Let's talk about going gray

[GWOB]

I've had a bit of gray since I was 27. Luckily, those first grays came in at the back of my head underneath the rest of my hair. The grays are now migrating to the top of my head:glare:. I can't pass them off as platinum highlights as I have never been blonde.

 

I've been dyeing my hair since I was 15. It has been every shade of red, purple, orange, black, and brown. I'm tired of dyeing my hair.

 

I'm only 32. I still get carded to buy tobacco and alcohol. I'm not sure if I'm ready to go gray, but I just do not look forward to the maintenance required to fight the little snots.

 

I have a friend who has beautiful salt-and-pepper hair. She's under 40 and totally rocks the gray. Maybe I could pull off the gray look too. My grays are almost silver, which I could live with.

 

So, what do you guys do with the gray devils? Give me some ideas.

[QueenCat]

My gray makes me look old.... I go to the salon every 6 weeks for a color & cut. I'm not a normally vain person.... except about this... I do not like being asked if I'm the grandmother of my friends younger kids. I'm not asked that now that I get good cuts/coloring.

[Reflections]

So, what do you guys do with the gray devils? Give me some ideas.

 

I pretend they are "highlights".:glare:

[peachskittles]

I will be dyeing my hair. I know that I should embrace it, blah blah blah, but ugh, it doesn't become me at all. Ask me in a few years if I've changed my mind. I'm roughly the same age as you so I completely understand.

[KatieJ]

Highlighted my hair to lighten it up for a few years.

When the first Grandchild came along, I quit.

 

I was closer to 50 than 40 at that point.

[Joker]

It's weird because they just don't bother me. I feel like I've earned them. I've never colored my hair and (at least at this time) have no plans to start. Dh has quite a bit now too and I actually really like it. :tongue_smilie:

 

ETA: If it matters, I'm 35 and dh is 40.

[LibraryLover]

I know women with gorgeous gray hair. I love it on them.

 

That said, I highlight so any gray is bended. I think it looks great on friends, but I really don't have the skin tone to pass it off.

[Alenee]

I have some at the sides and in my scalp and I have naturally dark hair. I've decided to 'own it'. Dyeing my hair would take to much time and expense. I'd rather do other things with that money so I'll just make sure I like my hairstyle. :)

[AStableBeginning]

I pretend they are "highlights".:glare:

 

:iagree::D

[a27mom]

I had my first greys when I was 18, that is 20 yrs ago now. It stilled generally looked brown for yrs. but My dh noticed the other day that my hair is getting more greys. He was nice about it. I don't look forward to being grey, but I have never colored my hair and have no desire to start. I can barely remember to get my haircut every 3 to 6 months. So I will probably just deal with it. I'll probably be confused for my kids grandma

[Scrub Jay]

I haven't gone gray yet (I'm 37) but 1-2 times a year a random gray hair will show up. It's horribly ugly because it looks like straw.

 

I think I can actually handle the change to gray OK but my concern is the texture. Will my entire head look scraggly and like straw?? That's what worries me. Anyone BTDT?

[Susan in TN]

I've never died my hair, though I could probably use it. I know I'd never keep up with it and it would end up looking horrible beyond words.

 

So my gray is coming fast and furious now and I just hold to the hope that it will all be a beautiful white in a few years and look fabulous. :D

[SKL]

I sport them with pride. I too have shiny silver whities instead of dull grays. They are dispersed all around my hair and there's a white streak up front, still mostly hidden by darker hair, but peeking out from time to time. :001_smile: I've been sporting whities for at least 15 years, but most people don't notice them unless I mention them. (I'm 46 now.)

 

I never have colored my hair, and I don't plan on starting now!

 

My mom is going on 70, got her first whities at 17, and still has more darks than whities; you don't get the impression that she's a white-haired old lady. She too does not color her hair.

[NittanyJen]

On one side of my family, everyone goes white by age 30. On the other side-- well, people assumed Mom was dying her hair, as she didn't even sprout her first grays until around 73 (she is now all gray). I seem to have received a mix-- I am in my 40's and I have a few dozen grays blended into my brown hair opposite my part.

 

I don't worry about it. I look younger than most of my friends, grays and all. Frankly, I think the gray looks awesome-- I've earned it, along with the life lessons I've learned along the way.

 

 

 

I've had a bit of gray since I was 27. Luckily, those first grays came in at the back of my head underneath the rest of my hair. The grays are now migrating to the top of my head:glare:. I can't pass them off as platinum highlights as I have never been blonde.

 

I've been dyeing my hair since I was 15. It has been every shade of red, purple, orange, black, and brown. I'm tired of dyeing my hair.

