s/o of house being a pit -- what do YOU not do?

[happypamama]

So which of these things are true in your house?  I'm just curious to see what we moms tend to give up the most when we run out of hours to do it all.

[MeghanL]

I'm not sure this poll will really tell you anything since everyone has a different situation. I outsource deep cleaning and pay someone to clean for me every other week. I keep up with the daily stuff, but I don't have to change sheets, clean bathrooms, vacuum, mop, etc. It also gives me more time to organize since when I have time to work in a room I can concentrate on making it better instead of just getting it to a point of functionality. 

My husband loves to cook. I hate it. So, he makes dinner when he gets home. He usually works from 6 am- 2 pm and is able to come home between 2:30 & 3. 

All of my curriculum is pretty materials and teacher intensive. I have a kinesthetic learning style, so it works best for me. My kids are also pretty spread out with no area for overlap. Multiple projects and experiments every week, buying and gathering needed supplies, ordering books from libraries and cleaning up after the projects are done takes up 87% of my time. However, we all really enjoy learning this way so I'm happy that we are in a position to outsource what we hate doing (ie cleaning) in order to do what we love.

[airforcefamily]

None of those are true for me.

 

I have lots of kids, including little ones, make meals from scratch, do deep cleaning, have no family nearby or outsourced help, use intensive materials, and my husband works long hours and is away frequently.

 

I'm tired and each day is long and difficult. I have learned to be more efficient and make better use of time.

[Rebel Yell]

I give up cleaning and simplify cooking. Laundry is easy, DIamond does her own, almost nothing we own needs to be ironed. Deep=cleaning is rare. Breakfast is rarely cooked- eachof us gets our own when hungry.  Lunches are simple, mid-level healthy...  turkey hot sogs and applesauce, good-brand deli meats, homemade mac-n-cheese, ramen noodles (no MSG pack!) and canned chicken.  Dinner is usually homemade, mostly scratch- I do use jar spaghetti sauce.

 

I also use simpler materials for school. Anythign that requires hours of advance planning and specific library books rarely gets done.

[Farrar]

I'm not totally sure how to respond.  Different people have different standards of cleanliness and different desires.  Dh is around and he does help with housework and kids, though not cooking.  My kids are olderish.  If I wanted the house to be spotless - or as spotless as a century old house without a full remodel can ever be - then it could be.  But that's not an important value to me.  I tidy up daily.  I do a quick sweep, dust, and wipe every couple of days or so.  I do a deeper clean of something every couple of weeks or so.  But there's dust.  There's things not put away.  It's not perfect.  And I don't care.  I won't give up the time I want for other projects and for myself in order to keep the house spotless.

[Ameena]

I'm not quite sure how to answer. I'm a Single SAHM who is also a WAHM. I have 1 kiddo. We switched to SL for simplicity & ease of doing school elsewhere {like on the bus}. My house is often a wreck, but I do try to clean as often as I can. Meals here are sometimes from scratch, sometimes from quick fix. I try to do from scratch things that don't take a long time, or can be left cooking for a bit while I shuffle laundry or do a bit of cleaning.

 

We don't do any outside activities - I can't imagine trying to add in something else consistently right now!

[idnib]

My "other" thing that I don't do:

 

I don't keep a lot of stuff around. My house is pretty small (900 sf for 4 of us)  and mostly decluttered.

 

This means I don't buy things that tempt me. Our curriculum (minus literature we check out from the library) for both kids could fit in a small suitcase. I'm pretty ruthless about culling toys, books, magazines, clothes, etc. I have a limit of how many pants, shirts, etc each person gets to have. We only have 2 towels/person, 2 full sets of sheets/bed, etc.

 

 

Also, the kids help:

 

5 yo: make bed, take out recycling, sweep kitchen floor, set table, pick up toys, "help" with cooking, fold and put away her laundry

 

9 yo: take out trash and compost, deal with cans on trash day, make bed, open all blinds and shades, pick up toys, clear table, load laundry, move to dryer, and bring it back up from basement, put away clothes, help with cooking (inc. making scrambled eggs, which really helps in the morning).

 

I need to teach them the older one to load the dishwasher. I've been putting it off because 1) I'm really picky about how it's loaded and 2) I love my dishes. 

 

 

[bobbeym]

I outsource most everything to my kids!

 

I work FT outside the home, with a daily 1.5 hr commute.  DH is home with the kids but he has health issues and isn't able to do as much as he'd like.

 

We do make most of our meals from scratch due to allergies and other food-related health concerns.  Deep cleaning is rare; I don't much care about the dust bunnies and cobwebs until they get in my way.  And since we're in high school now, most of the learning is independent.

 

We always tell the kids that we already know how to keep a house clean, feed ourselves, do laundry, etc. It's our job as their parents to make sure they can do that too.

