Curfews for young adults

[Pen]

 

1 hour ago, Aura said:

I have a 19yo, sophmore in college. For her, an 11pm "curfew" is unreasonable. Granted, probably a good 5 out of 7 nights she's home by 9:00, but that's only because her current job ends at 8:00. Before that, she wouldn't get home from work until after 11:00. And then there's always the movie/game nights with friends and the long study group nights where everyone is prepping for some major test. 

Fortunately, she also has a great relationship with her boyfriend, and they help keep tabs on each other. They make sure to text each other when they get home to let the other know they got there safely. It helps that they're almost always awake at the same time anyway! It helps me not to worry so much. I wonder, Scarlett, if something like this would help you? If your ds had a friend that they agreed to keep up with, then you could put on some white noise and go to sleep knowing that if your ds doesn't get home, his friend will call/text you that he hasn't heard from him?

 

I have a feeling it might help more if there were a close friend who had a family that didn’t mind late arrivals or frequent guests where Scarlett’s Ds could text her at ~9pm that he’d be spending the night at the Smith’s .  Then the arrival home anticipation would be over for that night.  

[gardenmom5]

50 minutes ago, Katy said:

I saw #5 on this list and had to laugh- https://www.southernliving.com/culture/southern-dad-dating-quotes

 

Dd came up with her own when she was in high school. 

If you can hold an intelligent conversation,  I'll talk to you.

 

[scholastica]

53 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Again, it isn't that I am worried about him.  It is the not knowing when he will be coming home that is the main problem.  The anticipation.  If I had an arrangement where someone was going to call/text me if they didn't hear from him...I would just be in a constant state of 'waiting' for that call/text.  If he says he will be home by 11 I am fine until 11 and then it is waiting, waiting, waiting. No possible way I could sleep. 

I think I get what you are saying. You have no problem with him being gone. You trust him to make good decisions. You also know that when he gets home, because of the construction of the house, there will be inevitable noise that wakes you. There’s no point in trying to sleep until he’s settled in and you’re waiting for him to finish his nightly ablutions so you can all sleep for the night. If he doesn’t get there by the time he’s expected, you’re a little concerned and a little irritated not knowing when he’ll get there so you can finally sleep. Is that close?

 

[cave canem]

1 hour ago, Katy said:

I saw #5 on this list and had to laugh- https://www.southernliving.com/culture/southern-dad-dating-quotes

I thought that "nothing good ever happens after midnight" was wisdom passed down from the ancients.

[Scarlett]

49 minutes ago, scholastica said:

I think I get what you are saying. You have no problem with him being gone. You trust him to make good decisions. You also know that when he gets home, because of the construction of the house, there will be inevitable noise that wakes you. There’s no point in trying to sleep until he’s settled in and you’re waiting for him to finish his nightly ablutions so you can all sleep for the night. If he doesn’t get there by the time he’s expected, you’re a little concerned and a little irritated not knowing when he’ll get there so you can finally sleep. Is that close?

 

Close.  LOL  But there is a slight nuance that is really difficult to explain.  Let's say I am super tired and crash out at 9.  If he is sleeping at a friend's house (rare by the way) I will sleep fine all night.  But if he is suppose to be home at 11 I will wake up at some point in anticipation of him coming in.  15 minutes til', or 15 min after...either way is very unpleasant because if it is 15 til then I can't sleep until he comes in...if it is 15 after I am instantly irritated because he is late and then I begin the task of deciding when to text, or call, and wondering why he hasn't. 

And don't even get me started on how I felt when it was 3 a.m. and I woke up.  It was the weekend, so he was suppose to be home at midnight--both boys were actually together that night.  And I had a text from 2:00 a.m from son's girlfriend's mom asking if I had heard from them.  Grrrr. 

Edited April 4, 2019 by Scarlett

[Katy]

24 minutes ago, cave canem said:

I thought that "nothing good ever happens after midnight" was wisdom passed down from the ancients.

 

I've heard different variations of that.  2am in NYC, and apparently 11 in the South...

[cave canem]

1 minute ago, Katy said:

I've heard different variations of that.  2am in NYC, and apparently 11 in the South...

Midnight is in the middle and has a nice, concise ring to it.

[Scarlett]

22 minutes ago, Katy said:

 

I've heard different variations of that.  2am in NYC, and apparently 11 in the South...

11 in the south but only during the week.  LOL.  On the weekend things happening  between 11 and 12 are acceptable.

