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Tracey in TX

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Everything posted by Tracey in TX

  1. For every common sense parent who pulls their daughter out of a group of provocative dancers, there are a dozen parents waiting to get into the winning-est group. One of my daughters does competitive cheer. The little girls (under 15-ish) use music which I would readily listen to, not "sexing" up the girls in order to win at all costs. I've seen some itty bitty girls (7 and under) from other clubs dance/cheer to very suggestive tunes and pat each other's bottoms in a not-so-innocent fashion.
  2. Sara O'Mara Rhonda Maronda Emile (boy) Barton (girl) Pajama (pronounced "Paj-uh-muh) Sparkles Princess Sam Hill (remember southern expression, "What in the Sam Hill...?) Father Church--priest Dr. Anger--therapist/anger management
  3. DH was supportive for the first 2-3 months. I stopped at 2 months with #1, and 7 months at #2 (much longer than DH could tolerate), and didn't nurse our triplets.
  4. Mean Girls happen. Often times it is a reflection on the mom, but part of it is truly their nature. Not all girls are mean. Not all means girls have mean moms, and some mean moms have sweet girls. The best you can do is to prepare your DD to handle nasty behavior and know it isn't a reflection on who SHE is, but the over-inflated sense of self-importance for the other girl. Having three daughters, we've seen a lot of girl garbage. The most sensitive DDs will be hurt. At the risk of sounding harsh, you either teach DD to let the comments/behavior roll off her back or she will be hurt. You can't control other kids' actions, but you can help navigate through a lifetime of girl garbage. (Let's be honest, we've probably all dealt with grown women who are, um, less than desirable to be around..) My oldest DD, 12, has had more than her share of mean girl experiences. It was a result of *twelve moms* who wanted their dds to be popular. They created a fifedom to ensure both daughters and moms were popular (seriously! LOL), and wouldn't allow girls to associate with others outside of their group. This lasted from kindergarten-6th grade. We left school in 4th grade and have been told it's only gotten worse as puberty has kicked in. The point of this story is that we've used examples of this behavior to discuss what friends are, and what they aren't. Being popular is really fun, but it can be fleeting. A true friend will stay with you through mean comments, zits, boyfriends, and bad outfits. A fair-weather friend will ditch you when it's not convenient or self-serving any longer. Mean girl is practically a syndrome now, and isn't going away anytime soon. Best we can do is take a negative and make it a learning experience and give our daughters the tools to combat future situations.
  5. We have several laptops in addition to desktops. There are some advantages to both. Biggest negative to a laptop is the greater likelihood of breaking because it is mobile. I was very concerned about my kids having computer access, so we put them away at the end of the day. No computers in room without explicit permission. They are 'checked out' like a library book and returned at specific time. It gives kids feeling of being in control while still allowing us to actually keep control of what's going on. I will peruse the history to see what sites they've visited. Also have passwords to all their accounts. I will only use that in case of emergency--a 'just in case' scenerio.
  6. Every person is the US should have access to internet. The problem lies in that we still need people to design, develop, problem solve, and articulate in multi-sylabic text using one's own intellect. To rely solely on the great grey box has allowed our children's generation to become a-literate. Certainly unschooling has a place in the teaching/learning realm, but to encourage day-long video games is irresponsible parenting. (My boys and DH are die-hard video gamers, so this is in my area of reality.) Learning should be multi-faceted. Tactile manipulatives, old fashioned books, rote memorization, and technology should all be utilized to prepare the kids for what lies ahead. There are so many options available to teach. Why sit the kid in front of the tv all day, every day under the auspices of education?
  7. Our boys want long hair--at least much longer than dad prefers. We came up with a compromise between military "white wall" buzz cut over the ears and the European soccer shaggy cut. The boys must have hair out of eyes, preferably above eyebrows or brushed to side. Back of hair no longer than bottom of shirt collar. Nothing intrinsically wrong with long hair, but it goes against DH's wishes and we get the wrath of the in-laws when they see photos of boys sans the 1950's haircuts. LOL Boys are happy to compromise in lieu of the alternative.
  8. My girls gel back their hair--LOTS of gel!--and put in a pony tail for gymnastics. They can wear metal clips, but prefer not.
  9. One friend was sending vulgar messages, completely out of character for her. After the second I notified her. Her account had been compromised, but was fixed pretty quickly.
  10. We renewed our vows at 5 years. It was card-only. We're considering renewing at 20 years. Only thing we request is the presence (not presents :)) of our family and friends.
  11. I suspect the best thing to happen for this family is to continue the TV program. If art imitates reality, their marriage is far gone. Maybe the money will keep them together for awhile longer. Either way I can't stomach the show. It's like fingernails on a chalkboard.
  12. I find the school's threat to be petty. While said student and parents did agree to follow their regulations, they should have no say over behavior which is legal. Expulsion or suspension is an awful way to end a school year, for both the student and his classmates. If nothing else, the kid should be praised for being honest with his intentions instead of forcing him to lie to get what is rightfully his: the graduation ceremony.
  13. We spend $1700/mo for all groceries, household/beauty items for a family of 7 and two large dogs.
  14. I'm a relaxed parent, and am aware that something 'could' happen...but statistically speaking, probably won't. DDd is more likely to break her arm (again) biking than doing high level gymnastics. DS is more likely to be hit by a car in our alley than abducted by a stranger. I teach them to be cognizant of their surroundings and practice safety, but can't encourage paranoid behavior. Too many children are sheltered from the wonderful things in life because of the fear of something bad happening. If we don't allow our children to grow and make small mistakes while living with us, what will the ramifications be when out on their own and making big decisions for the first time?
  15. We have 2 boys and 3 girls, very close in age. Boys, without a doubt, are easier to parent IME. Two of my girls are as physical as boys, just not as stinky or muddy.:tongue_smilie: However, boys aren't catty. They're mad, fight (not necessarily in a literal sense) and it's done. Girls, OTOH, bicker, cat fight, make up, but still hold a grudge. There are also mind games that girls play. I don't understand it, but it starts really young--sometimes preschool or kindergarten. My boys are a breeze compared to my little lovely ladies! ETA: DS was the easiest baby. DD, born a year later, was in a bad mood from birth. LOL The triplets are B/G/G. B is easy going, and the girls are feisty and competitive. My vote is definitely skewed! (btw, tough week to ask this question :P)
  16. I suppose it depends on what the initial goal of homeschool is to accomplish. Ours was a superior education and a happy, well adjusted family. The education part is being accomplished. The happy portion is where the poll comes into play. DD,11, is really missing constant social interaction. She is unhappy and will almost certainly be returning to school in the fall. Not sure if it will be public or private school. Why should I keep her at home to prove a point? Her happiness is important. It's her life. While I desire to accomplish more goals, a person must put themselves in an environment to be both successful and happy. My others want to stay at home. Two will definitely be home next year, possibly all four. It would be so much easier to only educate 2 or 3 kids instead of all five (or four). The daily dynamic would change--for the better. So, yes, our children have a voice in their education. We have the final word, but their opinion is important.
  17. ROFL YES! I read the series over spring break for DD, to ensure it was appropriate literature. We finished break with DH suggesting we watch the movie to 'get it out of my system'. The sign of a good book is when you miss the characters and feel a sense of loss when it's finished. I tried reading Host, but it just hasn't drawn me into the plot as quickly as Twilight. The character development was interesting. Each of the main characters had depth and quirks which made them likable. It felt voyeuristic experiencing (reading) the magnetic bond Edward and Bella had. Yes, I'm having Twilight withdraws.
  18. Neighbor kids come over every day. It's the neighborhood hangout. It does get annoying sometimes, but allows a good insight into what's going on, an which kids are what they appear to be. If we're not leaving the house for activities, typically the kids all have snacks. Occasionally they'll stay for dinner, but it's usually just Friday night pizza. Weekends are almost always an impromptu sleepover--sometimes here or across the street. We live on a quiet street, so the kids have all been allowed to play outside sans adults since 5y/o. It's just expected. When a parent is working from home, kids know to come to our house. If DH is working from home, it's outside (which is normally the case, anyhow) or the game room upstairs. Best suggestion is find boundaries that work for you now. Know that they will change as the kids get older, but you are the parent and it is your castle!
  19. DS was showing preference from birth. DD was exhibiting signs within a month. (We have 2 lefties, 2 righties, and 1 ambidextrous. Three of grandparents were lefties, so we knew to expect it.)
  20. Before any play dates I will meet the mom, maybe grab lunch or have them over as a family for a cookout. I want to be comfortable with them, just as I expect they would want to feel the same about us. DD, 11, has been begging to play with her new swim team friend. The girls and us moms will get together this weekend (hopefully, unless something comes up) in order for the girls to be allowed to play at each other's homes. It will be some time before they're allowed to do sleepovers. Too many unknown for new family friends. I like the idea of the sexual crimes search.
  21. Call the local soccer clubs. I think every club in our area collects new and used soccer supplies for trips to Mexico and South America at some time throughout the year. Used cleats, jerseys, shin guards, goals, and balls are worth their weight in gold. Many times a sporting goods store will donate items to be included, for example bags, pumps, and additional balls.
  22. Imagine three babies climbing out of cribs before they're a year! (..and two who were still toddlers...) It was a sleep-deprived nightmare, but I don't believe in using crib tents. Instead we used toddler beds or mattress on the floor. For safety purposes there was a childproof door handle on the inside of the room. When they wanted something I heard a cry, wail, or complaint.
  23. Young men and video games go hand-in-hand. I personally think it's a yawn-fest, but refuse to shelter my children from the world. We raise them with our values, but granting them permission to slowly enter 'the real world' allows them to be tested. Yes, there is blood and guts in Call of Duty. I strongly urge anyone to skip the headphones, though, as it is a machine-gun style barrage of profanity. Without headphones or volume, that is avoided. (It's enough to make a sailor blush. :ohmy:) DH & our boys spend quality time playing golf and playing video games together. While I still think it's b-o-r-i-n-g, that's what they love to do. fwiw, our boys also play the same games outside sans the screen time, using air soft guns pretending to be in WWII. They're learning something more than just hanging out on the computer. (And for those who think it's for people who have nothing else going on in their lives--DH works a minimum of 75 hrs/wk and spends most of weekend at kids' sports. It's for busy grown-up boys, too.)
  24. :lol: I normally consider first college roommate scenerio, not future spouse. I had my own room by 8y/o because I was the oldest, and only girl. DH was a breeze compared to some truly psycho roommates! I agree with many posters that you need to know your own child. I chose to have DD, who is a VERY difficult child, room with the other VERY difficult sister for several years to enable them to look outside themselves. Nevertheless, giving them their own rooms was as much a gift to us as to them. I could never go back to their room sharing.
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