Looking for your thoughts on this situation.

[Desert Rat]

As this situation has resolved itself and I thank you all kindly for your responses (I've learned a lot!), if you'd like to continue this conversation, please start your own thread and let this one die out. It's starting to turn ugly anyway and I'm going to be forced to go find a picture of a kilt or cupcakes, or men in kilts eating cupcakes (as posted in #158).

 

First, let me clarify this is not a vaccination/anti-vax thread. I think that's been covered enough here. Please do not turn it into an argument about vaccinations.

 

A person in a local homeschool group of which I am a member has a child with chicken pox. She has posted that she is having a playdate tomorrow for anyone who would like to expose their children to the chicken pox virus with the intent that they will get it also.

 

What do you think of this?

 

If you don't vaccinate, is this a common idea in non-vaccinating circles? Are there other viruses that people also encourage exposure to besides chicken pox?

 

I would really appreciate your CIVIL input. Again, this is not another vaccination thread. This is situation specific.

 

I would like to see if my reaction is appropriate for this situation.

 

I look forward to hearing what you all have to say.

Edited October 24, 2012 by Kalah

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

First, let me clarify this is not a vaccination/anti-vax thread. I think that's been covered enough here. Please do not turn it into an argument about vaccinations.

 

A person in a local homeschool group of which I am a member has a child with chicken pox. She has posted that she is having a playdate tomorrow for anyone who would like to expose their children to the chicken pox virus with the intent that they will get it also.

 

What do you think of this?

 

If you don't vaccinate, is this a common idea in non-vaccinating circles? Are there other viruses that people also encourage exposure to besides chicken pox?

 

I would really appreciate your CIVIL input. Again, this is not another vaccination thread. This is situation specific.

 

I would like to see if my reaction is appropriate for this situation.

 

I look forward to hearing what you all have to say.

 

It doesn't bother me, it is common in non-vax circles, and I don't know. Many of the non-vaxers I know try to share CP when possible so the kids get natural immunity.

 

I will say, though, that while non-vaxing parents sharing the virus among themselves doesn't bother me in the least, I was surprised and rather :glare: to see a friend bring her son with CP to a very public outing a few weeks ago. Not for my own girls' sake, but for the sake of those who really shouldn't be exposed against their will :(

 

ETA: I've also heard about people sharing pox lollipops as well, but that's more controversial, I think. There was an uproar not long ago about people sending them in the mail, IIRC.

Edited October 22, 2012 by Sweet Morning Air

[Amethyst]

I have seen this many many times on homeschooling local sites. Not my cup of tea, but I understand.

[Catwoman]

I'll probably get flamed for this, but I think it is absolutely idiotic to intentionally expose a child to a contagious disease.

[sparrow]

Yes, I've seen it a number of times in homeschooling circles. No, it's not something I would do.

[WagsWife]

I think it is common, and I don't have a problem with it. I remember when I was young (before the vac came out) parents would do the same thing. You can get the exposure on your own time table. Chicken Pox is brutal as you get older. If my kids had not been vaccinated already, I would have jumped at the chance to get it over with.

[kesmom]

It's pretty common.

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I'll probably get flamed for this, but I think it is absolutely idiotic to intentionally expose a child to a contagious disease.

 

Normally I'd agree with you, but in this case, if you have an otherwise healthy kid, it's much better for them to have CP in childhood. Contracting CP in adulthood can be much more serious. So if you're not going to vax against it, it's better to have them get it when they're kids the "natural" way.

[Plateau Mama]

When my kids were little I prayed and prayed for someone to come down with chicken pox so we could go play. My pediarician was all for waiting and seeing if they could get them naturally before they were forced to get them for school.

 

The CP vac is still fairly new and I have a feeling that we are going to end up with a lot of adults getting really bad cases of CP when their vac wears off.

[bettyandbob]

It's very common among non vaccinating circles.

 

I don't get why people think chicken pox is harmless. My sil was hospitalized for 3 months at age 6 for complications from the disease. Another sil's best friend died from it. At age six she saw her own friend's picture on the obituary page. Her mother knew the girl was very ill and had not told her yet.

