Do you think this is weird or am I making too much of it?

[Samiam]

I hired a 11 year old neighborhood girl to dog-sit our Lab. I had just met her a few weeks prior as she walked around our neighborhood delivering flyers advertising her pet-sitting business (with her mom). Seemed very nice and responsible.

 

Talked to the mother on the phone, to ensure the girl would be available. Mother said she would be with the daughter too when the girl comes over (and so would the 9 year old brother). Okay, fine, no problem with them coming along, and actually good that Mom is coming to ensure daughter is doing it right. Seemed like a very nice family.

 

Girl and mother come over the morning we are leaving, so I can show them everything. It's pretty simple. Come over 4 times a day, let dog out, feed her, make sure she has water. Walk her if you want too, but not necessary. Explicit instructions: Don't worry about the cat. NO NEED to change the litter, it will be fine the 3 1/2 days we are gone. Cat has plenty of food. Cat drinks dog's water. Really no need to worry about cat, or even go upstairs. (Really, I didn't want them to go upstairs, cat room/laundry room is a bit of a mess, floor needs swept, etc). All doors upstairs are shut, so neither cat nor dog can go into bedrooms.

 

So we get home, a bit earlier than expected today. Pull up to see two adults and 6 kids sitting on our back patio area, back door wide open (hello, my AC is running!!). Walk in the front door, see TV is on. The crowd comes in from the back patio area and meets us in the front door area.

It's:

-Hired dog-sitter girl, her mom, and the brother....AND

-Mom's sister visiting from AZ, and her three children.

 

-Two of the children walk in wearing/carrying my children's toys. Mom says hopes we don't mind that the children played with our toys. We ,of course, say no problem. Keep in mind, ALL toys were in the toy room (because my downstairs was cleaned up before we left) and the toy room door was shut before we left (again, didn't want dog or cat in there).

 

-Mom says dog opened a bedroom door by bumping into it (it's completely plausible, she's done it before if door isn't pulled tightly). Cat ran into the room (this seems less likely as cat normally never goes into this son's room, but who's to say for sure). So they went in to get the cat. They noticed this poster from such-n-such town, asks questions if we've been there, turns out they used to live there. (this poster was on a side wall of the room, so to see you would have had to go into the room, walk around, etc).

 

-Mom asks about a flyer I have hanging up on a wall in my office area, "did my son go to that camp because her son did, maybe they were there at the same time!"......weird thing is, this flyer is smallish, and hanging from a corkboard on a wall, that you would have really had to walk up right next to to be able to see.

 

-Mom has a bag of cat poo....they've been cleaning that which means they've been upstairs in the messiest room of the house that I EXPLICITLY asked them not to bother with. Course I already knew they were upstairs due to having seen the poster in my son's room and commenting on that. Of course, as I know my dog, she was following them around and thus likely only opened the bedroom door as she followed THEM upstairs to begin with.

 

-They've opened a new roll of paper towels....which means they have to search all over the kitchen for them...I don't keep them stored in an obvious place because we buy them in bulk from Costco. I had left a roll of paper towels out for "just in case", but they didn't mention any issues, so not sure what they used them for (other than maybe cat poo??)

 

After they leave, my boys go into the toy room and see that toys have been COMPLETELY rearranged, moved, disheveled, etc. So it's not like they just opened the door and picked up the first thing they saw...they stayed and played for a while, and took apart some Playmobile sets :(.

 

We had at least 10 flies that I've killed in the last few hours....likely from that back door being left open.

 

Sooo.....we are feeling kinda violated. I dunno, maybe this is how a dog sitter is supposed to be, "make themselves" at home. I wasn't expecting it. I was expecting come in, let dog out, talk to her, rub her back, feed/water her, and get out. I really can't get over that, REALLY, you let your children come in and play with the toys...I mean, really PLAY with them. You couldn't have left your house guests at home for 20 minutes while you walked down the street? Maybe your visiting sister could have stayed at home with all of the children, while just girl and Mom come and take care of business?

 

What do you think? Weird or to be expected?

[mom2samlibby]

I would be livid! I would have expected it to be an in out type thing too. Sounds like they made themselves at home.