[8filltheheart]

I couldn't even begin to answer the poll. I have more than 2 kids. I have one under 5. I cook, clean, and do laundry every day. I use teacher intensive materials. My dh will help fold laundry, grill out, or clean if he has to. My kids are responsible for cleaning their own rooms and putting away their laundry (except for the 3 yo). The older kids clean the kitchen after dinner. They help clean on the weekend.

 

I can't function in clutter or chaos. I need order and cleanliness. The younger kids room is their play room......I avoid it as much as possible. ;) They have to put everything away one day/week.

[twoxcell]

I voted other because none of the other choices really applied. I have 4 kids 10,7,5,3. I do use pretty teacher intensive curricula and I don't clean during school hours. During the school year the kids all have chores after school and I do a clean up before bed. More intense cleaning is done on the weekends and I do deep cleaning/organizing during school breaks. We rarely eat out and I cook almost all of our meals but I wouldn't call them complicated meals. My dh is around a lot but I do most of the cleaning, cooking, and school. My house often looks lived in and has school and kids stuff around, but I try to keep it fairly neat. It is impossible to keep it like a catalog and I don't even try. ;)

[Arcadia]

My hubby is better at housework, my kids are old enough to help and my home is small.  I cook simple one pot meals. If anyone close wants to drop by on short notice, it is very easy to get the house clean and tidy fast.

[Sobeknofret]

I don't deep clean as often as I probably should, and we're pretty untidy anyway, but things are generally picked up and there's nothing *dirty* around. Outsourcing takes more money than I have, and honestly, as long as things are not dirty, I can live with a little clutter and untidiness.

[Hoot]

I'm not sure this poll is really reflective of the answers you want to know.  Almost all of these questions are true of me and my home, but it has nothing to do with my house being a pit or giving up anything in order to do other things.

 

I have 1 child and he is over 5.  Blessedly, I haven't been pregnant recently. - No reason for either of these things; it's just the way it is.

 

My partner is around a lot to help out.  -  DH is home by 6pm almost every night and does not work on weekends.  In fact, he's off most Fridays as well.  He drives DS to his sports activities, cleans our shower, does all of the outdoor work, does the grocery shopping, and cooks dinner.  He does these things because he likes to or simply prefers to do them himself.

 

I do not cook most meals from scratch - because DH likes to cook.  

 

I do not clean much; I either outsource it, or I just do the basics and don't often get to deeper cleaning.  -  I don't really even know how to answer this.  DS and I keep the house clean with the exception of the things that DH does.  We do the basics (tidying, dishes, vacuum, sweep etc.) everyday and the deeper things get done as needed.  I probably spend 1 - 2 hrs. total keeping my house clean everyday, which I think is perfectly reasonable.     

 

I do not use teacher-intensive educational materials, and/or my children are of an age where they work very independently. - Again, I don't even know how to answer this.  I don't use materials that require me to do tons of planning and intensive teaching and DS is pretty independent.  However, during the time when DS is doing his work, I am "on."  For many subjects I opt to sit near him and work on my own stuff but I don't have to be overly involved most of the time.  
 

[julikins]

Well, I outsource heavy cleaning and we all have chores that take care of the daily chores.  I don't live in the States so convenience foods and eating out aren't options.  I make everything from scratch.  My kids mostly work on "do the next thing" type of curriculum, but that doesn't mean that I don't have to be around to guide and help.  We do our mom-intensive subjects when baby are asleep and my wonderful husband has taken over science--my nemesis! I still struggle to get to the mom-intensive subjects done though. 

 

I'm just so tired running after the one year old, cooking, teaching, and dealing with daily chores that by the time afternoon hits when baby is napping--I'm exhausted and I fall asleep during the read-aloud! I'm working on this by trying to take a short nap during the time my husband teaches science after lunch.  Let's see if that solves the problem.  

 

If my life were just homeschool that would be one thing, but once school is out we start a whole new marathon.  I just try to take one part of my day at a time and "keep on swimming."

[Alte Veste Academy]

I find it telling that the OP in this thread and the OP in yesterday's thread both have five kids, including two very young children. When I had three kids 3 and younger, yes, I struggled to get everything done, and I was not even teaching anyone! My kids are now 7, almost 9, and 10, and I pretty much get everything done. I cook from scratch, keep the house tidy daily and clean at least weekly, and use teacher intensive curricula with kids who are not yet independent. Yes, DH helps (when he is home, and the workload is decreased when he is gone, so that is a factor that pretty much evens out). But the kids also help. They clean their own rooms (straighten daily and "perfect clean" on Fridays) and have chores around the house that truly contribute to the running of the household, no fluff now that they are older. Chores, not "chores" like they did when they were younger. You know, the kind that take mom more work to supervise and fix than actually help? I remember those... LOL

 

So anyway, I didn't comment on the thread yesterday because it seemed like a (perfectly reasonable!) JAWM, but on this thread, I did want to post to encourage people that it is possible and that not all homeschoolers constantly feel like they are constantly juggling and dropping balls. I have said before that I sometimes intentionally drop balls here, and that is just no biggie with me. On a pretty day, I absolutely will choose to take a glass of iced tea and a book out to my swing and not clean my bathroom, but it is a conscious choice, not something I just couldn't get to.

