chicken pox vax/natural exposure

[BakersDozen]

I'm not going to make this a JAWM as perhaps someone can offer something that will help ease my mama-guilt. Or tell me I deserve the guilt. Most likely the latter.

I had my older kids vaccinated for chicken pox because that's what I was "supposed" to do. Starting with #8 I was delaying vaccinations more, eventually catching up for most but spacing them out rather than multiple vaccinations at once. I was told the cp vaccination wasn't very effective, kids could still get chicken pox, etc. But as none of my kids was getting cp after trying to expose them, I pretty much gave up and determined to get this next "batch" of kids vaccinated. That was last year when COVID shut things down. So my plan was to get them vaccinated this spring after flu season and such was over (I've had one who responded badly to vaccinations so am more hesitant).

But they got exposed to cp and as of tonight I have 4 younger kids with it, 2 really badly. And 2 of my older girls who received the vax also got it albeit very mildly - barely more than an annoyance. My 12yo and my poor 3yo have it the worst thus far. Waiting to see if the other 3 get it.

And I'm rethinking things now that it is too late. I'm thinking I should have gotten them all vaccinated. I'm not anti-vax (save for one which I won't go into here). But of all the illnesses I figured cp was the one to just tackle naturally and have natural immunity.

This isn't worth it. I feel so guilty - they are miserable, 3 of them missed a major hockey tournament this weekend which they were so looking forward to, and my toddler...oh the poor little guy. What was I thinking?? That they would all get a few pox and that's it? Did I not remember what I went through as a kid?? That was so disgusting and so miserable...what was I thinking??



 

[Junie]

(((BakersDozen)))

I think all moms second guess themselves about something and then feel guilt when something happens that they feel could be avoided.

Praying that your kids feel better really soon.

[Melissa in Australia]

hugs

 

I didn't do the chicken pox vax for my older kids. they were very ill. 2 of them had pox under their eyelids  all of them had internal pox as well, on their tongue , down their throat etc. 

 

😞 

 

[Ausmumof3]

If it makes you feel any better we had friends with vaccinated kids who still got it and it went round the school.  I do think vaccinating is a good idea but I wouldn’t beat yourself up too much.  
hopefully they all feel better soon.

we haven’t had chicken pox but find pinetarsol good for itches.

[Guest]

Quote

This isn't worth it. I feel so guilty - they are miserable, 3 of them missed a major hockey tournament this weekend which they were so looking forward to, and my toddler...oh the poor little guy. What was I thinking?? That they would all get a few pox and that's it? Did I not remember what I went through as a kid?? That was so disgusting and so miserable...what was I thinking??

I’m sorry. I feel like, this is what makes me angry about the rhetoric that was circulating about letting kids get CP naturally. I do remember what it was like when I and my sisters all had CP; it was a couple weeks of absolute agony. As an adult, I sometimes got cold sores in my nose (nasal Herpes) and it reminds me of how bad CP was. 

I spent several years in the selective vax/mostly anti camp but when there were measles outbreaks in my state, it really made me ponder how I was going to feel if my kid got sick with a preventable disease. 

[Guest]

3 hours ago, Melissa in Australia said:

hugs

 

I didn't do the chicken pox vax for my older kids. they were very ill. 2 of them had pox under their eyelids  all of them had internal pox as well, on their tongue , down their throat etc. 

 

😞 

 

Thats exactly how I remember it. I had pox “down below” and they burned when I urinated. My sister had them in her throat as well. 

[Carrie12345]

Hugs

My route was the opposite. I had rolled my eyes at the vaccine when my older kids were little. Like Quill, measles outbreaks started to shift my thinking about eliminating viruses, and now they’re all caught up on just about everything. But I can still relate to the concept of ignoring the chicken pox, yk?

Sending good recovery vibes!

[sweet2ndchance]

I still remember getting the chicken pox at age 10 way back before there was a vaccine. I was miserable for about a week. Puking, fever, large itchy pox. The whole nine yards. I remember it vividly. It was no picnic.

Only my oldest son was vaccinated for chicken pox as a toddler. None of my other kids were due to extreme vaccine reactions that caused our doctor to tell me that we are the reason that herd immunity is necessary. My oldest daughter finally caught chicken pox in 6th grade at age 11. My oldest (14yo at the time) got a mild case. My second oldest son (12 at the time) got a pretty bad case. My 6yo and 4yo (at the time) got average cases. My youngest son was 4 months old at the time. He was flat miserable. Just wanted to be held all the time and who can blame him? He also took the longest to get over it.

