Cammie Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I am sure a lot of us new homeschooling moms would love to get some gems of advice from those of you who have been doing it for a while. Â What do you wish you knew when you started homeschooling that you learned only later on? Â TIA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
asta Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 That there would be days like today, when I would have to tell my teen to leave the house, else I would say something I'd live to regret (due to his behavior). Â Â a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had known how quickly library fines can add up if you're not careful. Â I wish I had known to wipe Target out of their nice binders when I saw them for 66 cents each. Â As a homeschooler in a state that requires portfolios and logs, I kind of wish I had "practiced" making those before this, our first registered year. Â I wish I had known I wouldn't like Sonlight's LA. Â I wish I had known that our local homeschool group wasn't nearly as strange as people kept telling me it was (or that I AM that strange!) Â And I wish dh had known how well things were going to go. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThelmaLou Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had known not to push my first grader to the point of tears. I think I'm responsible for making my oldest as neurotic as he is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jolash Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I'd realized sooner that in the early grades, it's all about exposure, not becoming an expert, on what we're studying. Â I wish I'd realized that it's not very realistic to think everyday would be sunshine and roses. Â I wish I'd realized that ds wouldn't love every subject but that doesn't mean he's not learning it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MariannNOVA Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had known: Â That it was okay NOT to like a curriculum I had selected, AND then to scrap it and go to to something else. :001_huh: Â That it was OKAY to be SUPER-ORGANIZED, and have a schedule and keep to it -- that some are relaxed in their homeschooling, but that doesn't work for me, and I must have lesson plans to keep my sanity. :ohmy: (BTW, I remain in awe of relaxed homeschoolers -- I WANT to be you!) Â That homeschooling is different for every single family! There are as many methods as there are families. The methodology that works is as individual as the family that is using it. My homeschool may not look like yours and yours may not look like mine, but that does not make one homeschool more or less desirable, effective, whatever [choose your word] than another. :thumbup: Â To trust my instincts.:001_smile: Â I could go on, but I have a schedule!:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had known....  ...how hard it really is to do a good job at it "all." ...my idea of how homeschool SHOULD be and how homeschooling REALLY is , are 2 very different things  ...There is a time to push and a time to breathe deep...just like child birth...I wish I had known the correct time to do each.  ....how fast my children were going to grow up and leave home  ...homeschooling was not a silver bullet for perfect well-behaved...Christ following kids....  ...that this too (spelling, math, reading issues which seem so important at the time) shall pass....  ...That ALL programs get boring, or old ...and the next one down the line is not always so AWESOME, it is just new and different. I wish I had really known when to switch and when to stick.  ...to get help when I needed it instead of feeling like I was stranded on an island with no help in sight. I should have had help cleaning, cooking, organizing etc. it is ok to hire someone to help. It is not a sign of weakness.  Just a few thoughts, Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cammie Posted September 30, 2009 Author Share Posted September 30, 2009 Wow, guys, thanks! This stuff is gold!:hurray: Â Keep 'em comming! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 How fast the time flies. Your kids don't need to be doing physics and calculus now but you darn sure better be getting ready to teach them because it will be time before you know it. Ditto with the whole college process. Don't wait until you need to know to figure it out and don't figure you have plenty of time because they are only in the 5th grade. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyinTN Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 To relax..I was so pushy and hard in the beginning. :smash: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom31257 Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I'd know about classical education. I didn't find out about it until I found this board last year. I lurked around, and found lots of other advice (parenting, home mgmt, etc.). I have the book and read it this summer. I had most of my curriculum in place, so there wasn't money to switch much around. I feel so inadequate in trying to make the switch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had... Â - researched teaching/curriculum styles after our first year of homeschooling. - done more field trips and fun activities in early elementary - read more aloud when he was younger (we do plenty now and plan to continue through high school) - approached his reading difficulties in a different manner (instead of freaking out when we discovered he was probably dyslexic) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H.S. Burrow Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had read the front matter in TWTM and found these forums sooner than I did. Â I wish I had been directed to LCC just after reading TWTM instead