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Could use some prayers. Back in FL since my son's death...

Kari C in SC
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Kari C in SC

Kari C in SC

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Hi all. We have come down to Florida for a few days. I brought some of my ds' shirts, hoodies and hats to give to his friends. We are going to have dinner with many of them tomorrow night. I know this is what I want to do, but I am very nervous about it all. Where I am in SC, nobody but family actually knew my son. My friends there do not miss him the way we do. When I come home to FL it is all so very real. Everyone loved him here and misses him. I just need prayer that I can do this and it will be okay. I need to try to not fall apart.

 

We are leaving on Sunday for this cruise. Tropical Storm Matthew is freaking me out!

 

I haven't decided if I am going to go to the cemetary. I don't feel like he is there. He is at our old house or with his friends. I just don't see him in an urn in the ground. So, don't know what to do.

 

Could you all just pray for comfort, safety and peace?

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Chris in VA

Chris in VA

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Prayers for you, Kari. What a tenderhearted thing to do, giving the clothing to his friends. When my ds was in residential treatment, I bought a soft blanket for him and spent a few minutes hugging it, then gave it to him so he could feel my hug when I couldn't be with him. Maybe that's a little silly, IDK, but it was a comfort to both of us. I wish I could have something my brother wore so I could "feel his hug," too--I think it's a dear idea and your son's friends are blessed to have his caring mom think of them. :grouphug:

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Miss Sherry

Miss Sherry

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I have not visited my Dad's grave very often because I do not associate him with that place. Maybe if he were buried somewhere where memories of him were attached to it, it would be different. I can see it meaning something for someone buried on their families property where they all had memories of being together. But I am glad for the few times I have been to his grave. There is a little comfort in honoring him that way, but still, it's not the same as it would be if it were a place that I had a lot of fond memories of him at. But going to the burial site may have some meaning for the other family members. I don't know. I do think it would bother me some if there was no place at all to go to in memory of my Dad.

 

Praying for you. :grouphug:

Edited by Miss Sherry
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Lilymax

Lilymax

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Prayers from another "Kari"... :)

 

I understand that feeling of disassociation from the grave itself. I've never felt the need to visit gravesites because I just don't associate the person with that particular place. When my grandmother passed away in August, I was there within an hour, and even as I saw her body there in her bed, all I felt was "This is no longer her." It was the shell that housed her spirit, and when her spirit passed on, my connection to her body was over. And in the oddest way, I felt closer to her than I had in months--I know she is always with me, as your son is always with you now.

 

Hugs, and prayers!

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