 

The other thing I don't get is people who assume you want to be exposed and take their kid to things or have them go run on the playground when every kid in the neighborhood is there because they assume it's ok for their child to expose everyone else since it's harmless.

 

I say go ahead get exposed if you want, then lock your kid away from everyone else until the disease has fully run it's course.

[Catwoman]

Chicken Pox is brutal as you get older.

 

It doesn't have to be brutal. I didn't get Chicken Pox until I was in my mid-thirties. I took Zovirax for it (I think that was what it was called!) and was fine in no time. As long as you get the medicine when you first get the spots, it's not a big deal. Obviously, if you have underlying medical conditions, you could get really sick, but so could a child. Chicken Pox can be pretty nasty for kids, too.

[Slipper]

It's common with those who do not vaccinate. I wouldn't do it but I don't see anything wrong with it.

[Jpoy85]

We dont vax and ive never heard of this and I would not take my children. I think its silly to even consider going. For me its one of those " Just because you can, doesnt mean you should" deals.

[hana]

It's common with those who do not vaccinate. I wouldn't do it but I don't see anything wrong with it.

 

:iagree:

[Catwoman]

I don't get why people think chicken pox is harmless. My sil was hospitalized for 3 months at age 6 for complications from the disease. Another sil's best friend died from it. At age six she saw her own friend's picture on the obituary page. Her mother knew the girl was very ill and had not told her yet.

 

:iagree:

 

And even though it's not usually deadly, it's still miserable to have the chicken pox. As I mentioned in another post, I had it as an adult, took medicine for it, and was fine. I will be thrilled if my ds never catches it as a child. I would never wish illness on my own kid (or anyone else's kid, for that matter.)

 

The other thing I don't get is people who assume you want to be exposed and take their kid to things or have them go run on the playground when every kid in the neighborhood is there because they assume it's ok for their child to expose everyone else since it's harmless.

 

I say go ahead get exposed if you want, then lock your kid away from everyone else until the disease has fully run it's course.

 

:iagree: :iagree: :iagree:

 

I hate it when people act like it's no big deal, because all kids are "supposed" to get it anyway!!! :glare:

 

Not all of us want our children exposed to chicken pox, or any other disease, for that matter. If your kid is sick, keep him home.

[staceyobu]

It is supposed to be less severe in childhood to have the chickenpox. So, if you don't want to vaccinate, it may be the way to go.

 

FWIW, I remember people intentionally exposing kids back in my childhood (pre-vaccination) to get it over with. So, the idea has been around for decades now.

 

I don't think I could purposefully expose my kids to a potentially serious disease. But, I understand those that do it. And, with the high rates of vaccination now, I think it is less likely to get the chickenpox without intentional exposure.

[GinaPagnato]

This is common? Really?

 

We don't vaccinate, and I have never, ever heard of this.

 

 

We are friends with a few families who also don't vaccinate and I have never heard any of them mention such a thing.

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

This is common? Really?

 

We don't vaccinate, and I have never, ever heard of this.

 

 

We are friends with a few families who also don't vaccinate and I have never heard any of them mention such a thing.

 

Most of my friends do not vax, and when someone has CP, the word goes out on FB or via email. People on Mothering.com used to post in the regional sections of the forum looking for pox parties.

 

ETA: For more information:

 

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/11/16/pox-parties-in-the-age-of-facebook/

 

All the articles I could find were negative, of course, so I just picked this one.

Edited October 22, 2012 by Sweet Morning Air

[Karen in CO]

I purposely exposed my youngest to chicken pox when a friend's ds had them. My dd is under-vax'ed because of life-threatening reactions to vaccines. I am happy she has had chicken pox, but I was quite surprised when my fully vax'ed older dd came down with them just as strongly as her younger sister did. Yes, she had 2 doses of the vaccine before exposure to the "wild" virus.

 

I'm old. I had chicken pox on my birthday when I was little because my cousin had them two weeks before and all my relatives brought all their kids over so we could all get them during the summer and no one would have to miss school.