 

Anyway, I think letting things slip is sometimes about the sheer number of things you MUST do in a day that cannot be put off. Diapers must be changed, babies must be fed, little people must be helped, spills must be mopped up... At the point when my youngest turned 5, my life seemed to magically become much easier!

[mommymilkies]

Well, I outsource the smaller cleaning jobs to the kids and occasionally pay them to pick up sticks or piles of weeds in the garden (I'm a lazy gardener), etc.  But I cook almost everything from scratch except breakfast (only from scratch 1-2 times a week-I am NOT a morning person).  I do all the deep cleaning, mopping, vacuuming, sweeping, laundry, etc. The kids each have a chore like walking the dog, feeding the pets, emptying half the dishwasher, cleaning the table, etc. 

 

Dh will fold and put away a pile of laundry once every 2 weeks or so and will help clean what can't go in the dishwasher a couple times a week.  He does do a lot of chauffering to activities, though, but I am the one that takes a full day to take them to violin each week.  

 

I guess my house is "clean".  Maybe not as much as I want.  I would like it more decluttered and cleaner, but my kids don't tolerate that long.  :lol:  I think people have different standards, though.  I spent half an hour getting my living room rug perfectly aligned last night because it was driving me nuts.  I guess look at my blog to see my messy house.  It looks the worst around lunch time when school stuff is EVERYWHERE and there is play dough and legos and dishes all over everything. I do spend a lot of my day feeling like I am precariously juggling everything, though.  

[angelmama1209]

I give up cleaning and simplify cooking. Laundry is easy, DIamond does her own, almost nothing we own needs to be ironed. Deep=cleaning is rare. Breakfast is rarely cooked- eachof us gets our own when hungry.  Lunches are simple, mid-level healthy...  turkey hot sogs and applesauce, good-brand deli meats, homemade mac-n-cheese, ramen noodles (no MSG pack!) and canned chicken.  Dinner is usually homemade, mostly scratch- I do use jar spaghetti sauce.

 

I also use simpler materials for school. Anythign that requires hours of advance planning and specific library books rarely gets done.

 

this is me.  i have 4-soon to be 5- 8 and under.. i wish i could afford a cleaning lady. i'm not overly fond of cooking, especially right now. we survive. my house is a mess, but my kids are healthy. school is random, but we school year round. hubby's schedule changes every 4 months and he usually continues to work when he gets home. i'm working on training my kids, but consistency is not my strong point so it is slow going.

[smfmommy]

I have 6 children, 1 under 5.  All the children pitch in (as they are able) to keep the house clean.  I have a schedule of sorts to get the deep cleaning done.  I make from scratch almost all the meals - at least one child makes one dinner each week. 

 

Hubby works a 40 hour work week and maybe small amounts of overtime.  While he will help out if asked I tend to 95% of the household management.   would rather he spend his limited time being with the children - not mowing the lawn or whatever else we can do on our own.

 

I don't choose curriculum that is highly teacher intensive but I am still teaching young ones and every curriculum takes time at that age.  By middle school they can handle most of the work on their own.  But I am very accessible to answer questions no matter what age.

 

My days are full, even when my calendar is empty.  Things get easier as the children get older and can really help.  If you can outsource great.  If you can't, focus on the basics (just reading writing and arithmetic, just the basic cleaning, simple dinners) until the next season.  And the next season will come.

 

 

[mrs.m]

I outsource a lot to my kids. DH does laundry on Mondays and Wednesdays. I finish it on Friday night or Saturday morning. DD does her own laundry. And I hired someone to come in and deep clean once per week for a couple hours. (I know that isn't an option for everyone.)

[Alice]

I'm not totally sure how to respond.  Different people have different standards of cleanliness and different desires.  Dh is around and he does help with housework and kids, though not cooking.  My kids are olderish.  If I wanted the house to be spotless - or as spotless as a century old house without a full remodel can ever be - then it could be.  But that's not an important value to me.  I tidy up daily.  I do a quick sweep, dust, and wipe every couple of days or so.  I do a deeper clean of something every couple of weeks or so.  But there's dust.  There's things not put away.  It's not perfect.  And I don't care.  I won't give up the time I want for other projects and for myself in order to keep the house spotless.

 

This. 