 

I'm only 32. I still get carded to buy tobacco and alcohol. I'm not sure if I'm ready to go gray, but I just do not look forward to the maintenance required to fight the little snots.

 

I have a friend who has beautiful salt-and-pepper hair. She's under 40 and totally rocks the gray. Maybe I could pull off the gray look too. My grays are almost silver, which I could live with.

 

So, what do you guys do with the gray devils? Give me some ideas.

[Danestress]

I am 45 and pretty heavily gray. My natural color was a dark brown, so maintenance was getting hard - I very quickly had a "line of demarcation" after having it colored.

 

It is aging though. THere is no question about it. If you go gray, you will seem older to everyone. I mostly just embrace it. I fuss more over my makeup and clothes, and I struggle to maintain my weight because I am just not ready to have an over all "Matronly look." The gray hair is enough! People are nicer to you, though, when you are gray. I have felt a remarkable difference. I tell people I want to look as old as I feel so that people will expect less of me:)

 

My advice is that unless you have really dark hair and simply can't maintain it, or unless you simply long to be gray and are 60% there, just get highlights to blend it every few months. In your 30s, it's nice to just keep your hair youthful. You have the rest of your life to be gray if you want.

 

Also, I am thinking about entering the job market again, and at my age, the gray is a liability. I think that is the case. I am not going to change it. The year of growing the gray out was absolutely the worst. I looked horrible for a year, and now that it's all grown out, I am done.

[Amy in NH]

I promised myself I would never dye my hair. I'm 40 this year and I have quite a bit of gray coming in at the temples. I'm most concerned that the texture of the gray hairs is more wiry, but I guess that's life. DH is only a couple years older than me and he has quite a bit of gray too, so it's all good. :)

[GWOB]

I pretend they are "highlights".:glare:

 

:lol: My dh swears he has platinum highlights, not gray hair. He can pull it off since 1) he is a man and 2) he had white blonde hair as a kid.

I know women with gorgeous gray hair. I love it on them.

 

That said, I highlight so any gray is bended. I think it looks great on friends, but I really don't have the skin tone to pass it off.

 

So what is a good skin tone with gray hair? I am lighter skinned, but have olive tones. My dad is often mistaken for Mexican, Arab, or mixed.

I sport them with pride. I too have shiny silver whities instead of dull grays. They are dispersed all around my hair and there's a white streak up front, still mostly hidden by darker hair, but peeking out from time to time. :001_smile: I've been sporting whities for at least 15 years, but most people don't notice them unless I mention them. (I'm 46 now.)

 

I never have colored my hair, and I don't plan on starting now!

 

My mom is going on 70, got her first whities at 17, and still has more darks than whities; you don't get the impression that she's a white-haired old lady. She too does not color her hair.

 

See, my grays seem shiny and silver. I can handle silver. Dull gray bothers me.

[LibraryLover]

Love your siggy. lol

 

I think olive skin tone works well with gray, plus blue eyes. I know someone who is mostly Italian, and has blue eyes. She looks fab gray.

[GWOB]

I am 45 and pretty heavily gray. My natural color was a dark brown, so maintenance was getting hard - I very quickly had a "line of demarcation" after having it colored.

 

I want to avoid that "line of demarcation".:lol:

 

It is aging though. THere is no question about it. If you go gray, you will seem older to everyone. I mostly just embrace it. I fuss more over my makeup and clothes, and I struggle to maintain my weight because I am just not ready to have an over all "Matronly look." The gray hair is enough! People are nicer to you, though, when you are gray. I have felt a remarkable difference. I tell people I want to look as old as I feel so that people will expect less of me:)

 

I look forward to aging. Everyone thinks it's cute when a little old lady curses. If I curse? No one thinks it's cute:tongue_smilie:.

 

My advice is that unless you have really dark hair and simply can't maintain it, or unless you simply long to be gray and are 60% there, just get highlights to blend it every few months. In your 30s, it's nice to just keep your hair youthful. You have the rest of your life to be gray if you want.

 

My hair is naturally medium to dary brown. It does get a little reddish in the sun, but it's generally a lovely mousy brown.

 

Also, I am thinking about entering the job market again, and at my age, the gray is a liability. I think that is the case. I am not going to change it. The year of growing the gray out was absolutely the worst. I looked horrible for a year, and now that it's all grown out, I am done.

 

My youngest is 5. I have a long way to go before I enter the job market. If I make it through the raising of these kids, I just don't think I will give a flip what people think of me:lol:.

 

I just cannot decide what to do about my "highlights". I consider my multitude of stretch marks to be tiger stripes. I earned every last one of those buggers. I want to feel the same way about my gray hair.

 

I kinda wish I was a man. Men look so distinguished with gray hair. Women just look/feel old.

[GWOB]

Love your siggy. lol

 

I think olive skin tone works well with gray, plus blue eyes. I know someone who is mostly Italian, and has blue eyes. She looks fab gray.

 

Yay! I have blue/green eyes and light olive skin! This gives me hope.

[LibraryLover]

Have you seen this?

 

https://www.google.com/search?q=gray-haired+beauties&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=9gF&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=ELaIUKPcMIze8ATOyIGQBQ&ved=0CAoQ_AUoAQ&biw=1280&bih=878

[SKL]

I kinda wish I was a man. Men look so distinguished with gray hair. Women just look/feel old.

 

I had a secretary whose salt-and-pepper was so attractive, it took me a long time to figure out that she didn't pay to have it colored that way. You never know!

[GWOB]

Have you seen this?

 

https://www.google.com/search?q=gray-haired+beauties&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=9gF&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=ELaIUKPcMIze8ATOyIGQBQ&ved=0CAoQ_AUoAQ&biw=1280&bih=878

 

Sigh. Helen Mirren has a good 30+ years on my and is at least 1,000x's sexier than I am.

[Dandelion]

Early graying runs on my mom's side of the family. I had my first gray hairs when I was in my mid-20's.

 

I've been coloring my hair since I was around 27 (I'm now 41). I've found a product/color that works well for me at home (Natural Instincts) and I color about once a month. If I had to go to the salon each time, I probably wouldn't keep up with it as well - but it only takes me 30 min. from start to finish at home, so I stick with it.

 

I think many women look beautiful with gray hair, but I just don't like the look (yet) for myself... ;)

[sparrow]

I've had a bit of gray since I was 27. Luckily, those first grays came in at the back of my head underneath the rest of my hair. The grays are now migrating to the top of my head:glare:. I can't pass them off as platinum highlights as I have never been blonde.

 

I've been dyeing my hair since I was 15. It has been every shade of red, purple, orange, black, and brown. I'm tired of dyeing my hair.

 

I'm only 32. I still get carded to buy tobacco and alcohol. I'm not sure if I'm ready to go gray, but I just do not look forward to the maintenance required to fight the little snots.

 

I have a friend who has beautiful salt-and-pepper hair. She's under 40 and totally rocks the gray. Maybe I could pull off the gray look too. My grays are almost silver, which I could live with.

 

So, what do you guys do with the gray devils? Give me some ideas.

 

I go for a gossip session every 3-4 months, or so, to fight them at the salon. That's only 3-4 times per year.

 

I didn't start getting serious grey at my temples, or at my part line, until I was in my late thirties. My natural hair color is, as my dad calls it, dirty dishwater blonde. My coloring is pale. The grey coming in was not a good look for me. Over the summer, I put in lots of lighter highlights. I went in tonight and switched it all up for fall--a very rich brown, with red and golden highlights. I love it! So does dh ;).

 

I will say that I've seen many women that look beautiful with grey hair. I have a friend that was mostly grey before 35 and it looks great on her. I will also say that all of these women look at least their age, if not older. That's just part of being grey. If you don't mind that, go for it!

[mamajag]

I black hair with silver grays and I'm 32. They've been coming in since I was a teenager. I'm totally rocking the greys because the silvers don't take dye well. I know this from all the dye experiences when I was younger.

 

I get carded for alcohol still, though. My DH loves the silvers and wants more.:confused:

[bugs]

I go for a gossip session every 3-4 months, or so, to fight them at the salon. That's only 3-4 times per year.

 

I didn't start getting serious grey at my temples, or at my part line, until I was in my late thirties. My natural hair color is, as my dad calls it, dirty dishwater blonde. My coloring is pale. The grey coming in was not a good look for me.

 

You must be my sister! By the time I was 36 (just having my second child), I was very salt and dirt (my natural hair is a dull mousy brown). My skin color is very washed out in the fall/winter/spring. I did not want to look like my kid's grandparent. I go in every 8 weeks and get it colored blonde. It mixes well with my grey roots that I can extend the time between colorings. I haven't decided when I should go ala natural - maybe 70.

 

I will say that I've seen many women that look beautiful with grey hair. I have a friend that was mostly grey before 35 and it looks great on her. I will also say that all of these women look at least their age, if not older. That's just part of being grey. If you don't mind that, go for it!

:iagree:

[Ellie]

Bring it on. :D

I do have lighter hair (it was quite blonde when I was little, darker blonde as an adult, still sort of blonde if I squint, lol). I only have gray in the very front, a two-inch-wide strip of hair that has always been darker (my grandmother had it, my mother had it, and my younger dd has it). I think it looks kind of cool. :)

 

My cousin's wife's hair was almost completely gray by the time she was 45. It looks beautimous.

[Sparkle]

I've been hiding my gray hair for years. I tried going for several months last year without coloring and I looked horrid. Some people can really rock it, but I'm not one of them. I'm already fat, I don't want to look old, too.

[Pawz4me]

I'm 49 and have been getting my hair colored for years now. I didn't have very many gray hairs when I started and still don't, but my hair has lost a lot of it's shine. That's what I couldn't deal with. If the OTC shine treatments had been available back then, I might have tried one of them instead of coloring. But since I only have to have it colored every eight/nine weeks and go to a rather inexpensive rural salon, it would probably be just as expensive and more time-consuming to do the shine treatments at home than to get it colored.

[Rhonda in TX]

My gray makes me look old.... I go to the salon every 6 weeks for a color & cut. I'm not a normally vain person.... except about this... I do not like being asked if I'm the grandmother of my friends younger kids. I'm not asked that now that I get good cuts/coloring.

 

Same here, except I color my own. A pain, but I decided it was absolutely necessary when the lady checking me out at a department store insisted I should sign up for their "over 50" club to get the discount. When I finally said, "I'm not 50", she even said, "Oh, well, you're almost 50, right?" Um, no. I'm 45. 45 is NOT almost 50. :glare:

[Melissa in Australia]

I am going natural. I have a lot of grey evenly spaced. I am going natural for several reasons.

1. DH has MCS and would not be able to tolerate sleeping with me if I had used chemicals in my hair

2. My hair is just about long enough to sit on. I would hat to think how expensive it would be to colour

3. I have always thought grey hairs were a sign of wisdom. I am trying to look wise.

 

on a side note, an old man tried to chat me up the other day. after a few moments I told him that I know him, mentioned MY DH and reminded him that he use to be my neighbour. He said Oh, I look way younger than what I am... Made me wonder how old he things I am. I am a few years on the lower side of 40.

[Lizzie in Ma]

Mine come in stark white. I earned every one and I am keeping them. :D

[The Girls' Mom]

I'm 36 and have a LOT of gray "highlights". My temples have a lot of gray, with more and more gray showing up sprinkled throughout. Both my parents were almost completely gray by 40, so I don't have a fighting chance. I am too lazy to maintain coloring it, and I really dislike the skunk stripe of neglected coloring of gray haired women. So my only choice is to embrace it :)

 

I tell myself that I've earned them ;) I kind of wish I would get a cool Rogue stripe or something.

[Trish]

My gray makes me look old.... I go to the salon every 6 weeks for a color & cut. I'm not a normally vain person.... except about this... I do not like being asked if I'm the grandmother of my friends younger kids. I'm not asked that now that I get good cuts/coloring.

 

Sadly I have to concur. When we visited my husband's relatives that the kids see rarely (extended family aunts and uncles), they decided that one aunt in particular was "the oldest." She was, in fact, the youngest by about 15 years, but she was the only one who had gone gray.

 

I'm not saying that gray is bad, but you have to be prepared to look older when you do it.

[PrincessMommy]

I've tried going natural but I looked so washed out and tired - and I had a baby at the time! Perhaps it will look better once I'm fully grey, but I haven't checked in about 10yrs. I color my hair a lighter brown than my natural color. I don't have too much trouble with the "line of demarcation" which I've seen on some people with dark brown color.

 

I am thinking of trying to see how grey it is now that I'm closer to 50. I thought maybe I'd do some kind of silver highlight/color. I'm fortunate that a friend is a hairdresser so it costs me WAY less to have it colored and cut. Otherwise I'd be coloring it myself.

[Occasionally]

Mine come in stark white. I earned every one and I am keeping them. :D

 

Hear, hear!

[Night Elf]

I'm 44 and the gray is quite noticeable, especially on the temples, which looks good when it's in a pony tail, IMHO. It's a silvery gray and I really like it. I was dying my hair until Jan. 2011 when I gave up. Some of my gray is coarse and pokes up, but I can live with it. My hair texture changed such that I can now go several days between washings, whereas before, I had to wash it every day to keep it looking nice. I consider this a perk of getting old. I do wish the gray would just go ahead and cover my head. The half and half look with dark blonde/light brown hair is not exactly fashionable. I've thought about dying it gray but then I'd have to maintain that and I just don't have the patience to keep it up. That's why I stopped in the first place. Nope, I'm going gray and I don't wear makeup. I'm blah but happy!

Edited October 25, 2012 by Night Elf

[G5052]

I'm at the age where it would be normal to be gray.

 

Mine are very wirey though, and the combination of the wirey gray ones and the smooth brown ones is a mess. Particulary on the sides where the wirey gray sticks out. A friend of mine specifically grew out her hair so that she could manage this, but I like short hair.

 

So I color it, and it behaves. I have an aunt who is still working at 75, and she swears that coloring her hair keeps her feeling young. Most people think she's in her 60's.

Edited October 25, 2012 by GVA

[Heather in Neverland]

As long as hair dye is available, I will never go gray. :D

 

 

.

[Kathryn]

It's weird because they just don't bother me. I feel like I've earned them. I've never colored my hair and (at least at this time) have no plans to start. Dh has quite a bit now too and I actually really like it. :tongue_smilie:

 

ETA: If it matters, I'm 35 and dh is 40.

 

:iagree: though I'm 33 and did dye my hair crazy colors in my teens. I'm proud of my white hairs though, they came with motherhood.

[zimom]

Gray starts very early in my family. At 23 I was having to color my hair regularly to keep ahead of it since my natural color is medium brown. My oldest son began graying at 18 :lol: I finally gave it up two years ago and now at 45 I am about 80%+ gray. The only one that has a problem with it is my 8 year old daughter.

[Parrothead]

I started going grey (Oh, so that is how I normally spell it :D) when I was 25. 20 years later I'm totally grey.

 

The first 10 years I lightened my hair so the greys just blended in. Now there is so grey that I've gone back auburn when I color. I'm not ready for it to be all grey.

 

(I"m also saving up for the lifestyle lift. ;))

[kewb]

I started going noticeable grey a few years ago. I color and cut every 7 weeks. I don't have enough grey to start rocking the salt and pepper look. I just have an ugly clump by my temple and then bizarre other groupings scattered about. I just look bizarre and old without coloring.

[cassiemc]

I have no problem with someone coloring their own hair, but it's not something I would do. I started getting grey after my dd's birth. I was 24. It has never bothered me. I don't care how old someone thinks I am. I don't see why I should care about that. My grey hairs are white/silver and I think they look great! I am 35 now and am getting more grey hairs. I hope to be the grandma with the long silver hair one day!

[kb44]

Got my first grays when I was 14, and have been dying regularly since I was 21. No way would I go gray, as it makes ME look so old. I have seen others who look stunning with gray/silver hair. I have to dye every 2 weeks, now. Sigh

[merry gardens]

 

 

Blue hair dye works wonders on gray.

(Wendylouwho--your avitar with this question made me laugh.)

Edited October 25, 2012 by merry gardens

[Mekanamom]

Sometimes I like my silver and sometimes not so much. When I do color, I use Natural Instincts at home. Mainly because it isn't permanent and washes out over about 4-6 weeks. You can have it both ways!

[Happy]

Even as I turned 50 something, I didn't have many grey hairs. For the last 15 or so years, I've enjoyed highlighting my brown hair with gold. I think it was a fun and young look.

 

Chemo 'released' all my brown and gold hair...now the hair is coming back a charcoal color with some lighter greys mixed in. (and super soft--my oncologist calls it bunny fur.) It's not a bad color at all--and there's no guarantee it will stay this color as my body heals--but I feel like dark color emphasizes all the lines, shadows, and wrinkles on my face. Sigh.

 

I want to embrace the charcoal. I earned that change the hard way--kinda like Rogue from X-Men--:tongue_smilie: But I want to keep a youthful vibe.

 

One thing I noticed in the link of grey-haired beauties someone else posted is that they generally had fit bodies and flattering clothes. I suspect what I save on highlighting my hair a couple of times a year, I will easily invest in sharper blouses and such.

 

It occurs to me that purples, blues, and silvers look really good with my skin and gray hair. The browns and golds I've always worn--less flattering these days. Shifting my wardrobe may improve my chances of rocking the gray.

[butterflymommy]

I started dying my hair to cover gray three years ago when I was 36. I alternate between permanent and demi-permanent. I like the way my hair feels after the dye, it feels very silky and has a nice gleam. There are some great products on the market that are cheap (~$7-$10 range). I've used herbashine, revlon, l'oreal, natural instincts. The one mistake I made was going black then trying to lighten. Apparently this is complicated. When I tried to lighten only my roots lightened. Thankfully the black was demi-permanent so it's starting to look better the more I wash it.