of 3 years later. Â I wish I had known that it was "ok" to take 2 methodologies and merge them to fit our needs and goals. Â I wish that I had not spent our first year homeschooling trying to teach 2 different Histories and 2 different Sciences. I wish that I had just picked a single History & Science for both my 3rd & 6th grader. Â I wish I had taken more field trips when we first started homeschooling instead of worrying about "grades" and assignments. Â I wish I had found Homeschool Easy Records the summer before we started homeschooling instead of 2 years later. (I need plans!!!) Â I wish I had known about Classical Writing 3 years ago instead of finding out about it last year. Â I wish that I had understood that there will always be something to disrupt our schedule and that we just need to roll with it and not fight against it...that we'll all be that much happier and better focused when the event has resolved itself. Â :) Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MariannNOVA Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had been directed to LCC just after reading TWTM instead of 3 years later. Â I wish I had known that it was "ok" to take 2 methodologies and merge them to fit our needs and goals. Â I wish that I had not spent our first year homeschooling trying to teach 2 different Histories and 2 different Sciences. I wish that I had just picked a single History & Science for both my 3rd & 6th grader. Â I wish I had known about Classical Writing 3 years ago instead of finding out about it last year. Â I wish that I had understood that there will always be something to disrupt our schedule and that we just need to roll with it and not fight against it...that we'll all be that much happier and better focused when the event has resolved itself. Â :) Â Â :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leanna Tomlinson Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had realized how much the "hands-on" activities really cement the learning even though I don't always enjoy doing them or cleaning up the mess. Â I wish I had realized that young children really do learn better by DOING rather than being instructed verbally. Â I wish I had realized how much children need drill and repetition. Â I wish I had started grammar earlier with my older kids. Â I wish I had allowed myself to slow down and concentrate on math facts. Â I wish I had made more time for field trips and fellowship. Â I wish I'd realized how quickly they would be packing up and moving into the dorm. Â ~ Leanna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I knew how hard it was going to be. I had been on a homeschool list for 3 years before I was in a situation to actually pull the kids out. I had heard all the dreamy stories of peaceful quiet homes, reading together, flannel pj's snuggling etc What I never heard was the days that you want to run away from home and send the kids back to ps because you can. not. take. one. minute. more. I thought that by homeschooling suddenly my kids would be different people, suddenly the vast majority of their special needs would be unnoticable. I was wrong. They don't like each other more than they did when in ps. They don't like me more just because I am here. Their behaviour problems did not magically go away. In someways things got worse because I lose my temper more than I ever did when they were in ps/daycare and I was at work only seeing them in the evenings. Â I wish I had known my first 3 years not to buy ever bit of curriculum/educational game etc but instead to figure out the kids learning style, my teaching style, and what we could realistically cover in a day/week/year. It would have saved me tons of $$, tons of space and tons of sanity. THe shopping is fun, the guilt over the unused curric not so much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plimsoll Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 LCC, IEW, Junior Analytical Grammar, Memoria Press, Yesterday's Classics. Â That it's OK to jump to the right level in Saxon and work from there, instead of plodding through at too low a level. Â To feel free to modify and adjust to suit your own needs. Â To never buy read-once books - get them from the library. Â To fill breaktime/lunch with educational videos. Â To start the day with reading, since my son needs time to wake up and become civil. Â To relax and enjoy the time with my son. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I would have bought curriculum right off the bat rather than wasting the first two years trying to do it on my own. Â I wish I would have been more aware of my child's level rather than insisting on sticking with the curriculum and doing every page. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 Now I believe that I can figure everything out, with God's help. At first I was pretty terrified, probably for about the first 2 years. After that, I obsessed and analyzed everything to death. I think it took almost 4 years to really hit my stride and relax. Â The other important thing came with it--I teach my child, not the curricula. Sometimes I skip around. Every so often I take a breather and consolidate what has been learned so far and count that as a lesson. I don't mind going into the summer, so that helps. If a curriculum doesn't work, I do consider changing it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenniferB Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I would not have inserted my advice, curriculum choice, or educational philosophy in the company of other homeschoolers. I've gone from one extreme to the other, and I have such memory pain when I recall all the advice I gave out. I wish I would have listened more. Â I also wish I would have realized that we didn't need to master ancient history the