[Scarlett]

On 4/3/2019 at 11:40 PM, Garga said:

 

 

 

Scarlett’s son doesn’t like his father.  He doesn’t want to move in with him.  It’s not Scarlett who doesn’t want her son to move in with his father...the son doesn’t want it.  Plus the father is a state away from son’s work and college, so even if son wanted to move in with dad, it wouldn’t work.

I missed this post last week.  And yes you are correct.  It isn’t about what I want....But I don’t want him to go live with his father. I prefer he stay here.  But beyond what I want, ds doesn’t want that.  If he did he would have went last year when he graduated.   And yes, it is several hours away in a different state so it is not an easy switch even if ds wanted to.  

[Scarlett]

On 4/4/2019 at 12:36 AM, StellaM said:

When people share a house together, adult people, they need to be considerate of each other.

Scarlett, I have the same wake issue that you and OkBud describe. 

It's actually way easier for me to sleep when dd is away at uni, and I haven't got a clue where she is.  

My dd's 'curfew' (not really one, just what we kind of worked out) is that 1 is the absolute latest that works for me, and for her. If she's going to be out later than that, she really needs to sleep over at her girlfriend's house or something. It has not been a problem for us - she doesn't feel like I am treating her like a child, she just knows my weird sleep, lol. When dd is home, I would really rather that it wasn't night after night of 1am either. 

I suck up not sleeping properly till 1 for the sake of family harmony, she sucks up coming home by 1 or sleeping over at a friends for the sake of family harmony. It's not a big deal.

I absoutely do not think it is some infringement on adulthood to let your mom know that you're heading out, and approx what time you'll be home, texting if those plans change. I text my young adults if my plans change, for goodness sake. 

It is very true that if one does not want to compromise with one's family for the sake of family harmony, one needs to move out and have an apartment of one's own 🙂 

I do think 11 is on the early side...I'd at least suck up an 'before midnight, fine' thing on weekends, if it was me.

Ignore the people who think you need psychotherapy for having a body that anticipates time! Some people have never seen real problems if they think that is psychologist worthy.

 

 

I missed this one last week as well.  Thank you for your support.  11 is the Sunday through Thursday curfew.  Friday and saturdays and holidays is midnight.  And neither is hard and fast as long as we have some conversation and consideration. 

When your dd comes in at 1.....what time are you getting p the next morning?  We get up at 6:30 or 6 here.  

 

[Scarlett]

On 4/2/2019 at 9:19 PM, Catwoman said:

 

What I meant was that the details don’t matter. I remember back when you were so scared that you’re now-ex-dh was cheating on you. I was really worried about you. It didn’t matter that our lifestyles were different. And when you were so nice back when my dh was sick, things like money never mattered then, either. 

I’m not sure where we went wrong. It would be nice to start over. I don’t like fighting with you. It seems so petty and stupid. (I mean the arguing seems petty and stupid — not that you are!)

Cat, I would like to apologize for my harshness with you last week.  Whether you can relate to my life or not it was unkind of me to lash out at you.  

[Catwoman]

52 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Cat, I would like to apologize for my harshness with you last week.  Whether you can relate to my life or not it was unkind of me to lash out at you.  

 

I’m all in favor of forgetting any of it ever happened and starting fresh. 🙂

Hopefully, we can go forward with the assumption that even though we may lead very different lives, we both mean well and have good intentions.

I hope that’s okay with you. 

[Pen]

52 minutes ago, StellaM said:

 

The days I have to get up at 6 I ask her not to come home late.

Fri/Sat I can sleep till 7.30. I do OK with dozing till 1, then a proper sleep for 6 hours.

 

I think part of my reaction to this issue and this thread is based on reading about research that shows that many people in modern civilization (USA, Canada, Australia, England, France...  ) do not get adequate sleep either in amount, quality, nor consistency ...  and even if they think they are alert and sharp after inadequate sleep they are not.  With consequences for health and safety affecting others too similar to alcohol impairment affecting others, not just the drunk person.  

I think 6 hours is no longer considered “proper” .  

 

[Pen]

59 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Cat, I would like to apologize for my harshness with you last week.  Whether you can relate to my life or not it was unkind of me to lash out at you.  

 

Just now, Catwoman said:

 

I’m all in favor of forgetting any of it ever happened and starting fresh. 🙂

Hopefully, we can go forward with the assumption that even though we may lead very different lives, we both mean well and have good intentions.

I hope that’s okay with you. 

 

Thank you both.  These posts were uplifting to me. 

