sole physical act of walking.

Edited July 11, 2016 by regentrude

[Allearia]

If it is safe and they are physically able, then my teens walk. I don't make them. It's just what able-bodied people in this house do. I don't necessarily mind giving them a ride, but baring weather or time constraints, they'd just as likely prefer to walk.

 

ETA: I'm confused. I have no idea what public transit has to do with walking to or from somewhere. That's not walking. That's getting a ride?

 

There's little to no public transit here and a taxi would be crazy expensive.

Well, public transit takes longer than me driving them, and then they have to walk to catch the bus or train. But it is more a question of being self sufficient rather than getting exercise. So should I make them take the train, even if I am just sitting home with a book or doing something non urgent? Or should I drive them so they can save, say up to an extra 30 minutes, usually less.

[Rosie_0801]

It depends where you live. I was entirely responsible for getting myself to school from age 12, which meant leaving the house at 6.30 to get to the bus stop that would take me to the school bus stop, then sitting there for half an hour by myself waiting for everyone else to show up. We finally arrived at school at 10 to 9.

[FaithManor]

For distances up to a mile or so they walk in decent weather. Our roads are narrow, badly kept rural roads with lots of opportunities to hydroplane during wet weather and no shoulders plus big drainage ditches, and very icy in winter. Too easy to be hit by a car. For distances larger and up to around six miles one way, they bike and again, only in good weather. So they get that exercise regularly from mid-April to say November though we tend to have a lot of rain in autumn thus fewer good days than in spring and summer.

 

When we went to church a quarter mile away, we walked as a family as long as it wasn't bitter cold, storming, or icy.

[Crimson Wife]

If we lived where I grew up, absolutely.

 

Where we live now has too much crime. My neighborhood is upper-middle-class but since we moved here there still have been attempted rapes, armed carjackings, armed robberies, and even the occasional drive-by shooting (!) The 'burbs aren't what they used to be sadly enough :crying:

[trulycrabby]

We don't have public transportation, so we walk as part of our homeschool and call it PE. Luckily, we live in a lovely area with a lake and lots of wildlife, so it's common to see waterfowl, snakes, beavers, and sometimes bald eagles. Our walks are about 3.5 miles, and we walk about three days per week. DS12 says it's his favourite part of homeschooling and how much he is going to miss it when he starts private school in August.

[Julie Smith]

We all walk pretty much ever where, so even when Eldest turns 13 that wouldn't change. 

 

Even though the car is in the driveway we walk to:

- Work (well Dh takes the bus, but he use to walk or bike)

- Grocery shopping

- Dentist

- Othodontist

- Grocery Shopping

- Running club

- Restaurants

- Dancing (Well Dh and I)

- Doctor ... 

 

Pretty much we drive if we are carrying a heavy load, or (40 pounds of grocery and library books don't count as heavy) it takes longer the 30 minutes. But then we would usually bike or Dh would take the bus. Well we have never walked to the hospital. :p So since we don't even drive places I can't imagine our kids asking for, or when they are older driving to places within walking distance. 

 

ETA: How do you get to places? Do you drive to places that you would ask your child to walk/bus to? 

Edited July 11, 2016 by Julie Smith

[terrikuns]

 

ETA: How do you get to places? Do you drive to places that you would ask your child to walk/bus to? 

 

We drive everywhere except to a friend's house in the neighborhood and the piano teacher, also in the neighborhood (about 1/3 mi). We live in a suburban subdivision, so when you leave our neighborhood, it's a two-lane road without shoulders, bike lanes, or sidewalks with big ditches on the side. The nearest non-house thing we could walk to is a gas station, Subway, and CVS about 1.5mi away, but there's no point in walking to the gas station, we don't frequent Subway, and I think I go to CVS about three times a year. Plus, it's still the no sidewalk/no shoulder thing. 

 

We consider that we live close to a lot of things - our YMCA is about a 7min drive (about 2.5mi, I think); our church is a 15 min drive; my husband drives about 15-20 min to work; the library is a 10min drive. But there is nothing in walking distance to which we would walk, which was the case where I grew up and in an awful lot of places as well. It's all about where you live.

 

Oh, and the nearest bus stop is near the gas station, so about 1.5mi away, and would be so ludicrously more time consuming than driving that I've never even considered it.

[zoobie]

There's not anything within walking distance. There are grocery stores two plus miles away in several directions, but only one direction has sidewalks on the major streets. There's a bus stop a little over a mile away, but the bus situation here isn't safe for my kids' ages. I would probably feel uncomfortable at my age (not very busy, buses unpredictable, etc.) right around here. If we lived in an area with reliable transport, yes, they would.

[musicianmom]

*

Edited May 21, 2022 by musicianmom

[Joker]

There's not a whole lot within a safe walking distance where we are now. I definitely drive them to school since it starts at 7:30am (high school). The time they would have to get up and leave otherwise is ridiculous.

 

They can walk around the neighborhood all they want but it doesn't actually go anywhere.