 

I have learned from these kind of  threads that “a pit†and “deep cleaning†mean vastly different things to different people. I have no problem keeping our house reasonably clean and tidy. What that means for me is that I take care of the dishes and wipe down the kitchen after meals, I sweep the floor most days, I put things away and do a general tidy most days. Laundry is done and put away regularly. Weekly I dust a little, vacuum and clean the bathrooms. Anything else gets cleaned as it gets dirty. However, I don’t do things like clean the blinds or baseboards or dust everything. I don’t really do any kind of scheduled deep cleaning. I’ll realize something like the fridge needs cleaning and I’ll do it. For some people my house would be very clean. For others they might describe it as dirty if they saw the dusty corners and smudges on the windows. I think that’s why these polls are hard and it’s hard to give other people advice on these topics. It’s hard to know what someone else’s standards really are. 

[Desert Strawberry]

None of the options apply to me.

I don't mop as often as I'd like.

my kids help a lot. I have no adult help.

The outside of our house is neglected. We do well to mow, but the weeding and trimming and all of that happens more rarely than I'd like.

The interior of our house is in the midst of the worlds slowest renovation. Lots of unfinished projects.

The day to day is fine though - 3 hot meals, laundry done, dishes washed, house tidy, school done.

We have 4 kids, 2 under 5.

[tjlcc]

I voted "other".

 

What works for me in this busy season of life is to designate certain areas of cleaning for different days of the week.  Mondays are bathrooms, Tuesdays we clean the kitchen and porch, Wednesdays are the bedrooms, Thursdays are the living areas and mopping.  Friday is our spillover day for anything we didn't get to on the other days.  My older two boys do their own laundry on Sundays.

 

Menu planning helps me stay on track and I've recently revised our grocery list and plan to monthly shop for our staples, with shopping for produce weekly.

 

We also tidy things as we are finished with them.  Toys, crafts, etc.  Clutter causes me stress.

 

We clean our kitchen/dining area together after meals and the floors get swept daily.

 

My older two boys also help out with mowing and barn chores (goats/chickens), and we all garden together.

 

A goal for myself is to wake at least 45-60 mins. before my kids to do daily prep work.  I like to have breakfast prepped the night before if possible (baked oatmeal, pancakes, etc.) and I do lunch prep (our main meal) while breakfast is cooking.

 

 

[BakersDozen]

None of the options apply to me, either.  No family in the area to help and even if there was family I wouldn't expect them to help.  We don't eat out.  My house is very, very clean (deep kind of clean) and has been since I had my first baby (I had a mom who was incredibly clean and efficient to teach me - yeah!).  I use teacher intensive materials/programs along with some not as intensive.  I'm not pregnant (boo).  

[Embassy]

I didn't vote.  I do outsource some cleaning to my kids, but try to do some on the weekends.  During the week I try to keep up with the dishes and laundry.  I work part-time and homeschool using lots of teacher-intensive materials.  I say that because I am usually working with one kid or more throughout the day.

[Mommy22alyns]

Just 2 kids here, not pregnant.  I outsource a lot of cleaning to them, actually.  My curriculum is about 50/50 teacher intensive/independent.  I don't have any extra help, family, or neighbors.  DH is around for limited hours and usually takes care of the dishes and a little laundry.

[Alte Veste Academy]

I'd say my kids are way messier at their current ages than when they were under 5 though.

 

This is true here too. DS10 does pretty involved science and tinkering projects and DD is heavily into crafts (think teensy pieces of paper and glitter). DS7 pulls out every Lego we own when he plays Legos. The enormous difference is that they clean up after themselves without my help.

[EmilyGF]

I freezer cook 14 meals at a time. But they are easy meals, and it goes quickly. I crock pot a lot so I can cook when I have energy and time.

 

I don't drive a lot because we live in the city. If we go places, we generally walk, so I get exercise, good time with kids, and transportation at the same time.

 

We don't schedule almost anything more than 2 miles from our house.

 

I clean as needed. The place is never perfect, but it is never nasty.

 

I stashed most of my children's toys in the closet when we moved, saying I'd take them out as they missed them. Guess what? They don't miss them. They bike outside and make collages out of used newspaper. I'll probably get them out in winter, but it has really helped.

 

I'm training my 6 and 8 year-olds. It is worth the time! (My 4-year-old comes along, but isn't actually contributing yet.) Baby still brings tons of disorder at 20 months.

 

Emily

[Critterfixer]

My home is lived in. Hard.

I long ago decided that the purpose of a home is to be lived in, and should facilitate the living, not dictate it. I don't do well in disorder. None of my children do well with disorder. My cats abhor disorder. Even the dogs, who like to mess things up, are obviously happier when their beds are made up, their water bowls are pristine and their room space is neat and picked up. The chickens are even tidy animals who prefer their nest boxes just so, and have a routine they live by.