[Scarlett]

It is  not enough.  And although I can function on that I don’t do well.  I need at least 7 on a regular basis.  My kid does too of course,  but he is in the state of life where he think he knows more than  I do.  So I let that go.  

[Pen]

6 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

It is  not enough.  And although I can function on that I don’t do well.  I need at least 7 on a regular basis.  My kid does too of course,  but he is in the state of life where he think he knows more than  I do.  So I let that go.  

 

https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about_sleep/how_much_sleep.html

agrees with you about 7 minimum

and from what I have read going under that and then trying to make it up on weekends or whenever is inadequate 

[KidsHappen]

Well as many of you know I don't usually sleep at night but my hubby and I have also reached the age of afternoon naps. I highly recommend them if you can manage them. 

[Murphy101]

I never do curfews.  They are expected to show consideration by letting us know when to expect them in (aka when to start worrying if we don’t hear from them) and to respect that my house is mostly silent after 10pm because of bedtime and next day schedules. 

But on any given night I have 1-6 people coming and going at all hours of the night due to work schedules or whatever. 

And the only time anyone seems to want a heart to heart with mama is at 1am, so a text or call or soft knock on the bedroom door isn’t unusual, at least several times a month but not nightly. 

If they are good kids making good choices and generally being considerate - I don’t get the angst.  I’m glad my home is a haven and our lives are both expanding and staying entwined. I’ll sleep when I’m dead. 

[Murphy101]

On 4/2/2019 at 8:44 PM, Scarlett said:

In your world probably.  Not mine.  

 

But it isn’t just your world. It’s your sons world and it seems it isn’t accurate in their world either. So if you want to share in their world, there needs to be some flexibility on your part. 

On 4/2/2019 at 9:31 PM, Katy said:

 

COL in Oklahoma is very low.  So low it might be cheaper to subsidize his own apartment than it would to pay for prescription sleep medication and the appointments needed to stay on it.

 

It’s low but it’s still frikken nuts. My son lives in a small 2bdrm apartment with a roommate and his half of the monthly rent is still more than the mortgage on our first home but his wage is only a few dollars more than the job my dh had when we first got married.  I’m happy that he is being a great guy on his own, but I hate that doing so means he will be one paycheck from having to move back home and I don’t see it as likely that he will be able to have any substantial savings to cushion the crap that happens in life.  Same for another son who is renting what he half jokes is a former crack house with 4 other guys.

I’d rather they pay a pittance to live here and it’s winner winner financial break for all parties.  But of course I understand why they want to branch out to their own abodes and have no issue with it beyond being boggled as to how they can afford it.  

Edited April 8, 2019 by Murphy101

[Tree Frog]

I saw this article on BBC and thought of this thread. 
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/stories-47832426

[Murphy101]

47 minutes ago, wilrunner said:

I saw this article on BBC and thought of this thread. 
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/stories-47832426

 

That boy of a man is an entitled donkey butt. 

I have no issues with that nonsense thank goodness. 

I have young men who aren’t my own children living here and I have none of those issues.

What the bleep?  The mom and dad know the answer.  Sit him down and lay it out. I don’t really care if his friends have more money.  If he thinks he can better bum off them, then maybe he should give that a try before giving me crap in my house that we’ve sweat to maintain and keep every month.  If the only help he wants is for me to be his doormat, then he’s going to have to seek “help” elsewhere. The constantly changing rent is wrong.  Either they agree to a fair portion or they don’t and he goes elsewhere.  But paying a pittance in rent doesn’t mean he gets free range to everything without consideration either.  Even roommates don’t do that to each other.

The food thing is weird. I don’t much care what they eat as long as it’s not wasted.  I buy food to be eaten. But Wow do I lose my mind over food waste. I’ll get all screaming and draconian when I see food wasted in the trash or sink or laying on the counter.  I have been known to remove all bowls except the smallest dessert bowls for wasting cereal. Seriously. If you are going to pour a salad bowl of cereal you darn well better eat and drink every bit of it because I’m going to lose it when I find half of it in the sink. And I don’t allow food in bedrooms. For anyone. Just. Nope. That’s the worst it’s ever gotten. (Obviously I still have strong emotions about food waste! Lol)

But no one in my house seems to mind terribly?  If they want more food, they buy it themselves. If they want a particular food, they buy that too. If they see waste their like damn yeah moms right and they stop. 