[nd293]

Dd15 is now at a school a 25 min drive from us. It would take about 90 minutes and 3 buses to get there. It makes more sense for me to drive her, especially in the mornings. I do have her use public transport a few times a week though, to save me the afternoon drive and allow ds9 to have afternoon play dates. Then she walks to a train station near her school and catches the train to a stop a 12 min drive from home, and I collect her from there. I usually have her take the train if she's meeting friends at the mall too. When I opt for her to use public transport it is either because there is a clash of schedules or because during after work rush hour the 25 min drive to her school (which is also where the mall is located) can takes at least 35 min. However, since she intimated that maybe it was 'expected' that I lift her as I don't work outside the home the frequency with which I expect her to take public transport has definitely gone up.

[Arcadia]

My DS11 and DS10 walk and take public transit with me because I don't drive. They find it more fun than waiting for my hubby to finish work and drive us home.

 

My hubby also loves public transit so we sometimes take public transit instead of drive on weekends. We have two bus stops nearby as well as a light rail station nearby. Hubby's employer also gives a small monthly public transport allowance to encourage employees to use public transit to get to and from work.

[Guest]

I am 25 miles (via country highways) from anything except a grocery store, a barber shop and some random mom-and-pops.  There is no public transportation anywhere. If DS wants to walk to those places, he's more than welcome to.  But I'm not going to make him walk to anything else :lol:

[Tap]

There isn't really anywhere to walk to in our area.  The kids schools are all more than 5 miles away and their sport practices were 5 to 30 miles away, so that wasn't really an option either.  We are in the county,  just outside the upper corner of a city.  Public transportation will only take you south-west from my  house. Pretty much all the kids activities are  in the other directions.  When we go into Portland Oregon, we always park the car and walk the city.  The kids have grown up with this and don't think anything of walking distances when it is reasonable to do so. 

 

DS17 used to walk to the 1/2 to 1 mile to the bus stop to take the bus to work at 16yo.  Otherwise he would bike the distance which is about 4 miles or so each way.   When he was older, he rode the bus to college because they had horrible-limited parking and it only took him about 15 extra minutes to get there via bus and he could study on the ride.  It was also wayyyyy cheaper to get a student bus pass than pay for parking. He stopped riding once he changed to a college that was too far to bike or ride public transportation to.  But he still goes for a bike ride, of about 5 miles almost every day just for a bit of planned, daily exercise.

 

DD17 hasn't ridden the public bus.  She hasn't really had any activities that were within a reasonable distance to bus or walk too.   Her and her friends used to walk to a gas station for treats all the time. That was about 1.5 miles away.  And a few times she did walk home from school, but that was several miles on a road that wasn't walking friendly..   Several times per week, she and her friend go and walk walking trails and don't twice at walking 5+ miles.

 

I wouldn't think much of having a teen walk or ride a mile or two, but more than that tends to eat up the day.  Between school and sports my kids don't have much down time as it is, so I wouldn't make them walk somewhere that took an hour, when I could drive them in 10 minutes.

 

Edited July 11, 2016 by Tap

[SKL]

My kids walk when it makes sense.  Which is unfortunately limited by the design of our suburb.  They can walk to some friends' houses and to the nearest park.  I do encourage this, though it was iffy when they were younger due to "other people's opinions."  :/

 

I also have my kids walk from one activity to another when it makes sense - which happens only occasionally.

 

My kids walk to the school bus stop, but that's not even half a mile away.  Their school is 5 miles away, so forget walking there ....

 

Together, we walk a lot when we travel and stuff.  Several miles at a stretch is normal and comfortable for us at those times.  But normally I can't fit leisurely walks into my schedule.

 

They don't use public transit because we don't live near a bus stop, and I always drive so they have almost no experience with our local transit system.  If they had experience with it and it was close, I would let them use it.

[almondbutterandjelly]

No.  My neighborhood is riddled with sex offenders.  Our part of town also has a high homeless population who tend to not respect boundaries, be mentally ill, and often drug addicts of some sort.

 

We drive our dd, and soon she will drive herself.  Plus we are more of a suburb, which is not set up much for walking.  And we live right by the highway.

 

Heck, our mall bathroom isn't safe.  There are human drug trafficking rings around.  Even our Target bathroom has had child molesters around it.  

 

You all must live in much nicer places than me.  And I live in a nice place, actually.  With its fair share of scum.

 

 

[SKL]

My parents pretty much never took us anywhere; they worked.  We always walked to school.  I rode my bike to the summer enrichment program out in the boonies.  We walked to whatever we did outside of school.  Even when we were in sports we walked to the practices that were held at the city rec area several miles away.  I must have hopped a ride with another kid for away games, because my parents didn't come to games.  By age 9 or 10, I took the bus to my eye doctor appointments while my folks were at work, and I would take the bus around for fun if I had the money to waste on it.  :)  When I was 12, we moved to a rural village, and we had no boundaries on where we could go or how we could get there.

[bettyandbob]

I expect my kids to get places under 2 miles walking. If I really can't help they will walk further.

 

When ds was in public high school we did drive him there. He walked home. School started pretty early 7:15.

[Desert Strawberry]

We are rural-and it's 115 degrees out-so walking isn't really an option. 