first time through. Maybe I would have moved onto the next period of history easier if I would have accepted that. Â Oh, one more wish, I wish I would have known that I desperately need structure. Â Oh, oh, one more, I wish I would have known that spelling, grammar, and writing are important to start early. A little bit each day can go a long way. Â OK - I'm done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mycalling Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 ...Adapt everything including schedule to our lives, their learning abilities, and my sanity. They will still end up learning more than the PS kids. Â ...Just because it's in a curriculum we're using, doesn't mean we have to do it. There won't be huge gaps in their knowledge. Â ...If I can't find something, make my own. I know what my kids need to learn, when they're ready to learn it, and how best to present it. Â ...Make firm goals to achieve by graduation, and soft goals to only shoot for each year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in WI Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 (edited) One of the biggest lessons I have learned is not to buy curriculum based on anyone's recommendation unless they have actually *used* and *finished* a program! There is a honeymoon stage that homeschoolers go through with new curriculum (myself included!). Do not run out and buy anything immediately after an encounter with a person in this stage. LOL! Â Don't take curriculum advice from someone who only has a four year old. (This ties nicely into the above lesson.) Â Find out someone's homeschooling philosophy before following their curriculum advice blindly. Make sure that you share the same philosophy. Â I have learned that it is ok to switch curricula if it is not working for you. Now, there is a difference between feeling 'eh' about a curriculum (which wouldn't make me drop it) and absolutely hating it. When I absolutely hate it, it is ok to put it up for sale and try something else! Â I have learned not to take it personally when someone sniffs there nose and exclaims derisively, "Well, *we* don't try to do school-at-home". Is that now the biggest put-down in homeschooling or what? ;) Â Finally, I have learned that homeschooling is hard work. When I start losing my mind from being with the children 24/7, I need to call up another homeschooling mom and escape to the Cheesecake Factory for a slice of cheesecake and a martini! Edited September 30, 2009 by Heather in WI Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 That homeschooling is a marathon not a sprint. I would have slowed down and not been so pushy. I also would have started a formal writing program in first grade with my oldest. We're having to catch up now in fourth. Also, I would have taught my oldest phonics. He was a spontaneous reader at 2 and so I never thought he needed formal lessons. It has negatively affected his ability to sound out words (though he rarely finds words he doesn't know) and spelling is a nightmare. My younger one is definitely benefiting from my experience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrianne in TX Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 That you will spend all your time looking, researching, scanning craigslist/WTM Sale/Cathswap/vegsource for the "perfect" addition that will "be the be all end all" for my kids. Â That I will now always be tired. But........ Â 20 minutes on the couch just shutting my eyes is like 15 cups of coffee some days or 1/2 bottle of wine on others. Â My house will never be as clean as I thought it could be and thats okay. Â There are days that a 45 min walk or a shower for the day is an either/or ---often times I am just stinky all day!!!! Â That even though there are many of "where is that d*&^* school bus anyways" days that my kids are so far better educated and like learning (not school mind you but learning). Â Oh and my favorite is that I can just get a silly grin when my kids break out in latin in the strangest places and adults look at them like they are from Mars and they just grin back and say ..oh thats latin :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tricia Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 How to relax and realize I did not have to duplicate the public school setting and that a 5 year old DOES NOT HAVE to learn to read if he isn't ready. That more cuddling with my children and read alouds would have happened more often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kfamily Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 That so much of the primary years (k-2) should be spent on reading, writing, math and maybe a foreign language along with a ton of books for science, history and literature. I would add nature walks, fun kits and experiements, field trips, drawing, etc and call those early years complete. My older dd really doesn't remember much of what she learned in those early years and as a newer homeschooler I didn't need to put so much pressure on us. Â That no matter how hard I try to find it there is usually not a perfect curriculum or individual subject program for us. You really do have to learn to adapt anything and everything. Â I agree with a pp that I wish I realized how quickly your students grow up and need you, as the teacher, to have a level of education of your own that will benefit both of you. I feel better as a teacher when I have my confidence in hand because I know what I'm teaching and how I want to teach it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BikeBookBread Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 This is a GOLDEN thread!! Thank you so much! :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Â I'm only two months in and am thinking I should print this thread and have it laminated when it's done... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim in Appalachia Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I knew it was ok to use textbooks; I wish I knew that it was ok to stick to a more traditional curriculum and not try to do a "super" curriculum; I wish I knew that my children, especially my oldest, would do better with lots of structure. Â I will say that having 5 kids spread apart (11 years between the oldest and youngest), I have done things a lot differently for my younger boys. I pleased with how we do school now, and no longer feel the pressure to make "super students". Â I was always more of a goal type person, but I realize that I needed specific long term goals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I knew how hard it was going to be. I had been on a homeschool list for 3 years before I was in a situation to actually pull the kids out. I had heard all the dreamy stories of peaceful quiet homes, reading together, flannel pj's snuggling etc What I never heard was the days that you want to run away from home and send the kids back to ps because you can. not. take. one. minute. more. I thought that by homeschooling suddenly my kids would be different people, Â :iagree:And that around year 5 burnout would be huge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynn Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 That there are "exclusive" hsing groups and that I would be judged by the cover school I choose because it was not exlusively Christian. Isn't that sad. I got another unsolicited lecture of why I should not go with the cover school I chose. "Excuse me but your cover school will not even consider my family to be part of it's group because I do not attend a specific church regularly and do not have a pastor to fill our the pastor recommedation form" (of course, I keep that to myself when I get into one of those coversations) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MistyJ Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I knew fresh air and sunshine don't waste time, but make time more effective. Â I wish I knew that if I'm screaming and the child is crying, it's time to do something differently. Â I wish I knew that if I don't schedule the subject, the subject won't get done, no matter how wonderful the materials. Â I am grateful to know that God has blessed my efforts with a steady increase in patience. (I was the most impatient/edgy, unlikely homeschool candidate.) People told me He would. Thank you, Father! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had known how much review children need to really remember the concepts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ginevra Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had understood that as they get older, it will take more time and more money. I had heard so many stories of how it takes the proverbial "2 hours". Well, that was true when they were 6 and 7, maybe 8, but not anymore. I am not sorry that I need to invest more time and money than I had imagined, but I wish I had had a more realistic picture of how it would be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I'd realized in the early years that my oldest and I were completely separately people. Of course that makes sense in the abstract, but I am a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants type who needs to feel inspired to work hard. I like to choose my own way, minute by minute, day by day. That is how I work best. My oldest daughter feels lost without outside structure. So often I would give her 3 or 4 choices because I would have *loved* that as a child. She would wind up in tears saying, "Just tell me what I have to DO Mom!" I used to try to encourage her to go out and play, to find other kids to play with, to join gymnastics, or do other things I would have enjoyed at her age. Except that thrived with much alone time. Â At least we both adore reading and loathe hands-on projects. Â Read up on the Myers-Briggs types if you haven't already. Different children are motivated in different ways. What seems like tedium for one may be comforting for another. Freedom for one is frightening for someone else. Match the approach to the child rather than the other way around. Â Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smrtmama Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 This is my first year homeschooling, and I've already wish I had known: Â 1. You don't have to teach them everything in the first pass. I'll hit each period of history at least one more time. They don't have to learn it all by the logic stage! Â 2. You probably won't like every single curriculum you pick out. You might downright hate some that come highly recommended. Ditch it and get a new one that fits your needs better and don't feel bad about it! Â 3. You'll vacillate between feeling like you're not doing enough and feeling like you're doing waaaay too much. This is probably a good sign that you're doing the right amount overall. ;) Â 4. It's impossible to be too organized or have too many supplies! You'll need supplies you didn't realize you needed -- binder rings, hole protectors for notebook paper, endless erasers because your child will wear those down much fast than he wears down the pencils, etc. Â 5. Have a homeschool buddy to keep you honest, on track, and feeling good about what you're doing. I'd never make it through without Patchfire, who gave me first-hand advice about her experiences with curricula, supports me when I feel like I'm failing, and gives me honest constructive criticism if I'm screwing something up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I wish I had known that its not a waste of time to do all those field trips, and that school work will wait, and that it would have been better to get out of the house more while they were younger. Â I wish I had known it just doesn't work to rush and cram knowledge into my kids, that they can only learn at their own pace and not a speeded up one, and that "pushing" them creates more gaps than going at a steady, relaxed pace. Â On the other hand....I am so glad we have spent hours on the couch with read alouds, and that we have spent so much time on history. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phathui5 Posted October 1, 2009 Share Posted October 1, 2009 I wish I had known how quickly library fines can add up if you're not careful.  Or that I'd gotten my teacher's card sooner, so I could avoid the fines. (In MD, homeschoolers can get a Teacher's Card that makes it so there aren't late fines) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kmacnchs Posted October 1, 2009 Share Posted October 1, 2009 i wish i'd realized that it isn't really a good idea to buy books ahead just because they are a good deal. I often ended up changing my mind. Â no kidding!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frontier Mom Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 (edited) Great thread!! Â I wish I would have known... to be more diligent about creating a "context" for learning. Â to create a designated learning room from the start. I love the fact that it is impossible to come into our learning room without learning something. Â to laugh more, play games more and go outside more in the middle of the day. Â to make videos of our recitations and activities so I could look back upon them now. Â to relax and realize my kids are going to be less than perfect, make mistakes and embarass me sometimes but I am still going to love them to pieces afterwards. Â to take them out in the rain to laugh and dance. Â to read aloud on a blanket at the park more often. Â to warn my dh that we would be spending money on curriculum that just doesn't work but it would still be cheaper than a private school. Â to realize that I am less than perfect and I would have relied on the Lord much more in my day to day schooling. Â to play hookie, eat chocolate and watch movies every now and again, just because we can!! Edited October 2, 2009 by Frontier Mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 (edited) I wish I had known I needed a psychology degree. (or wait, is the the motherhood I'm thinking of?) Â I wish I'd known that my yelling and getting frustrated is not in fact a kick in the pants to do better. Â I do now, though. Edited October 2, 2009 by LauraGB dropped my g on thinking Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 That it is like driving on the New Jersey Turnpike: you zip along and suddenly meet up with an unexpected wave of brake lights. You come to a halt, and then poof, the jam is gone in a few seconds and you're back up to 60. Sometimes, however, you go 120. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 That it is ok (and good for people like me) to have "dot your i's and cross your t's" days where you get all caught up on all the little assignments that somehow fell through the cracks, including the grading. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeanne in MN Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 That come February, I will likely be burnt out and I don't need to panic that we shouldn't be homeschooling. The February blahs are normal, we can take time to go to the movies in the middle of the day or do something fun to break up the monotony. Â That when I start thinking maybe the kids should be in school, it's often because I'm stressed with other things and get overwhelmed. It's not the hsing that needs to go, I need to ride it through and it will get better. Â That better lesson plans help me be more productive by following through on lessons. We get much more accomplished. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonibee Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 I wish I had researched high school plans backwards -- even though she said she would never go to college -- I wish we had prepared anyway so that she wasn't trying to cram college prep into her senior year. Â I wish I had not allowed my son to waste so much daily time on public high school sports! Â I have learned (after 16 years or so now) to keep on going with the daily drip, drip, drip. It all adds up. Routine is everything. Structure is everything. Taking breaks and field trips are great, but when we are home, it is daily routine. Â Work first, play second. Â Daily schedules, so the kids can work ahead. Â Continuing with drip, drip, drip of subjects that are difficult can make them easier. Giving up has never turned out to be the best answer. Â Practice makes better. Â Smiles go a long way. Patience MUST be prayed for. Kindness and a soft voice is what a child's heart longs for. Â I have learned to encourage. You can do this! I am the biggest cheerleader my kids have. Bragging on my kids in front of other people. Â And lastly, again, smiles and an arm around the shoulder go a long way. Â Joan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BMC Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 (edited) my kids would hate me for it (It remains to be seen if it is a permanent condition.) Â That you can't teach someone not willing to learn. Edited October 2, 2009 by BMC typo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 That it is like driving on the New Jersey Turnpike: you zip along and suddenly meet up with an unexpected wave of brake lights. You come to a halt, and then poof, the jam is gone in a few seconds and you're back up to 60. Sometimes, however, you go 120. Â Ah, thank you for talking to me in words I can understand! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 I wish I had researched high school plans backwards -- even though she said she would never go to college -- I wish we had prepared anyway so that she wasn't trying to cram college prep into her senior year. I wish I had not allowed my son to waste so much daily time on public high school sports!  I have learned (after 16 years or so now) to keep on going with the daily drip, drip, drip. It all adds up. Routine is everything. Structure is everything. Taking breaks and field trips are great, but when we are home, it is daily routine.  Work first, play second.  Daily schedules, so the kids can work ahead.  Continuing with drip, drip, drip of subjects that are difficult can make them easier. Giving up has never turned out to be the best answer.  Practice makes better.  Smiles go a long way. Patience MUST be prayed for. Kindness and a soft voice is what a child's heart longs for.  I have learned to encourage. You can do this! I am the biggest cheerleader my kids have. Bragging on my kids in front of other people.  And lastly, again, smiles and an arm around the shoulder go a long way.  Joan lovely thank you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NavyWifeandMommy Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 You don't have to follow the local school's schedule or their outline of what is learned (still struggle on this one after three years)  It's okay to spent a month just doing story problems if that is where you child needs the extra work.  You can do it!  You can use the unpopular materials not what everyone else is using (learned that after first year)  Every family is different  You don't have to be out and about every single day 'socialize'.  Trust your first gut instints, and stick to it. Try not to give in to the greener on the other side. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanvan Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 ...that, with the best intentions of 'serving' others, you can become sucked into outside activities and groups that don't meet YOUR family's needs and instead drain your energy -- making it impossible to be effective at home.  ...That there are people and groups in the homeschooling community who don't understand boundaries and will take and take and take. There are also wonderful friendships to be made, but you need to know how to tell the difference, and it is not always easy.  ...not to spend years trying to help organize a group that did not want organization and desired only to socialize and fly by the seat of the pants. I should have put that energy into my own family's needs.  ...not to expect that because a family is homeschooling they (or their children) will have a genuine love of learning.  ...to review, review, review!  ...slow and steady wins the race, poor learning is the result of haste.  ...More writing = better writing.  ...Repeated reading of the same story = more fluent reading (it is not cheating)  ...drilling math facts is a very necessary evil. Furthermore, no math curriculum will drill exactly the facts your child has trouble with.  ... not to focus so much on details of history in the early years  ... that playing in the yard with mud and water, looking (with attention) at birds, insects, etc. teaches early science better than a textbook. It is okay to leave them outside without feeling guilty.  ...as another poster mentioned...5 year burnout is very real.  ...that every activity available is not necessarily beneficial. We should have cut our activities down to those that truly interest us much sooner. We spent too much time participating in things we didn't care about just to be social.  ...that we need to be home in order to home school.  ...Dr and Dentist appointments need to be during my after school hours.  ...it is not necessary to cram all 12 years of schooling into the first 5 years!  ... most field trips organized by large groups are also available to individual families.  ...Field trips taken with just our family, or one other family yield greater learning than those taken with 25 other kids and all their parents - - and they are more enjoyable.  ...that there would be days when I don't really like my kids (and they don't much like me). That we would get through those days and that we will not be ruined forever by them.  ...there would be days when I see the very real achievements my children have made and know that it is because of the time and energy I put into homeschooling.  ...to refuse to play the comparision game with other homeschool mothers.  I'm sure I could think of more, but these are the things that were the hardest for me to learn personally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolybear Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 That off days here or there (or even weeks) do not mean that my kids will be hopelessly behind. Â That I will need to keep reassessing our hs. Kids change, grow, and need different things at different times. And that my adapting to this is okay and not a sign of my not knowing what we are supposed to be doing (as others might think :). Â That no matter how great I think what we are doing is there are those who will never see it that way. Â That homeschooling is our life, not our educational plans. Â That this is REALLY hard work. Â That is incredibly gratifying, frustrating, challenging, exciting, boring, etc. all rolled into one. Â That I could have so many days that leave me flying high. Â That I could have so many days that could leave me pulling my hair out. Â That I would need to change and grow and open my mind more in order to better serve our homeschool and my children's needs. Â That I would love this so much! Â Â Woolybear Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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