 

So I got a routine.

The goal isn't to keep the house clean. Not going to happen. It's simply to keep the space ready to be lived in. I have housekeeping  two hours a day, four days per week. I really could do with adding a fifth day, but at present can't do it. Most of the time, that is enough time to keep things neat and clean. I have two periods per day of 30-45 minutes for basic chores related to the animals and basic things like laundry and dishes.

 

What I don't do:

Baseboards. I don't clean where there isn't a significant reward for the investment of my time.

I probably ought to apply that same philosophy to things like gardening, but I'm not THAT logical.

[Soror]

4 kids, 9 month old, 3.5 yr old, 6 and 9 y.o. The house is as clean as I care to keep it. I actually try not to let myself get too anal about it. The kids are expected to help. I cook homemade meals as I like us to eat healthy and being gf our options are limited. Eating out is about 1 x a month. I do not cook near as fancily as I would like to as I love cooking but these days it is not worth my effort. I use teacher intensive curriculum.

 

What I don't do:

- stay up late

- over commit myself- I say no when I need to and prioritize my family and my sanity

-tons of outside activities- we live in a rural area so everything requires a drive so right now we have 2 activities Scouts/AHG and Co-Op (non-formal park dates)

- yard projects and much in the way of self-sustainability - I generally love working outside and thrive on such things but since pregnancy and my wretched insomnia and then the newest baby I am shelving such things until the baby is bigger.

 

I could do more than I do actually. I like having some down time though, especially with a very *ahem* clingy and spirited baby. As AVA mentioned though generally I make conscious choices not to do more though. Perhaps that is laziness but meh I feel pretty good about how our life is balanced in relation to our priorities.

[TracyP]

I voted other since none of those are true in my house. My kids help out, we have a good routine, and we have a work before play mantra (which applies to me more than anybody ;) ).

 

My dh does get home at 4:30 every day so I considered voting that way. But while I love having him home, I don't think it would change anything if he came home later. It is possible, though, that his presence is more helpful than I realize.

[mamamindy]

I didn't read all the replies...but I agree with what Alte Veste said above.  I also have several small children, and this is just a challenging season of life.  So, so fun, but TIRING!  I used to have a much cleaner house, but now I'd prefer to sleep. ;)  For this recovering clean-freak, I'm trying to not worry so much about the inevitable mess.  I am thankful that my big girls are able to help out more and more every day.  Hang in there, OP!! :grouphug:

 

ETA: I voted "other" btw.  None of the options applied to me.

[craftyerin]

My husband makes dinner 4-5 nights a week.  

 

My house is clean, organized, and (relatively) clutter free.  I have young kids, but no babies.  Their work is almost all teacher-intensive due to their ages. 

[Just Another Jen]

I voted other. I have 4 kids at home ages 8-19. At the moment our main floor is gutted down to the studs. So, since cleaning consists of vacuuming the plywood we are on top of things.

When I had 5 kids at home and a finished house things were harder. Mostly because I didn't insist that the older kids help. Now I know better.

[JessReplanted]

I'm an 'other'. My kids are 10, 7, & 6, and I'm going through a very challenging pregnancy with baby #4.

 

My husband has days when he is around a lot. Sometimes he helps with the housework, and sometimes (more often)

he just contributes to the mess.

 

I don't have family or friends who help (or a maid - but that would be amazing!)

Our house is never really 'clean' unless I know someone is coming over.

On a typical school day I manage to keep up the kitchen and do at least 1 load of laundry. We have the kids help 'pick up',

but that is just constant. Deep cleaning only happens if I'm unusually motivated or if I'm expecting company.

 

I cook dinner every night but I don't make everything from scratch. I try to keep things simple because I really don't enjoy cooking.

 

And, at this point, school is still very 'teacher intensive'.

[Sahamamama]

I couldn't even begin to answer the poll. I have more than 2 kids. I have one under 5. I cook, clean, and do laundry every day. I use teacher intensive materials. My dh will help fold laundry, grill out, or clean if he has to. My kids are responsible for cleaning their own rooms and putting away their laundry (except for the 3 yo). The older kids clean the kitchen after dinner. They help clean on the weekend.

 

I can't function in clutter or chaos. I need order and cleanliness. The younger kids room is their play room......I avoid it as much as possible. ;) They have to put everything away one day/week.

 

That's me, too! :)

 

My children (6, 6, 8) all have chore charts, and the assignments rotate. We did end up going with the Bug Chore Girls idea for chores, not homeschool days. Butterfly Girl cleans the upstairs bathroom (with help), stocks toilet paper, and wipes out the sinks every other day with Clorox wipes. Ladybug Girl takes care of our floors with a cordless hand vacuum and/or the Swiffer and/or the broom (different assignments each day). Bumblebee Girl alternates trash round-up and laundry round-up.

 

They all have personal chores, such as "Organize your closet and dresser drawers [Monday]" or "Change your sheets [Friday]." They also help fold and put away a large portion of the laundry. Finally, they each have a Meal Job, which rotates. For example, one child will be on Table Set & Clear, another on Meal Prep & Put Away, and the third on Hopper (gets up for things we forget) & Floors (cleans up floors after meals).

 

We try to keep our meals healthy and simple. My husband helps me with cooking. We also will get something take-out from time to time (pizza, Chinese food).

 

I couldn't stand to let it all fall apart, because then it would affect my motivation and ability to think clearly. I'm just wired that way -- can't think with tons of visual clutter.

 

Now, if it's tucked away in a closet, and the door can close, that's another story! :lol:

[happypamama]

I find it telling that the OP in this thread and the OP in yesterday's thread both have five kids, including two very young children. When I had three kids 3 and younger, yes, I struggled to get everything done, and I was not even teaching anyone! My kids are now 7, almost 9, and 10, and I pretty much get everything done. I cook from scratch, keep the house tidy daily and clean at least weekly, and use teacher intensive curricula with kids who are not yet independent. Yes, DH helps (when he is home, and the workload is decreased when he is gone, so that is a factor that pretty much evens out). But the kids also help. They clean their own rooms (straighten daily and "perfect clean" on Fridays) and have chores around the house that truly contribute to the running of the household, no fluff now that they are older. Chores, not "chores" like they did when they were younger. You know, the kind that take mom more work to supervise and fix than actually help? I remember those... LOL

 

So anyway, I didn't comment on the thread yesterday because it seemed like a (perfectly reasonable!) JAWM, but on this thread, I did want to post to encourage people that it is possible and that not all homeschoolers constantly feel like they are constantly juggling and dropping balls. I have said before that I sometimes intentionally drop balls here, and that is just no biggie with me. On a pretty day, I absolutely will choose to take a glass of iced tea and a book out to my swing and not clean my bathroom, but it is a conscious choice, not something I just couldn't get to.

 

Anyway, I think letting things slip is sometimes about the sheer number of things you MUST do in a day that cannot be put off. Diapers must be changed, babies must be fed, little people must be helped, spills must be mopped up... At the point when my youngest turned 5, my life seemed to magically become much easier!

Yes. This nailed it. I definite "pit" or "not clean" or "from scratch" however anyone wants to define them, and I realize that those definitions will vary. My poll was more to encourage moms who do often feel that there just aren't enough hours in the day, that sometimes you have to put off your personal ideal of how you'd *like* something to go in order to do the things that *need* to be done, and that that is okay! I've also noticed that when I chat with local moms, one of us will say, "I couldn't do what you do," and that's really true -- I couldn't do what someone else does, in the context of my own situation, and vice versa (like, we do very few outside activities because with DH gone long hours and living rurally, I just don't have time for a lot of driving, but I have a friend whose children do a lot of outside activities, and teaching materials that require a lot of pre-planning on her part are not right for their faily -- it's all good). And I was just curious: if you have to let your ideal go in some area, where is it?

[abba12]

I think this poll is missing an important option, child labour! Lol.

 

Seriously though, by the time i, as the eldest, was 10, my mother did very little daily cleaning, i did laundry, sister did bathroom and vaccuming, little ones did regular pickup and we had an alternating chart for dishes. It only took each of us a max of an hour a day including cleaning bedrooms etc, and was spread throughout the day

 

I cant wait till my daughter can at least pick up her toys properly each night, that is one of my biggest chores

 

ETA: lest you think she did nothing, we did the chores but she cooked and schooled 4 kids. We all know how long those tasks take. If she cleaned too she would have very little time to be mum, interacting and talking etc

[Mystie]

We don't do outside activities.

 

Sometimes the house stays fairly decent and sometimes it's cluttery and sometimes is dirty...its always changing, but it's always livable and not super embarrassing.

 

 

I spend our homeschooling time working with my kids, but nothing requires a lot of extra prep on top of that. I don't do elaborate studies (we just read and talk) or projects.

 

For my entire motherhood "career" I have worked at growing myself and my capacities. So even though I have more responsibilities and a bigger house and bigger family now, I actually clean better and cook better than I did with fewer and with only relaxed homeschooling. I have consistently invested time and energy and thought into my own efficiencies, organization, and energy-growth (like learning that exercise really does give more energy if you stick with it). I have not regretted that investment.

 

[swellmomma]

None of the options are true for my family.  Single mom, 4 kids, although youngest turns 6 next month, oldest is like a big toddler, plus home daycare children.  I can not afford to outsource cleaning, I do all the cooking, and due to the special needs of the kids I use teacher intensive curriculum, and all my kids have many outside activities.  If I could let the house go I absolutely would.  But I can't, it must be clean for work.  SO what do I not do?  I don't sleep.  I average 3-4 hours a night in order to fit in everything I need to fit in all day.  THis summer I was lazy, I slept more, I cleaned less, of course many of my kids were gone, and my house is a pit, meals are lousy, we are all grumpy as a result and for what? a couple more hours of sleep.  Nah, I'll go with less sleep if it means more peace, and more sanctuary in my home.

[Soror]

For my entire motherhood "career" I have worked at growing myself and my capacities. So even though I have more responsibilities and a bigger house and bigger family now, I actually clean better and cook better than I did with fewer and with only relaxed homeschooling. I have consistently invested time and energy and thought into my own efficiencies, organization, and energy-growth (like learning that exercise really does give more energy if you stick with it). I have not regretted that investment.

Same here. I am much better at keeping up with everything now then I did when I only had 1.

[Random]

None of those are true for me.

 

I have lots of kids, including little ones, make meals from scratch, do deep cleaning, have no family nearby or outsourced help, use intensive materials, and my husband works long hours and is away frequently.

 

I'm tired and each day is long and difficult. I have learned to be more efficient and make better use of time.

 

Same here, but I only have 4 kids.  My husband is not available to help; he's away or he's exhausted from long hours at work.  I work part time from home at night.  I have a son with severe food allergies.  I tend to use labor-intensive curricula.  We live in a rural area and have to drive 45 miles one way for a grocery store or music lessons, and 3 hours one way for medical specialists.

 

The one thing I'd add is that my children are great at doing their chores.  Every night, after dinner, we all work until all the work is done.  It makes a huge difference.  I let the messes go until that time.  In other words, we get the house clean once a day, and that's enough for me.  If you come over at 4 PM, you'll see toys out and folded laundry that might not be put away, yet.  But, it will all get taken care of after dinner.  Also, now that my children are older (ages 5-11) they are loads more help than they used to be. 

 

Usually in the afternoons, between school and dinner prep, is when I will do my deep cleaning or bulk cooking.

[Maela]

My husband is around quite a bit.  He's a teacher, so summers off.  Also we live very close to his school, so he's home no later than four almost every day.  He knows how to cook better than I do, and cooks dinner 1-2 nights a week.

 

I don't do a whole lot of messy crafts.

 

 

ETA: oh, and I only have two kids, but one is still under five and can be a handful.

[airforcefamily]

Now that I think about it more there is one thing I do to make things 'easy':

 

I use disposable items and buy cleaning products. When we had fewer kids I used cloth diapers, cloth baby wipes, kitchen rags, regular dishes all the time, homemade cleaners, etc.. Now we use disposable diapers and wipes, paper towels, off the shelf spray cleaners, disposable cleaning wipes, and sometimes paper plates.

 

It's helped keep laundry from piling up, dishes from stacking up, and has kept time open for other things besides cleaning. We generate an entire extra rolling trash tote full of garbage every week and I know it's terrible for the environment but sometimes sanity has to take priority.

[Ameena]

Now that I think about it more there is one thing I do to make things 'easy':

 

I use disposable items and buy cleaning products. When we had fewer kids I used cloth diapers, cloth baby wipes, kitchen rags, regular dishes all the time, homemade cleaners, etc.. Now we use disposable diapers and wipes, paper towels, off the shelf spray cleaners, disposable cleaning wipes, and sometimes paper plates.

 

It's helped keep laundry from piling up, dishes from stacking up, and has kept time open for other things besides cleaning. We generate an entire extra rolling trash tote full of garbage every week and I know it's terrible for the environment but sometimes sanity has to take priority.

We do this too, when things are really hectic or when I am not feeling well. I do make some cleaners, but they are things that can be made in less than a minute {window cleaner mostly or floor cleaner}.

 

I tried cloth diapers with my dd & just couldn't handle the constant laundry. While I loved them, we ended up going back to sposies.

[LucyStoner]

None of those things is technically true for me but the first will be true in <5 months when my younger son turns 5.

 

The main reasons my home is not a pit:

 

It's small (3 bdrms, 2 bath <1000 sf)

We don't own a lot of crap

I am not sentimental- I purge stuff easily

I have a system

My kids do chores

I don't have a spotless standard for clean

My husband is not a slob/does not make more work for me and helps when he can (rare though as he is in school ft and works nearly ft).

 

We are planning on TTC in late 2014 or 2015 so that resets our baby years.

[Hoot]

YES!  This exactly.  Umm except my house is bigger than that and we are so. very. NOT TTC.  :)  But, all the rest, absolutely YES!

 

None of those things is technically true for me but the first will be true in <5 months when my younger son turns 5.

The main reasons my home is not a pit:

It's small (3 bdrms, 2 bath <1000 sf)
We don't own a lot of crap
I am not sentimental- I purge stuff easily
I have a system
My kids do chores
I don't have a spotless standard for clean
My husband is not a slob/does not make more work for me and helps when he can (rare though as he is in school ft and works nearly ft).

We are planning on TTC in late 2014 or 2015 so that resets our baby years.

 

 

[Dory]

I only have a couple subjects that are teacher intensive. I have canned fruit, ready sliced meat, and bread for the kids to use for lunch so that I can use that time to clean a couple things. We leave one afternoon a week to do some deeper cleaning and just cycle through the rooms to tidy most the other week. (I will usually have a lot of it cleaned with my lunch time sprees). I have done things like giving a spelling test while I'm canning peaches, or folding laundry while we talk about what we were reading, or while they are reading. I've learned that my house cannot be spotless for the majority of the week and that's ok. If we are eating well, the kids are well educated, and the house gets clean once a week to entertain, than that's good enough. So long as it gets clean sometimes.

 

Oh, and I garden in the evenings after supper or early mornings before school and do any indoor projects after dark.

[happypamama]

Now that I think about it more there is one thing I do to make things 'easy':

 

I use disposable items and buy cleaning products. When we had fewer kids I used cloth diapers, cloth baby wipes, kitchen rags, regular dishes all the time, homemade cleaners, etc.. Now we use disposable diapers and wipes, paper towels, off the shelf spray cleaners, disposable cleaning wipes, and sometimes paper plates.

 

It's helped keep laundry from piling up, dishes from stacking up, and has kept time open for other things besides cleaning. We generate an entire extra rolling trash tote full of garbage every week and I know it's terrible for the environment but sometimes sanity has to take priority.

 

Ah, there's a category I missed, and that's what I was trying to get at -- what gets dropped in order for sanity to take priority.  Thank you for adding your perspective!!

[Coco_Clark]

My kids are all 6 and under. So I only have 1 (1st grade) doing 1.5- 3 hours of school and another (pre-k) joining for an hour. So maybe my "give" is schoolwork itself. But my husband is gone 6am-6pm due to a long commute, I have no family in town and no money for babysitting, I cook from scratch, I deep clean, and obviously learning is very teacher intensive as I only have littles.

 

Like another poster said I wake up early, use time wisely, and go to bed exhausted :P. The best advice I've gotten from homeschooling mommas around me is to wake up early, don't waste time on Facebook/TV/ect (I shouldn't be on this forum right now in fact!), and make sure your kids are pulling their weight as far as housework and meal making goes.

[SailorMom]

We don't have a "picture perfect" home, but that's more from lack of great decorating than anything else :)

I do only have two teen boys, so no little ones running around.

Our house stays clean, meals get cooked, chores get done, etc.  I use very teacher intensive curriculum for the most part.  My DH works 12 hour days and rarely helps around the house (he does yard work, works on the cars, etc.), never helps with school. 

I started following some of Flylady's advice, but I was never anywhere near the level of chaos it seems some of the people who follow her are at.  I am up, dressed, shoes on, bathroom cleaned, laundry started, etc., first thing in the morning.  Before I go to bed all the laundry is folded, dishwasher is running, sink is empty.  I do deep cleaning 15 minutes a day every day in whatever "zone" I'm in, and have daily tasks all week long both for the house and for school.

I have found that I must : Get up by 6am, do what is on my list no matter what, Only allow 10 minutes for emails and Facebook in the morning, and about 15 at lunch for this, and never surf the net. I do not watch TV until after 9pm to watch the news, etc.

I actually hate regimentation.  I thought this would be a nightmare for me.  I like the THOUGHT of living loosey-goosey.  But the reality was that I was always feeling overwhelmed, the house was never as clean as I wanted it, school was getting missed, work was not getting graded, laundry would pile up, etc. 

I love the fact that now, at any time of the day (after 6:30 am), someone can knock on my door and I can invite them in for tea or coffee and never be embarrassed by anything in my house, and already be dressed!!  And - I actually get that a lot.... well - people showing up unannounced for some reason or another.  I don't even have to rush to close doors, lol.

Now - I absolutely do not believe that a person with small children and any kind of life can keep a house as clean as I am keeping mine now.  I have teen sons with chores (they take care of their own laundry, bathroom, doggie-doo, etc.), I do not have to hold a baby, I do not have a toddler drawing on walls.  Anyone with kids that young needs to cut themselves some slack and try to enjoy their kids while they can :)  My house was far and away messier than it is now when my kids were young.

Oh - I want to add that I do go to bed wiped out...  insomnia is no where near the problem it was before for me, lol.....