[Murphy101]

It depends where you live. I was entirely responsible for getting myself to school from age 12, which meant leaving the house at 6.30 to get to the bus stop that would take me to the school bus stop, then sitting there for half an hour by myself waiting for everyone else to show up. We finally arrived at school at 10 to 9.

This was dh and I as well. And many if not most kids we knew. We all were expected to get ourselves up, ready and out in time to walk to the bus stop, usually no more than a block or two away, and wait in whatever elements happened for the bus. And repeat on the way back home. Only the extremely pampered kids had parents take them directly to school and pic them up. And I was in a new school, suburban school district in elementary school. After about 2nd grade, neither of us remember anyone helping them do that unless they were SN.

 

I don't think any of us considered it "walking" somewhere though. I mean, it's to a bus stop. It's not like we were reliving Little House on the Prairie walking to school. Though we did sometimes walk to school if we missed the bus. It was about 2 miles away and truth be told we could sleep in a bit if we skipped the whole bus picking up everyone routine and just walk directly there ourselves. Parents were at work, so there was no one at home waiting to give a ride.

 

Dh at least had a bike. He rode his bike to other nearby towns in elementary school.

 

I walked all over the city. Several miles one way on any given day in just about any weather.

 

None of this was considered a hardship or mean or anything. We were kids and it was just normal. If we wanted to visit friend or hang out, it meant we had to walk to where they lived or to where we could hang out.

 

Anything within 3 miles, my kids over 10 can and do walk. It's hit or miss if I go with them lately bc pregnancy generates enough heat, so I wuss out. But as long as they have water, communication, and I'm familiar with the area and goal destination - no problem.

 

But we don't even use strollers like I see so many people doing these days. I've been seeing people with 4 year olds in strollers just to go to Walmart. I don't really care, but it's not something we ever considered doing. If they can walk - they are expected to walk. I don't even keep the stroller in the van unless I'm going somewhere I think they will have to walk more than an hour or so. Like the zoo with a baby or 2 year old. I haven't used our stroller at all with our five year old in at least 2 years. I think he would be really insulted if I asked him to get in the stroller now. LOL

[Rosie_0801]

Nope, would not make my kids do this...even at say, 15 vs 12.  Getting to school on time is more important than teaching indepenance that way. 

 

That was how I got to school on time. School started at 9. My mother couldn't get me to school at 9am 40mins away from where my younger siblings needed to be at school at 9am, nor could she have afforded the petrol. A walk and a bus or two is pretty normal for most high school kids in the outer suburbs.

[KungFuPanda]

I even make the kid who can't walk "walk." We walked to the grocery store the other day. He wanted to drive because it was "too hot." I don't think there's really such a thing as "too hot" to walk for ten minutes. I walked. He drove his power wheelchair. He got fresh air and nobody passed out from heatstroke. We were out of the house for maybe half an hour. This kid prefers the indoors so I have to push outside stuff.

[mamiof5]

No I don't, at all. I'm just paranoid about certain things, like one of our "main" neighborhood streets... it's supposed to be 25mph, people usually go 40 or more. It's so curvy that when you see a car coming towards you at that speed it might be too late.

 

Anyway, traffic is just one reason...for many others I just don't.

 

ETA: we encourage walking in other ways. Hiking, backpacking (when the weather permits...our summer is around 108-110 or sometimes higher)

Edited July 11, 2016 by mamiof5

[Joyofsixreboot]

We don't have public transport but if it's within a couple miles my kids bike or walk about 8. A young teen definitely could use their feet.

[The Girls' Mom]

When we lived in the city, my kids did walk to a few places that were close and safe (the library, Sonic, etc.).  They were young teens/preteens at the time.  Here? No.  For one, we don't live close to anything.  It would take an hour to walk to the nearest gas station.  For another, the highway we live on isn't safe for walking/biking.  (no shoulder, speeding vehicles, lots of large dump trucks, etc.)  There is no public transportation.  

 

This is why we have four vehicles, soon to be 5, just so everyone can get to their job/school.

[kewb]

Mine walk as much as is reasonable. We don't have good mass transit so it is either drive or walk.

 

Traffic and sidewalks makes a difference.

 

They walk to friends houses, the local stores, and to work. I will drive them a workable distance if it is convenient for me.

[SparklyUnicorn]

My older kid walks and takes the bus and 99% of the time refuses any ride offers.  At this point I would not make him do that though. 

 

 

[DawnM]

If we could walk to anything or take public transportation I would.

We make our 18 year old take the bus to his community college, but the bus stop is 10 miles away, so we do drive him to the bus stop to go the remaining 9 miles into the city.

 

But we live far out, and there is nothing to walk to, unless you are willing to walk over 4 miles on a very busy road with no sidewalks.  Grown men have been killed riding bikes on that road.  4 miles away there is a shopping area with a few restaurants and stores.  I drive them.

Edited July 11, 2016 by DawnM

[SparklyUnicorn]

This was what I was going to ask next, how far do you make them walk?

 

My son complains about a ten minute walk home from the train station. Sometimes he has just been in class for hours and walked to the train and I will pick him up. Other times, he is just being lazy, but I still feel mean when I am just sitting home reading a book.

 

10 minutes is not a big deal at all