Yes, the house was miserable for about 2 weeks while everyone went through the worst of it. But everyone survived and everyone is immune now (we've had titers and everyone tested as having antibodies, including my youngest (now 8yo) who was just a baby when he got it). Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.

[klmama]

I got chicken pox as an adult, and my doctor gave me Zovirax, an antiviral usually used for shingles.  I started it within a few days,  and it lessened the symptoms.  It may be too late for the ones that are already miserable, but you might check with your doctor anyway. 

ETA: Sometimes oatmeal baths can sooth itching and irritation.  Maybe that would help them feel a little better?  

Edited March 12, 2021 by klmama

[historically accurate]

Awww, I'd send hugs, but no one wants to be hugged when they have chicken pox. I'm sorry, BakersDozen. I hope they get over it soon. Moms second guess their decisions all the time (or at least I do); try not to feel guilty about this one.

Chicken Pox is actually the disease that put me firmly to the pro-vaccination side. I vividly remember the severity of my case. Eyelids, internal, privates, ear canals, if you could have a pox on a body part, I had it. Somehow, I kept re-catching cp (from my brother who randomly got 1 pock here or there?), and re-starting the misery. I almost ended up hospitalized after over a month. If I could spare my kids that, I decided to line them up for their shots.

[vonfirmath]

7 hours ago, BakersDozen said:

I'm not going to make this a JAWM as perhaps someone can offer something that will help ease my mama-guilt. Or tell me I deserve the guilt. Most likely the latter.

I had my older kids vaccinated for chicken pox because that's what I was "supposed" to do. Starting with #8 I was delaying vaccinations more, eventually catching up for most but spacing them out rather than multiple vaccinations at once. I was told the cp vaccination wasn't very effective, kids could still get chicken pox, etc. But as none of my kids was getting cp after trying to expose them, I pretty much gave up and determined to get this next "batch" of kids vaccinated. That was last year when COVID shut things down. So my plan was to get them vaccinated this spring after flu season and such was over (I've had one who responded badly to vaccinations so am more hesitant).

But they got exposed to cp and as of tonight I have 4 younger kids with it, 2 really badly. And 2 of my older girls who received the vax also got it albeit very mildly - barely more than an annoyance. My 12yo and my poor 3yo have it the worst thus far. Waiting to see if the other 3 get it.

And I'm rethinking things now that it is too late. I'm thinking I should have gotten them all vaccinated. I'm not anti-vax (save for one which I won't go into here). But of all the illnesses I figured cp was the one to just tackle naturally and have natural immunity.

This isn't worth it. I feel so guilty - they are miserable, 3 of them missed a major hockey tournament this weekend which they were so looking forward to, and my toddler...oh the poor little guy. What was I thinking?? That they would all get a few pox and that's it? Did I not remember what I went through as a kid?? That was so disgusting and so miserable...what was I thinking??



 

If it helps -- I had a nurse friend before I ever got married that guided my feel about chicken pox. She felt it was better for younger kids to get chicken pox itself. But to give the vaccination if they had not gotten the pox naturally by 11 or 12 because after that it became a more serious disease. So it sounds like you did exactly what she felt was best for the kids.  There are risks both ways. Being sick is never fun. But she felt there were definite advantages to having the pox naturally rather than through a vaccine.

 

[Dmmetler]

The CP vaccine came into common use while I was teaching, and the difference was striking. Normally, usually about this time of year, we would have almost all the kindergarten kids out over a period of about two months, a decent chunk f first grade, and a handful of kids in upper grades and adults, at least one of whom would be very, very sick (enough to be hospitalized). It was awful. (School population of about 1000, K-8th grade). I don't remember it being bad for preschoolers, and the K kids being out probably didn't really hurt them that much, but the difference for the older students who got sick (some of whom had already had it when younger, but apparently either had it reactivate or didn't get immunity) was dramatic. 

 

Within ONE year of the shot being added to the K entrance protocol, cases dropped down to 2-3 the entire year-The parents who wanted natural immunity. And we simply did not have the upper grades kids/adults getting really, really sick. I was too young to remember the end of prior major illnesses, but that experience was enough to make me recognize vaccines as a medical miracle. 

Edited March 12, 2021 by Dmmetler

[EKS]

2 minutes ago, vonfirmath said:

But she felt there were definite advantages to having the pox naturally rather than through a vaccine.