[happypamama]

Not uncommon, and it wouldn't bother me. If my kids came down with CP (one of them has had it; she probably got it from me, as I'm fairly certain I had an outbreak of shingles several years ago), I'd probably tell my friends that they were welcome to come for a playdate if they wanted their kids to get it. Would I take my kids to a CP playdate? I don't know. It might depend on what else we had scheduled for the next few weeks, and it probably would depend on how old my children were. I'm not sure I'd do it right now, since my 15mo is still pretty little (though DD got it at 15 months, and she got the best-case scenario -- only a handful of spots, no itching/discomfort, and the doctor says she is probably immune to getting it again).

[Unicorn.]

It used to be the norm, many years ago. I wouldn't do it, but to each his own.

[Amy in NH]

My kids have been vaccinated. One of them got chicken pox, and another one got it a couple of weeks later. Some of my nonvaxing friends thought about coming over for exposure, but it didn't fit into their plans for the next month to have the full-blown pox at that time. It didn't bother me either way.

[Desert Rat]

Thank you for all the responses. I'm along the lines of Catwoman, so you won't get any flames from me Cat.

All I can think of is the Ookie Mouth episode from Southpark.

And no, I wouldn't go to a pox party. I was miserable when I had them on my 5th birthday and my brother was critically ill at 2.

I'm going to skip the outings in this group for the next month as I don't want the exposure.

To each their own.

[sparrow]

Thank you for all the responses. I'm along the lines of Catwoman, so you won't get any flames from me Cat.

All I can think of is the Ookie Mouth episode from Southpark.

And no, I wouldn't go to a pox party. I was miserable when I had them on my 5th birthday and my brother was critically ill at 2.

I'm going to skip the outings in this group for the next month as I don't want the exposure.

To each their own.

 

I think that's my own concern for my kids. I had them everywhere and I do mean EVERYWHERE--including inside. It was horrible and I was very close to a serious secondary infection because of it :tongue_smilie:.

[Nakia]

I agree with you, Cat.

[WishboneDawn]

It's not just a non-vax thing. Before the vax came out a lot of people who otherwise vaxxed would do this.

 

In the interest of protecting those with immune disorders I would NOT be taking my CP kid out to outings and such.

[Lolly]

I have no problem with it. When my girls were little, a family we regularly played with had her youngers (2ish) come down with cp. Her older dd (4ish) had a birthday party scheduled. She let all the guests know cp was in the house but went ahead with the party for those who wanted to attend. The littles were kept upstairs. We went. We had already been exposed, when they were most contagious, on earlier playdates. Birthday girl came down with them two days after her party. My kids never did. In fact, they were exposed on multiple occasions and never would get them. Still haven't.

[bettyandbob]

I think that's my own concern for my kids. I had them everywhere and I do mean EVERYWHERE--including inside. It was horrible and I was very close to a serious secondary infection because of it :tongue_smilie:.

 

 

My brother and I had them EVERYWHERE too. As a result of scar tissue from pox in our noses and sinuses we had regular serious nose bleeds. I don't have nosebleeds as much anymore. My brother, who is fifty, still get nosebleeds all the time.

[justLisa]

I wouldn't say I think it is idiotic, but it's not a pleasant thought to have CP.

 

Having said that, it is once vax with a lower efficacy, and getting the actual pox may be more effective. To each their own though.

[Farrar]

I wouldn't assume that others in the group took the mom up on the offer though. Such a message went out on our list awhile back and the mom in question later told me only one person from another list came over to get exposed.

 

Common is a funny term. It's well-known and apparently on the rise according to all those articles. But I don't think that many people do it.

[LizzyBee]

It was not unusual before cpox vaccinations became available to expose kids to cpox on purpose. If someone's going to get it, it's much safer (generally speaking) to have it as a child rather than an adult.