[Dory]

If I ever did that to a client I would expect to be fired and my reputation ruined. If I had done that as a teenager I would've expected the same thing. If you are given explicit instructions, you follow them to the letter. That's your job, that's what you're paid to do. If you are handling other peoples property you make sure it is in the same condition when you leave, as it was when you got there. It's not yours, you don't get to treat it like it's yours. I would let the girl know that I was unhappy, perhaps the kid doesn't know that this isn't ok. She's trying to make a little extra cash and her mom is going to ruin it for her. Most of the changes I've made over the years I have made because of customer feedback. Feedback is good, it lets the kid know what they did right, and what they didn't do right so that they can learn and grow from the experience.

Edited July 7, 2012 by Dory

[marbel]

I don't think that is to be expected. Not at all!

 

I would feel just as you do - violated. I probably would have reacted just the way you did, but I would be fuming.

 

Of course I'd never ask them to pet-sit again, and I'd probably tell friends in the neighborhood who might hire them not to.

 

They absolutely crossed a line.

[snickelfritz]

Weird, weird, weird, weird, weird, weird, weird.

 

We pet sat for a friend and we went in (dd's and I), took care of pet, left. We didn't play with toys, search anything, or go anywhere besides straight to the pet area.

 

Would you feel comfortable saying something to them? I'd certainly never hire them again.

[Carrie75]

So weird! I would feel violated as well. I wouldn't say anything to her, the damage is done, but obviously never hire her again. The mom is setting a horrible example for her daughter regarding respecting other's privacy. geez.

[Murphy101]

I have been bloody furious and 2 seconds from calling the police. That's freaking nuts way over the line. I would not have been polite and sure as heck would not have paid them. I'd be really really angry.

[Slartibartfast]

That is very weird. I would be furious.

[Mama Geek]

When I was a kid our next door neighbor had cats and a couple of turtles. I would get to go over and take care of them when they were out of town. I went by myself, probably that age or a little older, they asked me to stay for a while a couple of the times I was there just so the cat would get some socialization in. They had some drinks and snacks in the fridge that the offered. I cleaned up any messes, I watched a little TV while playing with the cats, I did have a drink or snack sometimes but not every time and wouldn't have done so had it been offered. I left the house looking as good as when I walked in or better and the pets were well taken care of. I didn't go snooping through their house.

 

What they did was unacceptable, IMO.

[mom2hunangirls]

That is WEIRD!! I house/dog sat for 8 days last week, I've known the family for years....and even on the nights my kids stayed with me (they are best friends with this family's kids), they didn't play with the toys there! We brought our own toys. Do you know any other neighbors that have used them???

[Lisbeth]

Wow. Classy. I would be quite ticked.

[Patches]

Very very weird and kind of creepy! I would feel the same way you do.

[bettyandbob]

Ugh!

 

my dd has been a pet sitter for years. She started with ne neighbor at 9 and I went with her then. She's 14 now and I don't always go with her.

 

Dd goes in the house takes care of the animals and leaves. If she needs something she can't find, she'll come home and get something of ours to use--paper towels, broom etc. she does not hunt around anyone's house.

 

If I were to hire a pet sitter it would never occur to me to tell them not to run through my house. I guess you need to tell some people the obvious.

[catz]

For a kid that was advertising this service!? That's nuts! I'd never hire them again and you might want to spread the word to your other neighbors that might be interested in her service. Creepy.

 

I have an 11 year that was supposed to go feed a neighbors dogs last night and forgot! :glare: Partially my fault of course for not reminding him. He is officially out of business and I told the neighbor he owes them some free dog walking if they want to take him up on it.

[elegantlion]

So weird! I would feel violated as well. I wouldn't say anything to her, the damage is done, but obviously never hire her again. The mom is setting a horrible example for her daughter regarding respecting other's privacy. geez.

 

:iagree: I've used pet sitters extensively in the past. That is way over the line. You didn't invite them over to play, you paid for a service.

 

Honestly, I'd probably be so livid I'd stew and never speak to them again.