I'm curious what she felt the advantages were.  Because a huge disadvantage is the potential for developing shingles later in life--my mother almost lost her eyesight to it a few years ago.

[klmama]

3 minutes ago, EKS said:

I'm curious what she felt the advantages were.  Because a huge disadvantage is the potential for developing shingles later in life--my mother almost lost her eyesight to it a few years ago.

I've read people can get shingles after having had  the cp vax, too.  

[City Mouse]

Parents feel guilt about many decisions. If it wasn’t this one, it would be something else. I can’t count all the times I though “If only I had done xxx instead of xxxx”

I am sorry that you kids are so sick.

When I first started teaching over 20 yr ago, I taught 1st grade where chicken pox was a normal thing. I had a student who got a bad infection from scratching (the flesh eating one). She missed over 1 month of school and had a scar from her wrist to her arm pit. That cured me of any hesitation regarding getting my own kids vaccinated.

[Not_a_Number]

I’m really sorry your kids are sick!! I hope they feel better soon.

People are generically bad at figuring out how to weigh “known risk now” with “unknown risk later.” It’s not just you. Don’t beat yourself up.

[EKS]

34 minutes ago, klmama said:

I've read people can get shingles after having had  the cp vax, too.  

Ok--apparently this is true, to the extent that it has happened.  However, the risk of developing shingles goes way down.  See:  https://www.webmd.com/skin-problems-and-treatments/shingles/news/20190610/chickenpox-vaccine-shields-against-shingles-too

[Not_a_Number]

One of my relatives had shingles in her 70s. She’s a very cheery and easygoing person, but she said it was the worst thing ever. Anything that decreases risk is worth it.

[Familia]

Very unenlightened here, so would appreciate someone more knowledgeable to answer a question I’ve had for awhile.

About the shingles risk...isn’t it too soon for them to know if the cp vax prevents shingles since it develops in the older population and there just haven’t been enough years to determine this?   A cursory google query led me to find that the cp vaccine became available in 1995, at least in the US.

Baker’s: I hope that your children all feel better soon! 💐

Edited March 12, 2021 by Familia
Adding well wishes

[fairfarmhand]

Slightly off topic but still relevant....

I had CP as a kid. What do I need to do to avoid getting shingles as an adult? Do I need to ask about the vaccine? I'm in my early 40s.

 

OP, I hope your kids feel better soon!

Edited March 12, 2021 by fairfarmhand

[mommyoffive]

Oh I am so sorry your kids are sick.  It is so incredibly hard to be a parent.  You regret and beat yourself up for all the things should have done and known.  I hope they recover soon.  I had chicken pox badly as a kid and I remember that sucky time.   

[mommyoffive]

9 minutes ago, fairfarmhand said:

Slightly off topic but still relevant....

I had CP as a kid. What do I need to do to avoid getting shingles as an adult? Do I need to ask about the vaccine? I'm in my early 40s.

 

OP, I hope your kids feel better soon!

I think you need to get the vaccine.  My uncle got shingles a few years ago and is still in constant pain.  A friend's husband got shingles really badly and he had horrible pain and long term issues.  Could no longer work or led to seizures.    I am terrified of shingles. 

[Miss Tick]

20 minutes ago, fairfarmhand said:

Slightly off topic but still relevant....

I had CP as a kid. What do I need to do to avoid getting shingles as an adult? Do I need to ask about the vaccine? I'm in my early 40s.

 

OP, I hope your kids feel better soon!

Insurance covers the vaccine at our after 50. I'm keeping my fingers crossed until then. An acquaintance got it and had life-altering side affects.

[MercyA]

Big hugs to you. There are many, many things I wish I had done differently as a parent. You can't change the past, so spoil your kids while they are not feeling good and then move forward! Saying a prayer for them now. 

Who knows? Maybe someone will read this and decided to vaccinate their kids as a result. 

[catz]

I was also going to say, thank you for posting!  It really may help someone else trying to make this decision.  I remember chicken pox and I got my kids that vax right away.  

I hope your kiddos recovery quickly and try not to beat yourself up over it. Every one of us has parental regrets. ❤️  

Most insurance plans won't cover shingles vax until age 50 and it is an expensive one.  Some doctors don't regularly recommend until 60 for otherwise health adults.   My husband's doc just told him that.  But we will definitely both be getting that at some point.   

[Spryte]

Ohhh, I’m sorry your kids are sick.  I hope they feel better soon!

