Would you/do let your 12yo dd wear makeup?

[Sue G in PA]

My dd is turning 12 on Saturday. She's been asking recently to be allowed to wear a little makeup...clear/light colored lip glosses mainly. I was wondering what the Hive thought about make-up for a 12yo. She is still so "young" in so many ways and certainly no interested in boys at all (that I can tell). I just don't want her to grow up too fast and yet I don't want to keep her a little girl forever either, KWIM? I'm asking this question b/c I'm putting together a little "beauty basket" for her for Christmas and was curious what to include. I have some nail polishes and nail gems (she love nail polish), some very light color or clear lip glosses and I'm wondering what else to include? Light colored eye shadow? Too much? Perhaps a new hair brush, some girly body washes, etc.? Any suggestions? Thanks.

[Remudamom]

My 14 and almost 16 yr olds don't wear it. And aren't interested in wearing it, haven't asked. Must be my dds.

 

BTW, no, I wouldn't even consider letting a 12 yr old wear anything. Little girls wearing makeup look trashy. Lip gloss turns into neon blue eyeshadow quickly.

Edited November 20, 2008 by Remudamom

[HRAAB]

I would put in non-colored lip gloss, light shades of finger nail polish, bath oils, body wash, face scrubs, lotion... No eye shadow, mascara. I just think 12 is too young for make up, imo.

 

Janet

[TammyinTN]

No way....no how! My girls didn't get any makeup until 16.

[sassenach]

I think I'd be ok with the lip gloss, mascara and compact powder. Anything more would be too much.

[SonshineLearner]

I got to do foundation and concealer type make-up at 12 (now they have moisturizer and concealer in one) and blush (think "bronzer") Just enough to make it look like a was sun kissed. I then was able to add one other "make-up" item each birthday. Next came eye shadow and then mascara and some where in there was lip gloss. I always was suppose to look "fresh" and not like a made up woman. Some of this would depend on your daughter and if she has acne.

I say, when you start make-up, you have to be even more careful about cleaning, learn skin care, etc....It's part of growing up...but slowly:-)

My 16 yr old could care less about make-up, my 13 yr old wears what I've allowed, and my 10 yr old tries to sneak it:-)

Carrie:-)

[Pink Fairy]

Honestly, I don't think makeup is a good idea for a 12yo. It's bad for their skin, and they are so beautiful just the way they are. Nevertheless, I like all of your ideas for the beauty basket, except the eye shadow. What a great way to meet your daughter's need to be "grown up," and still keep it age appropriate. Good job, Mom!

[Michelle T]

I was around 13 at the time. She was quite insistent that I would look prettier with foundation and blush. I don't remember if there was eyeshadow or lipstick.

 

Anyway, my mom is weird. She still frequently comments on my makeup, always telling me I'm not wearing dark enough lipstick!

 

If I had a 12 yo DD, I'd let her wear sheer gloss, but that would be about it.

Michelle T

[Rose in BC]

Her biological make up is half First Nations so she has beautiful coloured skin which will mean she most likely won't need make up for many more years to come. She also has extremely dry and sensitive skin so I'm happy to hold off with any products that might irritate her skin.

 

I'd hold off as long as possible. I think if my daughter asked to wear make up I'd be okay with lip gloss to start.

 

I, on the other hand, have very pale skin and wore make up quite young because I always looked pasty. So I don't know if my opinion would change if her skin was different.

[BMW]

I agree with the no make up at that age. At 14 my daughters were allowed modest, simple make up and learned how to put it on and look lovely, if they want to do that. I am not a primper - have way to much to do and don't want to miss out of life because I'm in front of a mirror. My 16yog is the same way. She just got a job in child care at an athletic club and everyone there is older than her (employees) and they are all primped up (in a very nice, lovely way). So, now this girl will put on some mascara and lip gloss, that's it. My 14yog, however, loves to fix her hair and put on mascara and a touch of eye shadow (modestly) and that's just her. I knew she'd be this way... when she was 6 she would walk through a dept. store and comment, "Oh, this bag would look great with those shoes." And I'd think, "Where is she getting this??" (not from me, her sisters or a tv, we didn't have a tv!)

 

Anyway, for us, I just loved doing this together at 14 yrs. At 12, I 2nd sticking with a clear lip something or other (like a burt's bees) and bath stuff, extra make up just seems too much.

[3lilreds in NC]

I think 12 is OK for soft lip glosses. I remember being allowed to wear some makeup at that at that age, because I had some silver, gold and bronze shadow and I wanted to wear too much of it. :)

 

IMO, lip gloss is fine. You could also include some subtle eye shadow. I'm thinking of something like MK's Eyesicles. The Vanilla is a lovely, soft, subtle color. You don't use much of it and it would add a little shimmer to her eyes, just right for that age. Other companies make similar products (it's a cream-to-powder eyeshadow in a tube) and that could work well. Of course there are all kinds of powder eyeshadows that you put on with a brush.

 

I think body wash and maybe some (sparkly?) lotion, if you think she'd use it, would be great. I know my girls love that stuff and my nieces did at your dd's age too (mine are a little younger). You mentioned a new hair brush - does she like pretty hair clips and such too? Maybe something like that?

 

I just went back and read the other responses - I'm clearly in the minority on the eye shadow! :D You don't have to let it be neon blue, though. If you think it's too much, I know she'd be delighted with the lip gloss with the other things you're planning to put in the basket.

[AnnetteB]

Only something like Burt's Bees lipgloss if they actually had chapped lips. No nail polish or removers partially in deference to my asthma and out of concerns for carcinogens. I love a clean-scrubbed natural face and brushed hair :)

[Murphy101]

My dd is turning 12 on Saturday. She's been asking recently to be allowed to wear a little makeup...clear/light colored lip glosses mainly.

 

Honestly, I don't think makeup is a good idea for a 12yo. It's bad for their skin, and they are so beautiful just the way they are.

 

I wouldn't have any problem with some lipstick/gloss at that age.

 

My #1 concern is that make-up really is horrible for our skin. Personally, I just can't wear it without it aggrevating my skin in some way. I only wear it when I seriously need to either cover some skin issue or it's one big night out king of thing.

 

BUT, many 12 year old girls do NOT have beautiful complections at that age. I personally had horrible acne at that age and learning how to PROPERLY apply makeup really bolstered my self-esteam.

 

So if her complection isn't bothering her, you might tell her that makeup can really cause skin issues.

 

If she still wants makeup, I'd be fine with lip stuff, nail polish, maybe light blush. None of the other stuff unless I felt she needed the self-esteem boost more than to wait.

[rafiki]

.

[newbie]

My 14 and almost 16 yr olds don't wear it. And aren't interested in wearing it, haven't asked. Must be my dds.

 

BTW, no, I wouldn't even consider letting a 12 yr old wear anything. Little girls wearing makeup look trashy. Lip gloss turns into neon blue eyeshadow quickly.

 

:iagree:I think body and hair care are great , but not makeup. American Girl and Bath and Body works have cute lil kits for girls. They have plenty of time to wear makeup when they are older.

[Tracey in TX]

My girls are allowed to wear lip gloss and have since they were about 7y/o. It's the only way they'll keep their lips moist to avoid chapped lips.

 

DD, 11, sometimes wears a bit of mascara. She's dark complected with short eyelashes, so it looks much better. There won't be any more make-up allowed for a long time, though. Many of her peers already wear more make-up than me.

[frogpond1]

She doesn't look cheap or trashy. She wears little dangle earrings and she looks quite darling.

[KidsHappen]

Yes, rite of passage. My dd gets to wear blush, mascara and lip gloss. We made a special trip to the store for make-up, feminine supplies and a special personal holder to carry them in her purse, and finally an electric razor. She also got her first cell phone for her birthday. She is officially a (almost) teen now.

 

P.S. She also got Webkinz so I guess she not quite all grown up yet. :)

[jamnkats]

My dd is turning 12 on Saturday. She's been asking recently to be allowed to wear a little makeup...clear/light colored lip glosses mainly. I was wondering what the Hive thought about make-up for a 12yo. She is still so "young" in so many ways and certainly no interested in boys at all (that I can tell). I just don't want her to grow up too fast and yet I don't want to keep her a little girl forever either, KWIM? I'm asking this question b/c I'm putting together a little "beauty basket" for her for Christmas and was curious what to include. I have some nail polishes and nail gems (she love nail polish), some very light color or clear lip glosses and I'm wondering what else to include? Light colored eye shadow? Too much? Perhaps a new hair brush, some girly body washes, etc.? Any suggestions? Thanks.

 

My 7yo wears nail polish frequently, eyeshadow occasionally and lipstick very occasionally, so my answer would be sure.

[TCoppock]

Although I only have a son, I think if I did have a daughter I would allow her to wear clear or a shear colored lip gloss. Burts Bee has some very nice lip products that add just a slight hint of color to your lips.

[pqr]

No....no....no....never!!!!

 

12 year olds are still little girls. Playing dress up is one thing, but makeup.....well over her father's dead body.

[Tammyla]

Sue,

I really believe each family knows best. When my dd turned 13, we went to the Clinique counter and had the rep show her how and what to wear... as per my limits. She ended up with a good facial soap, moisturizer, a very pale lip conditioner/shine and a peachy eye shadow that she only wears with permission. I thought she needed to learn how to care for her skin and how to apply it without looking made up. We had a nice day and she got the less is more message.:001_smile:

 

My dd is turning 12 on Saturday. She's been asking recently to be allowed to wear a little makeup...clear/light colored lip glosses mainly. I was wondering what the Hive thought about make-up for a 12yo. She is still so "young" in so many ways and certainly no interested in boys at all (that I can tell). I just don't want her to grow up too fast and yet I don't want to keep her a little girl forever either, KWIM? I'm asking this question b/c I'm putting together a little "beauty basket" for her for Christmas and was curious what to include. I have some nail polishes and nail gems (she love nail polish), some very light color or clear lip glosses and I'm wondering what else to include? Light colored eye shadow? Too much? Perhaps a new hair brush, some girly body washes, etc.? Any suggestions? Thanks.

[Ellie]

Mom of two dds here, neither of whom wore makeup of any kind until they were 13 or 14.

[Tabrett]

My dd loved the lip glosses that were flavored like Dr Pepper or Reese's PB Cup, ect.... They come in cute containers and look like they have color but are basically clear. She also liked shimmery hand lotion, bath salts and bath fizzies. A good quality concealer would be nice just in case she gets a blemish. Bare Minerals sell a product called Clear Radiance. It is a face powder with a soft glimmer or sheen. It it also come in several translucent colors. It would be nice for a dd of 12. I let would have let my dd wear the above at 12. She was allowed to wear make-up at 13. The "newness" of make-up didn't last very long.:lol: At 14, she wears it about half the time.

Products from Bath and Body Works would be nice for her basket. Also, a scented candle. All these things would give her the feeling of a "spa".

Oh, No blue eyeshadow is allowed.:D

How about taking her to get a French manicure? Very tasteful for a 12 year old.

 

P.S. I don't consider lip gloss "make-up" I would let my 5 yo wear lip gloss.

Edited November 20, 2008 by Tabrett

[happyWImom]

I understand your delemma. My dd is only 6, and likes lip gloss & nail polish! I never let her wear colored lip gloss, obviously, and I only let her use polish on her toes, in the summer, but still.. The problem is, I wear makeup (not a lot;)) and she sees it, so I guess it's natural.

 

At 12, I would still only allow the clear gloss, and nail polish. The scented bath stuff is nice, too.

 

My dd was asking me the other day if she could have some bronzer (she didn't know what it was called-just saw it) like I do. I said no, and why would she ask. She said her friend from dance class had some. I said "Oh, you saw it at the receital, it must have been her mom's" She said it wasn't, the girl told her it was her own! Even for play, I don't want to start encouraging that.

[Colleen]

nt

[Jenny in Atl]

Only for her plays. Having to put on makeup for performances has killed any side interest in using makeup on a daily basis. :lol:

[Parrothead]

Dd has had lip gloss around since she was 3. Since I like being a girly girl at times, we have nail polish, lip gloss, bubble bath, a variety of home spa items. I think that kind of stuff is okay for a 12-year old.

 

I woudn't okay other make up until at least 14.

[missplacedalaskan]

Nope! 16 is the age for beautification products around here!

[camibami]

Only for her plays. Having to put on makeup for performances has killed any side interest in using makeup on a daily basis. :lol:

 

 

Us too!

My oldest wore make-up *once*, at age 7, for a stage play. She HATED it, and has refused to ever, ever, ever put it on again.

 

My youngest does rhythmic gymnastics, and stage makeup is a staple. She wore it last year, was all excited, but this year has decided she doesn't want to. Thats going to go over like a lead balloon with the coach, but I am not going to put it on her if she doesn't want it.

 

Both of them *had* to wear it, and now *hate* it.I think we're safe from make-up for a looonnnggg while.

 

I'd let them wear light eyeshadow, lip gloss, maybe powder or concealer iof they had yucky skin, at 12. No eyeliner or mascara yet though.

[LizzyBee]

I wear little to no make up myself, but I've always let my kids wear a little make up if they want because it takes the mystery out of it. Even when they were toddlers, if they wanted a little blush when they saw me putting it on, I let them. Because they're allowed to wear it, they rarely want to. I also tell them that if their make up is obvious, they're wearing too much - the point is to enhance your looks while looking completely natural. If they wanted to wear heavy make up on a daily basis, I would not allow that. But lip gloss on a 12 yo is perfectly acceptable imo. In fact, I'm constantly trying to get my 12 yo to put something, anything on her lips because they're constantly chapped and swollen.

[Carrie12345]

My 5 and 6yos wear lip gloss and nail polish one in a while. If anyone were to look at my dds and think "trashy," I'd know the problem wasn't with my girls!

 

There's make up, and then there's MAKE UP. I wouldn't suggest black lipstick, but I can't see the harm in clear/light gloss. I wouldn't suggest fake eyelashes, but can't see the harm in clear/light mascara.

 

Like many others said, foundations, blushes, shadows etc. would depend on complexion and, imo, the child.

[PinkInTheBlue]

Well, I'm girlless here but I would let a 12yr old girl wear clean/lightly colored lip gloss. However, that is all I'd let her wear. :)

 

That's just me.

[momofkhm]

but only at home until age 13. Then I go get them a few things - base and blush I think. I do let them wear colored lip gloss at 12, actually earlier since my 11 yo wears it and has worn it out an about for a year or so!

 

But they've been hearing since they were small that make-up is to enhance your look. No one should look at you and say "your make-up looks good today." They should look at you and say "You look nice, different today but I can't put my finger on it."

[Sue G in PA]

Maybe I should have clarified...I didn't mean foundations, eye liners, mascara (she hates it anyway after the ordeal we had for her dance recital), blush. The eye shadow I have (from one of my coupon deals at CVS :D) is very, very light colors like vanilla, pink and a tanish color (barely noticeable). She is a beautiful girl w/out makeup. When I was in 8th grade, my mother gave me permission to wear makeup...whatever I wanted...w/out any sort of "tutorial" on how to wear it "correctly". The end result? Do we have a clown smiley? Yep, I ended up wearing neon blue mascara, blue eye liner, blue eye shadow, dark pink blush and lipstick. Blech.. I shudder to even think of it. My mother never said a word about how horrible I looked. Probably b/c she was never very conscious of what colors went well together or w/ what type of skin/hair. So, picture this pale skinned, freckled, red-head wearing all those colors. :lol: Are you laughing yet? Anyway, I vowed that if I had a little girl, I'd teach her how to apply and wear make-up appropriately b/c I never learned until I was married and in my 20s...at least the neon blue phase died out after the 80s. :lol:

 

Anyway, thanks for the opinions. I think I'm going w/ the pale lip glosses, nail polishes and accessories and some of the body washes. I'm not sure on the eye shadow yet.

[Part-Time Homeschooler]

I work as a makeup artist and you'd be surprised how many mothers bring in their pre-teen daughters for a makeover! I am always hesitant but I can't really say no because I work for a major cosmetics company and travel to major dept. stores. These women want a full-blown makeover for their daughers. I always apply the makeup very minimally but both the mothers and the daughters always ask for more. What I always end up doing is putting on a light dusting of face powder, very light pink (practically clear) lip gloss, a light dusting of a very natural-looking blush, and the lightest, most neutral eye shadow. I can't tell you how many times I've finished a makeover only to hear, "I can't even tell you put anything on her, it's so light!" My response is, "That's how makeup should look. You don't want to see it; you want it to enhance your features, not make them stand out."

[Starr]

:iagree: I'd go with the lip gloss and pretties and wait for the other make up. This is a good time to start talking about the "less is more" advice above. :) You don't need everything at 12 but some girls just think it's fun.

[Starr]

Also, I found that teaching my dd how to wear make up came up during recitals, concerts or theater. If she's on stage she can wear a little and it looks nice to the audience.

[Julieofsardis]

But, I'm actually shocked that I'm in the minority here. My dd is 13 and wears full make-up. She has worn whatever she wanted since she was around 8. She started out with just the light gloss, but has progressed slowly to everything. She does a really good job with her make-up and it really enhances her look.

 

Now, granted I did have to tone her down a couple of weeks ago, because she was wearing dark eye liner all the way around her eyes. We did have the discussion about it looking trashy. So, I made her tone it down. I told her that if she continued with that much, that I would take it away altogether.

 

Anyway, overall she does a really good job with her make-up and it usually looks great. We are a fairly conservative Christian family and it is a non-issue for me.

 

Julie

[tibbyl]

My dd is turning 12 on Saturday. She's been asking recently to be allowed to wear a little makeup...clear/light colored lip glosses mainly. I was wondering what the Hive thought about make-up for a 12yo. She is still so "young" in so many ways and certainly no interested in boys at all (that I can tell). I just don't want her to grow up too fast and yet I don't want to keep her a little girl forever either, KWIM? I'm asking this question b/c I'm putting together a little "beauty basket" for her for Christmas and was curious what to include. I have some nail polishes and nail gems (she love nail polish), some very light color or clear lip glosses and I'm wondering what else to include? Light colored eye shadow? Too much? Perhaps a new hair brush, some girly body washes, etc.? Any suggestions? Thanks.

 

All those items sound reasonable to include in basket. Lightly scented bodysprays and body glitter would be good ideas too. Wearing lip gloss is actually good because it prevents chapped lips. My youngest also like those stickers/tattoos for fingernails at that age.

 

Wearing lip gloss and light eye shadow will not cause puberty to arrive any sooner than it would otherwise.

 

Correction: I had stated that she was around 12 when developed interest in those items. I've been reminded that that was incorrect. She used nail polish considerably earlier. Also, she had some pale eye shadows. Whole family recalls this because she developed expertise at applying the shadows under eyes to give herself the appearance of a sick person. Additionally, she had trained herself to throw up/spit up to bolster credibility of what turned out to be malingering. Her fatal mistake: she used a glittery shadow one morning instead of matte shadow. The sun shining through window hit at right angle to reveal the glitter. I canceled the doctor's appointment. I had been worried that she had some sort of underlying chronic illness because she had begun the makeup tricks at end of a cold.

Edited November 20, 2008 by tibbyl

[fivetails]

Our dd11 is allowed to wear light coloured lipgloss (think like..oh what's it called...lipsmackers? Stuff that has a touch of colour..NOT lipSTICK) and nailpolish - the nailpolish can be just about any colour she wants...she's had blue, green, orange, whatever... no other makeup though... well, unless glitter gel is "makeup" - the body glitter stuff, y'know? :)

[Jackie in AR]

My dd is turning 12 on Saturday. She's been asking recently to be allowed to wear a little makeup...clear/light colored lip glosses mainly. I was wondering what the Hive thought about make-up for a 12yo. She is still so "young" in so many ways and certainly no interested in boys at all (that I can tell). I just don't want her to grow up too fast and yet I don't want to keep her a little girl forever either, KWIM? I'm asking this question b/c I'm putting together a little "beauty basket" for her for Christmas and was curious what to include. I have some nail polishes and nail gems (she love nail polish), some very light color or clear lip glosses and I'm wondering what else to include? Light colored eye shadow? Too much? Perhaps a new hair brush, some girly body washes, etc.? Any suggestions? Thanks.

 

I would allow clear/light lip gloss. And any of the nice-smelling body washes and light nail polish.

 

I would wait on the eye shadow.

[LG Gone Wild]

at 6. Guess she gets it from me. ;) Seriously, I was so into make up at 12. My mom wasn't very understanding. I plan to be different. My dd, I would probably let her do a little at 12 and mascara at 13. I would do more if she had skin problems she wanted to cover up.

[hsmamainva]

My oldest dd started with the clear flavored lip gloss (bubblegum, Dr. Pepper, watermelon, etc.) at around 12 or 13.

 

She didn't start wearing makeup every day (i.e., blush, mascara, colored lipstick, nail polish) until she was around 16. She's now 17 1/2 and wears makeup on the days she goes to the community college for classes, or if she's going out with her boyfriend, or if she's going out with her girlfriends, etc., but not on a daily basis.

 

My youngest dd will be 7 in January and she loves to have her fingers and toes painted!!! No interest in anything else in the makeup category.

[mamaof2andtwins]

My dd is 12 1/2 and has not asked about make-up yet. We have not set any hard and fast age rules on make-up. I guess I will cross that bridge when I am asked. Also, I will find out what her daddy thinks.

 

Jennie

[Lizzie in Ma]

clear lip gloss is all we allow and it can't be too shiny either.

[RoughCollie]

At age 12, I let my DD wear lip gloss or lipstick -- she never ventured into lipstick, though.

[Amber in SJ]

I let my dd start with a sheer tinted lip gloss and a "light" mascara at 12. By light mascara I mean something like Neutrogena Clean Lash Tint or Neutrogena Weightless Volume Wax Free Mascara. I allowed a tinted mascara because my daughter has very blond eyelashes. If her eyelashes were dark I would have started with clear mascara. By 13 she was putting a little concealer on the occasional zit and had added sheer color eyeshadow. Here we are at 14 and she has discovered eyeliner. She doesn't do heavy black, but she does like bright colors. She does a very fine, subtle line. I don't think she looks trashy and I have never had anyone say she looks trashy to me, and believe me, at our church someone would have said something to me. More people have commented about the occasional pink streak she likes to put in her very blond hair (it washes out) than her make-up.

 

With teenagers you have to choose your battles wisely. She is a sweet, loving, non-rebellious girl who occasionally chooses to express herself with teal eyeliner or magenta hair streak (Not at the same time!) I am OK with non-permanent forms of self-expressions because that is what the teen years are all about.

 

Just my .02

 

Amber in SJ

[Peela]

I don't like to control that sort of thing too much, because ultimately its not that important, and it turns something small into something big.

I wouldn't even call lip gloss make up, and if some lip gloss is all she wants, I just cant imagine why anyone would be so frightened of what that "means" as to forbid it. itis a natural part of growing up to want to play with that sort of thing.

My dd is 14 and chooses to wear make up now. I don't forbid it because I don't want to micromanage her life for her. She is mature enough to make decisions like that. She has told me many times she is so grateful I am like I am with her. She feels free to be herself. If she wore very provocative clothing I would set some boundaries, but she doesn't. She has an amazing fashion sense that she certianly didnt inherit form me.

Life is too short to make a deal out of something that is just a bit of fun. It is not just one short step from lip gloss to sexual promiscuity, which seems to be some peoples' fear.

[Pretty in Pink]

in that situation i think some nail polish, bonne bell lip products, and a beautiful brush/mirror set would make a sweet gift. maybe some pretty ribbons if she likes to tie her hair back.