 

However, dependent upon how "witchy" I wanted to be, I'd ask to speak to the mother and dd at your home and explain how violated it felt. I'd outline a few tips on how to provide a service from a customer's perspective and not comment about using them again. Let them figure that part out.

 

Thing is the girl may think this is normal behavior and be hurt down the road when she isn't getting more clients. If no one ever tells her... well, that's hard, because obviously the mother doesn't get it.

 

To get it all out, I'd probably write a letter and let it sit on the desk for a few days. I'd address one to the mother and one to the dd. Having done some pet sitting and owned a cleaning business, respect for a client's privacy is very important.

[Bee Happy]

Wow! That is extra strange. And she didn't feel bad at all?

 

I would not have turned on air, tv, or touched anything. Go in, take care of dog...get out. I wouldn't have even sat down while the dog was outside. And then to let a strange person that you didn't even meet inside??? What was she thinking??

[Katy]

Bringing relatives over? Running the air while leaving the door open? Invading every area of your house? I would assume they were casing the place or stealing something.

 

I did some petsitting as a kid. I would sometimes sit and watch tv with a pet on my lap, just so they had someone spending a little time with them. But it was maybe for 20-30 minutes top. No one came over. Nothing was invaded. And I certainly never snooped or moved around their belongings. How horrible. I might have snapped at them.

[Bee Happy]

Bringing relatives over? Running the air while leaving the door open? Invading every area of your house? I would assume they were casing the place or stealing something.

 

I did some petsitting as a kid. I would sometimes sit and watch tv with a pet on my lap, just so they had someone spending a little time with them. But it was maybe for 20-30 minutes top. No one came over. Nothing was invaded. And I certainly never snooped or moved around their belongings. How horrible. I might have snapped at them.

 

Now that sounds totally understandable!

[Carrie75]

Just curious... did you come home hours earlier then she thought or something? I wonder if she was expecting you later? It's so weird she would be so open with her lack of respect!

[Samiam]

Thanks for the feedback. I'm glad to hear that I am not just being uptight (I can be that way somtimes:D). I just can't stop thinking about it though....violated is definately the word to describe it. Even my children were aghast at the toy room situation, and they don't have a problem with sharing, but it's just how the room was left that shocks them.

 

I won't be using her again. I don't know that I have the "kudzu" to say anything to them though....my DH thinks better to just move on and learn our lesson (be sure to budget in dog boarding for future out-of-town trips, lol!)

[clarkacademy]

I could never do something like that! I do not have any idea what made them think this was OK! I don't even like going to a friends house without them there too creepy! I am so sorry you were treated that way. That is horrible:grouphug:

[PinkInTheBlue]

Weird, creepy, and amazingly rude!! I'm not one to overreact at all but, I have to say, I would contemplate changing my locks. Someone weird enough to think that's ok would weird me out that they might have made a copy. I'm in awe that someone could fathom that would be okay with you. Wow

[Murphy101]

Bringing relatives over? Running the air while leaving the door open? Invading every area of your house? I would assume they were casing the place or stealing something.

 

That was my thoughts as well. Either they are just the most inconsiderate idiots ever or they were casing the place.

[jujsky]

I don't think that is to be expected. Not at all!

 

I would feel just as you do - violated. I probably would have reacted just the way you did, but I would be fuming.

 

Of course I'd never ask them to pet-sit again, and I'd probably tell friends in the neighborhood who might hire them not to.

 

They absolutely crossed a line.

 

:iagree: I'm sorry that happened to you and your family. Violated is exactly how I'd feel.

[Jennifer3141]

:iagree: I'm sorry that happened to you and your family. Violated is exactly how I'd feel.

 

 

:iagree::iagree:

 

That is awful!! We had a similar situation with a pet sitter once who came weeks AFTER we had hired her because she swore we hired her for another session. (Uh, I usually remember when I'm heading out of town!). We came home to find her in our condo and I had left the place a DISASTER because I was in the middle of canning tomatoes. We had to change the locks on our doors. :glare:

[Impish]

Better woman than I am, b/c I would have completely lost it, then and there.

 

Her kids using the toys, INVITING ppl over to your house?! Oh, soooo no ok. In the slightest.