[klmama]

OP, I'm just coming back to say that you shouldn't kick yourself for this.  Even though most people do fine with vaccinations, there are no guarantees, as you already know from your one dc's previous vaccine reactions.  If your dc had all gotten the cp vaccine and any of them had had another bad reaction, you'd be kicking yourself for that now, too.  Guilt is one of those unfortunate givens in parenting.  Just keep doing the best you can for your dc.     

[mmasc]

2 hours ago, EKS said:

I'm curious what she felt the advantages were.  Because a huge disadvantage is the potential for developing shingles later in life--my mother almost lost her eyesight to it a few years ago.

Yes, this. I think the hugest drawback to ‘natural immunity’ for cp is the possibility of shingles later in life. It’s terribly painful and can be very dangerous. I feel like this disease especially has major vaccine benefits vs natural just because of this fact. 

[Ali in OR]

I send you virtually my tee-shirt I haven't yet designed that says, "I'm doing the best I can." No mom guilt. We all have things we would do differently if we could go back, but we do the best we can with the information, time, and energy we have. You all will get through this and have stories to tell.

[Farrar]

Hugs. Hindsight is 20/20. The only thing you can do is nurse them through it now and love on them. In the end, it will almost certainly be okay. And like others are saying, they can get the shingles vax later.

The "natural immunity" for CP rhetoric was really, really strong when my boys were tiny. It was strong enough that I started to second guess getting it before actually deciding to just do it, and I'm pretty pro-vax overall.

[Ali in OR]

My shingles case at age 35 was thankfully mild. I remember chatting with my dad (who is a doctor) on the phone and just randomly saying, "I have this weird rash just on one side of my abdomen." That "one side" comment made him immediately think shingles and I saw my doctor the next day who agreed. I got on the antiviral very early because of that conversation. It's good to know a bit about what shingles can look like so you can respond quickly if needed. But this is a reminder that I should get the vax--I was waiting while it was in short supply thinking it was more important for older folks, but this summer would probably be a good time (like Covid vax, I think you have to be prepared for this one to knock you flat for a day).

[Noreen Claire]

3 hours ago, vonfirmath said:

But she felt there were definite advantages to having the pox naturally rather than through a vaccine.

 

 

5 hours ago, sweet2ndchance said:

But everyone survived and everyone is immune now

 

2 hours ago, fairfarmhand said:

I had CP as a kid. What do I need to do to avoid getting shingles as an adult? Do I need to ask about the vaccine? I'm in my early 40s.

 

This is the thing that people forget when they talk about having chicken pox, and then it being over and done and "better" than the vax.

My brother had shingles two years ago, in his late 30s, and he was MISERABLE. He was in so much pain, and nerve pain is the worst. He was very healthy at the time but he lost TWENTY POUNDS. He missed two full weeks of work (and definitely went back before he was completely recovered). He still has scars from the rash across his torso. It was terrible, and I don't think he has really fully recovered, even now.

[Not_a_Number]

2 minutes ago, Noreen Claire said:

He still has scars from the rash across his torso. It was terrible, and I don't think he has really fully recovered, even now.

Oh no 😞 . How has he not recovered? 

[Noreen Claire]

Just now, Not_a_Number said:

Oh no 😞 . How has he not recovered? 

He does not have the stamina that he did. He gets tired.

[mom2scouts]

My sister and I both got chicken pox as adults. It was horrible. I had a temperature of 105 and I had sores everywhere imaginable, including under my eyelids and in more personal areas. I also have a friend who lost a kidney to chickenpox as a child. Many people think chickenpox is a harmless childhood illness and for many kids it is, but my experience made me think differently. When the chickenpox vaccine first came out my only hesitation was because they didn't know if it would protect into adulthood. I ended up getting my children vaccinated. 

I'm sorry your kids are so sick. I also understand not being too worried about it and putting if off due to Covid, and you can't do anything about it now anyway. Every mother I know feels guilty about some decision she made that didn't turn out as well as expected, but we can't anticipate everything. Forgive yourself and move on.

[prairiewindmomma]

Thank you for sharing your story.

[Spy Car]

4 hours ago, EKS said:

I'm curious what she felt the advantages were.  Because a huge disadvantage is the potential for developing shingles later in life--my mother almost lost her eyesight to it a few years ago.

It's the greater potential for developing shingles later in life that would have me most concerned.

I'm one of those people who was intentionally exposed as a child at a "chicken pox party." A decision my mother regretted in retrospect to the end of her days. At about 50 I came down with shingles. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced by a wide margin. Sadistic torture.