This morning one of them went and bought donuts for everyone. That’s quite the splurge IMO and he doesn’t do it much so we all appreciated that and thanked him. (He felt bad bc he forgot I can’t eat them, but that’s alright. I still appreciated it!)

idk. I don’t think I’m a particularly good mom and I sure don’t have lots of money to waste either. The vast majority of my parenting is simple practicalities and efficiency.   But there’s something wrong in this story beyond adult kids living with their parents. What she describes was not an issue even for my teens and middle schoolers. I’ve often had to explain points of finance or consideration that they didn’t have the experience to grasp intuitively yet, (especially my spectrum kids!) but it wasn’t because they just thought such concepts didn’t apply to them or that somehow contributing as adults demeans parental respect.  I’m not their landlord no matter how much they help. They aren’t 10 yr old no matter how much they don’t help. That’s a false dichotomy we never bought in to.  And we for sure have dealt with friends who have lots more money than us and how to be friends regardless of finances and how to manage envy. 

But there’s something I’m not getting as to what brought their relationship to this point. When did he start thinking his parents owe him anything much less the same standard as his wealthier friends? 

Edited April 8, 2019 by Murphy101

[Wheres Toto]

5 hours ago, wilrunner said:

I saw this article on BC and thought of this thread. 
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/stories-47832426

Seems like the kid and the parents both have issues there.   They need to sit down and set up some rules around rent, food, chores, etc.   I found it odd how little opinion the dad seemed to have.

The mom seems afraid to set rules, and I've never even thought about my kids opinions of my social life.  I'm quite happy being in my pjs watching tv or reading by 8pm.  She sounded jealous of her kids social life and desperate for her kids approval.  Weird.

[2_girls_mommy]

I haven't read all of these yet, but had one thought when I read the OP. Colleges have curfews for young adults in the dorms for safety and considerations. I wouldn't have a problem with having a curfew for young adults living in my home. I wouldn't have a problem with setting limits for old adults living in my home …. say if we had family members who needed to stay with us for some reason. I would have expectations that there couldn't be parties, couldn't be drugs, couldn't be noise after a reasonable time, etc. If there was a problem with any of that it would need to be addressed. 

My kids aren't there yet, but we are close. So far my kids fall into the not a problem with any of this category. I would assume things won't change a bunch, that they will always tell us where they are and when they expect to be home, BUT mine aren't driving on their own yet, so things may change, lol.  But I see nothing wrong with curfews just like a dorm does. 

[Joker]

I've never heard of curfews at college dorms. Ds is a freshman living in a dorm this year and has no curfew (doesn't have one at home either). They do have quiet hours but that doesn't include normal coming and going noise.

[Terabith]

I graduated from college 20 years ago, and there was definitely no curfew when I was attending.  I think it's been a LONG time since most colleges had curfews.  I could see super conservative ones like Bob Jones maybe having them.  But it's NOT a normal or standard thing.

[Katy]

4 minutes ago, Terabith said:

I graduated from college 20 years ago, and there was definitely no curfew when I was attending.  I think it's been a LONG time since most colleges had curfews.  I could see super conservative ones like Bob Jones maybe having them.  But it's NOT a normal or standard thing.

 

Schools that admit underage kids as freshman frequently have them in a separate dorm and they have curfews.  Religious schools often do too.

[Terabith]

I could see a curfew at a school that has a number of underage students.  Mary Baldwin's PEG program, for instance.  But for run of the mill, 18 and up college students?  I don't think so, except possibly very conservative schools.  I looked at a number of religious colleges (and attended a religious, although fairly nominally religious, college, but none were super conservative).  

[regentrude]

2 hours ago, 2_girls_mommy said:

Colleges have curfews for young adults in the dorms for safety and considerations.

Huh? None of my kids' colleges do, nor does the one where I work. Would not be feasible, since students are out late studying and working. How do you have curfews for adults working the night shift at the ER? 

The dorm residency requirement is bad enough; a curfew would be ludicrous.

Edited April 9, 2019 by regentrude

[Pen]

3 hours ago, 2_girls_mommy said:

I haven't read all of these yet, but had one thought when I read the OP. Colleges have curfews for young adults in the dorms for safety and considerations.

 

 

Most don’t.

Perhaps some religious ones or military do.  Some coaches expect athletes to get to bed by a certain time. Some schools have a special quiet dorm.  But it’s not the norm for dorms.

 

ETA: Quiet though and an emphasis on sleeping and studying being rights that supersede making noise and partying though, has become more a thing as campus noise became a serious problem in many places.  

Our state flagship U has Sunday to Thursday quiet times from 11pm to 10 am, for example.   But it isn’t a curfew as in olden days of the university gates being locked and students having to scale walls if they arrived back late.  

Edited April 9, 2019 by Pen

[EmseB]

No one I knew in college when I went into the military had a curfew. I knew because they thought my curfew was draconian. They often spent the night at friends' apartments, or went home for the weekend. Not so much for me, until I had been in for four or six months or something.

I thought the idea of young ladies having curfews in their single-sex dorms was a thing of the '50s and '60s?

[Loowit]

My dorm at university did not have a curfew.  People came and went at all hours.

The Bible college I attended had one.  I think it was like midnight for weeknights and 1 am for weekends.  They locked the doors at curfew and if we came in late we had to call campus security to get let in and they would turn our name into the school for punishment (work for the college for a set number of hours).  If someone had a job that required them to be out late they would get permission from their dean.

[Pen]

15 minutes ago, EmseB said:

No one I knew in college when I went into the military had a curfew. I knew because they thought my curfew was draconian. They often spent the night at friends' apartments, or went home for the weekend. Not so much for me, until I had been in for four or six months or something.

I thought the idea of young ladies having curfews in their single-sex dorms was a thing of the '50s and '60s?

 

I think curfew is  11:30 pm at West Point.  Currently.   Perhaps similar at other military academy universities.  

My view of the 60’s is of marches and sit ins 😉 

[Pen]

Example university Quiet hours:

“To preserve academic and community standards, noise levels must be held to a minimum at all times and students will be expected to adhere to campus quiet hours. Quiet hours shall be maintained between the hours of 10:00 p.m. to 8:00 a.m., Sundaythrough Thursday and 12 midnight to 10:00 a.m., Friday and Saturday.Apr 17, 2018

Housing Policies - UCSC Housing - UC Santa ...

 

 

 

 

[2_girls_mommy]

Guess I'm fashioned and agree with religious colleges! I didn't realize it was that uncommon! I still see no problems expecting my own kids to be courteous and home at decent hours if living at home as young adults, I think.  🙂 like I said not there yet! 

[Shoeless]

My college did not have a curfew.  The doors were locked at midnight and there was an overnight person who monitored the door and let in residents who showed id.  Anyone who didn't live in the dorm could enter after midnight if a resident signed them in.  This was one of my jobs in college, the overnight dorm guard.  

[Bootsie]

I just finished teaching my college class that ends at 9:15pm.  I was talking to a student who was on her way to a 10:00 meeting.  Our library is open 24 hours per day during the week; the rec center is open until midnight.  Our campus Chick-fi-la is open until 2:00am.   We have some classes that go to 10:00pm (perhaps later) and final exam schedules are such that some final exams do not end to 10:30pm.  I have been in the classroom giving an exam to a student with extended time until midnight before.  

[SKL]

My university didn't have a curfew.

But if they had, I would assume it was for safety reasons as the campus was in a high-crime area.  I can imagine it would be difficult to ensure safety all night long if people were randomly putzing around the campus.  But most people in my experience have enough sense to be inside when it isn't safe to be outside.

I do recall being told off for playing the dorm piano too late.  I had assumed the sound was muffled by the ceiling / floor.  I didn't need to be told twice though.

[Bootsie]

30 minutes ago, StellaM said:

Exams that don't end till 10.30 pm ???!!!

That's beyond my ken. 

 

I just checked the previous school where I taught--they have final exams that go as late as 11:15pm, which is especially tough when you also have an exam scheduled at the first time slot the next morning--which is as early as 7:00am!

[cjzimmer1]

52 minutes ago, StellaM said:

 

Oh my, that is very sad for students.

I absolutely could not complete an exam to the best of my ability going on for 11pm!

Why so late ? Are there not adequate rooms to timetable everything at a decent hour ?

My college didn't go that late but I would have gladly taken that over 7,8 or even 9 AM tests any day.  In college I much preferred if the day didn't start till noon or later.  10:00 PM-1:00 AM was/is my most productive period of the day.  I would happily have taken exams then too if it were an option.  

But I'm a night owl and always have been and realistically always will be.  But I'm sure as much as I hated all those pre-lunch classes, there are just as many morning people who hated the after supper classes that were my favorite.

[Tanaqui]

1 hour ago, StellaM said:

 

Oh my, that is very sad for students.

I absolutely could not complete an exam to the best of my ability going on for 11pm!

Why so late ? Are there not adequate rooms to timetable everything at a decent hour ?

 

11pm is a much more decent hour for taking a test than 9am. What sort of monster expects people to be awake and alert at that hour!?

[Shoeless]

2 hours ago, StellaM said:

 

Oh my, that is very sad for students.

I absolutely could not complete an exam to the best of my ability going on for 11pm!

Why so late ? Are there not adequate rooms to timetable everything at a decent hour ?

 

Some schools offer night classes for people that work during the day.  I don't think I ever took a final that went until 11 pm, but I took some that ended at 10 pm.  

I'd much prefer an exam ending at 10 pm than one starting at 8 am!

[QueenCat]

12 hours ago, 2_girls_mommy said:

I haven't read all of these yet, but had one thought when I read the OP. Colleges have curfews for young adults in the dorms for safety and considerations.

1

 

Interesting... I didn't have a curfew in my dorm some 30+ years ago. I don't think that's a common thing today. Maybe at private religious schools...

[Bootsie]

9 hours ago, StellaM said:

 

Oh my, that is very sad for students.

I absolutely could not complete an exam to the best of my ability going on for 11pm!

Why so late ? Are there not adequate rooms to timetable everything at a decent hour ?

Many college students do not see 9 or 10 am as a decent hour for a test--and they do not view 10pm as not at a decent hour.

One reason for the late night/early morning classes and exams is the lack of classroom space.  However, there are a number of time slots of classes that are designed to meet the needs of students from different backgrounds.  Some students want a class right after work at 5:30pm.  Other students want to go home,, have dinner with their kids, get their kids in bed, and then go take a class   Each of those time periods in which classes are scheduled must have its own unique final exam time.  To get all of those times into a one-week final exam week, early morning and late night times ust be used to gave enough final exam time slots.  

 

[hippiemamato3]

I've never heard of a curfew for college student in dorms. I wonder if this is at very conservative or religious schools.

[freesia]

My ds is at a Christian college and they don't have curfews.  We toured quite a few others and they didn't either.  I think it is extremely rare.

[Catwoman]

I had no idea that any college had curfews for students! 

It’s interesting that on one hand, I often hear people talk about how parents are infantilizing their 18yo adult children if they let them live at home or want to know where they are going or when they will be home... but there are others who think it’s perfectly fine for a 21yo college student to have to abide by a curfew. 

I started college back in 1980, and I never knew anyone who had a curfew, whether they were living on campus or at home. 

This thread has been eye-opening for me!

[Pen]

8 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

I had no idea that any college had curfews for students! 

It’s interesting that on one hand, I often hear people talk about how parents are infantilizing their 18yo adult children if they let them live at home or want to know where they are going or when they will be home... but there are others who think it’s perfectly fine for a 21yo college student to have to abide by a curfew. 

I started college back in 1980, and I never knew anyone who had a curfew, whether they were living on campus or at home. 

This thread has been eye-opening for me!

 

 

https://www.forbes.com/2009/08/02/colleges-university-ratings-opinions-colleges-09-intro.html

 

“America's Best Colleges 2009

 

The best college in America has an 11:30 p.m. curfew.”

 

About West Point.  And generally seems to be part of an expectation of mature behavior befitting an officer , not infantilization.  As I read it.  You may see it differently.  

Edited April 9, 2019 by Pen

[Catwoman]

4 minutes ago, Pen said:

 

 

https://www.forbes.com/2009/08/02/colleges-university-ratings-opinions-colleges-09-intro.html

 

“America's Best Colleges 2009

 

The best college in America has an 11:30 p.m. curfew.”

 

About West Point.  And generally seems to be part of an expectation of mature behavior befitting an officer , not infantilization.  As I read it.  You may see it differently.  

 

West Point isn’t an average American college. And it’s only one of what appears to be a very small percentage of colleges that impose any kind of curfew on students. I’m not sure what point you’re trying to make here.

And honestly, if West Point has the expectation that students will exhibit “mature behavior befitting an officer,” why would those future officers need a curfew? 😉

[Pen]

I think my university which had neither curfew nor quiet hours was unhealthy, and if I knew then what I know now about the importance of sleep, I would not have gone there.

 I would not encourage my son toward a curfew college as neither military nor religious would be a good fit for him.

But quiet hours would be of importance to me.

Edited April 9, 2019 by Pen

[Pen]

3 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

 

West Point isn’t an average American college. And it’s only one of what appears to be a very small percentage of colleges that impose any kind of curfew on students. I’m not sure what point you’re trying to make here.

And honestly, if West Point has the expectation that students will exhibit “mature behavior befitting an officer,” why would those future officers need a curfew? 😉

 

I don’t think you could have read the article in time it took from my post to your reply.  If you read it and still don’t understand, I’ll try to explain.