 

I would have been foaming at the mouth and ripped into them w/out stopping to think. My home is not a freakin community centre!

[jelbe5]

I would be furious! When we sit for friends we take care of the dog and bunny (lots of love, petting, walking dog, etc.), put mail in kitchen and only use bathroom if necessary. We do not go in rooms, touch toys, tv, etc. These people took advantage of you. I would not use them again or reccomend the daughter's services.

[Ruby Rose]

I could see a sitter coming in and hanging with the dog in the yard or taking for a walk for a couple of hours just to keep it company, but the rest is just over the top strange. I personally would feel strange hanging in someone's house and would be worried I would mess something up.

[QueenCat]

I would be livid. And the mother needs to be told this is inappropriate. My son does a lot of pet sitting. He does bring his brother at times, but all clients know this is a possibility as it is on the release they have to sign.

[MrsBasil]

Weird, creepy, and amazingly rude!! I'm not one to overreact at all but, I have to say, I would contemplate changing my locks. Someone weird enough to think that's ok would weird me out that they might have made a copy. I'm in awe that someone could fathom that would be okay with you. Wow

 

:iagree: Well, except with the overreacting thing. I still do that. ;)

 

I would also be scrutinizing my bank accounts and credit reports, combing every room in the house to see if anything is missing, and feeling very much like I felt when I was robbed. I'd probably let neighbors I was friendly know about the quality of service I got.

 

I've pet sat for people and was specifically invited to stay at their home and I still didn't go into any room that wasn't a public space and left it cleaner than I found it. When I was a kid we had friends who pet sat and they often spent hours at our house because our dog loved company and we had cable. They never went into our rooms or anything like that. Stuck to the kitchen, family room, and bathroom.

 

In this case, it doesn't like that type of invitation was extended. When I've pet sat in those cases, I go in take care of the animal's needs, check for any pet messes or signs of anything amiss, play with them, walk them, and get out. I don't go into rooms that have been closed off, don't read fliers, don't let other people come in with me(well, my DH a few times when it's been late or we're on our way somewhere. He didn't touch a thing and I gave the owner's a heads up he might accompany me at night), and don't touch personal items.

 

This is so weird. My paranoia would be working overtime!

[mom2denj]

U.N.A.C.C.E.P.T.A.B.L.E!!! I would have been FURIOUS!!!!

[Wendi]

I agree with everyone else. It's unprofessional and inconsiderate. Hiring someone to come into one's home for pet care means you are trusting them to be professional, responsible, and considerate while in your home. They blew it. I don't blame the dd; she's pretty young, and probably trusted her mom.

 

I do think you should give the girl some feedback. Maybe a note saying you're thankful the pets were cared for, but that you recommend she not allow others to accompany her into customers' houses and use their belongings, because it bothered you and will quite possibly bother others as well. And you want her to be successful! :001_smile: Honestly, 11 years old is old enough to follow some simple pet care instructions without mom, if she expects to be paid for it. I pet-sat for our neighbors all the time at that age, and my mom never came with me. The owners usually left me a note reminding me what to do and where to find whatever I needed (or they just left the pet food, etc., out with the note).

 

Wendi

[QueenCat]

Weird, creepy, and amazingly rude!! I'm not one to overreact at all but, I have to say, I would contemplate changing my locks. Someone weird enough to think that's ok would weird me out that they might have made a copy. I'm in awe that someone could fathom that would be okay with you. Wow

 

:iagree:I hadn't thought of that but yes, you need to change your locks.

[Remudamom]

You should have said something then and there. I'd remedy that ASAP. Let them know you are astonished that they would think their behavior was acceptable and inform them that you won't be using their services again. And change your lock.

[PeacefulChaos]

WHAT?!

WEIRD!!! :svengo:

[Denisemomof4]

It is wrong on ALL levels. I wonder if sister and kids stayed at your house?

 

My neighbor was hired to let out our dogs and care for our farm. Not only did she abuse my horses and dogs to the point that the horses wouldn't approach me for over two weeks AND one of my dogs ran away and hid from her, a party was obviously held here. They didn't clean up well. :glare: not only that, I am 5'9.5 and dh is 6'2. My Suburban had OBVIOUSLY been driven by SHORT people, and they didn't even bother to move the set back. My keys were hidden and it definitely took effort to find them. :angry:

 

Did I mention that her dog jumped all over my meticously kept car and horribly scratxhed it? Or that she was nice enough toplow us out after a snow storn but before we got to it? She was SMASHED and took out all our electric fencing. She also somehow left behind some empty beer cans.

 

I am nothing more than cordial now.

 

:leaving:

 

I hate people in the house whe. We arwnt here.

[besroma]

Wow. That is horrible. I would definitely talk to her about it. That is totally unacceptable.

 

I would also warn friends in your neighborhood who might consider hiring her.

[kitten18]

What do you think? Weird or to be expected?

:blink::eek::svengo:

I am speechless.

[justasque]

Way, way unacceptable. However, if it wasn't obvious to this family that it was unacceptable, and clearly it wasn't as they don't seem to have been embarrassed when you found them, then I don't think explaining it to them is going to really help much. Clearly the mom is utterly clueless. Explaining it to the daughter might help, but as the mom would be the adult in charge, I don't think it would prevent the issue from happening again in the future. I'd chalk it up to experience, and move on. Next time, get references before hiring anyone to do anything in or to your home.

[Kathryn]

I'd be furious.

[jasar31629]

That's slapstick-comedy-movie weird. Wow. I don't know what I would have done coming home to that. Nuts.

[Seasider]

Wow, that is surreal.

 

I suppose there's probably just a true lack of social grace and professional business savvy going on, but.... you can count me among those who would be taking inventory of personal items and thinking about calling the locksmith.

[mumto2]

Change your locks and watch your bank accounts/credit cards. Also take look at any interesting collections you and dc's might have -- playmobile charactors, coins, fossils etc. These people knew no boundaries in your home and obviously were everywhere for hours. I am paranoid, I know, but this was weird. I can't imagine behaving like that at home in anyone elses home. Not even our best friends home where yes we do know where most things are -- I would have brought paper towels from my home rather then search!

 

I probably would never say a thing to them. I would try to never say much to them again-- too bad they live near by. Because they seem to be nuts and appear to be clueless about appropriate actions. I wouldn't want to be on their bad side.

 

Just say friends are taking care of dog at their house if ever asked why not hiring again. You have no responsibility to parent their daughter -- the fact she is not hired again is plenty.

:grouphug:

[Hoot]

I would be absolutely FURIOUS if someone did that to me. It's one thing if it's a friend who's coming over and makes themselves at home for a bit, but quite another when it's some random neighbor that you hardly know. Completely unacceptable behavior. There is no way on the planet I would EVER hire them again and I would let others know as well.

 

Wow... I'm just stunned.

[mommaduck]

Oh goodness! DH and I dogsat when we were newlyweds. We were asked to go ahead actually stay in the home while the owners were gone. But even then, we didn't go into ANY bedroom other than the one we were assigned (just happened to be the master bedroom...I have no idea what the kids' rooms looked like or the den) and we didn't touch anything other than what was necessary (fridge, stove, microwave) and the TV.

 

You just don't go intruding on people's privacy.

[PrairieSong]

So bizarre!! I'd be furious and I'd have a chat with them. Poor girl won't learn anything from this experience if she sees it as normal. If you can't do it alone go with your husband. Maybe have him do the talking if you can't bring yourself to do it.

 

I pet sat for our next door neighbors a few times and I think the only thing I did besides play with the animals and feed them, etc., was look at a book that was on their coffee table. No one told me not to go through the house and rummage through their things. That was just a given in my mind. I think I was about 13.

[WishboneDawn]

:iagree:I hadn't thought of that but yes, you need to change your locks.

 

:iagree:

[Trish]

Very, VERY weird! I would not be having these people pet sit again. It would make me too nervous.

[Trish]

I have been bloody furious and 2 seconds from calling the police. That's freaking nuts way over the line. I would not have been polite and sure as heck would not have paid them. I'd be really really angry.

 

I do think you have to pay them since they did the job, albeit, very inappropriately.

[Soror]

Very crazy.