But for the complications of the pandemic I'd consult with my physician to discuss whether a shingles vaccine would be appropriate for me to get now. Shingles is not something you wish loved ones or yourself to experience.

Bill

 

 

[BakersDozen]

2 hours ago, MercyA said:

Maybe someone will read this and decided to vaccinate their kids as a result. 

I hope so.

I was up until 4am with my 3yo. Movies, popsicles, lotions and meds today. I appreciate all of the comments, advice, and encouragement. I thought I was doing the right thing by finding a good balance of waiting for the "ideal" natural exposure or vaccinating if that didn't happen at some point.

The fact that my older girls, who were vaccinated, still got cp is what has taken me by surprise.

[mmasc]

1 minute ago, BakersDozen said:

I hope so.

I was up until 4am with my 3yo. Movies, popsicles, lotions and meds today. I appreciate all of the comments, advice, and encouragement. I thought I was doing the right thing by finding a good balance of waiting for the "ideal" natural exposure or vaccinating if that didn't happen at some point.

The fact that my older girls, who were vaccinated, still got cp is what has taken me by surprise.

I’m so sorry for your little one!

Did your older girls have both vaccine doses on the correct schedule?

[Arcadia]

5 hours ago, klmama said:

I got chicken pox as an adult, and my doctor gave me Zovirax, an antiviral usually used for shingles.

My college classmates took that because they wanted to be back in class within a week.

[BakersDozen]

Just now, mmasc said:

Did your older girls have both vaccine doses on the correct schedule?

Yes

[BakersDozen]

I called our doctor and asked about antiviral but he said only in high-risk patients and at a very certain point/time frame in the cp process. My 16yo is doing fine; 14yo is a bit uncomfortable and has more than her older sister did. So far nothing for my 18yo.

[Arcadia]

20 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

But for the complications of the pandemic I'd consult with my physician to discuss whether a shingles vaccine would be appropriate for me to get now. Shingles is not something you wish loved ones or yourself to experience.

Safeway/Vons pharmacy might have walk in clinics next to their pharmacy which gives shingles vaccination. My local ones do. CVS pharmacy and Walgreens pharmacy probably have similar services.

[Kanin]

I had cp in 6th grade, and I was out for a long time.... maybe 2 weeks? I don't remember a lot of it but the part I do remember is being delirious in my parents' bed and feeling just awful. I don't remember the itching part particularly. The teacher even called to ask when I'd be back because I was out so long. I'll definitely get the shingles vaccine.

[Spy Car]

7 minutes ago, Arcadia said:

Safeway/Vons pharmacy might have walk in clinics next to their pharmacy which gives shingles vaccination. My local ones do. CVS pharmacy and Walgreens pharmacy probably have similar services.

Thank you. It is on my radar to discuss this with my physician once I'm fully vaccinated for Covid.

Shingles is not a joke. I understand that it can strike people more than once. 

Bill

[Not_a_Number]

15 minutes ago, BakersDozen said:

I called our doctor and asked about antiviral but he said only in high-risk patients and at a very certain point/time frame in the cp process. My 16yo is doing fine; 14yo is a bit uncomfortable and has more than her older sister did. So far nothing for my 18yo.

I’m surprised about that. Why do they limit it?

[wathe]

9 minutes ago, Spy Car said:

Thank you. It is on my radar to discuss this with my physician once I'm fully vaccinated for Covid.

Shingles is not a joke. I understand that it can strike people more than once. 

Bill

Yes.  CDC recommends shingles vax even if you've already had shingles, in order to prevent more attacks.

[Spy Car]

1 hour ago, wathe said:

Yes.  CDC recommends shingles vax even if you've already had shingles, in order to prevent more attacks.

I've heard that the shingles vaccine is not that much fun to have, but--take it from me--you do not want to get shingles!!!

I've always prided myself on being a big tough guy with a very high pain threshold. Shingles brought me to my knees.

The amount of nerve pain I endured is hard to describe without sounding hyperbolic. 

Bill

 

 

[BakersDozen]

1 hour ago, Not_a_Number said:

I’m surprised about that. Why do they limit it?

I have no clue. Maybe because she had the vaccination rather than natural exposure at her age? Her case was so incredibly mild, thank goodness!

[itsheresomewhere]

Don’t beat yourself up about it.  
 

DS had the chicken pox shot when he was younger.  He came down with chicken pox along with a lot of kids in my area as apparently there was a bad batch of vaccines.  His was mild in my opinion as I had it internally, on my eye lids, everywhere.