Edited October 23, 2012 by LizzyBee

[Catherine]

When my oldest was 4, the vaccine had just become available, but we had not yet been offered it. There was a CP epidemic at his preschool, and he got it. He was very ill. I now know that he had hemorrhagic varicella, which is occasionally fatal. He had a fever over 104 for 4 days that was very difficult to control, he was delirious during that time, he had literally hundreds of pox, which were painful. He was sick for over 3 weeks. He still has prominent scarring. Of course his brother, at six months and still nursing, was barely ill at all (but he still got immunity, fortunately!), but still, I would seriously reconsider intentionally intentionally exposing a child to this illness. It is not always a benign illness.

[Desert Rat]

I wouldn't assume that others in the group took the mom up on the offer though. Such a message went out on our list awhile back and the mom in question later told me only one person from another list came over to get exposed.

 

Common is a funny term. It's well-known and apparently on the rise according to all those articles. But I don't think that many people do it.

 

There have been positive responses to her post. It's a safe bet that people will be infected.

[Catwoman]

There have been positive responses to her post. It's a safe bet that people will be infected.

 

Can I safely assume that you will be avoiding all of those people for the next month or so? ;)

[Gentlemommy]

It's common among non-vax people. :001_smile:I'd take my kids to one. I'd rather them have it while they were young, and have a natural immunity to it for adulthood.:001_smile:

[LittleIzumi]

It's common in non-vaxxing circles here. I selectively vax and varicella is not on my list, and I have contemplated going to one, but it's never been a good time to hole up for a week, or I've had a baby/toddler, and I'm not going to expose a wee one. (And yes, I had CP as a kid and it was supposedly a horrible week, and I don't remember it myself at all, and I have two scars. :p )

[Desert Rat]

Can I safely assume that you will be avoiding all of those people for the next month or so? ;)

 

Indeed. :lol:

[Audrey]

I'll probably get flamed for this, but I think it is absolutely idiotic to intentionally expose a child to a contagious disease.

 

:iagree:

[8circles]

We got CP a few years ago - caught it by accident. We had some people over who wanted to expose their kids. Not sure why it would be so terrible. You are taking chances either way. In this case I'd rather take my chances with wild CP than the reaction we had to the MMR. Neither option is risk-free and we make the choice for each vax/disease separately. Not everyone has the same experience so not everyone will make the same choice.

[JenC3]

Lots of diseases are not benign. Take the flu for example. I had CP twice as a kid as did my brother. Nope it wasn't..umm sit on a bag of ice anyone! My kids are not vaxed for it and I would attend a party at their ages. My dh got it at 16 on a Hawaiian vacation, so not fun. I had a friend's husband get it at 22 and it was AWFUL, really the worse case the Dr. had ever seen. If my kids don't get it by a certain age, I might have them vaxed.

[annandatje]

...A person in a local homeschool group of which I am a member has a child with chicken pox. She has posted that she is having a playdate tomorrow for anyone who would like to expose their children to the chicken pox virus with the intent that they will get it also.

 

What do you think of this? I think those who want to attend should attend. I would not purposefully expose a kid to the disease but if I were a mother working full time or a single mother without childcare help, my answer may be more based in practicality.

 

If you don't vaccinate, is this a common idea in non-vaccinating circles? I have heard of it, but I cannot comment on whether it is common. We have tended to follow our own path without much regard to parenting trends, philosophies or whatever you may call it. Are there other viruses that people also encourage exposure to besides chicken pox? I don't know, but I would be interested to learn whether the same thought process would apply to other communicable diseases. I remember being absolutely thrilled about contacting seven day measles as a second grader because it brought mandatory school absence. I spent a week playing in woods, climbing trees, digging holes, etc. Interestingly, a relatively mild case mumps did me in; I laid around for the course of the ailment. ...I would like to see if my reaction is appropriate for this situation. Why would your reaction not be appropriate? You are not obligated to give any reason for not wanting to attend, just a simple "no, thanks"....QUOTE]

[I.Dup.]

It doesn't have to be brutal. I didn't get Chicken Pox until I was in my mid-thirties. I took Zovirax for it (I think that was what it was called!) and was fine in no time. As long as you get the medicine when you first get the spots, it's not a big deal. Obviously, if you have underlying medical conditions, you could get really sick, but so could a child. Chicken Pox can be pretty nasty for kids, too.

 

 

And even though it's not usually deadly, it's still miserable to have the chicken pox. As I mentioned in another post, I had it as an adult, took medicine for it, and was fine. I will be thrilled if my ds never catches it as a child. I would never wish illness on my own kid (or anyone else's kid, for that matter.)

 

I hate it when people act like it's no big deal, because all kids are "supposed" to get it anyway!!! :glare:

 

Not all of us want our children exposed to chicken pox, or any other disease, for that matter. If your kid is sick, keep him home.

 

I totally agree.

 

My sister and I both had chicken pox as kids, now my sister has had horrible shingles episodes. Also, I still remember how traumatic chicken pox was when I had it as a kid. Some neighbors had it on their eyeballs, down their throats, in their mouths, they couldn't eat, etc. I would not intentionally expose my children to anything, I think it's just silly. I don't believe that it's always horrible as an adult.

[I.Dup.]

oh, and yes, I've heard of this OFTEN and have always thought it to be dumb. But I'm not into having sick kids for any reason.

[Mrs Mungo]

I wouldn't do it. But, it is common among the crunchy crowd. I vaccinated my kids for chicken pox when they were older.

[kalanamak]

FYI, my sister went to a Rubella party for girls in the 50s. They were worried about not being immune before childbearing. It was thrown by a nurse at a fancy girl's college who was ancient and too out of it to know that, as my sister put it, "by 1959 the guys were not insisting on a virgin for a bride."

[SKL]

I think it is common, and I don't have a problem with it. I remember when I was young (before the vac came out) parents would do the same thing. You can get the exposure on your own time table. Chicken Pox is brutal as you get older. If my kids had not been vaccinated already, I would have jumped at the chance to get it over with.

 

:iagree: I was hoping my kids would get exposed to it before they went to school, but since they didn't, I had them vaxed this past summer rather than fight with the school about it.

 

If they get CP while young, it is almost certain to be mild and the immunity will be much greater than with the vax. If you wait and don't vax, and the child catches it past around age 10, it can be much more severe and possibly even deadly.

 

I do think they should warn others that their child has CP and make sure it's OK for the other child. I'm not sure whether chicken pox is dangerous for any child between age 2-8, but it's an inconvenience if nothing else.

[Lisbeth]

I'll probably get flamed for this, but I think it is absolutely idiotic to intentionally expose a child to a contagious disease.

 

This.

[Denisemomof4]

It doesn't bother me, it is common in non-vax circles, and I don't know. Many of the non-vaxers I know try to share CP when possible so the kids get natural immunity.

 

I will say, though, that while non-vaxing parents sharing the virus among themselves doesn't bother me in the least, I was surprised and rather :glare: to see a friend bring her son with CP to a very public outing a few weeks ago. Not for my own girls' sake, but for the sake of those who really shouldn't be exposed against their will :(

 

ETA: I've also heard about people sharing pox lollipops as well, but that's more controversial, I think. There was an uproar not long ago about people sending them in the mail, IIRC.

 

:iagree: i would rather my kid get the virus than the vaccine for this one. I took my kid to someone's house where their chid had CP. They didn't get it anyw ay so got vaccinated when they went to school.

 

SMA, taking a kid out in public with CP like that would INFURIATE me. It could kill an older, non-vaccinated adult. I don't understand how anyone can do this.

 

What the heck is a pox lollipop? One licked by the sick kid then handed out? :svengo:

[bettyandbob]

: I'm not sure whether chicken pox is dangerous for any child between age 2-8, but it's an inconvenience if nothing else.

 

Yes it can be dangerous and yes children in this age group do die from it, including typically developing children who were healthy before they got the disease. I guess you didn't read my post on the first age.

 

Most children do not develop a fatal or near fatal case, but they can. I think a lot of people take the disease too lightly.

[LittleIzumi]

What the heck is a pox lollipop? One licked by the sick kid then handed out? :svengo:

 

Yup. Somehow I feel much more comfy with just hanging out with a CP kid rather than sharing candy, even though the entire point is to share germs. :tongue_smilie: